Words Carry So Much Weight In My Heart, Pls Watch What U Say 2 Me I’ll Remember It Forever

the conundrum never ends

(the painting is official gaspard and lisa art from their japanese twitter)

how do i feel? i feel like giving up bro

As I kid, I wanted to be a savior, trailblazer, the prophecy child. I wanted a big life, with ups and ups like the breasts of mountains and lows like the depths of valleys full of forgotten debris. I was convinced the great flood was knocking at my door, beckoning me to become someone bigger. A juvenile fantasy, a hazy dream.

I'm 19 now. It's not a grand big life, I'm no hero. I love my friends and sunday mornings. I like cats and strawberries. No flood, no rapture, no calamity- just quiet weekdays and sleepy weekends. But oh my days, I am full, finally.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The Flesh I Burned

if youre "career driven" fucking grow up. im hanging out driven. im goofin off driven. im grabbin a bite driven

A Tribute to the Unspoken, Just Words

But I wish you did— care.

It must have been impossible to insult Kafka. Like, imagine that you call him an insufferable asshole and he just agrees with you. And then he would write in his diary about it.

February 15th I know I am the most insufferable of humans. Horrible. No sleep. Awful.

June 25th. I sent another message just to unsend it 2 seconds later. My best friend asked me how I was today and I said 'I'm fine', what word can I use to define what I feel? What language burns in melancholy and drowns in loneliness only to go sleep with grief?

It's not so dramatic really. But it is.

unstoppable force (wanting to be the kindest version of myself) vs immovable object (all the anger and hatred I have inside myself)