Latest Posts by shatteringthestars - Page 7
i love comparing the fake stories that each twin was told
(commission info // tip jar!)
So I made a thing based on a comment @kinola14 said on my original post........ still regret nothing
in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda
in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda
in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda
in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda
in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda
getting yelled at by the skywalker siblings
what if instead of being under the impression that Darth Vader killed his father someone told Luke that Vader killed his mother and then Luke hit him w that accusation in the middle of their confrontation and Vader just started crying
I wish there was a sitcom about ghost Obi-Wan terrorizing Vader.
Bonus point: Palpatine who has no idea about Force Ghosts thinks that Vader gone completely mad after killing Obi-Wan.
I love how we as a fandom consider luke short when in actua fact he's 5ft 8
Sounds like you're part of the Bigger Luke Conspiracy to me đź‘€
But seriously, ME TOO. It's hilarious. That's several inches taller than me, and I love making that joke. I like to headcanon him as a little smaller, since afaik not all men are done growing at 19 so it's possible he's still small, but it's just hilarious because his dad is absolutely massive while Luke's just kinda on the short side for a guy in general, but not that short overall. The smaller Luke is, the easier it is for his dad to hold him!
The fact that Dramatic Bullshit Manor exists, and that Vader is over there, far away from the core of the galaxy/the major goings-on of the Empire (occasionally) AND that while he’s there he has time to do stuff like soak in a bacta tank and spend days searching for the key to resurrecting the dead for the seventy-billionth time seems to imply that Anakin gets, like, vacation time? I mean even if we presume that he CAN be contacted while he’s out, remember how Krennic had to haul his ass all the way out to Mustafar just to have a 15-minute 1x1 with him? I love the idea that Anakin may have been on PTO at the time and that’s why Krennic couldn’t just set up a Teams meeting or a Zoom call or @ mention Vader on the Imperial Senior Leadership Team Slack channel and ask to speak in private or whatever. Because when Vader takes vacation, he really likes to unplug, you know? His notifications are off on his phone, his out-of-office message goes up and everything. You wanna talk to him, you’re gonna have to physically show up at his door. Which is in the OUTER RIM.
Those must be generally really good times for every other Imperial employee who has to regularly interact with him, though. People probably plan their own vacation time specifically to NOT coincide with Anakin’s because those couple of weeks are the best weeks of the damn year. And sure, you probably wouldn’t necessarily assume someone at his level would be permitted to take a whole lot of time off given the ongoing turmoil and all, but also even Sheev surely has his limits. 100% would not judge him for being like “work-life balance is, uh, super important, Lord Vader, yeah that’s it, you take some time and unwind by ruminating on your greatest failures in a terrifying lava castle” just so he can get a couple weeks of peace.Â
Once Vader’s back, though, it’s probably a thousand times worse: he’s got all kinds of pent-up rage because he hasn’t choked anyone in weeks, he’s spent almost all of his time off crying about Obi-Wan and failing to make a Zombie Padme yet again, AND he wants to talk at length about whatever he binge-watched while he was gone and you’d better HOPE you had the same take on the romantic pairings in it that he did or there’s gonna be trouble.
Something about Luke being the spitting image of his father
Remember the time in the comics where Luke and the gang decided to come together and with the power of friendship...
... UNLEASHED THEIR BLASTERS ON THE BASTARD
Palpatine once again proving he is the biggest bitch in the galaxy
“I will not Fight you.”
I'd like to think he runs into the rebellion alot in this AU- like every other planet the are scout out for a base, he is there studying local ruins.
..... can someone please, PLEASE write an archaeologist luke star wars AU? Please?
One of my absolute favorite vader/luke "moments" happens in one standalone comic. At this point vader already knows that luke is his son, but luke still doesnt. Because in the new canon comics vader finds out about lukes existence shortly (between 1 or 2 weeks) after the destruction of the death star.
So in this comic vader and luke happen to be on the same planet and same place at the same time out of poor concidence of course (the force). Luke is there with r2 because of rebels alliance business, while vader is there for empire business and because he is on the search for 2 antik twin sith lightsabers who once belonged to a powerful sith lord. Vader and luke come in the possession of one of the lightsabers each and luke gets under the control of the one he has which makes him use the dark side and kill some stormtroppers, but he is able to shake it off shortly after. Long story short, the place is flooted with stromtroppers and luke is forced to get the hell away from this planet as fast as possible. He and r2 get seperated on the way. Meanwhile vader is still searching for the other lightsaber.
At the same time all of this happens, there is a podrace about to start any moment. Luke borrows (steals) one of the podracers to get away from the stromtroppers and is all like "flying that thing cant be that more different than a landspeeder, right?!" So luke does his first ever podracing competition despite that it isnt even his entention to take part in it, he just wants to get away.
Meanwhile vader stops in front of a big screen showing the race and because of the big podracing nerd he still is, he stops and watches in interest, while everyone around him freaks out when they see him and run away. At one point the commentator of the race mentions that it seems that a human pilot is on the lead and goshs about how great of a pilot he is. Vader watches on in fascination and is deeply impressed by the human pilots skills not knowing that it is his own son.
At the same time while everyone is impressed by lukes piloting skills he sits in the podracer freaking all out like "ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit! Not.like.an.landspeeder.at.all! NOT.LIKE.AN. LANDSPEEDER.AT.ALL!!!" In other words while eveyone is impressed by him even vader, luke has absolutely no idea what he is even doing nor does he realize that he is about to win the race and just trys his best not to end as a splash on the next rock wall.
Then while vader still watches in awe the race commentator makes a remark about how never before a human managed to survive that long in a podrace and had even good chances to win it. Because of that vader gets all pissy that nobody knows or remembers that HE was the first human ever who won a podrace (at the age of 9). And because of the petty and jealous idiot he is, he uses the force to sabotage the race and makes one of the engines of lukes podracer explode. Because if nobody remembers HIS archivments in the sport then no other human should ever get the praise instead.
So vader almost accidently killed his own son (its the third time by now) who was about to win a podrace just like his dad before him, because vader is a petty walking human disaster. Of course luke survives the crash uninjured and is all like "I will NEVER do that again!", because the force loves his grandkid and likes to make fun of his bratty son instead. Then r2 arrives with lukes x-wing and they take off to leave the planet.
The last page is vader looking after the vanishing x-wing, realizing in that very moment that his son was not only at the same place as him the whole time, but it was also him piloting the podracer. So, not only did he fail to capture luke when he was directly under his nose, he also almost accidently killed him out of pettiness over a sport. The comic ends with vader destroying the sith lightsaber (luke lost his one earlier) out of rage for missing the best oppunity ever to catch his kid. Destroying the very object he came for to this planet in the first place.
Elevator 2
#AWW ANAKIN YES
lil’ space cuties doodle
The Adventures of Luke and The Babby
The Simpsons, Season 2, Episode 10: Bart Gets Hit By A Car
This totally happened btw.
there is nothing cool or sexy about kylo ren he literally fucking sucks. like yeah anakin was also a homicidal facist but the difference is anakin was camp. he was hot while doing it. he had the dramatic flair. he’s badass. he’s intimidating. he’s the most iconic movie villain of all time. kyle is literally just an emo neo nazi. there is zilch that is interesting about his character. sorry for speaking the truth
reylos crying on twitter because Adam Driver explicitly confirmed that Bendemption was never originally in the plans for Kylo....this is justice for the last 8 years, actually
Over the Imperial Garden Wall