Having a traumatic childhood means you cannot talk even objectively about your basic foundational experiences without it being "venting", even if you're not actually venting. You just straight up have a huge chunk of your life you can't talk about, full stop, without it being trauma dumping.
And it not being socially acceptable to talk about your own childhood is super alienating. Sometimes people want to know why, and any answer you can give them is going to be off putting.
It's to the point I get irritated when something I said is framed as venting when I'm literally just talking about my life experiences, doing my best to keep emotion out of it.
I wish I could keep myself from dissociating and thinking of everything that's happened and then obsessing. I didn't think I'd end up this way. It's hard to deal with and let go.
It's all my fault in the end isn't it.
it sucks because for a minute i was happy, for a minute i was getting better, for a minute i had hope, but in a minute i lost it all again
“Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter.”
— Samuel J. Hurwitt
When you accuse loved ones of not caring about you, you may not realize it, but it’s hurtful.
I say this as someone who has been on both sides of this. I get the insecurity. I really do. But having now been on the other side of it, it is hurtful to be told that I don’t care about someone when I’ve been exerting energy to be there for them. I understand it’s from their own insecurity but it still hurts.
If you’re feeling insecure, it’s valid but this isn’t an okay way to deal with it. And it can actively damage your relationships and create self-fulfilling prophecies. Try to self-soothe. And if you can’t, it’s okay, but please seek out reassurance in a healthy way.
Artist of 20+ years. 33. Aro/Ace (depends) He/They. Depressive posting, tw for my reblogs and posts, I'm Schizophrenic among other things. ♋
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