I Have A Thing To Get To But Had To Get This Out Real Quick

A flow chart.  "NEGATIVE EMOTION" leads to "MALADAPTIVE RESPONSE", which leads to "FALLOUT".  That branches into the options "It's their fault for causing that emotion!" and "It's my fault for having that emotion!".  In both cases "Emotion" is circled.  Also circled is the "NEGATIVE EMOTION" item at the top, which is notated "Not the actual culprit".  There is an arrow pointing to "MALADAPTIVE RESPONSE" which is notated "THIS IS THE BASTARD"

I have a thing to get to but had to get this out real quick

More Posts from Resources-and-reminders and Others

We Produce Too Much Of The Wrong Stuff.

We produce too much of the wrong stuff.

in my dream world that i live in sometimes we stop saying things like “NOBODY is gross or dirty!!!” And start saying things like “being gross or dirty isn’t a moral flaw or failing”

Hey, take it from someone creeping towards 40:

Ignore the fun police.

If you like it, order your steak well done. Get your bagel toasted with jam and butter. Put ice in your scotch and ketchup on your hotdog. Get red wine with fish and white with steak. Who cares?

If you want to, listen to pop music. Watch blockbuster popcorn flicks. Read dime store novels. Enjoy them.

Dye your hair or cut it off. Paint your fingernails blue. Wear whatever the fuck you want on your own time (ie, when not at a job or school or whatever where you can get penalized for breaking rules) as long as you aren’t like welding or shoveling snow.

Anyone who tries to tell you you’re wrong? Say “okay” and go back to what you were doing. You’re not hurting them by enjoying yourself or having things the way you like them.

There are no caveats or addendums to this. No “but what about x?” Nah. You’re allowed the things you like. You don’t have to justify your taste or apologize for it if it’s not hurting anyone.

And likewise, let other people live their lives. We’re all dead in the long run, so tend your own garden before you become fertilizer in it.

Please do things to strengthen your attention span. It stresses me out so much when people just accept their small attention spans and cater to them without any acknowledgment that they are making it worse by doing that.

There is a reason attention spans are worse now and it didn’t just happen by chance. Media and the internet designed it that way and we went with it because it was easier.

Some of us with ADHD and brain fog need to meet ourselves where we’re at and exercise our attention span by watching a two minute video instead of a one minute video. Some of us need to sit down and read a novel with our phones turned off.

Wherever you’re at, just realize that not doing things that feel hard will keep making your attention span worse.

reminder that not all coping mechanisms are healthy and shouldn’t be excused as helpful simply because they are coping mechanisms.

Two job-hunting resources that changed my life:

This cover letter post on askamanger.com. A job interview guide written by Alison Green, who runs askamanager.

10 months ago

if it sucks hit da bricks <- litany against sunk cost

take it easy but take it <- litany against burnout/apathy cycle

fuck it we ball <- litany against perfectionism

now say something beautiful and true <- litany against irony poisoning

What The Fuck . House Brainrot

what the fuck . house brainrot

10 months ago

Have to keep reminding myself: "You need to put up with this shit because something you want is on the other side of it"

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