Ultisols Said: Wxke Af

This post generator is surprisingly coherent 

“the difference between crows and ravens is that crows romanticize sin”

You do not have to be valid.

You do not have to scroll through your notes

For a hundred hours repenting

You only have to let the problematic animal of your body love what it loves.

Teach ME a new word, please! Make it one nobody has said before.

[in my head] “snek.”

A cartoon I drew in about 2003. 

p.s. stay safe, and if you’re ordering lockdown reading, consider ordering it from your local comic shop or bookshop if you can.

p.p.s. I have a new book out soon: https://www.tomgauld.com/comic-books-v2

Heard some important information on Twitter today, and thought I’d post it here for anyone who may not have heard it. This is actually a thing, devised by a human rights organisation called Karma Nirvana.

Reblog to save a life?

Happy Birthday Chester. We miss you. ❤️ Feel free to post your favorite happy / funny / inspiring memory of Chester below.

this is a harvest mouse appreciation post

literally the cutest animal ever in history look at this lil fuzz

tiny bean ! friendly bean

they climb on basically everything. probably to get closer to kiss u

if this mouse gets any more disney than this it will probably break out into song

just look at this tiny nugget !!!

harvest mice use their tails for stability while climbing but also to be unnecessarily cute. this deters predators

tiny feet !!!!! tiny toes !

momma with itty puffs

kisses !! 1 hit KO

they are literally too small how dare

harvest mice !!!

harvest mice !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

harv e s t  m i c e  !! ! !!!

thankyou for your time

So I was looking up a certain kind of cellular automata on Wikipedia out of curiosity, and then I ended up seeing a link for something called “billiard ball computers”.

So basically it’s a theoretical construction to show nature has results that can be reversible or something. You do have to let the billiards be frictionless, though. So it’s not like you could implement this in real lif-

Um…

This guy???

Wait,, just look at the pictures they have though. The captions refer to crab groups as “swarm balls”, which is a very endearing term IMO.

Unfortunately, these gates take up a lot of space, so to do big computations you’d need lots of crabs and several hundred feet of cardboard.

i know an engineer-type dude who said fiction bored him, because fiction is mostly-formulaic and tropey, and you can generally guess what’s gonna happen next, and yada yada

so his solution for this problem was… to solely read serial web novels in languages that (1) he did not speak, and (2) for which there was no actual translation, fan or otherwise

apparently, the combined forces of “trying to figure out WTF is going on via the power of Google Translate" + “cultural differences in storytelling conventions” + “the inherent randomness of where the hell amateur authors are gonna take their plots”—those all mashed up to make stories that were unpredictable enough to keep him guessing all the time

then he described to me this totally batshit-sounding Hungarian story he’d been obsessively reading once a week for years

and god i think about him all the time.  like.  that is the most wild way to process fiction that i have ever heard of, but also, i’ve gotta admire the sheer chaos energy of it

A bunch of my friends all moved into a big group house called Valinor. I’m not capable of living together with that many other people, but they were kind enough to let me have a small semidetached unit on the same property, which clearly has to be called Tol Eressea.

Even though I got the name kind of by coincidence, I’m happy with it. The theme of the Silmarillion is the conflict between serviam and non serviam. The Vanyar say serviam, and win eons of unbroken bliss by the sides of the gods - plus never appearing in the books again. The Noldor say non serviam, and get the short end of every stick in every wood on Middle-Earth - but are also objectively awesome and everyone’s favorite characters.

The Teleri of Tol Eressea don’t do either. They agree to follow the divine plan, then get distracted by various interesting rocks and pretty trees along the way and show up late for the boat to Paradise. When the gods schedule an extra boat trip just for them, they end up permanently settling on the boat, anchored just off the coast of Paradise - so they can say they technically accepted the offer to redeem them and take them to Heaven, but don’t actually have to live there. They support the divine plan, but they’re just really really not joiners. This is a perverse sort of religion and also one that I 100% identify with.

Tol Eressea is called the Lonely Isle, but I suspect it is “lonely” only in the way Andrew Marvell described Adam before the creation of Eve:

Such was that happy Garden state When Man there walked without a mate After a place so pure and sweet What other help could yet be meet? But ‘twas beyond a mortal’s share To wander solitary there. Two Paradises 'twere in one To be in Paradise alone.

Not all of the Teleri go to Tol Eressea. Elwe stays in Middle-Earth out of love. Cirdan stays out of duty. Others stay to pursue random distractions or their own weird #aesthetic. This is not a people given to spectacular sins of pride the way the Feanorians are. This is a people who accept Law, who love Order, who are willing to contribute and sacrifice as much to its upkeep as anyone else, to defend their comrades and their principles even to the death - but whose concept of Law and Order is basically the gods as a night-watchman state who let them do their own thing. And the gods accept. I know there are some earthly religions who would say this is not an available option - but in Arda, at least, the gods are pretty chill.

The Teleri end up being liminal - less the Sea-Elves than the Shore-Elves or Strand-Elves (see also: “Grey-Elves”). The West represents Paradise and Oblivion, the East represents the sublunary world in all its suffering - so the Teleri live on the eastern fringe of the West, the western fringe of the East, and most of all on the island in the middle.

They are also called the Falmari, or “Singers”. Poe wrote in “Israfel” that the angels sing more sweetly than mortals because their lives in Pardise are so much better than ours down below. Modern sympathies would side with the tortured artist, reverse Poe’s prediction and say that mortals would sing more sweetly - or at least more interestingly - because of the twists and turns of life. Tolkien puts his Falmari somewhere in between. He gives them the master Palantir - allowing them to see everything that goes on in the world of Men - but also gives them Calacirya, the gap in the mountains that allows glimpses of the very center of Paradise. The Singers live in full view both of the glories of Israfel and the horrors of Poe, and they don’t turn away from either. Their music is an attempt at a synthesis - just like the Music of the Ainur before them.

Because of their liminal status, the Teleri end up as conduits. They’re the ones who bring warnings from Valinor to the Numenoreans. They’re the ones who ferry returning exiles back across the Sea. And most important, when the world needed to send a message to the Valar, it was through the work of the Teleri Cirdan (who if you read closely is basically the most competent and impressive figure in the entire history of Middle-Earth), that Earendil was able to invoke the Valar, and the power of Melkor was broken forever.

(thus it is written: “a Teller is someone who calls down celestial energies”. Also, “a Singer is someone who tries to be good”.)

There’s something in all of this that resonates with me. I don’t believe in God, but I like Him. If He exists, I want to be on His side. And I’m surrounded by amazing people, with pseudo-divine plans of their own, and I want to be on their sides too. But I also know I’m not a joiner. I’m not a Vala, involved in the creation of the new world; nor a Vanya, wise and noble enough to utterly subordinate his will to the cause. But I would like to think I can at least be a Teleri - vaguely on the side of Good, working to defend it; not necessarily great at doing it strategically, but pursuing ends closely-enough allied to it that sometimes I’m in the right place at the right time to accomplish something that matters. And even though I am definitely the sort of person to get distracted by an interesting rock when I am supposed to be seeking the Utmost West - to think that overall by a special grace maybe this will serve some purpose for the gods and they will accept the bargain. I’d like to think that I’m in the right sort of liminal position to communicate what needs to be communicated, to those who know less than me - and occasionally to my betters - and that this can have some useful role before the end. So I will accept the name of Tol Eressea and I will build the Lonely Isle.

…except everyone else is already calling my semi-detached unit “the Scottage”, and I have to admit that’s also pretty clever.