Bc Ive Seen Some Ppl Ask Me About It (and Bc Im Bored) Im Just Going To Say What I* Mean When I Mention

from complex ptsd: from surviving to thriving by pete walker

the thing that gets me the most about ableism against pd’s is that ppl will be like “these disorders make you an ASSHOLE!!!!” and then turn around and pretend that other disorders can’t and don’t make you act shitty.

depression and anxiety can make you irritable and snappy. they can cause you to refuse to listen to people and to be distant and withdrawn. they can cause you to seem angry, bitchy, rude, uncaring, etc.

ptsd causes an array of difficulties in forming meaningful relationships. it pretty much shakes up your entire worldview and sense of self a lot of the time. ptsd can cause you to get angry often. it can cause you to yell and scream. it can cause you to withdraw from others, run away, or cut them out. it can cause general changes in demeanor and more cynical worldviews. it can make you seem grouchy, negative, explosive, impolite, difficult, needy, controlling, etc.

and yet when people with personality disorders have symptoms of that nature, suddenly we are irredeemable monsters. when it’s npd, bpd, hpd, or aspd instead of ptsd or depression and anxiety, people suddenly and magically lose the ability to be understanding.

mental illness is an explanation, not an excuse. i firmly believe that. hurting others is never justified simply because you have any disorder.

but if you can be patient with people who have depression, anxiety, ptsd, ocd, or any other more well understood mental illness, you can be patient with us.

adhd + questioning npd culture is hyperfixating on npd and over analyzing your thought processes instead of taking care of basic needs and responsibilities or engaging with other people

-🍎

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Some of you think bpd is the only pd and it rly shows lmao

I relate.

Sick and tired of narcissists being talked about like mythological wild animals. I just read something that described covert narcissists as “highly defensive and extremely hostile”. I’m not a skittish dog. Why can’t you put it as “traumatised with extreme trust issues” like you would for any other less stigmatised disorder?

where is the love for people who are manipulative by nature and are trying their best to fight it? we tell cluster Bs all the time that they're not inherently manipulative or toxic but what about those of us who are? some of us are inclined towards being toxic or manipulative by nature. some of us lack essential social functions like empathy and compassion, and it's not because we're evil, it's because repeated trauma degraded our brain's ability to perform those functions. it can be a constant, exhausting battle to not want to be cruel, but to have to fight your very nature to avoid cruelty. i think that those of us who have to carry that burden deserve love.

I genuinely don’t get the whole shtick that NPD makes you a bad person, for many reasons.

I mean most obviously a disorder doesn’t define you but like, in my experience it’s also just that NPD does the exact OPPOSITE of what people think it does!

it can be a horrible thing to deal with, I won’t deny that. But it has forced me to confront two choices- who I am/who I want to be, and who NPD wants me to be. Like, most people don’t ACTIVELY make the choice not to hurt or manipulate others, but I do because NPD is always influencing my desire to be in control and manipulate others. It’s much more present in my mind which means i HAVE to actively make a choice every day to not hurt other people. So actually, NPD just reveals the kind of person I actually am, which is a good one!

I didn’t choose the emotional struggles that forced me to develop this way, but i DO choose how I react. When I want to yell and hurt, i CHOOSE to be kind instead. I’m not saying that I never fuck up or anything like that, I mean hell y’all have seen me fuck up a lot. but even with all the narc crashes and self esteem issues, I am glad I have NPD because I wouldn’t know how much I care about doing the right thing without it!

BPD culture is I know everyone leaves eventually. I can't get mad at people for saying they're not going to leave me, they don't know they're lying yet. It's a lie they won't know they're telling until they're already half way out the door. I know how it goes. I can't expect anything else.

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“not everything in life is about winning” ok then what the fuck is it about? losing ?? genuinely how can you live with yourself if you just let others beat you