Uuuuhh Part 1

aegon: what would the chef recommend? worker: ...sir, this is a mcdonald's. aegon: oh my bad. what would the mcchef recommend?

okay, there's a trend that came and went on tiktok a while ago of people reading their lists of modern day things they think characters would have loved if it were in their time. i will never EVER get tired of watching them and those vids heavily inspired this post 😭 (ALSO FIRST WRITING SINCE IVE BEEN BACK LETS GOOOO)

so without further ado...

rip thorin's company, you would have loved... (pt. 1)

thorin

r.i.p. thorin, you would have loved lord huron

rick grimes from the walking dead

wet brushes

google maps

making a secret thirst trap account on tiktok

bilbo

r.i.p. bilbo, you would have loved trader joes

ring doorbells

facebook neighborhood watch

swiffer wet jet

keeping up with the kardashians

gandalf

r.i.p. gandalf you would have loved life360

caines chicken

st. louis city museum

grammarly

child harnesses

fìli

r.i.p. fìli, you would have loved Instagram reels

sad older sibling tiktoks

caseoh

0.5x pictures

hello kitty/sanrio girls

kìli

r.i.p. kìli you would have loved mewing

native hair wash

tiktok

snapchat streaks

photodumping on instagram

dwalin

r.i.p. dwalin you would have loved planet fitness

to catch a predator with jim hansen

the will smith slap drama

dude wipes

teenage mutant ninja turtles

balin

r.i.p.balin you would have loved ibuprofen

turbotax

eBay

low quality inspirational quotes on facebook

air fryers

bofur

r.i.p. bofur you would have loved impractical jokers

the superbowl

cringey minion memes

andy bernard from the office

snoop dog

ori

r.i.p. ori you would have loved minecraft

selling stuff on etsy

aesthetic pinterest boards

the perks of being a wallflower

spotify premium

dori

r.i.p. dori you would have loved five minute crafts

the pioneer woman cookbook

abba

hgtv

temu

(i forgot there's a 10 image limit😞)

lemme know if you guys want a part 2 !! it feels great getting to write whatever i want again!! love you guys so much!! also please send me requests cause i need to get these creative juices back into the flow of things 😭🙏 thank you! 🩷💘💞🌷🌸🌺

tag list : @kumqu4t @tolkien-fantasy @blueberryrock @to-be-frank-i-dont-care @luna-xial @legolaslovely @fizzyxcustard @pistachiozombie @imaginexhobbit @beenovel

Sometimes a family is you, your 200-year-old mom, her sad robot boyfriend, your dead father, your other dead father who your mom says was really your brother

Your uncle/fourth dad, your cousin/brother, his dead mom

A noir detective, his secretary, his weird brother from Maine, and your evil cyborg fifth dad who haunts his brain

The Irish pit fighter who doesn’t like you but follows your mom around like a puppy

A French medical researcher who’s also a robot

A militiaman with clinical depression

Your weird uncle you think might be a shapeshifter

A reporter and her 12-year-old sister

A cool drug-abusing mayor with no skin and a bodyguard who might be his daughter

The sad robot boyfriend’s one (1) friend, also sad

Your mom’s estranged grandson the Terminator

A handful of neighbors including a mechanic, a couple with lots of emotions, a former fortune teller, and the guy whose personality is “salesman for a company that no longer exists”

Your seventh parent the butler (actually a robot this time)

The dog who’s a part-time detective, the cat your mom stole off a giant airship, and the giant cannibalistic ogre who functions more like a pet than the other two.

And that’s okay.

ao3 is crazy because you'll read the most gut-wrenching 200k word slowburn that leaves you sobbing into your sweater at four in the morning and the author will be applejacksmonstercock

Thinking about a scenario where some big evil threatens Albion during Sparrow's reign as queen and she and the other three heroes unite once more to deal with the threat while her son has to be left at home with his little sister. Then the big evil threat comes knocking on their door while Sparrow can't get to them, Walter is knocked down and Logan knows he has to protect his little sister but he doesn't know what to do so he just hugs her and screams and then releases a powerful wave of magic to destroy the enemy.

Basically Logan having Will is on my mind all the time and in this essay I will-