The Bitches Traumatized By Saltburn Would Never Survive The Fics In My Ao3 History

Rip Ben Finn, you would have loved eating cereal at 3am.

Rip Page, you would have loved debate club.

Rip Walter Beck, you would have loved the found family trope.

Rip Jasper, you would have loved the Scrub Daddy.

Rip Reaver, you would have loved red carpets and glambots.

Rip Sparrow, you would have loved a fucking break.

Rip Theresa, you would have loved The Sims.

Rip Logan, you would have loved Lexapro.

Rip HoBW, you would have loved pop music.

I see no lies.

Someone pointed out how Luke would always turn to Jace whenever he was anxious and Jace would lean in closer to reassure him and now I’m sad all over again.

father, son, holy spirit.

That flourish where your hero jumps on an enemies shoulder and snaps their neck with their thighs holds such a special place in my heart, what a way to die

i’m not switching between my hyperfixations because i’m autistic, i’m just a whore

Random Fo4 Companions Headcannons.

With no explanation or order, because I said so.

Gage fucking hates coconut. Also tatos/tomatoes. And he's never eaten muscles/clams/squid but you couldn't make him. Honestly I see him being more of a picky eater than he would ever admit to. If you took him to a red lobster he'd sit in the bar with nothing and noticibly and angrily glare at you or the lobsters the whole time.

Danse loves kids, teaching them, working with them ect. But not only is he socially awkward as all hell, he's naturally a bit commanding which to kids is scary and to teens is annoying. He's aware of this, but has no idea how to mediate it so he just, "heyyyy....champ?"

Cait is the same way with kids but she just dips.

Playing poker with deacon would be like holding a staring contest with a statue.

Having a staring contest with x6 would be like playing poker with deacon.

A poker match or staring contest between deacon and x6 is like taping bread jamside up to a cat.

Dogmeat does that thing that cats do and tries to sit/sleep right on your chest and suffocates you.

Strong loves playing with toys, and wishes he had someone to play fight with. Also he understands that he's a super mutant and still feels like humans should be food, but still doesn't know why people don't like him and it makes him sad.

Piper is evil.

Preston sleeps in the fetal position. He also overheats a lot, but then gets cold, so sleeping soundly is an event for him. He would also make the best educator, of any level. Mainly cause he's clear and precise but also cause if you're stupid (like me) he doesn't get mad if you need things explained.

Ada is actually capable of moving faster but simply chooses not to.

Curie has a crush on Danse, but doesn't understand what that is emotionally so she just likes to watch him and try to learn about him. Danse finds this unerving and weird, but she's essentially harmless so he doesn't make her stop.

Old Longfellow is very lonely and just wants someone to tell stories to. (This might just be cannon ngl)

Codsworth is in denial about the bombs and the death of soles spouse and Shaun being gone. Synth Shaun wouldn't be able to shake him, and if ss chooses a romantic partner, codsworth is both very overly chummy with them, but also super passive-aggressive aggressive towards them.

Ham cooked loves lotion and stuff. Obviously it doesn't really do anything for him, but it's like cat nip to him. He just wants to rub it all over his face.

MacCready(how tf is ur name spelled dude???) sucks at taking care of others people's kids. He'll fight them, but like on their own level.

Kid: "you're a meanie!"

Mac: "Well YOU'RE A POOP FACE!"

*collective gasps and oooo's from other kids watching*

Elder Maxson is so funny to me bc he’s this head honcho of the most organized modern post-war militia in the Wasteland and he’s 20 and still has a baby face and uses a beard to hide it but it makes it worse actually

me every time I find an attractive character in HOTD: