Latest Posts by nickyiscool - Page 2
i’m not someone who was ever made to be treated kindly.
i hurt people because i am hurt, yet i always manage to make myself out as the victim, I’m always viewed as awful, so why should i ever know what its like to be loved? i dont think it matters anyway, i always reject kindness. its almost annoying when people try to love me
i don’t know where to put all these feelings and it’s killing me
it’s actually fucking killing me
Why do I keep thinking of harming myself
I genuinely need help why do I keep pushing people away
Mf got me curling up into a ball sobbing and heaving
sometimes I just get so sick and tired of fighting just to survive.
"It's all in your head." - Thank you Janette, that's why it's called mental illness. It cannot be in my ass.
Sorry for having symptoms of a mental illness I literally told you I have it will happen again
"You’re so polite" thanks i was raised in constant fear of upsetting people.
I will be like "I'm fine" and then another fucking event will occur
yall are pro mental illness until they hallucinate
yall are pro mental illness until they dissociate
yall are pro mental illness until they self-isolate
yall are pro mental illness until they're paranoid
yall are pro mental illness until they split
yall are pro mental illness until it's too Scary for your comparatively neurotypical brain to handle
"Are you ok?" I'm actually tired bro. From the bottom of my heart I'm tired
i feel like i will never be better or have the potential to be better and my life will consist of the same patterns forever
Yearning for someone to love and take care of me tbh
Bpd culture is I wish I wasn’t like this anymore. Feeling so much all the time for the smallest things gets so exhausting I just wish it could stop.
.
I’ll never find love, I’ll never find the one, I just keep pushing people away, why do I do that?, why, why me?, why does it have to be me? Why can’t I be normal? Why can’t someone see that I’m struggling, I’m not ok, help, I can’t do this, I want him back, so I miss him or the idea of him, why did he make me feel so special, why did I feel so uneasy? Is it the universe teaching me something or am I just borderline mentally ill
How did I do today?
Were you proud of me? Did I do okay? How did you think I acted today? Was I talkative enough?did I make you happy? Did I make you uncontrollably laugh, like I usually do?
Or
Was I a failure like usual? Did I upset you? Did I act differently today? Did I go non-verbal like the little fucking dumb@ss I am? Did I make you depressed? Did I make you concerned, like I usually do?
do you hate me?
hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me hate me?
do you want me to shut the fvck up? I'll gladly do that for you. I'll do anything for you. I'm afraid I don't have my own personality anymore, can I borrow some of yours? Make myself seem more interesting and likeable for once in my life? Just so I can fit in and do what others do??
I feel myself falling.
I begged as for Him back and Mf still questioned if I cared
wish i could tell him i miss him
my soul is too sensitive for this life.