“I Don’t Do Math Because I’m Gay” “the Gays Can’t Do Math” “If I Explain Math On Tumblr

Made a sequal to my shitpost

so much care put into housing this aging spider. why are my eyes wet

(tiktok link)

We all know what erectile dysfunction is but literally no one is ever taught what vaginismus is and it can cause people to feel extremely lost, broken, and cause people to take their own lives. Raise. Awareness.

You know, when I first heard about an order of nuns who hunted succubi, I thought I'd be in danger, but honestly I'm thriving. I don't even need to hunt for prey anymore, I just show up in a village and within a day I've got a virtuous maiden offering herself up. Sure, they have to pretend like they're going to fight me off first, but their hearts are never in it and it always ends with them saying things like "leave this village alone, take me instead!" It's adorable, really. The way they tremble and whimper, you'd almost believe it was a noble sacrifice they were making, and not what they hoped for all along.

WE’RE WE HERE FUCK WE’RE SHIT QUEER UP

Ok, the things I’ve heard about this fandom being a cognitohazard for trans women are not wrong. I’ve woken up the past few days imagining vines curling over my thighs and I’ve already changed the reminder on my phone for my HRT to ‘Take your Xenodrugs.’ What is HAPPENING to me??? How was it so easy???

It's called a stingray. The way these work is they simulate a cell tower. Your phone is programmed to connect to the strongest cell phone tower. The device is small enough that it can be carried in a car. As such, law enforcement or other groups with access to one can simply drive around a protest and collect your data. If you absolutely need a phone, cryptophones have IMSI capture countermeasures or alerts. Please research cryptophones before buying one as not all are made equal and some wont have these features. The only way to be truly safe is to leave your phone at home.

State law enforcement tends to be extremely secretive about the use of Stringray. Some states require law enforcement to have warrents to use these, but it has been seen that law enforcement will use these in nearly all investigations regardless of having a warrant. States confirmed by the ACLU to have these devices are, Washington, Nevada, Arizona, Alaska, Missouri, New Mexico, Georgia, Massachusetts, Oklahoma, Louisiana, Pennsylvania, Delaware, California, Texas, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, Indiana, Tennessee, North Carolina, Virginia, Florida, Maryland, and New York. If your state is not on this list, it does not mean that they are not using this device. It just means police haven't disclosed usage.

I'm sorry but it's way too sketchy to have to "sign up" for a protest. There's no reason you should have to give anyone your full name, email, phone number, and/or address in order to march in the streets. People are getting arrested left and right because cops have access to information that connects people to the protests they were at. If an organization is having people "sign up to join the fight," all the cops need to do is access that list.

Just go. Don't leave a fucking paper trail.

Cherry blossoms are gay

Cherry blossom affini are by default gayer

Prove me wrong (you can’t)

mech pilot who got separated from their mecha when their civilisation was domestication and their military got dissolved. despite all attempts to help them, they still have persistent phantom sensation from the limbs that they used to have but no longer do; constantly missing the feeling of a rifle in hands that don't feel the right size, feeling blind and deaf without all of the enhanced feedback from sensors capable of a hundred times greater acuity than their own body

eventually, however, one particular affini reads their medical file and comes up with an idea. she files a notice of intent on the pilot, then swiftly heads over to their hab and whisks them away the next morning. they don't even bother resisting; having long since given up hope that things will get better, and unable to imagine any way they could get worse

the affini takes them home and lays them down on a surgery table, promising them that soon, everything is going to feel right again. they expect nothing, presuming her to be lying to them, but they feel a great weight behind their eyes, and a moment later, they fall closed.

it feels like they've only blinked, but when they reopen them, everything is different. every sense that was missing is suddenly there again. they look down at their arms to find them just the right size; their body no longer one of flesh, but of gleaming white metal plates, pulsating with thin green lines of a material they don't recognise. it takes them a moment to realise what it is: under their metal skin are muscles and tendons made out of vines, their former optical sensors replaced with sight blossoms, and their rifle woven back together from a mixture of bark, chambered with rounds made of amber

most of all, they are no longer alone. they could feel their mech before, but it's different this time; as if the sensation surrounding them isn't quite their own, but a body that is both theirs and not. a faint, slow pulsing that shifts in time with every movement, guiding them to know exactly where to look, and what to do. moments later, they hear a voice whispering- not into their ear, but directly into their mind, just like their onboard AI used to:

"Good morning, my precious little Pilot."