mikus0na

Latest Posts by mikus0na

[two tumblr soldiers bleeding out on the internet frontlines]

“heh… remember strawbebby…. And ranibow spramkle… always made me laugh”

“Don’t talk like that man. We’re gonna get out of here i prommy.” [mortar fire sails overhead and land nearby] “christ its like a childrens hospital out there”

[through shallow breaths] “I always loved…… the color of the sky…………”

End scene

is it still ethical nonmonogamy if one of the partners is evil

i think it's strange how many people i meet at college who are just like. straight up anti-intellectuals. curtains-are-just-blue "it's not that deep" bros. like babygirl buddy why did you come here

The way most autism literature describes "literal interpretation" is often not at all similar to how I experience it. Teenage me even thought I couldn't be autistic because I've always been able to learn metaphors easily.

In fact, I love wordplay of all kinds. Teenage me was fascinated to learn all the types of figurative language there are in poetry and literature.

But paperwork and questionnaires are hard, because there's so much they don't state clearly. Or they don't leave room for enough nuance.

"List all the jobs you've had, with start and end dates." What if I don't remember the exact day or month? Is the year enough?

"Have you been suffering from blurred vision?" Well, if I take off my glasses the whole world is blurred, but I'm fairly sure that's not what the intake form at the optometrist is asking.

Or the infamous (and infuriatingly stereotypical) "Would you rather go to a library or a party?" What sort of party? Where? Who's there? I work at a library. Am I currently at the library for work or pleasure? Does it have a good collection?

It's not common figures of speech that confound me. It's ambiguity, in situations that aren't supposed to be ambiguous.

Hi my name is Don Quixote of La Mancha the Knight of the Rueful Figure and I have a rueful figure (that's how I got my name) with purple bruised ribs and tall stature and gaunt features and hair turning gray and a rather hooked aquiline nose and large black drooping mustaches and a lot of people tell me I look like Amadís of Gaul (AN: if u don’t know who he is begone!). I’m not related to Lady Oriana but I wish I was because she’s an incomparable flowering beauty. I’m a knight errant but some of my teeth and grinders are missing. I have long lank limbs. I’m also a defender of damsels, protector of orphans, succourer of the needy, righter of wrongs, undoer of injustice, and I wander a magic countryside called the mountains of Spain where I’m in my first year of knighthood (I’m forty-nine). I’m a gentleman (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly armor. I love my great-grandfather's forgotten corner of the house and I cobble together all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a doublet of fine cloth with matching shoes and velvet breeches and a helmet, morion, visor, breastplate and backpiece. I was riding outside La Mancha. It was early morning so the rays of the sun fell obliquely and the heat did not distress me, which I was very happy about. A lot of giants stared at me. I put up my pasteboard visor at them.

I sent my inner child to work at a steel cable plant to make some extra cash and it got mangled in an industrial accident and died in the hospital so I really don't have to protect it or whatever anymore. good luck with your self care stuff though

party like a severed head

look like a severed head

smoke like a severed head

fuck like a severed head

i need people to understand that making a blanket statement about what corsets were or what purpose they served is like if you made a blanket statement about panties and why people wear them and you didn't specify whether you meant g string thongs or boxer briefs or a jockstrap or cotton bikinis or

if im being totally honest, the biggest reason I wish people on this website had paid more attention in english class and had reading comprehension is so that they would understand when and why jokes are funny. Maybe if y'all understood that a line like "None of these words are in the bible" is only funny because its totally unexpected. Or maybe if y'all understood how to construct jokes for yourself, we wouldn't have so many comments like "OP check your carbon monoxide detector" because you'd ALSO know how to build a joke. but anyways its the weekend so im fine about this. I'm normal about this. im NOT bothered.

they’re changing the desktop background on all government workers computers to a picture of my bright smiling happy face to increase productivity

why is your orange

i used to be a basketball

🟪 minecraft-elvis follow

woah mama i tried to water bucket clutch in the nether

🟦 speedrunner-elvis follow

woah mama you suck

🟪 minecraft-elvis

bitch

🟦 speedrunner-elvis

wooaaahhh mama @/elvis-corrector he didn't say the line woah mama

🔫 elvis-corrector follow

say the fucking line or you go to the big toilet in the sky

🟪 minecraft-elvis

woah mama i'm being threatened *wiggles my legs in defence*

🔬elvis-scientist follow

this elvis is clearly in distress, they only wiggle their legs in such a funky way to ward off predators, the little guy thinks his life is in danger please be more responsible with your elvis husbandry

🔍 elvis-detector follow

BEEP

compilation

i love seeing posts like "SELL ALL YOUR TESLA STOCK NOW!!" on tumblr dot com like they do not let you buy stocks if you know what a karkat is

I was tasked with a job

my dashboard simulator

mutual 1: I am going to kill all of you

mutual 2: *70 consecutive reblogs of a fandom you've never heard of until today. every time you refresh there's 30 more.*

mutual 3: *image of a guy in a dog collar* why did he do this

mutual 4: *reblogs of beautiful picnic scenes*

mutual 5: everyone get fatter now

mutual 4: just thought about dunking them in blood again 🤍

mutual 3: *image of the same guy but blurry and far away* is this allowed

mutual 6: I love music 🎵🎶🎵🎺🎹✨💖🌈

mutual 7 that we are all beginning to suspect is actually a dog: do you guys ever think about chewing on bones haha

mutual 6: anyone ever heard of this shit called music? *image of stickman covered in blood*

mutual 5: make him a woman NOW!!!

mutual 8: if you ask me about my ocs I will kiss you on the mouth

mutual 9: hey what happened to mutual 10

mutual 10: day 173 of being lost in the mountains. I have begun to recreate my family's faces out of the river clay. at night I recite my favorite songs so that they may never leave my memory. I am beginning to forget birthdays. I haven't tasted a grain of sugar in months.

mutual 7: that mailman will pay.

the new system is simple: you have light coins, which can only be redeemed at virtuous businesses, and darkness coins, which can only be spent on wicked things. you can tell which is which based on the karmic debt of the figure depicted on the face of each coin.

evangelicals being like "god made men to do This and be like This and women to do That and be like That that's just how it is" and it's just a picture of a white man and woman following traditional gender norms makes me so insane like you boring fascist fucks. god made 2 million species of beetles. god made whales, ducks, humans, and 1500 other species capable of same sex behavior. god made fish and amphibians that change sexes. god made more than 30 different intersex variations in human beings. god, in his infinite curiosity. wake up!!! fuck!!

theres apparently a strain of weed named white yoda?

Tumblr Code.

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is horrifying weapon attack

I'm going to *remembers suicide is often not a desire for death itself but rather an attempt to radically change one's life because the current state of being has become unbearable but the person can't think of any way to change it other than death* kill myself

seeing straight men be disgusted by booktok smut recommenders has actually radicalized me to the side of booktok smut recommenders. girls your taste may be atrocious but i will never disparage you for exposing mainstream discourse to the concept of soaking through your underwear. spent my whole life listening to men talk about penises it’s about time they get jumpscared by women talking about pussy in crude detail on social media. go forth and goon my warriors

People who call u without warning for non serious reasons are so scary like if you call me without texting me first im fully assuming you’re in a saw trap or something

caving expedition in the body of a fallen angel