Mewhenigettosilly - Getting Silly On Here >:3

I’ve been alone before, but being alone again still hurts.

i hate how its becoming normalised to make rap3, SA, p3d0philia/child predat0r and abuse jokes, its one of the most unfunny category of jokes, and imo its not even a joke, cause why are you trying to make joke of something so serious ?

i just be saying shit that makes no sense 😭😭

i think i have bpd but idk how to mention it to one of my therapists because what if im wrong and just being an attention whore ˙◠˙

idk what happened to my day, but I feel really bad now. I guess that's what I wanted

I js feel very small. Like I want to be. I really want someone to care for me, and like me, and not make me feel bad. I'm very scared right now, I don't have anyone to help me, and its really scary. I know I kinda joke about suicide but I don't tell anyone about how bad it gets. I don't like getting violent thoughts to hurt myself, I just want to be held and taken care of, and understood that I can't be ok

Whatever, mb, my throat really hurts

It’s so weird that people’s first thought isn’t cutting themselves when they’re having a shitty day. Crazyyyyyy like I’m about to have the time of my life with my blades when I get home.

"No M, you can't carve the name of all your mutuals and friends onto your body !"

God forbid a boy has hobbies 🙄

I don't rlly understand why I don't fit in with anyone :/ everyone just becomes boring, or is mean to me, or treats me in a way I don't want. I try to keep an open mind about my friends/people, but I want friends that are decent people. I want to surround myself with good people, because they would be good, and maybe I'd figure out the correct way to live and act around people, but everyone's who's bad has found there way to me ╯︿╰

I really want to cut off my friends because their so toxic and make me feel like shit, but I don't have anyone else to hang out with at school :/

I might not even talk to them, but at least I don't look like a fucking loner :(

One of them in particular is pissing me off cause they always tell me about their relationship struggles or their interests, and whenever I tell them something they dont listen. I can't care about them at all atp, like your partner doesn't like that you like men ?? Well I fucking told you that they were toxic I can't help you. The fuck do they want me to do ??? They send me weird images or weird things in general, and I tell them to stop and they never apologise and continue. They js make me uncomfortable and they used to punch me alot ╯︿╰ I fucking hate my friends, I'm gna jump into a meatgrinder.

idk if im gonna be able to keep myself stable enough to fake being non suicidal in therapy tmrw :P Plus i think my hearts gone again, so if i get hospitalised, uhhhh :(((( I'll cry :(( because i wont be alowed on my phone, and i need to be online otherwise i wont be able to get any attention ╯︿╰