Supportive Space-uncle

all i want is for a batman and superman movie to be as gay as deadpool and wolverine

Damian: Father is going to curse you out, so I’ll ask. Can we have the scroll?

Ra’s Al Ghul: No.

Damian (raising his voice in a high-pitched, innocent tone): Please!

Ra’s (usual strict voice until he sees his grandson's face): No—why are you looking at me like that?

Damian faked a sniffle, pouring on the sad puppy dog eyes and lip quiver. The usually fearless and intimidating Ra's struggled to maintain his composure, covering his mouth to hide his amusement.

Ra’s: Stop it! Don’t pull that crap on me!

Damian (laying on the sweet kid tone): But grandfather... I love you.

Ra’s (trembling): Fine! You can have the scroll! Just quit the act!

Damian immediately returned to his usual self, sporting a smug smile.

Damian: Thank you! We’ll wait here while you retrieve it.

Ra’s groaned and walked off to fetch the magic scroll in question as Batman approached his son.

Batman: What did you say?

Damian: I used manipulation and reminded him I’m his only grandchild... along with puppy dog eyes.

Batman chuckled, shaking his head with pride at his son’s cleverness.

i promised you 🦋

(crossposting from x, bsky, & ig)

Jason and Dick falling back into being brothers after Jason gets resurrected except both of them keep forgetting that although Dick is still older, Jason is now very much not a small little Robin anymore.

Dick, pointing to an ugly old guy on TV: that’s you

Jason, gesturing to a pug: that’s you

Dick: *flicks the side of Jason’s head*

Jason: do that again and i’ll smash your face in

Dick: bring it on, little wing!

Jason: *jokily shoves Dick off the couch*

Dick: *flies two feet and smashes through a glass table*

Tim and Damian watch Dick try and sneak up on Jason from behind to shove him in the pool but Jason doesn’t even budge, and they see Dick’s eyes widen in regret before he gets judo-flipped into the water. Jason tries to jump in after but forgets how big he is and manages to both land directly on Dick’s flailing body and cause a wave big enough to drench Alfred standing at the other edge. Damian turns dead eyes onto Tim,

Damian: promise me we’ll never be that immature.

Tim: we can learn from their stupidity

Alfred, dripping onto the tiles, Jason and Dick struggling in the background: please see that you do.

Hehehe 😊😘

bruce would be fucking HILARIOUS in his idgaf era just imagine:

bruce: come home

jason: what? so you can throw me in--

bruce: no, just come home. i want you home, so come home.

jason: i'm not fallin for this shit!

bruce: i no longer care about all of *points between himself and jason* this mess. i want to go home, play monopoly with my kids and be mad about the lot of you cheating. that is what i want, so that is what will happen.

jason: you're being ridiculous.

bruce: frankly, i dont give a fuck. now, what piece do you want, the hat or the car?

jason:....

bruce:.....

jason: the car.

bruce: fantastic, be home in 10.

The batfam trauma candy salad would go absolutely insane.

Dick: Hi. I'm Dick Grayson and when I was 8 I watched my parents fall to their death in front of me, then I had to move away from everything I love and spend the rest of my life in some weird American city. And I brought the sour gummy worms.

Jason: This is so stupid- my mother used to kick me out when he drug dealer would come over so I didn't see her spending our very small amount of money on drugs.

Steph *off screen*: what did you bring?

Jason: nerds.

Cass: I was raised to be a weapon, a murderer. I brought peach rings.

Steph: I'm Steph and My dad was an alcoholic who thought he could go head to head with batman and outdo the riddler. And I brought Reese's pieces.

Tim: I'm Timothy Drake Wayne and I had left the house to try and find some guy before he killed my dad, just for him to kill my dad when I was gone. I brought sour rainbow strips.

Duke: My parents are in a mental ward, high on joker toxin. No one knows if they'll ever get better. And I got m&m's.

Damian: I am a highly trained assassin and-

Steph: cut. Cut. Damian. Civilian identities. Ok. Restart.

Damian: My mother randomly dropped me on some weird man's doorstep when I was ten. I brought rock candy.

these loverboys

ngiiiii toritsuka curious to see saiki without his glasses so he asks saiki to take off his glasses and saiki's like "you will turn to stone" and toritsuka's like "its okay its just 24 hours who's going to notice haha i was absent for a week when your brother abducted me and im fine ☺️"

Saiki ".... 😕 sorry"

anywayyy. next time torisai see each other, saiki's wearing normal glasses like. clear ones and toritsuka's like "HOLY SHIT. YOUR EYES ARE PURPLE?" "yes" "THEYRE STUNNING sorry IM NOT" "? thank you?"

i just want to say toritsuka's crazy for saiki and even crazier for saiki without his glasses or just when toritsuka can see his purple eyes like