It’s Completely Acceptable To Stay Alive For Tiny Reasons. Because You Want To Hear Your Favorite Song

“Cause we said no strings attached and I still got tied up in that”

— Drake /// The Motion

““I love you, but you just make me so sad.” She whispered quietly enough to not wake him. “And I so badly want to go back to the way things were, but every time I look at you now I feel little edges of my heart cracking apart.” She kisses his chest with the next words, “I love you, but I have to love myself now.””

—

“I just want to hold his hand while he’s driving. I want to scream along with him to the words of our favourite songs. I want the early morning kisses, and the goodnight ones, too. I want to wrap my arms around him when he’s sad, and I want to fall asleep on his chest. I want to make him breakfast and bite his lip and ruffle his hair. I want to cuddle up with him on the couch and watch our favourite movies. I want to lay in bed with him after a whole night of pillow talk. I want him when he’s sad, when he’s happy, when he’s angry, when he’s nervous… I want to make this boy the happiest he’s ever been. I just want to be his girl.”

— i want to be with him (np // january 1, 2019)

+20lbs and no relapses in 11 months. Bye bye anorexia, you’re canceled. 💅❤

“you don’t know how much you really love the boy. not until you have to make him meet you mother. the prangs of worry that make you shiver and the negative thoughts that make you anxious make you realise, oh shit i really want mom to like him. how much your mom’s approval about him means to me. and it’s then you understand how much you love him. how badly you want to end up with him. how you are unconsciously yet madly in love with his soft black curls and devilish smile.”

— I didn’t know i loved you as much as I did, at-least not until you had to meet my mom//nikitaguptaa

Friend break up...

Friend break ups are worse than breaking up with someone that you were in a relationship with. This break up was like you are all ok one day and then there becomes this tension between the 2 of you, and then the other party just stops talking and becomes savage towards you. And so they eventually stop talking and it just kind of takes that part of your heart and makes it like it never existed in the first place. You know exactly why you ache, but also know that there will be no way of getting that piece of your heart back. Those are the worst kind of break ups.

“I wish I knew the right words to say when it came down to writing about someone who makes you feel like flowers are growing inside of your chest. I wish I knew how to explain the way you make me feel when it’s two in the morning and we’re both laughing over something that probably wasn’t even that funny but to other people, our laughs make it seem like it was the world. I wish I knew how to tell people just how really beautiful you are, because when you are there, whether you’re laying down or pacing back and fourth, talking about the things that excite you the most, or just about anything in general that makes you happy, your eyes hold a certain kind of light beneath them that makes me want to never look away. Or when you laugh, my god, when you laugh, I never want it to stop because you do this thing where you tilt your head back and cover your mouth at the last moment after you already been so loud, shaking your head and every single time, I’d think, I wouldn’t mind hearing you laugh for the rest of my life. And when you yell, which is very rare, is scary because you can be there, veins standing at attention and I’d still think you’re the most beautiful person I have ever laid eyes on, even if I’m driving you insane. Don’t worry though, you drive me insane too. And I wish I knew how to explain the way my hands shake when I think about losing you, or the way my chest tightens to the thought of you being with someone else who isn’t me, because it messes with my mind sometimes and I get fustrated, because only I want to know your favorite book to the way you hate wearing that poka dot shirt, or how you eat when you’re nervous and can’t seem to stop making a mess. But you always been a messy eater so I don’t mind. I fell in love with you and although you are not perfect because you do have your moments, I promise I will love you again and again and again because I am not perfect either but if I am here, holding my heart out to you, and you are there, doing the same, I swear we both can be non-perfect messes together. And I’m trying not to be too cheesy here, because you always did say I buttered you up too much so for now I’ll leave it off with an I love you and an I’ll love you forever until my very last breath and an I am so lucky you decided to choose me.”

— A.M// to jake, maybe loving you isn’t so bad after all.

Can we please stop associating being a good person with how much you're willing to suffer in silence for other people? You can be a kind person and still say "no, I don't have the time/energy to help you with that." You can be a kind person and still say "this makes me uncomfortable, please stop." You can be a kind person and still say "I disagree and here's why." You can be kind and still say "I'm not okay with this." Being kind is about treating people with kindness and respect, not about being the human equivalent of a doormat!

the most horrifying thing to hear as a person who has suffered abuse from their parents, is when people say that you resemble one of them.

i hate looking in the mirror and seeing my dads facial features. so much that i am saving up for plastic surgery, because i can only be beautiful, once people see no resemblance between my abuser and me.

i know i was treated wrongly. hell, every trait about me is a product of abuse. the way i cry when i get yelled at, no matter who it is or the situation. how i see myself as worthless, despite my achievements and talents. how i tear up and hyperventilate when im frustrated and how my anger is becoming uncontrollable, and im scared to have kids because what if i become just like my parents? and despite all that i always think. it could be worse. this is not abuse. im just dramatic. nothings wrong