The Greatest Skill A Woman Can Learn For Herself Is Self Reliance

the greatest skill a woman can learn for herself is self reliance

After you read a life-changing, heart-wrenching, awe-inspiring book and you go back to the real world

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lily-sam

6 years ago

College tips

I’m in college, no surprise there. I’ve had many experiences already in my 2 years of college. Let’s just say, chaos likes to follow me. I’ve passed, failed, been to the hospital, gotten on a first name basis with the dean, almost got backer acted, all that good stuff. So I have quite a few tips between balancing school and two jobs, recovering from failing, how to pass, when to call a class quits, etc. Some of these you may think I’m crazy for and that’s ok. Some like just giving up on a class or two may sounds stupid but believe me, when you work two jobs, are almost hospitalized, have family on the verge of death, one already dead, living an hour from school, and relying on a car that likes to work most of the time, there will be times you need to just quit. These tips may not be for everyone, but I’m sure that at least one of these could help you.

Find a sleeping schedule that works for you. Once you do, fit your classes around it, and work around your school. Trust me, if you put sleep second, you will never sleep enough and you’ll half ass all your classes.

Not only try to avoid 8AM’s, try to avoid classes that end at 9-10PM. I always here people advise against 8am classes, but never heard anyone advise against these. As a female getting out that late and walking to your car or dorm can be very scary especially on a college campus and that’s for good reason. It’s just not safe. Not to mention, you’ll get back to your place of sleeping and not be tired enough to sleep and probably won’t go to bed until around midnight at the earliest. Then cue next morning hatred for signing up for that class. Trust me, these classes are just as bad as 8ams

If the police want to talk to you, be honest and polite. The more polite you are, the gentler they will be and the less likely they are to threaten to arrest you as an accomplice or something. Just be honest and polite, but never compromise your rights. Ask for a lawyer but do so politely if it comes down to it. They hate talking to you just as much as you hate talking to them

Go ahead and hook up, but make sure your roommate(s) are fine with it and make sure to use protection. Don’t rely on plan B

Never let your drink leave your sight. Always keep it in hand and close to the front of your torso. Pass on the food at parties too unless you see it get delivered, opened, and served. People love getting people high and giving them drugs without their knowledge and consent as a prank

If you know you’re going to a place with alcohol, bring at least one friend you can completely trust even if you don’t think you’re going to drink

Don’t let someone talk you up and don’t fuck someone because you feel guilty

Make time to study. Put it in your calendar and don’t make plans for those times. Believe me, you’ll be so happy you did

Take notes in whatever way works for you. Study however and wherever works for you. Don’t be fooled into thinking there’s a correct way to succeed in academia. The only correct way is the way that works for you. Music? No music? Outside? Flashcards? In your bed? Whatever works my dude

Make your bed when you first get up. It will make your room appear more put together and if you do nothing all day besides that, at least you can tell yourself that you did do something worthwhile that day

If you’re sick, go to the clinic. Most campuses have free clinics where you can go and get seen for free or really cheap if you’re a student. Don’t suffer and be miserable

If you’re sad, cry. Be dramatic. Turn on the shower and start showering and then slowly slide down the wall as you breakdown hysterical over that breakup and just let the water gently flow over your skin as your tears blend with the drops spiraling down the drain. Trust me, you’ll come out feeling so much better while also wanting to die. But you’ll have more confidence and an easier time than you would if you tried to play it off like it didn’t bother you

Do stupid, harmless things like confess to your crush or tell that girl you think her hair is gorgeous. Go for a walk in the park and go out to your favorite restaurant alone. Buy the cheapest bottle of wine and drink it while watching a Disney movie. Live. Feel the rain fall and the sunlight wrap you. Feel the wind flow around you and the snow cover you. Feel the shadows cast down from the clouds and the ground beneath your feet. Pick that dandelion and make a wish or two or twenty. You could walk around in nothing but a snuggie and flip flops while drinking a piña colada from a coffee mug that says “fuck you” on it and I can guarantee you at least one person will think you’re a genius

Actually talk to your roommate(s) because you’ll be living with them for a while. Try to be on their good side. And if you really don’t like them, befriend your RA and bitch about him/her to them

Go bake something at 2AM

If you’re drinking and begin to feel buzzed, stop. The alcohol will hit you even more as the night goes on. No one does anything they want to talk about while shit-faced. Every drunk person becomes the person everyone laughs at and talks about for days. Save yourself the embarrassment and stop with a buzz. And besides it’s much better than a hangover

If you’re failing a class and you have no hope in reviving your grade, then don’t be afraid to drop it or just stop trying. In my chem 2 lecture, all three tests I took so far I got below a 65 on. I need a 72 to pass. There’s no way I would pass the class and I can’t drop it so I stopped going and studying and worrying about it. There’s no reason I should sacrifice efforts on a lost cause when I could put that energy to another class and excell in it.

Actually talk with your teachers. They control your grade, might as well get to know them and be on their good side. And trust me, not only will your grades be better, they may come in use later on

Don’t try to fix anyone. People have their problems and their own lives. You won’t fix anyone and you’ll just hurt yourself in the process

Be kind to people. If they piss you off, be even nicer to them. Trust me, it will be great watching them fume but not be able to do anything because you’re so nice and sweet and everyone loves you

Learn to cook real meals like chicken parmesan, shrimp alfredo, good chili, etc. They’re all really pretty simple with a little bit of practice and after a while, you’ll be able to make a delicious meal out of almost anything you find in your cabinets. I learnt how to cook at a young age and now if you just threw a bunch of random ingredients and some spices at me, I could definitely make due. This has come in handy so many times when all I have to eat is some pasta, a loaf of bread, chicken strips, and maybe a vegetable at the bottom of the fridge. I can work with that and not hate what I eat

Get off your parent’s taxes and get your own insurance

Go to the gym at least once. Even if it’s just to look

Try out some new hobbies like kayaking, painting, hiking, baking, witchcraft, writing, photography, cooking, sewing, etc. Many of these things will be useful

Learn at least one survival skill. Sewing, making bread from acorns, fishing, building a flotation device, whatever. It’ll make you look cool and like you have this whole life thing figured out

Keep your gas receipts and all receipts really

Spend cash

Learn about yourself

Record lectures when you can’t focus or don’t want to take notes

Avoid the tattoo parlor between the hours of 8pm and 10am to avoid a future regret

Talk to the people who no one else does. Befriend the outcasts. But if they do things you’re uncomfortable with, you can just as easily walk away

Don’t hang out with the person who gets drunk every weekend and smokes weed to get high and acts like college is a party every day. They usually get caught at least once or do something stupid that brings you down

Go to the beach at night when no one is around and the stars are out. Be safe though

If you don’t want to do something, don’t. You owe no one an explanation. They should respect your no and if they don’t, you don’t need them around

Don’t let someone get handsy with you just because they’re drunk. Tell them no if it makes you uncomfortable. Walk away

You are in school, your grades are important, but they’re not the end all be all

Start learning how to rely on yourself and yourself only

Avoid fights. They’re not cool and can land you in jail

People almost always have a motive

Spend time with your family and friends. The older you get, the older they get and the more likely they are to die. You never want to hate yourself for not spending time with someone

You are not to blame for someone else’s actions

You are responsible only for yourself and your actions. But don’t let that be an excuse to let someone else do something stupid

Take at least one afternoon every week to just have fun and pretend work and school doesn’t exist and you live in a perfect world

No one is perfect. Everyone fucks up. A lot. But it’s ok to cut people out of your life who fuck up. Never feel guilty for it

It’s ok to be picky

Don’t trust what people tell you. Fact check. Everything

Wash a dish after you use it and put stuff away when you’re done with it. Taking an extra 5 seconds will save you hours of stress and hate later

Turn your phone on do not disturb or on silent when studying for something important that you need to focus on

Take thousands of pictures of everything

Try to laugh every day

Do your homework even if you know the teacher won’t collect it

Constantly review past sections if you know the final will be cumulative

Keep your silibus for each class

Learn people’s stories. Not just the exciting ones. Learn about how their mother would wake them in the mornings as a kid. Learn about the silly stories they have. Learn about their scars, both happy and sad

Take care of your skin, teeth, hair, and brain

Change diets for a day

Find something that really excites you in every class you take

For everything you hate about yourself, find at least something you somewhat like about yourself

Happiness is just as much a mental thing as sadness. Find things that make you happy. Like the color orange or rain drops on leaves

Wear what ever the fuck you want. No one will care

Go to your classes even if attendance is not mandatory unless you could teach that lesson to everyone else in the class with 98% accuracy

Do things that make you happy and healthy

Make friends with people in your classes

You don’t need to be involved in 5 different clubs

You’ll only have a couple good friends and maybe one real friend if you’re lucky

Get to know someone who has a pet

Learn to respect yourself and your wants

You aren’t your parents or anyone else and you won’t have the life anyone else has

It’s ok to need a break sometimes. Just don’t give up

You are loved despite what that annoying brain of yours says. You are wanted and your friends care about you. And I do too

You matter just as much as anyone else does and if you’re struggling at all, you deserve help just as much as anyone else

You have a voice and a say. Use them wisely

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lily-sam

6 years ago

Vocab List: Meeting your idol

To say in real life

안녕하세요- Hello/Hi

신곡 너무 너무 좋아요- I really really like your new song

좋은 하루 되세요- Have a great day

너무 잘생겨서 심장이 아파요- You’re so handsome my heart hurts

진짜 너무 이뻐요- You’re so (freakin) pretty

진짜 너무 잘생겼어요- You’re so (freakin) handsome

이번 컴백 보고 울뻔했어요- I nearly cried from this comeback

좋은 음악 만들어줘서 고마워요- Thank you for making amazing music

꿈 같아요- It’s like a dream

팬 미팅 처음이에요- It’s my first time at a fan meet

사진에서도 이쁜데/잘생겼는데 실물은 더 이뻐요/잘생겼어요- You look so pretty/handsome in photos but even more pretty/handsome in real life

너무 떨려요- I’m so nervous

못보겠어요- I can’t look at you (because you’re too shy/nervous)

To say over text (e.g. Twitter)

수고하셨습니다/수고했어요- You worked hard today

푹 쉬세요- Go rest

끼니 꼭 챙겨 드세요- Don’t miss your meals

오늘도 화이팅- hwaiting/fighting (a way to encourage someone)

맛있는 거 많이 먹어요- Eat loads of tasty food

아프지 마세요- Don’t be sick

1위 축하해요- Congratulations for 1st place

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lily-sam

6 years ago

26/100 days of productivity. 20th May 2019.

Completed my homework.

Cleaned my room.

Did some Spanish flashcards on quizlet.

I swear i would kill for sleep😭. As always hope you all had a productive and happy day and if you didn't that's okay you always have tomorrow! ^.^

BTS - Fake Love.

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lily-sam

6 years ago

hi luv!! I notice you do a lot of pilates with blogilates! I love her sm lol she’s amazing but I was wondering,, do you have any fav videos of hers that you do regularly/more often than others? I love the 100 challenges that she does and a couple of other videos but I wanted to know which ones you like the most !!

hi angel!! eee i’m so glad so many of you seem to love cassey too, she’s great ✨ here are the videos i always go back to:

thighs

i really really like you squat challenge

plie squat challenge

shape of you(r thighs) squat challenge

call me maybe squat challenge

20 minute inner thigh isolation workout

5 moves to target inner thighs

obliques

extreme obliques workout

quick burn obliques workout

candle stick dippers workout

another quick burn obliques workout

back

backless bride workout

ultimate back workout

3 minute quick back workout

backless dress workout

arms

20 minute arm isolate

quick burn tricep workout

quick burn arm workout

bridal bootcamp arm workout

6 minute arm workout

pop pilates arm workout for beginners

abs (for abs, i typically just make up my own routine vs following videos, but i like these ones!!)

pop pilates ab workout for beginners

lower ab isolation exercises

abs and obliques workout

for cardio, i tend to just do piit workouts!! i typically only do this one but i’ve done this one a few times as well and i liked/hated it (hated bc it was painful and i felt like dying the entire time lmao)

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lily-sam

7 years ago

2018

- wake up with your alarm. don’t lie there for another half an hour. seize the day

- have a glass of water as soon as you wake up and before you go to sleep. hydrate

- stretch. do some yoga. try and do the splits or even just touch your toes. relax and meditate and focus on your breathing

- even if you’re not going out, change your clothes and your underwear. clean is always better

- go for run. or a walk. or to the gym. even just once a week. just get outside

- read a little everyday. maybe for leisure or maybe for class. just learn

- new music is always lush. spotify, apple music, a live gig. go hear someone’s heart

- cut things out that make you unhappy. people, relationships, certain foods, habits, anything

- study hard. work hard. get it. the job, the degree, the relationship. just do it for you

- check your boobs everyday. make doctors appointments

- eat a piece of fruit and veg everyday. we all know 5 a day is far fetched, especially for students

- compliment people. you never know how much someone needs to hear something positive

- compliment yourself. look at yourself in the mirror and say five things you like and maybe one to improve. you can always better yourself but don’t make that your be all and end all

- a relationship should never be your everything. it’s lush to be smitten and to have someone smitten with you but be sure not to become half a person. you are a whole. reclaim your independence. learn to love your solitude

- don’t forget your friends. keep in touch with people. don’t be glued to your phone but make sure you stay in contact

- give yourself time to heal. grief is a weird thing and time isn’t always the healer. you’ll have good days and bad days and you should never feel bad for crying. it’s not over and you don’t have to move on in the way people think you should. memories are good things

- don’t put so much pressure on yourself. eat that pizza. buy that charity shop coat. there’ll always be money and there’s always tomorrow to eat a salad. calm down

- stress is the silent killer. you don’t need that first degree or that promotion. do your best and you’ll be rewarded

- say fuck it once in a while. or a lot. a couple of g&ts, a party, a new outfit

- have sex or don’t have sex. it’s a lot of fun when your needs are met and you’re enjoying yourself with someone you love or just like the look of

- withdraw consent if you get uncomfortable. at the beginning, middle, end, it’s always okay. don’t let social expectations dictate your choices. the idea of being a slut doesn’t exist unless you’re hurting someone you’ve made monogamous promises to. other than that you’re good

- get checked and be good to your body. sex is great if your mind and body are good with it too

- take photos. paint. write in a journal. document your life. you never know when you’ll need some nostalgia or a creative outlet

- families aren’t perfect but they’ll always be in your life in some way. in person or in your heart and memory. try to make them good memories. there are those without parents and siblings and grandparents who would give anything to have what you have. try a little. take the higher ground

- mental health is important. cut out anything that could contribute to its downfall. your mind’s long life is more important than temporary fixes

- listen to the people close to you. most of the time they have your best interests at heart and they’re trying to help you see what maybe you can’t. don’t take things so personally

- we’re living in a time of hate. be a ray of sunshine to this dark world. don’t seclude yourself to your own cave. that isn’t what self love is. we need to take care of ourselves first, yes, but remember to love each other too

- take one day at a time

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lily-sam

7 years ago

Its such a sad thing that this is true...