Blakemadden​:

can you die from lack of affection? Asking for myself

complain, complain, and complain is all leo wanted to do right at this very moment. he found solace complaining over his life with a glass in his hand at his favorite spot on the ninth. ah, he was waiting for the sweet relief that would come to sliding himself in his seat with his usual order waiting for him. but today’s extra curricular activities just had to wait. he had a new client that absolutely had to be seen today. 

all he could do was clench his jaw as he fought the desire to abandon the empty class room that was dubbed as his office today. his foot began tapping away as he sat inncorrectly on a student’s desk. his behind was perched on the headrest and his feet flat on the seat. he was hunched over, lost in the vision of elsewhere, till a quiet scuffle made him turn around. 

leo sighed, seeing the combination of big blue eyes and blonde hair.  another pretty young thing to surpass him in life. fantastic, he grumbled in his head. he cleared his throat before greeting her, his voice coming out warmer than his own thoughts. “Hey there, are you,” he turned to grab the resume that was on the desk. lifting up the page as he turned back towards her, he questioned, “Deliah Roche?”  @itsdelilahroche​

why do we like to hurt so much?

i be like “idc” and then stare at the wall for hours with alternative sad music playing in the background thinking about how i ruin every good thing that comes my way

xbhandri​:

I can’t do this. I shouldn’t do this. I wouldn’t. Xavier just sat there and listened as Leo gave a million and one reasons as to why he shouldn’t audition. He let him go on, but really, he didn’t know why. No matter what Leo said, he had an answer for. He wasn’t going to let his friend back out of this. And besides, maybe if he felt so strongly, he didn’t have to audition for Roger. Just being backup in RENT was something, right?

“Leo… There is no future… There is no past. Thank God this moments not the last,” he started to sing. He couldn’t really turn this down, right? What was RENT if not a way to say #yolo in an epidemic. You still have time, don’t waste it. “There’s only us, there’s only this, forget regret, or life is yours to miss,” he stood up from his seat to move closer to Leo. “No other to road, no other way, no day but today.”

Xavier took Leo’s face in his hands to look him in the eye. “I can’t control my destiny. I trust my soul. Will you wake tomorrow from this nightmare? We won’t fucking know until you do it. There’s only now, there’s only here. Give in to love, or live in fear. No other path, no other way. No day but today.”

-

Leo parted his lips out of awe but this time just stretched into a knowing smile. Of course Xavier would know exactly how to fan the flames of his heart. His best friend was just as eccentric and playful as he was, but somehow, Xavier knew how to stunningly straddle the line between being too much and not enough. He watched him sing the beautiful words written by Jonathan Larson. Leo’s mind began accompanying his voice with the instrumentals he knew by memory. The music and lyrics made the intention of Xavier’s performance grow. Leo really should at least try. Because if not today, when? No day but today. 

He looked down for a moment, only to feel hands on his face, and at this he had to smile again. He immediately looked back into Xav’s gaze, letting his friend caress his face as he sang RENT to him. If anyone were to walk in right now, they wouldn’t get it, and that is so them. His heart was appreciative at the effort to change his mind. His thoughts began to sink onto the possibility of just trying out. He was silent for one moment. Then he exhaled slowly, “Forget regret, right?” 

renfarber​:

.

He sounded genuine enough. And he certainly looked like he meant what he was saying. But she couldn’t shake the knowledge that his wife had probably also believed him when he spoke to her like this. Not to mention, she’d seen him yell at Blake and punch a wall mere minutes before looking at her like she was a gift from God. So she remained skeptical, looking at him through narrowed eyes.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” she said bluntly, climbing the steps and getting her keys out of her pocket. “…But I know that we have to.” She hesitated, with the keys in her hand. Inviting him in seemed so… maybe intimate wasn’t the right word, but it was all she could think. This was her home. Her safe place for Max. Leo felt like a stranger now, did she really want to let him in? “I was going to order a pizza. You still pile everything on yours like a crazy person?”

-

Leo nearly held his breath as he watched her face. It was like he was memorizing it just incase. He felt his stomach tense at her blunt words. He deserved that. He deserved worse. Her next words caused him to finally take a full breath. But then he stared at her, not realizing he had gone from being shut out to being asked if his pizza order was the same. "Erm,” he made a disgruntled noise that he pulled off to be one of offense than confusion. “Supreme pizza is not crazy. It’s genius.” He said quite stubbornly. He obviously believed wanting everything wasn’t a crime, though that logic only worked best with pizza. “Does that mean I’m invited to your pizza party...?” He asked, his eyes darting to her door and then to her. He had to admit this was much more than he was expecting. 

“The Devil is real. And he’s not a little red man with horns and a tail. He can be beautiful. ‘Cause he’s a fallen angel, and he used to be God’s favorite.”

— American Horror Story, Season 1  (via intractably)

annalisechambersx​:​

Annie really felt like she was living her best life in New York. Sure, she missed home and she missed her family, but New York just felt like the place for her. She loved her job, she loved her friends, she loved the day life and she really loved the night life. There was just something about walking around New York at night and seeing all the lights mixed with the hustle and bustle. It was exactly what she wanted.

A couple nights a week, after work, she would head out to a bar, just wanting to unwind a little and maybe meet some new people. She had no fear when it came to speaking to people. Which, really, was a dangerous thing considering she could very well get hurt doing that…but it hadn’t happened yet. So she was feeling confident it wouldn’t. Probably. When Annie approached the bar, the barmaid smiled warmly at her and got to work on her favorite drink, the Cosmopolitan. After a minute or so, she was passed the drink and a straw, and she was moving through the bar, her chocolate hues dancing around.

She just hung around for a bit, sipping idly on her drink when she spotted a man that appeared to be alone. That was sad. Annie didn’t like seeing that. She didn’t mind being alone. She believed that she was meant to be. But that wasn’t the case for everyone else. With her signature smile on her face, she crossed the room and the approached the man, her curls bouncing as she did so, “Have you ever had their wings here?” She asked, a little randomly, “I’m not much for chicken wings. But there’s something about them here.” She giggled quietly and shrugged, “Actually most of their food is pretty good now that I think about it…”

-

Fucking-tourist-implant, a sputter of thoughts left his head as he passed by some dude in a spankin new I Heart NY t-shirt. He didn’t know why that had bothered him too much on this particular evening. But as he got older, he grew to see just how crowded this edge of the east coast was. Yeah, that’s what it was, the city was becoming too saturated. his mood wasn’t sour because his mouth was dry, he told himself. he always downplayed how much he needed his vice even lying to himself. but he couldn’t lie that the world became a bit nicer when he sat in that stool with the cold sweat of his drink at his fingertips. 

it sipped slowly now, savoring how the taste had rose the hairs on neck and gave him the feeling of goosebumps. he was at his usual bar, truly in his own element tonight. he liked the people watching, the food for a bar was decent, and the bartender was great company when available. he was fine just as he was, just another typical night. 

“Uh—erm,” leo cleared his throat of his initial surprise. people didn’t usually approach him because he was always scowling. he could have sworn he had the same look he always did. but now he was surprised, meeting brown eyes far warmer than his own could ever be. he paused, wondering if he should even reply to this stranger’s sudden presence. he could easily let out a big gruff and walk off. but this was his spot. his brow quirked when she spoke about the other food items as if she had them. he, of course, had sampled the whole menu once. 

“Order what you want.” He shrugged then pinched his glass in his dominant hand. his gaze on the stranger was still cautious. his expression was not friendly nor rude. “But yeah, the food’s pretty good.”

blakemadden​:

Behind a table she’d be safe, that was what Blake was telling herself as she sat there waiting for Leo to arrive at the cafe. God knows what had possessed her to suggest the two of them meet up when she was visibly pregnant by this point, yet she had done it. Even in the oversized sweater she was currently wearing - if anything it’s size was making this worse.

Before she could bail entirely on the coffee altogether a familiar figure walked through the doors with his familiar brooding air about him. As if he was on some kind of mission which was a little scary, but it didn’t last long, and when the first thing he said was a compliment she smiled sweetly. Unable to get up to give him a hug hello it was the best she could do. “Thanks, so do you. Do you want to…” she only got half way through her sentence and it was like Leo had read her mind, sitting down before she could finish. Glancing at her phone she saw it only said 12:03pm. He was hardly late. “No, no not at all I just finished a cake a little earlier than I thought I would so I thought the walk down here would do me good instead of getting on the subway. It gets so stuffy down there I swear, it’s like the whole city has gotten hotter.” Or was it that she was more sensitive to heat. Probably the latter. He looked so handsome as he sat there in front of her. Chiseled. No wonder his wife hadn’t managed to stand in the way of her attraction to him for long despite thinking she was a pretty morally sound person. “I just thought that maybe we should like…clear the air. You know? In a friendship way.” Plus she wasn’t sure yet if she was going to tell him about the baby, likely not, so she could hardly cite that as the reason for inviting him here. “How have you been?” 

-

Leo brought his gaze back to her when she said the time. His own time read two minutes ahead. He had nodded, listening to why she appeared so comfortable in her seat. She had time to relax in the booth. But did she have to look so warm and inviting? The color in her cheeks reminded him of how she looked after he had-- his mind was suddenly taken back to reality as she spoke up again.

“In a friendship way?” He repeated with a small laugh, a twinge of bitterness at the end. “That sounds like a new way for us,” He observed dropping his gaze but his face stayed toward her. “But if that’s what you want, by all means.” He agreed, bringing his eyes back to her face. His elbows moved on to the table and his arms crossed in front of him. His chin rested on the back of his hand. A physical defense his body had created as he reminded of her rejection. He knew he had to let their affair devolve if he wanted to keep her in his life. After all, their entanglement had gone undetected by Leo’s wife, and that’s all he could hope for. Losing his physical intimacy with Blake was the price to pay for it. And wife learning the truth about him is never an option.

 Her question to how he’d been made him think of his latest paramour, Ana. He had started his affair with her shortly after Blake ended things. He kept his face straight and blinked, “Been busy...” He said, unsure if he should even share just whom had been keeping him active. He idly wondered if it was upset her that he had found another heart to pull the strings upon. Replacing her, so to speak. “...with classes, a lot of students are getting cast so, of course they need more of me.” He continued.