The 2020\2021 School Year

why do the mobsters in mafia films always do the crime during the night like it’s called organised crime you would think that they would be a little more organised  about their sleep schedules 

masks are going to be very good for ventriloquists

we only have orange flavour chocolate the apocalypse is soon

me 

i have beven motivated to make a list of the crimes of santa claus. no i will not say why

-promotes toxic masculinity (you better not cry)

-stalking (he sees you when you're sleeping. that's pretty creepy ngl)

-the most common: breaking and entering

-does he pay his elves??? do they have a choice??

-probably doesn't have a license for drivung reindeer

-stealing (takes cookies and carrots. that's very rude)

-forced reindeer to work for like two days nonstop

-favoritism (gives some kids coal and others presents. very rude. it ain't none of your business mr claus)

-doesn't pay rent to live in a whole ass continent. seriously man, you're probably rich, pay your share

-surprising people without permission

-keeping secrets

-not showing his identity (if you know my address & stalk me i deserve to see you)

-forcing people to cheat (i saw my mom kissing santa n. if he stalks people, he def knows she was married)

-on that note, pedophilia (that mom probably wasn't over a hundred years old or sum)

-he also cheated on HIS wife with that mom. why did i like this guy as a kid

-stealing children for help (literally any christmas movie, and you see him kidnapping)

-deception (literally anything he ever does)

-he probably also steals a lot of stuff from us earthlings. where else does he get all that stuff. mans in the north pole

-breaking promises (says he'll get you something for christmas but doesn't)

-probably magics the mailmen. how else do they know where he lives

-forcing those mailmen to go to the north pole coz he was too lazy to come get them. they probably missed dinner too

-reblog with more

one time a kid in my German class jumped over a table to fight someone and didn’t even end up fighting them 

i want to craft a new Identity for myself and move to a large city. 

i want to ru n through a field and scream ngl 

put ur hands up if you’re in a new national lockdown worse than last march bc ur pm is an incompetent cunt 🙋🏼‍♀️

Do my friends know that I would die for them or do I have to tell them

were any of us raised to trust politicians  though,