Hide And Seek | Steve Rogers ; 2

hide and seek | steve rogers ; 2

summary | After seeing Peggy in the 70s and everything that happened, distance began to grow between you and Steve.

words | 2.4k+

genres | angst, tiny fluff

pairing | endgame!steve rogers x avenger!reader

warnings | endgame spoilers, death

note | THE SECOND PART IS FINALLY HERE! I planned to keep this one in drafts at first since I didn't really expect requests for a second part 🤣 But here it is now! Thank you so much for reading the first one. I appreciate everyone's feedback and reblogs 🤍🤍 Enjoy reading!

masterlist | first part | third part

“Y/N, doll.”

Steve called your name since he wants to talk to you as soon as possible before anything happens again. You turned around, instantly meeting his eyes. He cannot read anything from yours as they remained empty but your jaw clenched. He can say that you are still stopping yourself from voicing anything about what happened in Peggy’s office. Steve was about to say something again when Bruce spoke, making you two turn around.

“Clint, where’s Nat?”

Bruce, you, and Steve wait for Clint’s answer. But the archer avoided your eyes and you held your breath. You tried to remain positive with your thoughts. Maybe Natasha had to do something alone–

“She’s gone.”

Your heart dropped straight to your stomach. Unconsciously, you held on to Steve’s arm, making him look at you with worry written all over his face. He sees tears instantly threatening your eyes. 

“What? What do you mean she’s gone?” Bruce broke off the silence with his denial.

The others caught up upon Clint’s alone arrival that they asked questions too. Clint, who was already devastated, had to tell everyone what he and Natasha had to do to get the stone. He told how they fought to die for it, trying not to break down into pieces in between sentences.

Tony was the one who asked everyone to take some time off and mourn near the lake. Steve held you as you two walked to your shared room in the compound. The green uniform from the 70s that he was still wearing ended up damp on the chest part. He consoles you, rubbing your back up and down while placing kisses on your hair. When you entered your room, your boyfriend lets you sit on the corner of your kingsized bed while he picks on clothes for your both to change on before going to the lakeside.

“I-I’m not going,” you whispered when he placed your clothes on the bed next to you.

Steve cocked his head to you. He was already dressed up. You were still crying but calmer now. You did not even look at him when you continued,

“You should go. I just need to be alone.”

As much as he wants to stay with you, Steve knew that you needed it. Natasha was your best friend and sister– non-blood related – after you two worked together for SHIELD. Steve nods. He leaned down to your face level. You closed your eyes, tears streaming down. He gently held your cheek, wiping the continuously flowing tears with his thumb before placing a small kiss on your forehead. You whimpered before biting your lower lip, not letting yourself express more emotions. Steve tried to look past it as he gets up.

“I’ll be at the lake, okay?” he told you before leaving the room, feeling a little skeptical.

You fought and both your body and mind are beaten up.

You cried for everyone you lost, feeling Natasha’s presence as you stood next to your allies. You imagined standing side by side with her in this biggest battle of your life as an Avenger. 

You screamed until your throat hurts as you hit one enemy to another.

You shed tears when you saw Thor’s Mjolnir land on Steve’s hand. Maybe the tears came from joy, pride, or exhaustion. You don’t know. Your emotions are already all over the place. 

“Oh, shi–”

You were with Rocket Raccoon, shooting your blasters at every alien you see. You swore you were ready to die in the name of protecting everyone in this world. But you still felt goosebumps on your skin when you see an enormous alien approaching you. A Leviathan was ready to engulf you two in his giant mouth when suddenly it disintegrated into dust.

“What the hell happened?” he asked as he looked around.

You exhaled, tired, but it ended with a smile. “We did it. We won–”

The grin and relief on your face dropped when your eyes spotted Tony, half of his body wounded. No, no, no, no. The guns slipped from your hands as you ran in his direction. Your vision became all blurry with tears. The more it gets blurry, the slower you feel. It was like everything is happening in slow motion when you stopped moving and simply watched. You see Rhodey landing near his weak friend. Peter called his name over and over again and your heart was crushed into pieces. Pepper came. From the distance, you cannot hear anything Pepper told her husband. But to watch the couples’ solemn and last exchange, mashed whatever’s left in you. Both their hands are on his arc reactor and everyone witnessed Tony’s last breath when his palm fell. You looked around, and that’s when you noticed Steve standing next to Thor. His helmet was useless in hiding the devastated look on his face. You walked to him, approaching him with a soft touch on his back.

“Steve…” you called his name before biting your tongue to stop an incoming sob.

Your boyfriend turned around and without any wasted second, you welcomed him in your arms. No more words needed to say. Both you and Steve felt like a winner and a loser at the same time. You two teared up because of a million mixed emotions for everything you have done and went through for this moment. You knew you still have things to talk about and hopefully, you can have time to talk about it. 

But for now, a hug would be fine.

“Thank you, Steve.”

Pepper offered a warm smile after almost everyone who came for Tony’s funeral left. Steve helped in sending the guests off as Pepper already looked tired and still have to look after Morgan. Steve nods and gave her a polite smile.

“You and Y/N should rest now too. I can manage here. Happy will help me clean up here.” she told him.

“Just don’t hesitate to give us a call if you and Morgan need anything,” he replied before they shared a short hug.

After that, Steve searched for you around the cabin. He has been worried for you as you seemed unemotional beside him earlier. You only had your arms crossed as you stared at the arc reaction flowing on the lake. Finally, he saw you near the lake, talking with Clint and Wanda. He walked to you.

“Doll, let’s go?”

You turned around and nods at him before turning back to your friends again. You hugged Clint once again and so is Wanda. 

“You can come to our house, okay?” 

You whispered to the Sokovian. Unlike Clint who has a family, Wanda is all alone and you wanted to ensure her that you and Steve are always open to welcoming her into your abode. 

“Aren’t we going to help Pepper with cleaning up?” you asked Steve while you two walk to the car.

Your boyfriend shakes his head, “Happy will stay here for a while to help her. She wants us to rest for now.”

Throughout the whole ride, you had your attention on nature outside your window. You asked Steve to roll it down because you want to take in the fresh air. He took a quick side glance at you and had a small smile watching you enjoying the breeze. The Starks’ cabin is very much hidden from the city. It took almost an hour to get out of the woods and it gave him a vacant time to think about things. Specifically, you and your relationship. You have been pretty reserved and he did not want to force you into having dialogues with him promptly. He wants to be patient and wait, hoping that the speechlessness will pass.

In the meantime, he would deal with silence as you fell asleep on the passenger seat.

“I’m going to the shelter.”

You passed by Steve, who is brewing coffee in your kitchen. Wearing your casual clothes, you picked up your house and car keys from the foyer table.

“Do you want coffee, doll? Breakfast? I can make you a quick one–” Steve offered when you entered the kitchen.

“It’s fine.” you declined before planting a feather-like kiss on his cheek. It was too swift that he almost didn’t feel it.

Turns out it’s hard to find time to talk. Especially when one is always busy with other things. By one, Steve means you. It’s been weeks since the last battle. Tony had his funeral in his and his family’s lakeside cabin. Other Avengers was already branching out their own lives. Bruce stayed to build a new Quantum Tunnel for the stones to be returned after he rests his injured arm. You and Steve still did not talk about his last mission: returning the infinity stones. But he knows you knew about it since it was the original plan. Still, he wants to have a conversation with you.

But you became… distant. A day after the funeral, you went back to managing the orphanage you and Natasha co-founded for the kids of those who have been snapped. There were still kids left in your care and you try to reach and look for their returned parents in any way you can. You figured that maybe you can turn all your emotions and time to it.

He gulped before asking you again, “Can I visit you there later? Maybe we can have lunch together. We can eat out.” 

You paused and slowly turned at him. Steve waited for your answer but you only looked at him like you were thinking of reasons to get away from his invite. It was like a confirmation that you are, indeed, avoiding him. Steve tried to mask up his chagrin when he spoke again,

“It’s fine. You’re probably busy there, now that everyone’s back. Just let me know when you get to the shelter.” 

You replied a simple nod before turning your back again and leaving the house. During your whole solo drive to the shelter, you have this feeling of a tight knot in your stomach. You hated it. You had your knuckles gripping tight on the steering wheel. Like you wanted to go back home and stay with Steve. But you didn’t. 

You don’t know how long was the drive since you found yourself parking in front of the orphanage. One of your few staff greeted you with a wave when she spotted you inside your car. You waved back with a cheery smile. Only for it to drop when she continued watering the other plants around the home. You rested your forehead on the steering wheel, exhaling.

“Yeah, I’m not going tomorrow. Can you manage the facility?”

You talk with Anna, your staff, through a call since you’re already on your way home. The whole day in the shelter, you were distracted by your thoughts and Steve. You cannot stop feeling awful about rejecting Steve’s efforts that you decided to go home a little early than usual. You knew that you two needed to talk and maybe you can do it as soon as you can. So you were glad when Anna expressed that she can take lead.

“Thank you, Anna.” you dropped the call with a smile.

It will be a hassle to cook this late. So you thought pizza and beer would be good even though your boyfriend cannot get drunk. You tried to calm your nerves as you turned off your headlights when you reached home. You were quiet with opening the door with the box of pizza and canned beers.

“I’m returning the stones tomorrow. Bruce already rebuilt the machine.” 

You heard Steve’s deep voice just when you stepped into the house. You remained quiet with your gentle footsteps.

“Are you bringing the shield?” 

It was Bucky. You were not surprised that he’s here as he always visits. You just never meet across since you were always busy. You were slow in your moves, careful with everything you were holding. The two old pals are probably in the kitchen.

“No, I’m leaving it to Sam. You know that I am giving up the shield.” Steve replied.

Your eyebrows crunched together as you stay still near the door. He’s giving up the shield?! You know about the returning of the infinity stones. But you didn’t know that he had other plans. So you stayed behind the walls, listening to them.

“Yeah. But have you told Y/N? You can’t leave without telling her.”

Leave?! Your heart beats faster than ever. Is he really leaving?! You felt panging pain in you. Something like shredding your heart. You felt your lips quivering as you felt like seeing red. 

“Well… She–”

Your hands almost let go of whatever you holding. Thankfully, you quickly caught it. But it caused a rustling sound and you heard the chair moving from the kitchen. You figured you will just show yourself than be caught. You appeared in the kitchen entryway and you see the two soldiers surprised to see you.

“Oh, h-hey…” You forced a smile on your face, acting like you didn’t hear anything.

They knew you heard them as you appeared upset. Bucky looked at Steve. Without any verbal communication, they understood each other. Steve immediately walked to you but you handed him the beer and pizza. He noticed the way your hands formed into a stone fist when it was emptied. 

“You’re home early, doll,” he spoke.

You nod, “I am. I thought we can have pizza and maybe drink too. But you two seemed to have it already.”

You tried to joke as you pointed to the bottled drinks on the table.

“Oh, it’s fine. It’s our last one anyway.” Bucky smiled, trying to ride along your jolly persona too. “Actually, I’m going home. So you two can–”

“No! No! Stay.” you stopped him with stern stress on the last word. “I’m going up. I’ll probably rest. I… I suddenly felt a bad headache. You guys should have the pizza and beer.”

You turned your back, shutting off once again. Steve called your name but you simply shook your head. The two men watched your back as you left. They heard your heavy, slow footsteps on the wooden staircase.

“Go talk to her,” Bucky advised before getting a slice of pizza and patting Steve’s back.

Steve nods and quickly followed your trail. Bucky took himself out of the house. Just when you heard Steve stepping on the second floor, you locked the door in the guest room. That’s where you would be staying for tonight. Your boyfriend figured it out when he sees your shared room open door. He went straight to the other room, knocking on the door.

“Doll, Y/N…” he called out softly. He heard a muffled sob and he knew that you are crying not because of that sudden headache. It took a few more knocks and calls before you answered.

“Please, leave me alone, Steve.”

tags [for everyone who asked for the second part! tysm <3]

@nana1000night @cevansssimp @celestialeviereads @watermelanie612 @vesta-ro @feestyles @epiphany-of-a-madwoman