Latest Posts by justateenworkinglifeout - Page 6

Worst dog name, go.

When the seating arrangement so bad you have to email the teacher during class

My cane arrives on Monday. Hopefully I can actually walk from class to class without dying now.

does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver

fanfiction truly being the savior for everyones sanity

Good trope: Character yelling, "It's not what it looks like!" while doing exactly what it looks like.

Great trope: Character yelling, "It's not what it looks like!" while doing something so unfathomable that the person who interrupted them can't even begin to attempt to figure out what the hell it is they're seeing.

And of course, Nico, being from the 1930s, has no idea what they mean and just watches in confusion as they get tackled by the monster that was on their left, before running over and killing it.

*While the 7 + Nico is in a battle*

Nico, trying to warn about the location of an enemy: To the left!

Leo: Take it back now y'all!

Percy: One hop this time!

I put together an audience to watch me practicing my audition song for the school musical. They're very kind and non-judgemental. Except the one standing next to the computer. He bit me.

He had to live off just his clothes and a sword for most of his memorable life, so the second he gets a permanent place to live and a stable environment, he goes out of his way to fill his space with cool things that make him happy since he now is able to have things with no function or use other than just being cool and fun. Nico Di Angelo would totally be a maximalist, and he takes regular trips to the city with Will just to visit a bunch of thrift stores and antique shops. There is no shelf or table in the Hades cabin that does not have some sort of statue, picture, bone, or book on it.

headcanon that nico di angelo is actually very maximalist, and the hades cabin soon looks like an old antique store

canonical

i want to- *remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health* kill someone else

There is nothing more powerful and with less disregard to their own well-being than a girl trying to finish a crochet project on a time crunch

I'm super unwell, but I have to go to school tomorrow. I'm already behind on the small amount of work we've done this semester so far.

My legs feel like they're being torn apart from the inside, my head aches, I'm nauseous, fatigued, and really lightheaded and dizzy.

But I can't start accumulating absences or skipping assignments. So I gotta deal. Why must my body torture me?

Confessions from an emotional abuse victim:

#3 Real friendship

Due to my abuse coming from someone who I considered my 'best friend', as opposed to a partner or family member, after I broke out of the cycle of abuse, I had troubles with friendship.

I had become pretty separate from my friends I had before him, and I never thought I would ever actually need someone other than him anymore, so I didn't really try very hard to have other friends. At the end of that friendship, I had just entered a new little friend group because of my boyfriend, and I was also in a musical where I had found three people I really vibed with. Two of them are still some of my closest friends to this day.

Regardless of my shaky little support system, I still had a lot of trouble navigating friendship. I'm autistic and had just gotten out of one and a half years of covid isolation before I dove into an abusive friendship, so my social skills were not very great. The only two roles I knew in a friendship were leader and follower. As I tried to navigate friendships that weren't meant to hurt someone, I found myself making people uncomfortable a lot. I didn't know what to do or say, and I would go between either being really self centered or obsessing over the other person. I would hurt people without realizing and I became pretty isolated.

I spent most of the one year after leaving my abuser like that. I desperately tried to reach out and get people to enjoy my presence, but nothing I did seemed to work. It didn't help that I had gotten a silent reputation the year before when I pushed people away and blindly followed and backed up someone who everyone else could tell was a complete dickhead.

The one person who stuck by my side was my best friend. She took me under her wing and taught me some of the ways that friendship was supposed to look. I still have the memory ingrained in my mind of the one day we were in her basement building things with Lego, and she referred to me as her 'bestie'. I nearly broke down crying. My abuser had weaponized that term against me near the end of our friendship, saying that he hated when I called him my best friend. Hearing her say that was one of the most blissful moments of my life.

The next year, I decided to go to a different high school than pretty much everyone else from my middle school, including all the people I was friends with. I felt that I needed a clean slate, but I didn't really give myself one. I tried making friends, but after feeling even the slightest amount of push back from anyone, I would retreat. This left me with some people I didn't vibe with that well, but wouldn't reject me.

I stayed like that for a while, and was slightly miserable. I'm still not sure how it happened, but eventually near the end of the school year, I found my people. My friends right now are absolutely amazing people. I still mess up a bit, but I'm finally learning how real friendship works.

Navigating non-toxic relationships can become really hard after being in an abusive situation. It takes years, and many screw ups, but it's possible to become a better person surrounded by good people. As I continue to try and improve myself, I find that more people want to be around me. Improvement is possible, and will bring so many amazing new things into your life.

Introduction Post

Hi! I'm Iris, I go by she/her pronouns.

I pretty much just created this blog for myself. It's a sort of 'scream out into the void and see if the void screams back' type thing.

From what I've been posting as of now, you can mostly just expect to see text posts about my perspective on life and my experiences, along with the occasional little piece of art or a fandom/meme reblog.

This is all just a sort of creative outlet, so I might be mentioning some heavy stuff about my life (gripes about the Healthcare system, my experiences with emotional abuse, general thoughts about the state of the world, that sort of stuff) so if you don't want to read that, this probably isn't the page for you.

My general interests include the Riordanverse and musical theatre, and that's basically it.

I feel the need to add something else to wrap up the post but I can't think of anything so I'm writing this filler so I can come back and edit when I think of a good ending (This might just be here forever)

*getting on an empty bus and sitting down in a seat at the front of the bus (reserved for disabled people) because my legs hurt and the other seats are harder to get in/out of*

Me: I feel so bad for using this seat, it's supposed to be for disabled people and I'm just hogging it so nobody else can use it who might need it.

...

Me: wait a second... I am disabled...

Confessions from an emotional abuse victim:

#2 Tough Love

Recently, I've been finding myself thinking about the concept of 'tough love'. That is one of the terms I used to describe the abuse and manipulation before I fully accepted that I had been abused. But the thing is, what he did was not love.

Love is not being judgemental. Love is not being brutally 'honest' about someone else's flaws because they should fix them.

Love is making sure someone is cared for even if they don't ask for it or are a bit apprehensive. Love is when my friend noticed I was acting a bit different and asked me when I last drank something. After I told her I didn't know, she told me I should drink something. I refused and said I was fine, but she still went and bought me a bottle of water and made me drink it in front of her.

I feel like the term 'tough love' isn't really a term that should be used in the first place though. Even though there are situations like that, where it seemingly fits the term and is actually okay, it's still a slippery slope into justifying abuse.

If people would point out that my abuser was being really harsh to me, I could say it was just because he cared. It was because he wanted me to improve as a person so I could do better. His punches and kicks and yelling and degrading were just his way of saying he cares. It's 'tough love'. This term helped catch me, and I'm sure many others as well, into the cycle of justifying the actions of my abuser. It let me believe it was my fault for feeling hurt from what he did.

I think it might be time to retire this concept. Yes, sometimes you need to be a little pushy to make sure someone you love is cared for, but even then, you still should be kind. Honestly, that doesn't need its own term. It's just being caring. We don't need any more ways for victims caught in the throes of abuse to try to justify it.

Confessions from an emotional abuse victim:

#1 Attention

Sometimes I find myself wanting love and attention, then reprimand myself because a person in my past told me it was wrong. But I have finally realized that human connection is a basic need in life for most people. I shouldn't feel guilty for getting sad when I don't have many opportunities for human connection.

I've gotten so used to either being completely reliant on one person or completely reliant on myself and forgot that there is a different way to live. I can have multiple people I get my connection from without still feeling isolated. I just needed to find the right people while in the right mental state.

monsterfuckers will see an unfuckable monster and dream of ways to fuck them