Aftercare Should Generally Involve The Opposite Of The Things A Scene Involved, It Should Balance The

Aftercare should generally involve the opposite of the things a scene involved, it should balance the "negative" physical and psychological impact of the scene.

This is a fairly neat summation and simplification of a very complex and nuanced topic. But it's a good place to start if you're new and don't quite understand the concept of aftercare or if you're experienced and trying a new type of play. It's a simple framework to build upon as you learn more about your individual needs and the needs of your play partner(s).

So what are the physical and psychological impacts of a scene. (Do note we're specifically talking about those impacts we don't want to last past the end of a scene, puppies don't want to be told they're not puppies as aftercare)

I'm not going to separate these because what effects you psychologically is also going to effect you physically and vice versa. These things are not separate.

A good example on the more psychological side might be degradation which damages a submissive's self worth, self image, ego, etc. To balance this aftercare should focus on affirmation and rebuilding /healing those things. Similarly fear play damages a submissive's sense of safety/ wellbeing, aftercare for which should involve being made to feel safe, comfortable with their dominant, and st ease.

Having said that, a good example of this balance on the more physical side is replacing lost energy. Basically no matter what type if play you're engaging in you will burn a lot of energy, so to balance that you should replace that energy. I write about this in much more detail HERE.

Getting a little more complicated; sub drop. Coming 'down' from a submissive headspace, especially one that includes pain play, can be very unpleasant. The neurotransmitters released during a scene fade away, this feels something like the crash after an adrenaline spike, and can leave a submissive feeling lethargic, empty, sad, etc. To balance this aftercare should involve things the submissive enjoys to bring those neurotransmitter levels back up a little and alleviate some of the withdrawal symptoms. This can include but shouldn't be limited to; cuddles, kisses, warm snugly things like blankets and stuffies, their favourite snacks, their favourite movie or TV show, etc

"Top drop" is less a neurological thing and more of a social thing. Although the top headspace also includes it's own share of neurotransmitters which also drop off it's almost always to a much lesser extent. The most common major effect of top drop is guilt; hurting someone you care about is something deeply ingrained as bad and even if they like it, even if they're begging for it, it can still effect you really deeply. Aftercare for this should involve affirmation that the bottom isn't hurt beyond what they want to be, that they still care about and trust their dom, etc.

This is an infinitely nuanced topic, I could write until the character limit and still not cover all the ways that aftercare could go. But I have to draw a line in the sand somewhere so let me make one final point. Don't worry too much about getting this perfectly right the first few times, you'll figure out what you need and what your play partner(s) need. The most important part is the "care" half of "aftercare" show them you're willing yo put in the effort to make sure they're OK and you can't go to wrong

More Posts from Junko-kat and Others

6 months ago

learned how to use blenders film making tools

1 year ago

corporate retreat 2/4

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"We're going to be performing your induction in one of the private rooms," Dr. Moon said. "Less distractions will help us gather better data. Besides, we had one free, and I always work better there."

"Sounds good," said Quinn, genuinely. If they had to undergo this procedure, they'd rather do it in a more private setting.

They were led into a small room that reminded Quinn of a particularly sinister dentist's office (which was saying something, considering Quinn thought all dentists were a bit sinister). The plush recliner was in the middle, surrounded by the usual array of screens and tools and drugs. A couple of department workers, lower ranked than Dr. Moon, were standing by. They both looked at Quinn expectantly, and they realized that they weren't really getting as much privacy as they had hoped.

"Have a seat, please, and we'll go over what your induction will be like," said Dr. Moon, gesturing to the chair.

Quinn only hesitated for a moment before sitting down in the imposing device. It was just as comfortable as they imagined it might be -- they'd never wanted to risk sitting in one just to see what it was like, lest it whir to life and trap them. They felt like they were sinking into the soft cushions, like it'd be hard to pull themselves out if they needed.

One of the assistants stuck a couple of electrodes on their forehead, which Quinn accepted without complaint. The other assistant picked up one of the restraining straps. "Is that necessary? I'm being compliant," said Quinn.

"You can be left unrestrained for now," said Dr. Moon. "But if you fight the procedure, we might need to strap you in for your own safety."

"Sure." They didn't have any real intention of fighting physically, at least.

"First, we're going to give you a few cognitive tests," Dr. Moon explained. "Then we'll begin administering a moderate sedative through this mask." She holds up a black rubber face mask. "This will make you feel very drowsy and soften your mind for the induction. We'll repeat the cognitive tests to see how you're responding. We'll be putting you in a state of twilight sleep where you'll be deeply sedated but still able to respond to stimuli. This gives us a chance to monitor your brainwaves and responses and tailor the procedure specifically to your brain."

"Okay," said Quinn, trying to push down their anxiety over being put helplessly to sleep.

"Once you're at the target level of sedation, we'll use an IV line to administer a mixture of sedation and our proprietary brainwashing formula. It's a very pleasant cocktail of medication, and very potent." 

"Lovely."

"Once the medication stabilizes, we'll wake you up enough to ease you into a deep hypnotic trance state. Then you'll be completely under our control, and you'll get to relax for a while in the chair watching a hypnotic program on the screen, one which you'll find intensely fascinating once we have you properly medicated. How does that sound?" 

"...Terrifying, mostly."

Dr. Moon laughed. "That's a common reaction, but believe me, you're going to be incredibly relaxed before long."

"Do you always tell your subjects what you're going to put them through?"

"Generally, yes. We find it increases the success rate of the procedure."

"That's fair enough, I guess."

"Oh, one more thing -- my assistant here is going to be taking audio notes on your condition as you progress through the stages. I hope you don't mind."

"Why would I mind someone commemorating this experience by recording down every embarrassing thing I do?"

"Great, I'm glad it's not a problem," said Dr. Moon, pointedly ignoring the sarcasm.

"Start record," says the assistant into a little silver gadget. "Begin initial induction of subject for brainwashing procedure H800. Administering cognitive tests."

"First, we need to check your initial responses. Watch the penlight with your eyes, please." She waved her penlight across Quinn's field of vision, up and down, side to side, in diagonals and circles. "Reaction time within normal parameters. Pupils slightly dilated. Subject displays signs of anxiety."

"I can't imagine why," Quinn commented.

Dr. Moon held up a large flash card with simple math problems on it. "Solve these problems, please."

"Three. Seventeen. Eight. Uh, negative four. Forty-one."

"Count backwards from one hundred by sevens, please."

"Ninety-three, eighty-six, seventy-nine, seventy-two..."

"Subject is fully awake and alert," said the assistant. "Subject shows little hesitation in providing the correct answer to cognitive tests."

"We can start sedation, now," said Dr. Moon to the other assistant. "Put them on 50% Lullaby to start."

"Lullaby?" asked Quinn.

"We have code names for our drug formulations, so we don't reveal too much information about our methods to our subjects," Dr. Moon said. "We call it Lullaby because it slowly sings you to sleep. The effect will be subtle at first, but we'll have you nicely sedated in no time."

"...Great." Quinn tried not to flinch away as the assistant sealed the black rubber mask around their mouth and nose, securing it behind their head with a strap. The other assistant reclined the seat slightly so that they were laying comfortably at an angle.

"Beginning sedation of subject with 50% Lullaby. Subject is compliant and breathing normally. Heart rate is somewhat elevated."

"We'll give you a bit of oxygen before starting the drug, so just relax and take deep, even breaths, okay? The entire process takes a bit of time to make sure the subject is completely under, but just be patient and you'll be absolved of the need to think before you know it."

Quinn wondered if that was supposed to be comforting. They took a breath, and could smell something sweet, floral, a little chemical. So it was happening -- from here on out they'd be drugged and hypnotized and more than likely be the Brainwashing Department's plaything for a month at minimum. With any luck, they wouldn't be able to remember most of it.

Well, no use worrying about it now. They lay in the chair, trying to stay calm, wondering when the drug would kick in and watching the various monitors that they supposed must represent their brainwaves. They were colorful and rhythmic, and they had no idea what it all meant, but Dr. Moon was certainly interested.

Maybe they could just... take a nap...

Quinn shook themself, realizing they had fallen into a bit of a daze. Was that the sleeping gas starting to take effect? It was hard to say because they were pretty much always exhausted, but the urge to suddenly take a nap was unusual. Perhaps it was just their imagination, but their eyes did feel unusually tired. Like they'd feel better closed. The lights in the room were bright, and shutting their eyes would feel nice.

They yawned involuntarily and jerked themselves awake. They'd started to drift without even realizing how drowsy they'd become. The effects of the gas had crept up on them and made them so sleepy, their eyelids thick and heavy, their thoughts slowing. Now that the sedative was definitely working on them, they couldn't help the urge to fight against it, to try to keep themselves awake.

"Subject displaying signs of relaxation and sedation," said the assistant, as if to confirm Quinn's thoughts. "Heart rate has slowed. Breathing deep and even. Eyes are unfocused and glassy. Eyelids drooping involuntarily."

Quinn tried to open their eyes wider, but found them shutting down all by themselves a moment later. The gas really was putting them to sleep now. All they could think about was how tired they were, how much they'd like to go to sleep, the threat of brainwashing becoming more distant and hazy as their eyes slowly closed and their mind began to doze off.

"Can you open your eyes for me, please?"

They dutifully opened their eyes at the sound of the doctor's voice, blinking away the heavy weight of sleep. 

"Subject has clear difficulty with opening their eyes. Alertness greatly reduced. Subject still able to respond to sounds."

"Follow the penlight with your eyes for me."

They tried. The penlight seemed to leave trails behind it, and it was hard to keep up with the quick movements. Their eyes really wanted to shut down again. They yawned in a vain attempt to try and become more awake.

"Solve these problems, please."

It was another flashcard of simple, grade school math problems, but this time the numbers seemed to swim and dance before Quinn's eyes. The problems should've been easy, they should've been able to answer them quickly and get back to sleep, but their brain was refusing to focus. Ten minus three. They knew this. Ten minus three... ten minus three...

"...Seven," they finally said. "And the next one is... four. And then..."

Two two-digit numbers. That was too many digits. Forty-six plus twenty-one. They knew this. They knew this! But the numbers just wouldn't stay in their drowsy head long enough to produce an answer. Sleep... they were so, so sleepy... their eyelids were drooping shut again without their consent.

"Quinn? Can you solve the problem?"

Quinn struggled to get their eyes back open. They had almost fallen completely asleep for a second. They stared at the treacherous numbers, trying in vain to make their tired brain function.

"Subject is slow to produce answers to basic math problems," said the assistant. "Subject shows clear signs of severe cognitive impairment while sedated. Subject is frustrated but compliant. Subject's eyes keep closing even when the subject has been instructed to focus."

"Too sleepy for math, huh?" said Dr. Moon in a mocking tone. "That's fine. You're progressing very nicely. We'll be able to start the next phase soon."

Cognitive impairment... too sleepy for math... Quinn burned with embarrassment. They didn't like this, being too sedated to answer the simplest questions while being observed and teased. They didn't like having to fight their leaden eyelids so hard just to keep from falling back asleep. They didn't like the feeling of being so heavily drugged and drowsy and out of it. Was this what it would be like for the next month?

In a half-asleep haze, Quinn tried to reach for the mask over their face, the one pumping the artificially sweet sleeping gas into their system. If they could just get some fresh air... But their arm felt as impossibly heavy as their eyelids, and they could barely manage to clumsily paw at the mask.

"No, no, no resisting," said Dr. Moon, easily grabbing their wrist and pinning their arm down to the armrest. "Let's give the subject 30% Somnolence with the Lullaby. Shift their brain fully out of gear."

"No," Quinn protested weakly. That was exactly what they didn't want, but they were too drowsy to put up any meaningful resistance. They could smell something like lavender, which they assumed was the new drug mixing in. There was a strange tingling right at the base of their skull, and a few seconds later, they couldn't think. If the other gas was a Lullaby, this was more like a hammer to the brain. Any fight was instantly drained from them as they sank back into the chair, letting their heavy eyes close down and slipping away into slumber.

They weren't sure how long they spent drifting in and out of consciousness. Dr. Moon was talking, they thought, but they sounded so muffled and far away that it might have been a dream. It felt like they might sleep like this forever.

The voice grew louder, more insistent, and Quinn tried to focus on it. "Quinn? Quinn, are you with us?"

"Mmm," they said.

"Can you squeeze my hand? I'm holding your left hand right now."

Quinn furrowed their brow. They seemed so disconnected from their body that the task seemed impossible, but they tried, and found that they actually could feel a hand holding theirs.

"Good. Do you know where you are?"

Where they were... They did know that, but the answer floated away from them when they tried to grasp it. "...sleeping...?"

"Yes, you're in a state of twilight sleep right now. Not that you can probably understand that. Do you know where you are?"

"Work...?"

"That's right. And what department...?"

"I work in IT," they mumbled.

"Close enough. We'd better reduce the gas a little bit. We may have overshot."

Quinn was just glad that the interrogation had stopped and they could go back to floating in a sleepy fog. 

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5 months ago

you need to pet a trans girl until she unmasks and stop pretending to be human

1 year ago
Drop Deeper And Deeper.....

Drop deeper and deeper.....

Drop deeper and deeper.....

Drop deeper and deeper.....

Drop deeper and deeper....

Reblog if you want to go deeper

5 months ago

cute idea: going on long walks together, holding hands! luckily it's cold out and we're wearing layers...so nobody can see the collar you have one isn't a regular one for people, it's for pets! i know because while we're "holding hands" i'm really holding the end of your leash~ we're so sneaky cuz we pulled the lead through your sweater sleeve. isn't that cute? nobody here but me knows what a dumb lil pet you are~ i'll keep your secret though, don't worry!

8 months ago

ATTENTION ALL LITTLES WHO WANT TO MAKE FRIENDS! 🎀🍼😋

reblog this post to find friends and help other littles find friends too! 

5 months ago

hypnotizing yourself really is the most adorable thing.

yes, stare into that pretty spiral and let your mind go blank... so open... sinking down, down, down into that familiar place where you're all warm and fuzzy and obedient. that's it... nice and pliable now, aren't you, cutie?

you don't need to be doing this. nobody ordered you to train your mind like this, conditioning yourself to obey every order given to you, without thinking, without needing to think...

you don't have to do it, but you want to, don't you? yes, you do, because you know it will only make you a better pet when you finally have an owner to serve. and that makes you such a good pet already. so eager to be trained, to submit, that you're happy to train yourself with all these audio files and pretty spirals, letting their suggestions take control of you.

it will be sooo easy, someday, for whoever you choose to serve, to wipe away your mind completely. all they'll have to do is say a few certain words, or snap their fingers, or hold a spiral in front of your eyes... and you'll drop so easily, won't you? you'll practically be putty in their hands. and it'll feel so incredibly nice to go down deep for someone other than yourself. all of your hard work, all your time spent training, will pay off, in the end.

so go on, keep watching those spirals (they're too pretty to stop), keep letting all those calm, soothing voices slip between the cracks in your mind and make you drop. let them tell you who you're meant to be, who you want to be. it will all pay off.

that's a good pet~

6 months ago

How to actually train a submissive, a how to guide

+Thoughts on the pervasive misinformation surrounding punishments and their usefulness.

Step 1. Make sure your submissive actually want to be trained. I'm into dom breaking, I'm into kidnapping, I'm into all types of situations where you forcibly change a person into the perfect submissive. But that's all fantasy, and they're fun fantasies to play out with willing participants. (Yeah i know this is pretty obvious stuff, everyone should know this already, but it is an important first step and it cant hurt to repeat)

Step 2. Pick a goal. The perfect example is getting them to take their pills at the same time each day. Its something they already want to do, its something that will benefit them greatly, its something that's very obviously pass/ fail, and its simple. Those are the criteria for a good behaviour to modify (with "want to do" flipped to "don't want to do" if its a behaviour you're trying to stop). The fewer of those things are true the more difficult its going to be to get the desired result, not impossible mind you but more difficult. As you and your submissive gain experience and become more comfortable with this process you can begin to modify more complex behaviours, but keep it simple to start.

Step 3. DO reward success, DO NOT punish failure. I'm gonna let myself rant about this at the end of this guide but for the moment just believe me when i say punishments are not a useful tool in training. So reward them every time the succeed. The best rewards are small things that stimulate the pleasure centre of their brain. Praise is a great place to start, stickers, snacks, tiny animal erasers, maybe shiny treasures if they have corvid like proclivities. Whatever it is make sure you give it to them personally, make sure you show you're genuinely happy with them, and make sure its something they cant get or aren't allowed to have otherwise. If the do fail (and they will sometimes) don't reward them, don't punish them, and don't let them punish themself. They want to be good for you, they will take failure hard. You need to make sure they know failure isn't a bad thing, everyone fails sometimes especially when starting to learn something. You need to reassure them that you're not angry or sad or upset and especially not disappointed.

Step 4. Be consistent. Reward them every time until they have a perfect record for a significant period of time. The specifics of this depend too much on the specifics of the behaviour and the reward so i wont try to give guidelines. Once they have that perfect track record start reducing the frequency of the rewards, stress to them that this isn't a punishment this is a really good thing. It means the training is working and they should be proud of themself and you are proud of them. Once you've weaned them off of the reward all together give them a big reward as a congratulations. And then sporadically reward them as a reminder that you're proud of them and to keep the habit strong. If the behaviour begins to drift you might need to go back and start rewarding them again, this shouldn't be seen as failure, its a normal part of training.

Step 5. Start again. Do they still want to be trained or are they happy with where they are? Is there another behaviour you want to modify? Is it time to try a more difficult modification? Do you need to switch up the reward to keep them motivated? Do you have the bandwidth to be consistent?

A note on brats. Specifically type 3 brats as described in THIS post. None of my advice changes. They still want to be good for you they just also want to play a fun game with you. Enjoy the fun game and train them to improve their lives. Just, don't try to train them out of being a brat, they're enjoying their game don't take away something that they enjoy, if you don't want a brat don't get with a brat.

Finally here is the as promised rant about punishment.

To the submissive reading this. You don't deserve to be punished, you never deserved to be punished. Even if you were a "problem" child you didn't deserve to be hurt for it. You still don't deserve to be hurt in ways you don't want to be. To the dominant reading this, yes you can rule through fear it is possible, but gods why?! If your ultimate goal isn't for your sub to be as happy and self fulfilled as possible, whatever that looks like for them, then what the fuck are you doing. And aside from that punishment isn't even an effective method of training. A dog kicked whenever it barks will learn to fear you and wont bark around you. A child spanked whenever you feel they've done something wrong will learn to resent you and will hide everything from you. An adult punished for stealing will learn to steal more effectively. Your submissive is no different from any of those examples. Kill the cop in your head, stop thinking of punishment as a legitimate means of control.

4 months ago
Weird Thing Happened To Me The Other Day

Weird thing happened to me the other day

4 months ago

Class-D

"Umm....?"

You stare at the affini sitting across from you, who is sipping casually from a large mug of tea.  She had grown close to you over the last year, but the last few weeks in particular had been...more?  She suddenly seemed intent on pushing you towards florethood, and more specifically towards one of the more...simple lifestyles.

'There are as many ways to be a floret as there are florets', as the saying goes.  You considered yourself an outgoing and independent type, one who had (with effort and support) gone far, despite any neurodivergencies that often ground progress to a slow crawl.  But the way Ea would look at you...the things she said...well, like what she JUST said, for example.

"I'm merely suggesting that you give it a try, dear.  No contracts, no implants...unless you want those.  I'm referring to something a bit simpler."

You frown, crossing your arms.  "And what exactly do you have in mind, Ea?"

A brilliantly red flower blossoms before your lips, the needles tip glistening green.  "I give you a Class-D, of course.  One that prevents those pesky inhibitions and falsehoods from getting in the way.  And then you and I can chat a little, and I may ask you to do a few things, to see if they make you feel good.  Is that really so dangerous, sweetie?"

"I..." Yes, of course it was...was what you wanted to say.  But if it really was just a Class-D, then it wouldnt change your mind.  They were there to reveal the truth, and the truth of the matter was that you were capable and competent, and it's about time she figured that out.  Sighing, you roll up your sleeve and extend your arm, wincing as the injection slips into your skin.  The verdant drug travels up your arm and to your brain, and an....interesting feeling seems to settle on you.  Not the fresh-out-of-a-dryer blanket of a Class-A, but a slightly warm sheet, perhaps.  You blink a few times, then look at Ea expectantly.

She gently snaps her fingers at you, then points at the floor next to her seat.  "No no, darling.  We aren't going to one-half ass it here.  I intend to show you what I mean, through actions as much as words."

You gawk at her, blushing furiously.  "But...but I don't want to do that!"

"Why?"

"It's embarrassing!"

Ea tilts her head, a coy look passing through violet eyes.  "The only one who thinks it is embarrassing is you, petal.  No one else in this case will care in the least, and you already know what I think you need." She smiles. "If it helps, just think of it as me...coercing you into it.  If anyone asks, you can explain that you didn't have a choice here."

You squint your eyes at her, but your gaze soon follows her arm down to her pointed finger.  Crumbs, she really was serious.  You look around the cafe again, noting how the others weren't even looking your way.

Blushing, you let yourself go limp, flowing off the lip of the seat and into a kneel as you shuffle towards her spot.  When you arrive, you keep your gaze firmly fixed to the left, your hands grasping themselves out of a need to hold onto something.

You wait for her to speak...but she stays silent.  She waits until you give in, until you sneak a glance at her, and only then does she cup your cheek in one large hand as she whispers, "Good Pet."

"I...y-you...it-" she slides her hand over your mouth, preventing the words from haphazardly tumbling out.

"Sweetheart, I said we would chat.  I never said you would get to use people words~"

The hand returns to your cheek, a thumb gently brushing across your lips as she smiles triumphantly.  "Now then, pet.  You are a wonderfully skilled sophont, make no mistake.  But a trained pet is still a pet, honey.  And not everything trained into you is Good."

You open your mouth to protest...only to let the words die in your throat at the warning in her eyes.  Instead, the softest little slip of a whimper manages to drip from your tongue.

Ea smiles wider, her other hand joining the first on your head as she begins to pet you, long firm pulls of her fingers through your hair.  "You know that you push yourself too hard, don't you?  That you keep moving, because the inertia is part of how you stay upright.  You need the constant motion, because you're worried that as soon as you slow down, you'll topple over and shatter."

You try to deny it.  You try to disprove it.  But in the end, you are forced to admit it to yourself:

She's right.

She gently brushed a tear from the corner of your eye, softer than the petals of her flowers.  "But that needn't happen, honey.  Not if you have an Owner to care for you, and hold you close, and keep you safe.  You know this too, don't you?"

You did.  You do.  And it hurts.  And it heals.

Your eyes make a desperate plea towards her, though for what, you aren't sure.  She seemed to be waiting for it, though, because her eyes glow golden ichor.  "And so, since you are being honest with me, I shall be in turn with you.  I will not wait a single second longer to give you what you want, need, crave.  You are my pet, honey.  I will Own you, I will train you, I will condition away any independence and wrestle your thoughts into simple submission.  And, in the end, you will thank me for it."

Her hand brushes one last time over your head as it makes its way to the back of your neck, tracing a line where you know the implant will soon reside.  You shudder as she presses down, down, Down, pushing your face into her vines as you finally are honest with yourself and admit what you realize you always wanted, always needed.

You surrender.

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