He Lowkey Becoming Relatable

alfred f jones would absolutely kill riding a mechanical bull i said what needed to be said

Every time someone likes my post it feels like I am simple humble mortal who placed an apple on a shrine only for a god to suddenly come down personally eat my apple and go “very delicious 10/10” if they reblogged it then it’s still the same just they also slapped on a sticky note

Countries and Connections

This is a post that is just going to explore the many ways by which countryhumans are connected to their colonies through a bond that they share.

It's a bit long, so the headcanon is under the cut. I have also added this to my website.

The critical thing to remember is the bonds shared between countryhumans and their subdivisions is that the way they feel the bond is entirely dependent on the personality of the countryhumans whose land they are a part of, so I have a few examples I’m going to explain just to set out the general idea. If there are any not on this list you would like to see, shoot me and ask, and I will explain it.

AMERICA AND HIS STATES

As bonds are determined by the country’s personality, America’s adoration of his children has made their bond feel like a blanket wrapped around them. To many states, this bond feels warm and safe, and many of them often lean into it for comfort. It’s like when it’s a cold day outside, and you wrap yourself up in a blanket and lie down in your bed, warm and comfortable. 

However, while the bond they share is primarily positive, like all bonds between country and subdivision, it can turn harsh and oppressive. While blankets can be a source of comfort and warmth, they can also become hot and suffocating, which is how that bond can turn. Most of the time, this comes about when America is mad at a state, and they can feel the comfortable warmth of the blanket getting hotter and hotter and suffocating. In a way, it is a survival instinct, telling them when to turn back and stop doing whatever it is that they are doing that is causing their country so much anger. This is also completely unintentional on America’s part, as he does not control this bond, and instead, it just reacts to him.

Although all his subdivisions, states and territories, feel this bond, most are unaware of the strength of it, as they have lived their entire life with it. They subconsciously tune out a lot of the bond; to them, it is just a fact of their lives. However, some states and territories are more aware of it than others. 

USVI, Puerto Rico, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, Connecticut, Delaware, New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Maryland, Virginia, and North Carolina were all colonies of other empires before joining the USA, so bonds have been a natural part of their lives. However, America is very different than the bonds of their original nations, so they are aware of it more due to this difference. The kind of bond changed, and ergo they are more aware of it. The former Confederate states are also more aware of it due to their brief life as a part of the CSA.

To continue this talk of Confederate States, South Carolina, Mississippi, Florida, Alabama, Georgia, Louisiana, and Texas were all briefly independent before forming the CSA, meaning all of them know what it is like to not have the bonds of a nation on them. Texas especially, as he was an independent country before even being an American. The same goes for the states of California, Vermont, and Hawaiʻi, each with their histories of being independent countries. 

It is a bond that is very diverse and fluctuating but one that is relatively positive in comparison to other bonds.

BRITAIN AND HIS COLONIES

Britain is controlling. That comes to no one’s surprise. And, like how America’s adoration of his kids affected his bond, Britain’s controlling nature affects how his bond feels.

His colonies will argue a lot about how it feels. Some feel that it is chains on their soul, their arms, and legs, keeping them chained to his side and his empire. Some feel more like it is just ropes that tie them to Britain, but never ones that tie around specific body parts of anything. How they interpret it depends on whether they were an independent nation before their colonization and how strongly Britain tries to control them. The more he tries to pull them closer, the more that rope-like bond turns into chains. 

It was not always something that felt negative for the colonies, as most did not know life without it and thought that it was natural. However, the bond would often feel choking and oppressive, even as they argued that it was good.

When Britain got mad, that was when the bond really became noticeable. Chains became spiked, ropes tightened until they burned, and the colony was left with an oppressive wave of fear that choked them into silence like a noose tightening around their neck. Britain knew this and abused the bond to keep them quiet and docile.

For countries that came under Britain’s control, they were constantly aware of the bond, especially the more they were mistreated and/or hated it. Ireland always felt like chains were on his wrists (once Britain took power, that is, England’s original bond with Ireland felt different), even when nothing was there. He would feel that feeling almost every day up until his independence. It is very dependent on how willingly they joined him, however, and how their personal relationship was defined. 

The bond was definitely marked more by personal emotions than political ones, and it always varied in terms of chains vs. rope on how much Britain believed they needed to be controlled.

FRANCE AND HER COLONIES

France’s bond with her colones is like a storm, a force of nature that rages between them. Bonds are not physical things and, therefore, do not need to be connected by a physical feeling. France, a force of nature in her own right, would not manifest a bond in any other way. To her colonies, they often feel the bond as a gentle rainfall, leading to them being able to define France’s moods based on the weather.

She is not happy; she’s a rainstorm. She’s not angry; she’s a thunderstorm, and so on and so forth (I might put together a list of weather events and how they correlate to her emotions.)

It can be a bit hard to describe this bond when compared to the very psychical and controlling aspect of Britain’s bond, but that is indeed the point. Britain seeks control of his colonies, America seeks to care for them, and France is a force of nature her colonies must contest with. That is not to say she doesn’t care for them; she does, but she is just so bold, brash, and argumentative in her personality that she is far from the stereotypical depiction of a caring mother.

When she is angry, the bond turns into a storm that can decimate land and buildings, a storm that is directed at the colony of her ire and meant to bring them to her knees. France does not expect total control as Britain does, but she still expects those under her to be on their knees and swear loyalty. When she is happy with them, it is like a gentle rainfall after a long drought, the kind of feeling meant to bring about gratitude and thankfulness.

SPANISH EMPIRE AND HIS COLONIES

Spanish Empire’s bond with his colonies is like a cord connecting him to his colonies. Not a rope, not a chain, just a cord tying them together. Since Spanish Empire was not the most involved with his colonies, the cord was not often affected by his emotions, just sitting there and reminding everyone of their connection. Because of this, most colonies did not feel the bond until they started declaring independence.

There was the exception of New Spain, who adored Spanish Empire and borderline worshipped him, so he was always aware of the bond as he tried to wrap it tighter and tighter around himself, but he was the exception.

When Spanish Empire became upset with its colonies, the cord would tighten, but never to a degree that felt painful to them. Spanish Empire cared deeply about its family and never wanted to hurt them. So, his bond reflected that idea and remained just a reminder that they were his colonies, but never as a form of punishment like some countries used their bond.

RUSSIAN EMPIRE AND HIS COLONIES

Russian Empire’s bond with his colonies is like a warm fire in the cold, a light, and heat that those near to it will cling to as a source of heat and strength. Russian Empire was not a very loving or affectionate man, and he saw his colonies more as something to use than their own individual people, which made this bond unique. As Russian Empire had no strong feelings to contribute to the bond, the bond’s feelings were, in fact, made up of how his colonies felt about him. 

To his colonies, he was a good man who looked after them, and since they were both places up north, they viewed that through the lens of something that helps in the cold, a fire, and that was what the bond manifested as. A nice fire that got warmer the closer they were to Russian Empire, as well as when he was happy with them.

When he is angry, the fire goes out. No warmth. No light. No heat. Just a bitter wind and biting cold that freezes you in place under his icy gaze as the cold penetrates your very being. Bitterly cold, his anger is. Even if they were surrounded by real fire or in the hottest place on earth, his colonies would still feel frigid to their very core. It doesn’t affect their body's health, but to them, they are in danger of freezing.

His colonies will do a lot to preserve that warm feeling. It is very reflective of the situation many of his colonies were in, where they loved Russian Empire, but he did not care if he needed to leave them to die.

Love imagining nations at their meetings. Like oh look at their little assigned seats with their little cup of water and their little name plate with their little flag pin!

Aww they're showing off their little slideshows at their little podium! Oh no! England and France are having a little fight! Oh and America has a little plan to save the planet! And he broke the little podium with his fist!

Oh, and Germany has a little migraine! He's going to count to ten in his head because of what his little anger management coach taught him!

Oh and now they're on their little lunch break! They packed their little national dishes for lunch!

And the cycle repeats.

america goes to therapy.

What it's like being roommates with Jeff, Ben, and Toby in a dingy apartment headcanons (platonic)

• Ben would nag you to play video games with him but if he lost he'll get pissed and go in the game and hack it

• Eye drops all over the apartment since Jeff leaves them everywhere and keeps losing it

• Toby and Jeff would try and attempt to cook something. You have to supervise them while they are testing out this waffle maker

• They stuffed it with hot dogs and eggs it wasn't half bad solid meal

----

• You brought your date around the house, beforehand you had to force them to clean the whole place

• Ben shoved all his crap in cabinets and drawers

• Jeff didn't do shit and made more mess

• Toby is the only one who helped but not without complaining the whole time

• Once you and your date came over it was dead silent, no one in sight. You guys were sitting in the living room chatting when the tv turned on by itself

• Oh you knew what was coming suddenly Ben pops out of the tv and crawls out of it. Your date never went there again

• Every time you bring your date over they take turns scaring the shit out of them and track it down on the scoreboard score. Whoever has more scares wins

----

• When you came home upset from whatever happened they tried comforting you.

• They ended up stealing money from a store and y'all spent it all shopping

• Everyone has mood swings so you'll hear shouting here and there

• Music blasting at 3 am from jeff's room

• Bribe eachother with chores or blackmail

• Be careful where you step there might be sharp objects and shit on the ground

• Takes each others clothes after laundry day They accidentally gave each others clothes don't know which is whos

-----

• One of them has a shrine of slashers they really look up to. Ben likes Patrick Bateman, Jeff likes Billy Lenz, and Toby likes Norman Bates

• Need to replace the xbox controllers a lot cause Ben always throws it

• Jeff punches things to take his frustration out so there are a few holes on the walls

• Toby asks you to punch his stomach while doing pull ups cause he thinks it'll make him stronger it really doesn't do anything since he can't feel pain

• Jeff and Toby sometimes bans Ben from video games cause he usually cheats

• Ben and Jeff were play fighting. Jeff got too carried away and accidentally stabbed Ben. Toby called you to go home and deal with them

• Go yell at Ben to take a shower

• If you're going through something and too tired to do chores they'll do it instead

• You all got pet fish but it died a week later. Ben tried giving them Monster

• You once bought one of those cold cases murder mystery to play it with them not even 15 mins in and they got it right. They bet whoever solves it first doesn't have to do any chores and sore losers has to pay for food and do everything in the apartment

• Whenever you play jazz they pretend to be in a horror movie to freak you out

• When you all watch a horror movie they'll be very sarcastic and exaggerate their reactions

• You blackmailed all of them to dress like the heathers and they blackmail you to be their Veronica

• Whenever you would play video games Ben would randomly pop up in there and give you a jump scare

• You joked to them about them being your guard dogs so when you went out they started barking at everything you never made that joke again

• They purposely piss you off by taking your words literally "What? you told me to piss off"

---

• Whenever you start having crush they make a plan on how to get rid/test this new person

• Your date just sees three scary looking men behind you without you knowing

• Ben and you have moments where you laugh at nothing

• Noise complaints all the time you guys almost got kicked out. Don't worry they took care if it meaning sending a warm message to your neighbors

• When you asked what happened to the neighbor they'll just say "they probably moved" and leave before you could ask anymore questions

___

ill give you a smooch if u reblog

this is them playing as the heathers💀

Dare I say America core

Atomic Heart - Communism vs Capitalism

(animated sketches 1954)