When You Start S/H At A Young Age And So Now You Have A Habit Of Looking At People's Arms, Legs, Or Thighs

¿Me quieres qué?

FUUUUCK....... i sure could go for a Nice, Cold, and Refreshing glass of

Ice Water

right about now.......

Losing my M I N D

Hey, I hope y'all been doing okay.

It's been a while since I wrote something, like¿¿ 1-2 months¿¿ I don't know, but the last time I wrote was the day ¿43? Of quarantine, and now is day 91.

I'm going to start writing because i'm sleepy and I have class today.

School

Pls end my suffering.

I don't fucking know ANYTHING about my grades, I could have failed everything without knowing.

Some teachers are asking for exercises I couldn't send, but they don't say WHAT sPECIFIC EXERCISEEEEEE. THEY JUST NEED TO SAY THE NAME OF THE EXERCISE, HOW DIFFICULT IS THAT?

Science is the worst, the teacher just can't realize that we have another 6 classes, not just science?????

I had a breakdown on monday, because one of my answers in spanish was wrong, and later the science teacher said my work was incomplete because I didn't add A FUCKING PERSONAL COMMENT I DIDN'T REMEMBER, FUCK.

Like, when I say it, it doesn't sounds so bad when I say it, but look, I spent my whole day doing my homeworks, I can't take a "it's not good enough" as something because i'll start crying.

I can't feel enough.

Now that we're talking about school, do you remember the last time I said I wanted to change school and that I was anxious about it??

My mum got me an opportunity in a girl's school, and I was so happy about it. Until I had to tell my dad.

He said no.

Because it doesn't have sense to change school if at the end of the year i'm gonna get expelled as always. I got expelled in 5th grade, in 6th grade I had to repeat, and leave. I was so sad to focus on my studies, I lost on purpouse and when I tried to win it wasn't enough. And it looks like he's the only one who can't just forget about it.

He said that I was doing okay in this school, and that shows how an uninterested parent he is. 'Cause in the last months I had 8384648373 breakdowns, my grades went down and I got that fucking insufficient in attitudes, please get me out of here.

The Guinea pig situation.

The last month I got O B S S E S E D with the hamsters, and I wanted one, but the only option I had was to get a guinea pig, so I started to investigate about them. I'm in love with the Guinea pigs. My mum was okay with getting me some, I just had to take care of them.

And here is when my dad enters to do NOTHING 'CAUSE HE SAID NO😎👌

He said no because "Guinea pigs make holes"?????? And because "they have a lot of babies" I even explained to him that they were gonna be inside my bedroom, and that I was gonna get two girls.

But he said "my word is the one that matters and is NO".

So I don't have a Guinea pig.

I told my girlfriend and she said "it's okay, calm down, it doesn't matter, is something that you want, not something you need".

I felt so bad, if they knew how much time I spent investigating just because I wanted them.

I want something to take care of, I want to feel needed, I want to feel useful, and I thought maybe an animal can fill that, it sounds selfish, but I feel so bad, I really wanted them. but nobody cares, as always.

Well, that's all i have to say now, have a good night/day/afternoon.

Day 91: june 12

ur desperate for my attention, but can't even come up with an original insult without dragging food into it

Baby you're the one that has been sending me anons nonstop, if you want attention so badly, why don't you just get help and get better? Or your life's so sad you have to drag strangers with you to your own hell? Cause it seems like it. Ill tell you what, you're just a sad little girl that thinks everyone has to be as miserable as her to feel good.

But guess what nena, i'm good. As i say, this is a vent blog, i come and go everytime. But i'm good, recovery has been the best thing that happened to me, and i also learned that NOBODY treats me worse than i do, you can't hurt me. But you can keep hurting yourself and your sad little life every time you send me something. Besos en la cola !!

I want blood running thru my arms

«Lo mejor nunca se sube»

And it's a picture of me at the hospital eating, while i had a psychotic episode

My mind is going SHUSH SHUSH SHUSH out of happiness idk it's so nice WUUUUUUUUU

I'm gonna take my eyeballs out and step on them

Me at the dinner of my first day of my vacations realizing that I can't fast because my parents and brothers are in vacations too:

/ / / / / / / / español/ / / / / / / /

Yo en la cena de mi primer día de vacaciones dandome cuenta de que no puedo hacer fast porque mis padres y hermanos también están de vacaciones: