What's The Tea, Sis

Girl ... You think I didn't try? I've read way worse things than your childish insults. Graduate school and lmk when you get better material.

I wonder how much more I have to stay alive until I'm finally free

Whatever, i'm gonna eat Pollo en crema someone tell me when the world explodes as I said

I actually feel numb.

I don't know what else to do now, im scared. My girlfriend told me to do everything calmly, that at the end of the day even the most intelligent people repeat courses. But no, they don't. They get to go ahead to practice, while those who couldn't reach the minimum stay behind. And well, I'm staying behind.

I know I've been thru a lot this year. I've had multiple mental breakdowns, i even got admitted because of a psychotic episode. But i'm so low on respecting myself that to me it just looks like excuses to not work. I know i can do it, that if i wanted to, i could reach the stars. But it feels that even if i try and put my best efforts, it's not enough. I'm still behind.

I just wanted to be a doctor, for gods sake. But i should've just shoot lower and become a teacher or linguist. Forget about that dream of becoming a doctor. I don't have the potential, im not as useful as im supposed to be. People don't trust my habilitet, because i haven't shown any to anybody. I'm not a doctor, I'm just some girl who thought she could become one and was wrong. I'm just some girl who spend most of her adolescence studying to get an scholarship but now can't even stay on the same rythm than anybody else. My dreams never became true.

I miss my dad (my grandpa) the man who calls himself my dad will never take his place

I feel numb, i can only feel the way my rib cage moves when i breath. I don't know, i dont feel like doing anything at all

Me: omG I LOST 3 POUNDS ;_;

My brain: great, next, die

My ed: hOLD A FUCKING SECOND, WHEN, WERE, HOW, WHO, WHAT¿ but you still fat gurl.

Me: -counting how much calories I ate last week and trying to anilize how I lost 3 pounds in a week after bingin' 2 times-

Worst part of trauma after abusive relationships is that you never see relationships the same way again. Never. Ever. Again.

The way i communicate with somebody i love or i like is different. It is never direct on what i'm supposed to ask for. And always scared of a bad reaction. I'm terrified of people i love. People who haven't done anything but treat me right.

well, at least i got one exam right !!!

Now it's showtime