Jaybirdbluebottle - JayBird

Your next favourite might involve some foul play.

Start your 7 day free trial of Poob today, and watch cult classic Mališa: A Bird's Eye View of The Assassination That Triggered The Great War

Sure why not

yo mr white can you sign my permission slip so i can go to the aquarium bitch

Goths aren't "true to seed" in the sense that the biological offspring of two goths do not necessarily grow up to be goth, though inheriting the inclination for it from both parents increases the odds significantly. That is not how goths naturally reproduce.

The process is actually quite sophisticated, and requires the presence of a full-grown goth to trigger it. A pupal-stage proto-goth, at this point completely indistinguishable from any other small human child, only needs to encounter a mature specimen once - and while the initial imprinting that ensues will only take seconds, the incubation period often takes more than a decade, even several.

The first visible step of the transformation is triggered when the dormant goth suddenly gains awareness that they have free will and can do whatever they want with their appearance. While the progress may be gradual, or seem like the transformation happened all at once overnight, the initial seed was planted years ago. And now, in full bloom, a fully-fledged mature adult goth may finally be happy.

And that's why it's important to sometimes look goth as fuck in the grocery store. You might be seen by small child who had previously hoped to die before adulthood because everything they've heard about becoming a grownup is just pure misery, who will then consequently think to themselves "actually nevermind, that's what I want to be when I grow up."

reasons to brush your teeth

delicious minty treat just for you

feels weird and fun

yum yummy mint flavor

brains when they see a routine 🧠🎉

powerful mouth

Kind of a part two to this. Will Momo ever know peace?

presented without comment

not to brag but im wanted by some very important organizations

vegans annoy the shit out of me because i like tofu but it is impossible to find recipes for tofu that aren't all "ooh its vegan tofu you wont believe it's not real meat!" like i dont want tofu to pretend to be meat. i just like tofu.

nothing funnier to me than when AI does math wrong. like I get why it happens, it's a language model that's treating the numbers you feed it as words rather than integers and then giving you an answer based on how those words typically appear in a block of text instead of actually performing a calculation. but the one thing computers are genuinely incredible at. you fucked up a perfectly good calculator is what you did, look at it it's got hallucinations