Itlookslikeafreakinllama - Gallavich Owns My Soul

Delayed rage/rant

Grey’s just completely gutted all of the Japril fans. The direction they chose to take their storyline in and they way they did it is so heartbreaking and disrespectful to the fans and all the love and emotional investment and attachment we have built for their relationship. It’s disrespectful to their journey, to the albeit bumpy but uniquely beautiful story they shared. This is disrespectful to all the amazing things about Japril: their friendship, their chemistry, their deep love for one another. Also, this is a slap in the face to what Jesse and Sarah have created, their commitment and dedication to the characters and the fans, and their own long term investment in building this relationship. Even introducing the idea of this storyline, it feels like they've ruined, or at least tainted, the beauty of Japril.

Opinions wanted Hi everyone, I know it’s late to be discussing this but I’d really like some opinions. I was having a “disagreement” with another Grey’s fan about what Jackson’s silence meant during Japril The Movie, when they were signing the divorce papers, after April asked him whether he really wanted it. From my perspective, he didn’t answer because he couldn’t. There was no right or simple and truthful answer for him. I feel like the truth is that he was torn between WANTING to say he didn’t want the divorce because he still really loved her. While on the other hand NEEDING to say yes and proceed with it because he couldn’t accept and let go of her abandonment of him when he needed her most. He’s said in the past (to Lexie, I know, but it still applies as his lean towards self preservation at the cost of a relationship) that he had to walk away from her for him. When he spoke about the divorce to April, he said that he knew what he had to do, no matter how hard, that it was “best for him” moving forward and that his mind was made up. And at the same time acknowledging that when he just stopped thinking and let himself be with her, he wanted her. Those are obvious indications that he had strong conflicting feelings between his head and his heart… what was rational/“necessary” and what was emotional/desired. I can see sensing some spite or defiance in his facial expression but I think that’s only because he was still so hurt by the situation. Some people believe that his silence meant that he was sure he wanted a divorce and that his facial expression was saying “really?!?? Of course I want this” But that doesn’t make sense to me after all of his previous actions that he would be 100% certain that he wanted this. It was also suggested that he didn’t say anything because he was prideful and didn’t want to say anything in front of the lawyers. This idea is not in line with his character. It’s true that he has a hard time communicating his feelings but when pushed, he does it. He stood up at April’s wedding in front of all their coworkers and friends, risked his pride and dignity to express his love for her. This is not a man who would go through with a divorce simply out of fear of speaking up. Sorry for the long rant and overanalyzing. I feel very strongly that his silence and facial reaction were complex and profound. It was the climax of all of the intense and painful things they went through and that can’t be dumbed down and simply explained. Am I alone in seeing his reaction in this way? What do you guys think his silence meant?

the cats are coming for rhett

In honor of April, eating these tonight for the season finale. Here's hoping the fandom is "fortunate" enough to get some Japril scenes!

sunday rhett appreciation

JACKSON AND APRIL’S LOVE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER THAN THIS.

Thanks for everything, Kepner

You didn’t have it all together when you first came on the scene. You weren’t really sure what your exact purpose was, but you knew you had one. It was so easy to see you had a heart of gold and while you were a bit idealistic for my usual tastes - you were genuine. I liked that. 

I watched you struggle, make mistakes, and fail. I saw you get knocked down more times than I can count, but I also saw how many times you got back up. People didn’t make it easy for you. It was a little too easy to pick on you and pick on you they did. You were the butt of many jokes, but you took it right in stride and kept your eye on what you wanted. You knew who April Kepner was and that is all that mattered. 

I watched you fall in love with your best friend. I watched you change a young man who could have taken a very different path without your influence. It was so frustrating that you couldn’t see yourself the way he saw you. It was even more frustrating to see you make the wrong choice when the right one was in front of you. You were finally coming into your own professionally and I wanted to scream that you couldn’t seem to get it together personally. 

I watched someone who had always been so calculated and cautious throw it all to the wind and take a risk. I watched her finally follow her heart. You married your best friend and were the happiest you’d ever been. The kind of happiness that is palpable. Yeah, it was crazy but that’s what made it all the more wonderful. 

I watched you struggle through the early days of marriage. Learning to live together, learning to share finances, learning to navigate the differences in beliefs, and the Mother-in-law. Oh, the Mother-in-law. I sat in my living room with my jaw on the floor the night you very abruptly announced you were pregnant. I was so happy watching you prepare for the addition to your family. This person who had struggled so much in the beginning had finally come into her own. Trauma surgeon, wife, and very soon….Mom. 

I cried as you were given the worst news possible. I sat there shocked as you made the hardest, most selfless decision a person could possibly make. I sobbed as you struggled with the decision and gave birth to your baby boy. My heart was broken as you let him go. 

I watched you struggle in the aftermath of losing him. I watched you push everyone and everything away. For someone who had been knocked down time after time and gotten back up - this was bigger than all of that. You couldn’t find solid ground and you did what you had to do to survive.

I watched as you discovered that sometimes the hurt is simply too great, but that second chances were possible. I was equal parts horrified and elated to watch your baby girl come into the world. I was so certain she would be the road back. Things didn’t go quite as I’d hoped or even liked, but you made it. At the end of this wild ride, you made it. From the highest of highs to the lowest of lows, you made it. 

In a world full of Merediths, I thank you for teaching us it was ok to be an April. It was ok to march to the beat of our own drum. It was ok to fall down sometimes just as long as we got back up. It was ok to make mistakes. It was ok for life to be a mess. It was ok to stand for what we believe in even if it’s not the popular thing. It was ok to not be ok. It was ok to be ourselves.

So, at the end of her 9 year journey, I simply want to say thanks for everything. I laughed, I cried, I grieved, and I celebrated while watching the crazy, wonderful, messy, beautiful life that was April Kepner. 

I love Link and his close ups were gorgeous but let's not forget about this beauty! I mean, look at him!

If We Were Vampires

Japril will be forever endgame.

Japril will forever be endgame for these reasons:

1.They just are.

2.That they are meant to be. Both Sarah & Jesse think so.

3.Jesse wants off & out of that show so bad that nothing else could ever be.

4.Because the show ended 13x16. Just like Sarah & Jesse have said/implied.

“Japril will last forever for a reason.”- JW

I’m having a bit of a sad japril moment. So I need to remind myself of these points to make myself feel better.