Inkdipped-feathers - A Formerly Divine Kinblog

I am going to write about something weird that unsettles me deeply. 👍

So, say I were to take all my experiences literally, and say all my current theories are true. Say for a moment that I were to genuinely, deeply believe I am in fact the spirit-beast I perceive myself as.

I am not an entity that has a natural, built-in mind. I was conscious from my inception, sure, but a mind? No. I was an empty existence. I had no capacity for thought or feeling. I was static, silent - sleeping, in a way.

I learned how to think and feel from the biological life on this planet. As life became more complex, so did I; but always limited to the bounds of the experience of animals, plants and others, from whom I could learn how to experience the world rather than just existing as a self and nothing more.

So I was never what you could call "sapient". I had the knowledge of billions of years of memory, but intelligence is more than just knowledge - intelligence is reason, deduction, imagination. And in the realms of intelligence, I was animal. I had never had anything to teach me anything besides that.

And for all the hundreds of thousands of years humans have walked this Earth, and their disappeared relatives, I never once learned from them. I... think they scared me. I watched from a distance, but I never walked among them.

And now... here I am. I... didn't want this to happen, I think.

I'm... scared.

See, I as a spirit am functionally immortal - both in the sense of not aging, and in the sense that I cannot be killed or destroyed, as far as I'm aware. And I also, as a spirit, have a flawless memory; that's my entire purpose. That's what I do.

Naturally, when this body fades, I will remember the life I had here. I will remember what I learned... how to think in abstract, how to imagine something entirely unreal, how to wrangle hypotheticals and make complex goals and plans. I will remember having a concept of morality. I will remember feeling angry at a world I can understand so deeply yet cannot change.

So... well... I have been changed, by being here, you see? And I don't know what that means.

A billion years from now, when humans are long gone and no trace of them remains, will I - immortal and timeless - still be thinking in English? Will I find myself playing an old song in my head that hasn't been heard aloud in an unfathomable eternity? Will I catch myself daydreaming of playing minecraft?

Will I feel lonely, like I often do now?

And what does it mean for my nature, for my mind to so radically change? What impact will that have on the role I assume, the actions I take? A scary thought in itself, honestly. I wouldn't trust a god with the mind of a human. Humans care and feel far too deeply for that kind of position.

This is one of the things that makes me most fearful that any of these experiences might be true. I... hope they're not. Or at least that my view of things is such a warped interpretation that none of these fears I have actually apply.

Cause if not, then... I am scared.

Though... maybe I should learn some more languages just in case. I'd hate for the only human language to be preserved in immortal memory for all time to be fucking English.

An image of my wings

Fern Gully. 🌿🌲

Found a picrew that I could make a more accurate imitation of my visage than most, though it does paint me a bit too feminine. All things considered, I'm glad that's the only thing that feels too inaccurate.

On the left is a fairly accurate portrayal of how I looked without my veil. Usually my veil covered my eyes, so all that was visible were my nose and mouth. My kind all had long, straight hair, and our skin was extremely pale and fragile. I believe the headpiece was a sort of formal attire used when going to speak to our Creator, and other important scenarios. I'm not sure if I ever had jewlery, but I feel that necklace is what it'd look like if I did.

On the right is, again, a fairly accurate portrayal of how I looked without my veil. I didn't wear it always, but I had a black veil covering my nose and mouth. I believe I wore it when meeting new/important beings. I remember having dark/soft robes that I wore -perhaps a cloak- that had an opening for my wings. I always wore white face paint, especially the dots under my eyes. On occasion I'd change the markings on my forehead.

A small tut on how i made my ear wings

List of things you’ll need:

Foam sheet/cardboard -> for the base

feathers (i used these :

Scissors

Glue (i used hot glue)

A headband

STEP 1:

Cut out the base (i recommend using a real wing as a reference. The height of the base of the wing should be a bit bigger than the height of your ear.

i labelled them left and right, but it’s pretty useless to do that.

STEP 2:

I painted the base white because the feathers aren’t opaque, and we could see the purple of the base.

STEP 3:

It’s time to glue the long feathers on! Make sure to position them before gluing, to make sure they look ok. Make sure to to follow those handy guide!

STEP 4:

Position the second (round) layer of feathers! I fold over any feather that went over the base on the top, to keep it looking clean.

STEP 5:

Now is the time to add the fluffy feathers if you want to!

STEP 6:

Time for the back! You can either leave it white or put feathers on the back too.

STEP 7:

Almost done! It’s time to attach them to the headband. If the one you have is made of plastic and is smooth, you should wrap some thread around it and glue it to the headband before the wings, so that the wings won’t detach

This is the pink thread i used, it’s embroidery thread. I used about the length of my arm for each side, and i then lathered it in hot glue. Not super clean, but it works.

MAKE SURE YOU VERIFY THE PLACEMENT OF THE WINGS BEFORE GLUING THEM SO THEY’RE NOT WONKY!!!!

Next, the actual attaching. You can glue the ears directly onto the headband.

STEP 8:

Wow! Your wings are done! Good job :3

Feel free to message me if tou have questions! I’m not the best at explaining stuff ;-;

Also, if you made these, could you reblog with your finished product :3 i’m curious to see how it turned out!

@ixekopernik , @shadowfoxink , ty for asking for this!

I don't know if my Pantheon is actually the one I work with in this life, or perhaps it's just this life's equivalent. But my connection feels the same way it did back then, in whatever time/universe it had occurred in. The same thing goes for my original God and It's regime.

Everything had to be oh so painfully perfect- everything was created with a Purpose and an Appearance and one Did Not Stray from that. Even if you were different upon creation, and had not the intelligence nor intention to be as such, it was You who had Strayed from your purpose. And so it would be You who would be at fault.

I don't know how nor why I was different. I don't know why having golden eyes was so abhorrent that I had to wear a viel at all times- everyone (including myself) forbidden from gazing upon them. I was handicapped for Its mistake. For having something It couldn't control. I was alienated and shunned and had no true purpose to fulfill, which meant I was left to rot away while my peers and my Creator ignored my very existence.

And then I met someone. I cannot remember their face, nor their name, but I remember their hands- the strange feeling of their callouses, which none of my peers had. I don't remember what it sounded like, specifically, but I remember their voice- their tone belonging to one who'd not seen someone like me so close to their home. Not angry, not scared.. Kind. And... I'd say possibly curious/amused.

I remember falling in love with the forest- with the dirt and the plants and moss under my feet. With food, and beds, and fire. Oh, the fire... How perfectly imperfect it was- something that could burn and turn to ash, but also keep you warm and cook your meat. I'd never seen fire before- not in this way. Everything had its role to play, but it was messy and imperfect and happened in ways that could be harnessed- but never controlled. I fell in love with this world we were forbidden from exploring- in this world we knew nothing about.

I remember the veil barely let me see anything. In my mind, I could see my 'home' and my peers and my Creator- it was inherent knowledge etched into deep my being. So deep, if all of my senses had failed, I wouldn't notice. But only in that place.

I remember, after many visits, finally letting them lift it from my face. I didn't let them take it off- I couldn't bear the thought at the time- but I let them lift it. I remember seeing everything, seeing Them. They were so perfect. So different from my peers and unlike anything I had ever known, it was overwhelming. That moment was The Moment, I believe. The moment I was destined to leave my arrogant God, and join the Pantheon that felt like home.

I wonder who they were, the one who gave me my sight... I wonder if they've died and reborn just as I have- reforming and living under new names across time and space. I wonder if they're here now, a human like I am. I wonder if they remember the angel hiding golden eyes, who became the hearth tender of their Pantheon.

#🐦‍⬛🖤

🌌

hi all! i made my own “alterhuman ID” template, free to use for anyone :D the box in the right-side corner is to add the symbol of your identity (therian, alterhuman, otherkin, otherhearted, etc)

make sure you dont put any information that could put you in danger! this is just for fun and you dont need to put your actual information if u dont want to! making things up is totally okay.

also make sure to have the images full-screen if you are saving them, as it will give you the best resolution.

i edited mine in IbispaintX

“registration date” is the year i realized i was nonhuman, you can put whatever youd like

inspired by this & another i cannot find!!

Ancient realm

michael.paramonti

here are some kintype reaction images I made! First one is mine and the rest are traced over.

First one is for when you just gotta go GRERHRGRRRG!!! RRR!!! Rage kill stabbing maiming pouncing on u mauling tearing w my claws stabbing stabbing blood violence!!! Imagine the stick figure is a transphobic politician and that’s basically the mood. It’s for when mauling and biting in a werewolf feral animal way isn’t enough for me and I just gotta pounce and stab w my killing claw/raptor talon deinonychus style. The rest are for my angel kintype and last one is my vampire kintype where I get just absolutely covered in blood. Drenched little guy.