Here Is My Definitive Guide To Fucking A Daedric Prince

here is my definitive guide to fucking a daedric prince

first things first: they are not corporeal by default, they just can look humanoid if they feel like it. i understand the impulse to go jaunting off into the Evergloam like "ooOOO tiddies" but you are guaranteed nothing of the sort.

secondly: physically touching a god is not good for your health. average scenario is you wind up like your permafried weedman from college. which frankly, like... whatever. acceptable imo. If you have been kinder to your brain cells than I, you may want to think twice.

third, the daedra have pioneered heretofore undiscovered methods of fucking. you might be in for a nice human-style night of things going in/near holes, or you might be up for some incomprehensible Lilliths Brood shit. it's a coin toss and you don't get to decide where it lands but that's what you signed up for.

lastly, you gotta consider the spheres.

boethiah, malacath, mehrunes dagon, hircine, meridia: rough raw nasty sloppy sweaty woah sorry i blacked out there for a second. Probably fatal but what a way to go out

sheogorath, clavicus vile, peryite, namira: highly baroque kink. it's gonna be a whole production. bear in mind that they have eternity for elaborate foreplay while you do not. You're gonna have to top from the bottom if you want to get off before you're a hundred years old. good luck with that.

azura, mephala, nocturnal: ideal if your sexuality is abstract and esoteric. you will nut harder than you ever have nutted in your life, yet have no idea how it happened

vaermina, hermaeus mora, sanguine: you might not like what you find out about yourself. too bad! it's your whole thing now and nothing else will do

jyggalag: 90 seconds of missionary PIV, which is adequate for the purposes of reproduction

*bangs gavel* i hereby declare my post complete, my logic faultless, and my person objectively correct. I will hear no further arguments

Commissions Are Open!

I’ve made a commissions blog! You can find it here. It has an archive of all my posted work, as well as all the important info you need to know. Here’s a quick rundown if you don’t want all the details:

I’m charging (USD)$1/100 words. You can choose to pay through paypal or ko-fi.

I’m able to write on lots of topics and fandoms, make character sheets, bios, headcanons, imagines,and even write for your OC’s and other original ideas!

Examples of My Work: 1, 2, 3 (I’m still working on building up an archive!)

My Ko-fi

Feel free to contact me! I look forward to making your ideas come to life! I’m starting with writing for now, but I plan to do some art in the near future.

Why am I doing this?

Well, I’d like to tell you it’s because I love making art and writing – and I do! But the simple reason is: I have a whole list of physical and psychological ailments as well as a few personal responsibilities to my family (like helping take care of my bed-ridden grandmother 24/7) that prevent me from working a normal 9-5 job.

I live in a low-income household, and I’d love to be able to help my family out any way that I can. The financial situation of my household can be…Incredibly stressful, to say the least.

I’d appreciate if you could share this and spread it around, even if you can’t or don’t want to commission me personally. I have a very small following and can’t reach as many people as I’d like to. Please help me out.

18 notes View Post

inferno-universe

1 year ago