đź–¤

đź–¤

It is sad how an everlasting grief is forced upon us. We did not choose this, we were made like this. You can get out of an abusive relationship, but how do you find an out with a physically overwhelming and emotionally draining relationship with your own parents? Nobody ever wrote a guide to surviving that. And how it can crush your soul with agonising pain, a lot harder than any heartbreak or death can bring. I have mastered the art of detachment but this is the battle I do not know how to win. I feel more like a stranger to my parents than any other stranger I meet on the sidewalks.

- Ax

More Posts from Individual-prisoner and Others

2 years ago

đź’® I've always had the best way with my words. I like the way they keep translating my own mind when my toungue is unable to speak out for me. Words have always been keeping me a step forward into presenting myself from being passive and existing in my life that I was forcibly given to.

They're always narrating and whispering those wispy tails of my mind to me. I would've never known how my life sounds like.They define me, describe me, they're always expressing the spalshes of my tears or the turbulent surge of emotions on behalf of me, with their only assurance to me that I'm not insane, or losing my mind.

They said that's what happens to humans when we live on our limitations, always.đź’®

đź’® I've Always Had The Best Way With My Words. I Like The Way They Keep Translating My Own Mind When

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2 years ago

Hehe🌚 <333

🌷 here is a flower for anyone not feeling their best today

2 years ago

A handy list of poisons for writing reference, provided to you by me, Bella

Poisoning is one of the oldest murder tactics in the books. It was the old equalizer, and while it’s often associated with women, historically men are no less likely to poison you. This is not a guide on how to poison people, you banana bunches, it’s a guide on writing about poisons in fiction so you don’t end up on a watch list while researching them. I’ve taken that hit for you. You’re welcome. These are just a few of the more classic ones.

Hemlock: Hemlock (conium maculatum) is one of the more famous ones, used in ancient times most notably in Socrates’ forced suicide execution. So it goes. The plant has bunches of small, white flowers, and can grow up to ten feet tall. It’s a rather panicky way to die, although it wouldn’t show: hemlock is a paralytic, so the cause of death is most often asphyxiation due to respiratory paralysis, although the mind remains unaffected and aware.

Belladonna: Atropa belladonna is also called deadly nightshade. It has pretty, trumpet-shaped purple flowers and dark, shiny berries that actually look really delicious which is ironic since it’s the most toxic part of the plant. The entire plant is poisonous, mind you, but the berries are the most. One of the most potent poisons in its hemisphere, it was used as a beauty treatment, so the story says, and rubbed into the eyes to make the eyes dilate and the cheeks flush. Hench the name beautiful lady. The death is more lethargic than hemlock, although its symptoms are worse: dilated pupils, sensitivity to light, blurred vision, tachycardia, loss of balance, staggering, headache, rash, flushing, severely dry mouth and throat, slurred speech, urinary retention, constipation, confusion, hallucinations, delirium, and convulsions. It’s toxic to animals, but cattle and rabbits can eat it just fine, for some reason. 

Arsenic: Arsenic comes from a metalloid and not a plant, unlike the others here, but it’s easily the most famous and is still used today. Instead of being distilled from a plant, chunks of arsenic are dug up or mined. It was once used as a treatment for STDs, and also for pest control and blacksmithing, which was how many poisoners got access to it. It was popular in the middle ages because it looked like a cholera death, due to acute symptoms including stomach cramps, diarrhea, confusion, convulsions, vomiting, and death. Slow poisoning looked more like a heart attack. The Italians famously claimed that a little arsenic improved the taste of wine.

Strychnine: Strychnine (strick-nine) is made from the seed of strychnos nux vomica and causes poisoning which results in muscular convulsions and eventually death through asphyxia. Convulsions appear after inhalation or injection—very quickly, within minutes—and take somewhat longer to manifest after ingestion, around approximately 15 minutes. With a very high dose, brain death can occur in 15 to 30 minutes. If a lower dose is ingested, other symptoms begin to develop, including seizures, cramping, stiffness, hypervigilance, and agitation. Seizures caused by strychnine poisoning can start as early as 15 minutes after exposure and last 12 – 24 hours. They are often triggered by sights, sounds, or touch and can cause other adverse symptoms, including overheating, kidney failure, metabolic and respiratory acidosis. During seizures, abnormal dilation, protrusion of the eyes, and involuntary eye movements may occur. It is also slightly hallucinogenic and is sometimes used to cut narcotics. It also notably has no antidote. In low doses, some use it as a performance enhancer.

Curare: Chondrodendron tomentosum is lesser known than its famous cousins, but kills in a very similar way to hemlock. It is slow and terrible, as the victim is aware and the heart may beat for many minutes after the rest of the body is paralyzed. If artificial respiration is given until the poison subsides, the victim will survive.

Wolfsbane: Aconitum has several names; Monkshood, aconite, Queen of Poisons, women’s bane, devil’s helmet) and is a pretty, purple plant with gourd-shaped flowers. The root is the most potent for distillation. Marked symptoms may appear almost immediately, usually not later than one hour, and with large doses death is near instantaneous. Death usually occurs within two to six hours in fatal poisoning. The initial signs are gastrointestinal including nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. This is followed by a sensation of burning, tingling, and numbness in the mouth and face, and of burning in the abdomen. In severe poisonings pronounced motor weakness occurs and sensations of tingling and numbness spread to the limbs. The plant should be handled with gloves, as the poison can seep into the skin.

Foxglove: Digitalis is large with trumpet-shaped flowers that can be many colors, but usually a pinkish shade. It may have from the term foxes-glew, which translated to fairy music. Intoxication causes nausea, vomiting and diarrhea, as well as sometimes resulting in xanthopsia (jaundiced or yellow vision) and the appearance of blurred outlines (halos), drooling, abnormal heart rate, cardiac arrhythmias, weakness, collapse, dilated pupils, tremors, seizures, and even death. Slowed heartbeat also occurs. Because a frequent side effect of digitalis is reduction of appetite and the mortality rate is low, some individuals have used the drug as a weight-loss aid. It looks a bit like comfrey, which is an aid for inflammation. Make sure not to confuse the two.

2 years ago

°°If you love someone

Must you know, and thus train yourself

how to live without them

simultaneously,

while willing to be together forever.

°°If You Love Someone

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2 years ago

🌟Sometimes I'm scared of how

I deny the reality and live inside my head, in the most comfortable corner I've created despite the darkness.

How complex and detailed view are there in my mind about everything I see. I'm scared to be different. Scared to fight with almost everything that's against me. One pain of being different is the fear of being lonely. But the urge never stops itself.

Sometimes I'm scared, I see I'm turning into something I shouldn't. And the scariest thing is, no one ever notices how, a complete stranger from inside, is walking around wearing the old, acquinted shell of their very own girl.

🌟Sometimes I'm Scared Of How

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2 years ago
This is what India's caste hatred looks like
A recent photo exhibition documents the prejudice that remains a reality for millions of Dalits.

BBC article on a photography exhibit highlighting families affected by anti-Dalit attacks and murders.

2 years ago

đź’®Never have I tried to rewatch my past to narrate myself. I know it's a mess, it's random, but I can feel it something beautiful. Everything fall in place just like a story. Sometimes I welcome the circumstances which fall in place. I watch, suffer, break, but never intend to mess with the sequence. The mishappenings seems beautiful in a chaotic way, and perfectly put. I think, 'Won't be a nice storyline to narrate?'đź’®

|Picture Credit : Pinterest|

đź’®Never Have I Tried To Rewatch My Past To Narrate Myself. I Know It's A Mess, It's Random, But I Can

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1 year ago

The more you grow up the more you understand, you can't be straightforward everywhere, you don't have to sugercoat things, but you need to tell truth in a way it hurts less. Logic isn't everything and some stages make us emotional. It's not people's fault that they're stupid or doesn't agree with your logic. They've lived a life very different than yours, their pattern of right or wrong with yours will match rarely or maybe later. The more you grow up, the more you ask for the things that you never loved to see in people.

The More You Grow Up The More You Understand, You Can't Be Straightforward Everywhere, You Don't Have

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2 years ago

There is no shame in needing to take a break every once in a while

1 month ago

Ahh yes.... 🔥🔥🔥❤️❤️

250214: Stress - Chungha
250214: Stress - Chungha
250214: Stress - Chungha
250214: Stress - Chungha

250214: stress - chungha

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