I-am-iron-man-3000 - Im Yr Dad

My parents don’t understand what privacy means.

They think that if they knock on my door they can open it to come in, they don’t wait for a reply or anything they just knock and then come in. Then they get mad if I lock my door for fucking privacy. Like, really? But they also get mad if I knock and then immediately come in.

How about instead of doing a live action race-swapped Ariel, Disney could do a movie about a badass siren and her pirate lover. And they’re also lesbians because it would be something new and fresh and also wouldn’t feel as forced as this new Little Mermaid is. Same thing with Peter Pan & Wendy. Like Peter Pan isn’t even fully about Wendy so why is her name in the title. Anyways Disney please do a story about a pirate and her siren siren lover.

wait if satan punishes evil people how is he bad? someone explain this to me, 11 years in a christian school have taught me nothing about this

so i got ‘Look Out For The Little Guy’ by Scott Lang recently and I brought it to school today to read when i had some free time or whatever and this boy who I sat by in homeroom saw it and was freaking out over how I got it. Long story short I think I made a boy in my class think I’m Wanda Maximoff or some sort of sorcerer who traveled the multiverse to get a book.

We need to have a nomination for “Stupidest thing Tumblr.com has ever believed” and just move into an official Top 10 List.

For my nominations, I’m putting up:

If you eat a chocolate bar a very specific way, you will break physics and get infinite chocolate.

or

It is impossible that you spelled “Berenstain Bears” wrong and is, instead, more likely that the universe fractured into separate, overlapping realities in the last 20 years.

I can’t decide which is more beautiful. It’s why we need a vote.

If you hit rock bottom, bring a shovel, don't stop digging. You can do worse

Both of my cats are named after Beatles songs

ITS OUT TODAY!!!!! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

IM SO EXCITED

new game for me: how gay can i dress and act without telling my parents I’m gay.

What the fuck is up with school uniforms? Like my school told us that “The uniforms are a practice for later in life when you need to wear a uniform to work.” Like ok, but also you tell us ‘Express yourself! Don’t listen to what other people tell you what you can and can’t do!’ and then they fucking yell at us when we wear spirit wear, like I get wanting to show school pride but I’m not going out in public in a hoodie that says my school name. I’d rather wear that in the fucking school wear it’s fucking freezing instead of your thin ass pants and sweat shirts!