Wheein đ„°
WHEEIN illella (221022)
Queen is serving
This is just the cutest everđ„°
pham hanni x fem!reader
synopsis: hanni is a terrible multi-tasker and it's very evident when her phone is in between her ear and shoulder while she orders delivery. she's messily figuring out what to tackle on her calendar first as she mumbles her order, what lecture notes to go over, when her midterms fall---and oops, she just said 'love you, bye' to the worker on the other end of the phone.
warnings: none(?) i think it's just rly silly and cute and fluffy ; anything else i didn't mention ; not proofread
a/n: ugh she's so cute and such a loser and UGH anyways i wrote this so quickly but maybe that's because i love thsi fic so much it was so so so fun to write omfg ENJOY!!
hanni is a terrible multitasker, it only ends up in her getting things mixed up and done slower. still, she does it anyway.
her phone is tucked awkwardly between her ear and shoulder, fingers tapping at the laptop keyboard while scrolling through lecture notes. âuh, yeah⊠chicken lo mein with extra chicken⊠and um alsoâŠâ she squinted at the calendar on her screen. âwhat was i supposed toâ oh, right⊠midterm next wednesday. right, cool.â
on the other end you listened patiently, smiling to yourself and holding back a small giggle as she mumbled half an order while clearly being busy with other things.
âwait, sorry!â she apologizes quickly, realizing she hadnât ordered what minji and haerin had asked for. âalso six steamed pork dumplingsâ no, twelve please. shrimp fried rice and⊠wait, i already said that, right? ughâanyway, just, yeah, add that too.â
you ring it all up, smiling wider. âanything else?â
thereâs a brief moment of silence until you hear, âhuh? oh, no, thatâs it.â she replies absentmindedly. she had been paying no attention at all, flipping through her notes and muttering to herself quietly about what she needed to review before the weekend. âuh, yeah, thanksâlove you, bye.â
another beat of silence passes before you chime in, voice playful. âlove you too.â
you could practically hear her freeze, the realization hits her. you hear a gasp on the other end of the phone, sharp and followed by a small curse.
âw-wait, what?â hanni stammers, cheeks heating up like crazy. everything hanni had been bombarded with halts. her hands freeze on the laptop, her phone almost slips from her shoulder, and the papers she had been holding with the other hand have all landed on teh counter. everything hanni had been thinking aboutâmidterm wednesday, lecture notes, module 2.2, chapter three readingâdissapear from her mind in a blink.
she hears a laugh on the other end, then a voice that sends a shiver down her spine.Â
âyour total is $28.41, by the way.â
âgod, iâm sorry.â hanni rushes out the apology, face palming herself. âi didnât mean itâ not that i donât love you! well, i mean, i donât know you, so i donât love you. not that i hate you! no hard feelings. iâm not saying youâreâ okay iâm, iâm going to go. bye. thank you. sorry.â
hanni presses the red button on her phone, ending the call and cringing to herself. hanni is more than glad that her friends in the living room hadnât heard the most embarassing phonecall of her life. if any of them were to witness it, sheâd never live it down. her cheeks are fuming against her hand; sheâs a mess, she really needs to stop tackling twelve things at once even though it brings her some type of comfortâless chaos during lots of chaos makes it seem like something manageable.
she clicks through a bunch of tabs, skims through a few lines on her paper, and then closes her laptop. she does this while being distracted by the whole one minute interaction from earlier, shooting herself in the head mentally everytime she thinks of it.
less than twenty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up. hanni knows itâs not the person on the phone, because when the man speaks, itâs not the same voice that sent a weird shiver down her spine when she realized they said âlove you tooâ back to her.
she takes the two bags over to her living room, setting them down in front of two ravenous studentsâotherwise known as her best friends danielle and minjiâwatching their eyes sparkle just from the sight. she rolls her eyes at them, sitting down against her small couch and leaning against as they waste no time to dig in and unbox.
hanniâs the last one to reach in and grab something to munch onâmistake number one. mistake number two is catching minji furrowing her brows at a piece of paper, pickiing it up and reading, instead of stopping her before she can do any of that.
her best friend reads it outloud in a confused tone: âi put two extra fortune cookies in there,â minji begins, danielle scoots over to read too. âhope your fortune is as sweet as your voice. love, the girl you donât hate, but donât love :(â
âp.s. you sound cute when youâre caught off guard ;-)â
minji finishes reading, and then the two of her friends look up, staring down hanni.
âhanni, whatâs this?â
âiâ give me that!â hanni says, face burning up. she swipes the paper from minjiâs hand, looking at the paper and covering it with her hand like her friends hadnât just read it together. she cringes, closing her eyes and falling down on teh floor. âiâm an idiot.â
âhanniiiiiiâ danielle whines, scooting over to shake her by her shoulders while sheâs on the floor. âwhatâs that about? do you have an admirer or something?â
âi canât tell you, i just, iâm so stupid.â
âdude, what?â minji questions, completely ignoring the steaming, delicious food on the coffee table. âexplainânow.â
hanni feels her heart beating like crazy, then she gives in and sits up. her face is most definitely beet red, maybe even worse when she glances at the note again.
âi accidentally said âlove you, byeâ to the worker on the phone.â hanni says quietly, shaking her head. âand she said it back.â
âshe what?â danielle and minji say in unison, looking at her in disbelief.
hanni lets out a weird noise, overwhelmed and flustered beyond words. she looks down at the note again through the spaces in her fingers as she covers her face, not noticing any name or anything that might lead to another encounter with the mystery girl on the other end of the line. this disappoints her a bit, but even if she were to have a name or number or anything, she wouldnât be able to face you.Â
after getting teased to death, the trio indulges in food after a very long and tiring study session. the conversation shifts to annoying professors, upcoming midterms, plans for when they all have free timeâbut hanni is still thinking of you, oddly enough.
â
a little over a week from that day, hanni orders takeout again. sheâs somehow forgotten (for the most part) her embarrassing interaction, probably because her midterm is tomorrow and sheâs completely forgotten to eat. her phone sits in between her shoulder and ear again, head tilted awkwardly to rush out an order.Â
âalpha waves, altruism, anorexia nervosa⊠shit, sorry. um yeah, iâd like six steamed dumplings please, pork. umm⊠chow meinâ no, scratch that. shrimp fried rice please.â her words are hurried out her mouth as she furrows her brows at her laptop screen, clicking through slides and trying to comprehend two units of psychology in one night. âthatâs it, thank you, love you.â
hanni stops in place, frozen in shock. there is no way.
âwow, you must be smitten, huh?â she hears on the end of the line, followed by a small chuckle. âlove you too, âhp.ââ hanni had never used her full name when ordering things, well, only food. she always had this fear of sharing her legal name unless it was for unconsumable orders. âyour total is $14.89 by the way.âÂ
you hear a groan on the end of the line, followed by what sounds like pens and pencils hitting the floor.
â...you alright?â
hanni, caught off guard by the whole conversation for the most part, but also the fact that you noticed how she had just spilled half her supplies onto her apartment floor, answers with a simple, âyeah.â
âthatâs good to hear.â
âiâm really sorry, again, for the⊠you know.â
âyour undying love for me?â
âwhat?â hanni says, completely disregarding the pens, pencils, and highlighters on the floor. âi- no! no. iâm not in love with you! i didnât mean itââ
âiâm teasing, hp.â she hears the smile in your voice. âwould you like an extra fortune? last time i had heard from you i remember something about a midterm.â
âyou remembered?â it sounds a little pathetic, maybe desperate coming from hanni, but hanni couldnât care less. sheâs tired, overwhelmed, and has gone over so much work in the span of a few days that she really canât think or function correctly.
âyeah, not many people sound as young as you. itâs usually a parent or something ordering for their family at this time. plus, you made my shift.â you confess, âi thought it was cute, you know, how frantic you had ordered your meal.â
âiâm really sorry about that, like seriously, iâm really, really sorry.â
âitâs okay hp.â
âright, yeah. i uh, i have to study. sorryâ i donât know why iâm saying sorry, ugh, sorry. thanks, bye.â
âno âlove you?ââ you ask, and before hanni can answer you respond, âkidding. iâll throw in two fried wontons, have a good night hp.â
the call ends and hanni blinks a few times as she tries to process what just happened. sheâs embarrassed beyond words, just as flustered too. there might even be a blush on her cheeks, she canât stop thinking about how smooth you were with your teasing, plus the way your voice sounded.Â
hanni thinks itâs the midterm getting to her, the stress. she cleans up the mess on the floor and goes through her vocabulary notes. she hears a knock on the door twenty minutes later which makes her jump in her seat.
she grabs the bag of fried rice and dumplings, placing it on the counter before taking everything out. hanni hears her stomach rumble a bit, she definitely underestimated how hungry she was.
before hanni digs in, she notices two fortune cookies and a note at the bottom. she completely ignores the cookies, grabbing the note and opening it up to see the same small handwriting from last time:
âiâm guessing your initials are hp? i could be wrongâŠÂ
hp like harry potter? it makes sense because youâre magical.
good luck on your midterm! hopefully youâll order for a post-midterm celebration.
p.s. there are extra fried wontons ;pâ
hanni smiles as she reads the note. pause. hanni stops smiling immediately when she becomes aware of the fact that sheâs smiling because of a note. a note from a mystery woman on the other end of the line.
â
midterms are over, all of them. hanni had gone through all four midterms. all four. hanniâs burnt out to oblivion, finding comfort in her bed as soon as she gets back from her last midterm. she checks her messages and is greeted by the groupchat sheâs in with danielle and minji.
minji: FINALLY i feel like a fish thatâs been gutted out itâs not even finals lowk wasnât even that bad actually how about you guys
danielle: my midterm is in an hour! wish me luck :D how was yours hanni?
hanni: iâm about to PASS OUT why did i choose forensics
minji: because youâre a nerd donât let one biology midterm screw you over whoâs going to take care of my body parts when i suddenly get murdered
danielle: woah quite a situation, no?
hanni: uagghshhskafhjk iâm going to sleep GOODNIGHT do you guys want to come over later dani do you need time to unwind before you come over
danielle: no thatâs alright! i find your apartment quite cozy iâll just crash there right after, thanks han okay iâm going to review a bit more wish me luck!
minji: good luck mo dani!! you can do it we love you
hanni: good luck! youâve got this
danielle: â€ïž
hanni smiles at danielleâs message, sheâs always so positiveâeven through text, even during these trying times. she decides to pass out for almost two hours, waking up groggy and finding herself almost tripping all the way back to her couch in the living room. she sighs as she collapses onto the cushions, waiting for minji and danielle to come over.
then her thoughts race back to you, embarassingly enough. she thinks about your stupid flirting, your stupid voice, and the stupid giggle she could hear through the phone. she thinks about how stupid she is for smiling, how stupid she is. everything is stupid.
hanni is fantasizing about some random person sheâs ordered affordable chinese food from, she doesnât even know her name.Â
(hanniâs brain is mush.)
instinctively, she goes through her recent calls, dialing the number of the restaurant that serves her favorite dumplings.Â
it rings for a few seconds before someone answers, âhello?â
the voice isnât familiar whatsoever, hanni feels a strange discomfort in her stomach.Â
hanni doesnât realize that she hasnât spoken a word until the second âhello?â is uttered. she breaks from her trance.
âhi, hello, yeah, hi.â
âhello, what can i get you?â
hanni purses her lips before replying, âoh, um.â she sounds like a sad child. âfried rice, iâll do chicken. wontons, fried, twelve of them. could i also get beef-broccoli lo mein?â
she hears nothing for about three seconds, then a hum. âgot it, could i get a name for that order?â
âhp.âÂ
ây/nâs âhp?ââ who the hell is y/n? hanni thinks to herself.Â
âwhat?â
ânevermind.â the worker says with her monotone voice. âwill that be it?â
âyeah, thank you.â hanni doesnât say âlove youâ this time. she tells herself itâs because sheâs not preoccupied with at least three things in that same moment, but a part of it is because itâs not the same voice that she had been expecting to hear. âwhatâs the total?â
â$24.12. itâll be over in a little more than twenty minutes.â
âokay, thank you.â hanni says, and instead of hearing something snarky backâshe hears a hum, and then the call ends.
âŠ
you walk into work later than usual, one of your midterms had been pushed a bit later, so your hours were cut off.Â
as you walk in, you catch your coworkerâs head snap up. as soon as she realizes itâs you, she relaxes a bit.
âgood evening haerin!â you beam, somehow upbeat and lively even after your grueling calculus midterm. âmiss me?â
âjust had to take more calls than i ever do in one week.â she sighs, watching you move over behind the counter and push your bag under the desk. âso maybe a little.â
âawww, you missed me so much.â
âshut up.â haerin groans, sitting down in the little chair where no customers can catch her. âyou know what you missed?â
âwhat?â
âyour girlfriend calledâmiss hp.â
âhp?!â you say it like youâve just missed the train that comes every two hours. âseriously? did she say âlove you?ââ
âof course thatâs what youâre so animated about.â haerin rolls her eyes at you, shrugging. âshe didnât.â
a sigh of relief escapes your lips, a very exaggerated one for that matter. then you frown, sitting down in the spinny chair nearby and rotating yourself in your seat like a little kid.
âi canât believe i missed her.â
âyouâre actually insane for flirting with a customer.â
âshe has a cute voice.â
âyou donât even know her y/n.â haerin scoots over, but only to flick you in the forehead. she leans back in her seat, smirking. you rub your skin and pout at her, making her roll her eyes once more before she continues on, âshe could be old, crinkly, and married or something. what if sheâs like⊠balding? what if her teeth are falling out and sheââ
âwhy are you assuming the worst haerin. youâre soâ whatever. she sounds my age, i guess. itâs just fun to mess around, itâs cute.â
âi will never get you.â your coworker crosses her arms, jumping at the sound of the phone ringing. âcould you get that? iâve run out of social battery.â
âitâs a phone call haerin.â
âtalking to you drained me already.â
you frown, making her giggle at you.
â
the next time hanni calls is two days later, because sheâs a loser that canât seem to get the thought of the chinese restaurant employee who keeps flirting with her (albeit smoothly) out of her head. the phone rings twice, then someone picks up, and hanni waits eagerly.
âhi, pledis plates, how can i help?â itâs you, itâs you. the memory of hearing ây/nâs hp?â pops up in her headâcould you be y/n? you have to be.
âhi.â hanni says simply, biting the inside of her lip. she hears a small chuckle on the other end of the line, slightly relieved.
âif it isnât hp.â it comes out cheeky, making hanni blush. âmissed you, you know?â
âwhat?â
âdid you miss me too?â
âiââ yes. hanni did miss you, not like sheâd admit it, at least out loud. âiâd like to order dumplings.â
âharsh.â you respond jokingly, âsix, pork, and steamed, got it.â
âyou memorized it?âÂ
âyou ordered it last time.â
hanni canât help but laugh, smiling as she holds the phone against her ear. âyou must be head over heels to be remembering my order.â
âyouâre the one who confessed first though?â
âthat was a mistake.â
âuh huh.â amusement is laced in your tone. âitâll be five dollars, should be there in less than twenty.â
âgreat.â
 hanni doesnât know what else to say. you both pause, letting silence and the faint static ring in your ears.
âwhat happened to the usual goodbye?â
hanni feels herself shrinking in her bed, feet kicking slightly, blush forming. god, sheâs head over heels, sheâs insane, she doesnât know a single thing about you other than the fact that you have a really endearing voice and that your flirting is enough to have her smiling like an idiot.
âthanks, bye.â neither of you hang up after hanni says it, knowing thereâs something missing. hanni pinches the bridge of her nose, feeling her stomach closing in on herself and simultaneously doing a flip. her heart nearly jumps out of her chest as she chokes out, âlove you.â
âi was waiting for that one.â
âa-are youâ really?â
âyeah.â you simply state, and you say nothing else but, âbye hp.â
âyouâre not going to say it back?â
you grin to yourself. hanni hears a small, amused laugh fromthe other end, sending a shiver down her spine. âi donât fold that easy, maybe next time.â you hang up right after, leaving hanni dumbfounded.
hanni looks at her phone like youâre going to call back, but you donât. she drops the phone on her bed, putting both hands over her face and feeling her skin burn against her palms. she groans, then groans again, and sighs finally.Â
maybe next time. thereâs going to be a next timeâhanni has that at least.
â
hanni calls again the next monday, around two days after the last call. itâs the same day she had first said the infamous âlove youâ to you on accident. she calls at around the same time, laptop on her lap as she taps lightly on the backspace key, though not enough to actually press it. she wonders to herself for a moment, is the dent in her wallet really worth it? has she really reached rock bottom?
âpledis plates, what would you like to order?â
itâs not you. hanni sinks into the cushion of her couch and feels herself deflate. she canât always call with the assumption that youâll pick up, there are other employees after all. this time, itâs the same monotone voice she had heard before, a stark contrast to your flirtatious, lively tone.
âhi, iâd just likeââ
âah, hp.â
âhow did youââ
âi remember your voice from last time. y/n was quite sad when she realized sheâd missed your call by twenty minutes.â
âwhat do you mean?â
âshe came into work late, midterms or something.â
midterms. the information alone gives her the assumption that youâre also in college, maybe even in her grade, and if sheâs pushing it maybe you even go to her university. she conjures up a better picture of you now, not quite clear or concrete, but itâs something.
âis she a student?â
âi donât know if i can leak that, she told me to be very secretive about her. i donât think youâll have trouble finding out more though, she never shuts up.â
hanni snickers, so youâre a talker too. yeah, hanniâs into that.
âwell now i know her name.â
âdo what you will with that.â the girl mutters. hanni hears a small sigh, then another response, âhey, y/n was curious about you. are you in high school?â
âwhatâ no! do i sound like it?â
âyou sound young.â the girl on the end of the lineâhaerinâshrugs. she continues, ây/n thinks youâre the same age as her, she also assumes youâre cute. i guess no one will know until a miracle happens.â
âi canât tell if youâre insulting me.â hanni chuckles awkwardly, but haerin doesnât respond. âbut if it helps, anyway, iâm a sophomore in college. tell her iâm interested in forensics.â
âokay.â
silence follows again, but haerin hasnât hung up, and hanni still holds the phone against her ear expecting something more. hanni decides to take another step, asking, ây/n, how is⊠could you like, describe her?â
âphysically orâŠ? well, i can do a brief description. to start off: annoying, jokes a lot, pretends to be all mopey when insulted. physically: taller than meâiâd say taller than a lot of women. she has a nice smile i guess, but itâs the kind you want to wipe off her face, ugh, itâs like sheâs making fun of you when she does it. her hair is also always a little messy, she says its for the âappeal,â but i see none.â
hanni fights back a giggle. this woman has just spilled a good amount, a perfect amount in hanniâs eyes (any amount is alright, anything more than a name). this ây/nâ is tall, taller than most women, and hanni is shorter than most; hanni is into that, she loves taller girls. and messy hair too? thatâs cute, probably. as long as itâs not the same type of messy that men rock aroundâmen that barely shower or do anything. essentially: compsci majorsâthen hanni will be alright. you sound wonderful.
âdid you want to order anything? or are did you just want to flirt with the idiot.â
âhey! hey, hey. lets notâ ugh, okay, could i just get um, six pork dumplingsâsteamed.â
âokay.â the girl says quietly, and then hanni hears some light tapping. âsix dumplings for hp.â
âhanni. itâs hanni. my name is hanni.â
âgot it the first time.â
âyouâre bright, arenât you?â
âyour order is going to be there later, bye.â and then the girl hangs up, leaving hanni speechless.
â
hanni waits a few days to call, because she doesnât remember dialing on tuesdays or wednesdays and hearing a voice that brings her a little thrill. she leans against her counter waiting for a response, then lights up when she hears,
âpledis plates, how can i help?â
ây/n.â hanni says, almost relieved. âhi.â
âhi hanni.â your coworker mustâve leaked that conversation, hanni thinks. ânice to hear from you.â
âlikewise.â
âcan i get six dumplings? pork andââ
â---steamed, yes.â youâre smiling as you say it, like an eager little child. ânothing else?â
âno.â
âalright.â you respond, clicking two tabs and ringing up her order. you donât give her the cost or anything, staring at the screen and deciding to huff out, âforensics?â youâre starting a real conversion now, what a step.
hanni is smiling hard, sheâs so giddy that sheâs twirling a piece of hair around her pointer finger.Â
âyeah, i think itâs nice.â
âcute.â you mumble, âiâm studying kinesiology.â
âis that so?â
âunfortunately.â you say lightheartedly. hanni doesnât know what to respond with, she wants to continue the conversation and hear your voice longer, but thereâs nothing she can think of. does she ask for your number? how you are? hanni is useless, sheâs always been useless when it came to girls.
âhanni?â
ây-yes?â hanni cringes at the slight stutter.
âyour total is five dollars. itâll be there soon.â
âoh,â hanni says sadly, âi mean, um. okay.â
and then she hangs up, a little defeated, but thereâs always a next timeâŠright?
when her food gets there, she hurriedly pays the delivery driver, making her wallet cry even more. thereâs a note in the bag, along with two fortune cookies. the note has your name and a number on it, making hanni gasp and smile to herself again. thereâs a little âtext me, miss hanni. iâm looking forward to it.â and as soon as hanni reads it, she clasps her hands together, squeals quietly into them, giggles, and kicks her feet in the air.
hanni tries to do some schoolwork, managing to get ten minutes of reading down, a few sentences jotted down, and then the rest of the time sheâs thinking about her new saved contact. she hasnât texted you yet, mainly because she had been overthinking about what and when to text you. she contemplates texting danielle and minji about it, but sheâd just be teased.Â
this is the first time in a while since hanniâs gotten anywhere close to something romantic, or maybe this is platonic, but the flirting doesnât support that idea. sheâs tried tinderâonce, once and never againâand going to parties. nothing works out, none of them make her giddy and giggly like this.Â
before she knows it, two hours have passed, and so she decides to send a simple âhi, this is hanni!âÂ
too enthusiastic? too bland? too basic? ugh. hanni groans, lying on her couch in an uncomfortable position.
you reply almost immediately with âhey, iâm off in twenty minutes. letâs call?â and hanni has to put the phone to her chest, looking up at the ceiling in disbelief.
twenty minutes passes by too quickly, hanni hasnât even figured out what to say. she looks at her phone, waiting for you to call, and when you do, she short circuits; hanni drops her phone on her face.
âhello?â itâs you.
itâs you.
âhey. um, how was work?â
âaw, even asking me about work.â she can hear the smirk in your tone, rolling her eyes as she smiles to herself. âit was fine, my favorite part was when this girl ordered pork dumplings though. she has a cute voice.â
âis that so?â
âyeah. hey, can i ask you something?â
âwhat is it?â
âi work tomorrow, but its the morning shift. i end at one, i was you know⊠wondering if you⊠wantedâŠâ you sound nervous, this is a first for hanni. âif you wanted to share some dumplings, free of charge.â
hanni covers her mouth almost immediately, suppressing any signs of her freaking out.
âare you asking me out?â
âonly if you say yes.â
you hear a giggle before you hear a âyes.â
âreally?â
âmhm.â hanni smiles again, thinking of something thatâll leave you just as flustered. âokay, well⊠iâll see your tomorrow. bye, love you.â
âlove you too hanni.â
â
minjiâs usually the one who picks up orders if itâs not delivery, and hanni is almost always taking the orders. so when hanni enters the shop for the first time, sheâs quite fond of the smell of ingredients being stir fried or steamed, as well as the interior of the place. itâs very nice inside, hopefully the nice person sheâs been meaning to see shows up soon.
thereâs a girl by the counter, sheâs only slightly taller than hanni, and her eyes are oddly cat-like. she looks up at her with those eyes, then shoots a small smile.
âhi, how can i help?â this is who the monotone voice belongs to. her image somehow matches perfectly with the voice.
âhi, iâm hanni.â as soon as she introduces herself, the workers eyes widen.
âwoah, youâre real.â
âsurprising, i know.â
ây/n is changing in the backâshe was eager to get off fives minutes early so she wouldnât be in uniform when you showed up.â haerin explains, shaking her head. âitâs nice to meet you, youâre very pretty.â
âthank you! i appreciate it. youâre pretty as well.â
haerin doesnât get to respond. the person who does respond is the girl walking up to the register, scooting haerin to the side with her knuckles and tapping at the screen. the girl isnât in uniform, and sheâs also really good looking.Â
you run a hand through your hair as you clock out through the system. âhey, did hanni ever stop by?â you ask haerin, not looking up from the screen because youâve typed your code in wrong.Â
âlook up idiot.â your coworker snickers, and when you do, youâre met with the most gorgeous girl youâve ever seen.
you notice her right away, hair flowing down past her chest, curtain bangs perfectly framing her face. her plump lips and striking features make you pause. sure, you expected her to be prettyâmaybe even conventionally attractive, everyone is in their own wayâbut seeing her in person? sheâs beyond that, practically model material. my god. your lips part slightly in surprise, and you catch yourself, quickly swallowing as you both smile at each other at the same time.
you clock outâthankfully not typing in the wrong code again from nervousnessâand step out from behind the counter. a small tote bag hangs from your shoulder, and a plastic bag dangles in your hand. you glance down at it.
âtwelve dumplingsâsteamed, pork, everything you likeâfor the pair.â
hanniâs smile lights up her face, and you can't help but think about how adorable she looks, how effortlessly charming she is.
âwhy thank you,â she says, her voice soft and playful. it sounds better in person than through the phone.
âyouâre gorgeous, by the way,â you blurt out before you can stop yourself, still marveling at her. âlike, i expected you to be pretty, but⊠wow.â you can tell haerin is fake gagging or rolling her eyes or something like that from behind, sheâs probably already on her way to avoid witnessing this interaction.
hanni blushes instantly, the red creeping up her cheeks. if she were at home, sheâd probably be giggling and kicking her feet, but for now, she just looks away shyly, smiling. âthanks, youâre really cute too.â
âyou think?â
âyes.â she meets your eyes, still flushed. âcan we eat? iâm hungry.â
âright, yeah. i hope itâs not too forward, but is the park nearby good? we can settle down and, um⊠talk more. you know, more than just about your usual order.â
hanni laughsâyou might die right then and thereâbefore responding, âthatâs perfect,â and then she nods, looking at you. her eyes are soft and warm and wonderful.
âgreat,â you echo.
âgreat,â she repeats, a small laugh escaping her.
you both walk side by side, still a little stiff at first, the mutual attraction between you creating an unspoken tension. but as you settle into the rhythm of conversation, the initial awkwardness fades away, replaced by the easy flow of natural chemistry. each step feels lighter, the distance between you shrinking with every passing word.
â
â
â
hanni hears a knock at her door, confused because she hadnât expected any guests other than minji and danielleâwho are already in her living room leeching off her netflix account.Â
she opens it to see you, which immediately brings a smile to her face. she almost leaps over to hug you, nearly making you drop the large bag in your hand.
âsomeone missed me.â
âshut up.â hanni says before pecking your lips. she looks at you, your dorky, adorable face, and then presses another longer kiss. âcome in babe. i didnât expect you to be here.â
âi got off early because i had to cover. i wanted to surprise you, and i know you had company over.â
âoh yeah,â hanni had almost forgotten that her best friends had been there.
she leads you over, helping you take off your tote and setting it on her counter. her friends catch the two of you from their peripheral and wave, then their eyes light up at the sight of the familiar bag in your hand. you set it down, placing a the container of fried rice, lo mein, and dumpling down as they treat you like a savior.
âthank you so much, i owe you my first born.â danielle says, giving you a playful pout.
minji snickers, scooting up to the coffee table. âyouâre the best thing thatâs happened to usâto hanni.â
you look over to your girlfriend, thatâs right, sheâs your girlfriend. hanni is rolling her eyes at you, pushing your shoulder, and then pulling you in by the wrist to sit next to her. sheâs not one for pdaâespecially in front of danielle and minjiâbut under the table her fingers graze your skin, which makes you smile.
you grab a secret container from behind your back, handing it to hanni. when she opens it, she opens her mouth, shocked and grateful for the six steamed pork dumplings that you brought just for her.
pairing â idol!karina/yu jimin x idol!fem!reader
synopsis â peer pressured by your group members, you ask a fellow idol for her number. but when you texted her that night, you realised that she wasnât the person you were texting. what you didnât know was that she gave karinaâs, aepsaâs hotshot visual and leader, number to you.
genre â smau, angst, fluff, pining, strangers to friends (?) to lovers, gxg, cynic karina x hopeless romantic reader, enemies (?) to lovers
warnings â insulting, swearing, jealousy, asshole moves, (mentions of) cheating, social images, homophobia, (mentions of) alcoholism
featuring â aespa, lesserafim, yeonjun (txt), yuna (itzy), minji (new jeans), wonyoung (ive), ryujin and yeji (itzy), jeno (nct), jiwon (fromis 9), brief mentions of other idols
status â completed
playlist â
profiles â kwangyaâs residents â fearmore â the a-team
chapters â
1. from bts?? (half written)
2. snuggluffagus
3. interesting
bonus â karina?
4. free food
5. *THE* gc
6. second option
7. blondes
8. girls
bonus â y/nâs rep
9. wish you were sober
10. haha funny!
11. quit
12. zoo wee mama!!
13. rock bottom
14. pathetic
15. my slice of life
16. civil
17. awkward
18. loser (half written)
19. 7 days
bonus â late night calls (full written)
20. tipsy
21. q&a (half written)
22. the one
23. scrumptious
24. groupie
25. a date
26. wru (half written)
27. better
28. safe flight (half written)
29. the voices
30. accident
31. gf
32. backstage (half written)
33. jimin: 1
34. skidaddle (half written)
35. come over
36. soft launch
37. our endings
bonus â drama and fans
bonus â ???
ămain masterlistă
taglist â @aeongiies @rd0265667 @kyaitosz @haerinkisser @mightymyo @limbforalimb @yoontoonwhs @i06kkura @sewiouslyz @jisooftme @justme-idle @noooodlessstuff @yerisdumbass @awkwardtoafault @pandafuriosa60 @jiwoneiric @haechansbbg @koeuh @beawolfbealionbeyou @masuowo @rinapomu @1luvkarina @uzumakioden @ys-typical
đ„ș
i miss them
I love this so much!! itâs beautiful!!
summary: the earth only has one moon, are you really the moon to sana's earth?
pairing: childhood-friend!sana x fem!reader
themes: extremely angsty, best friends to ?? to ??, internalized homophobia, gender dysphoria, sana's not too great of a friend, reader is a pushover until she isn't, implied sex, original male character, [----] x reader
wc: 3.2k
(side b: north and south poles | minatozaki sana)
from what you've learned in school, at the very early age of kindergarten is that the earth only has one moon, only one. mars has two moons: phobos and deimos.
when you were kids, you were called deimos, sana was called mars, and fuji was called phobos. it was always you three together, running through the streets of the countryside of japan.
causing so much trouble for your administrators, running around yelling down the halls of your school, the terrible trio of class 2-A. leaving school was always fun too, running around for snacks and jumping at the sight of cats.
you and sana were always closer, whenever fuji had to go home early because of his strict extracurriculars, you spent time with sana. walking by the train tracks, looking for lost coins for the vending machine or even staying for dinner with sanaâs parents. it felt like it was you three taking on the small town.
until it didnât. when middle school rolled around, you were excited to see them two after a couple of weeks of summer. each of you was busy with other things in life, making it hard to meet each other. so on the first day of school, you strolled in, ready to take on the new school year with sana and fuji by your side, when you noticed they werenât talking much to each other.
fuji found basketball friends in his group, clinging to them like they were his new lifeline. sana has gotten close to the popular girls, they were nice but very superficial, all having drama with each other but in front of the group, they all faked smiles for each other.
you found yourself in between two different worlds, you tried calling to them after school, but they both dismissed you saying they had extracurriculars. fuji had gone off to play with his friends during basketball practice, while sana participated in school government association.
you got tricked into becoming treasurer for the sga that very year, so it was nice to still be around sana. although you could feel her distance.
it isnât until one spring afternoon, you feel your first ever heartbreak. sana rushes into the sga room while you were napping on a desk.
she taps your shoulder excitedly, âwake up!â
you rub your eyes and focus on sana, whoâs shoving a letter in your hand. you read the first line and yeah, your heart is crushed.
âfuji confessed to me!â she shouts excitedly, doing a little dance by herself as you read the lines.
âoh, congrats.â you hand the letter back to her, she looks at you a bit puzzled by your simple reaction.
âhe asked me out! im so excited.â she explains, going into detail about their supposed first date. âhe might kiss me, what do you think?â
âif you want to kiss him, then kiss him.â
she rolls her eyes at that, of course she knows that. thatâs not what sheâs implying.
âwhat i mean is, iâve never had my first kiss! i donât know what to do.â she goes on, thinking about it seriously. âwhat if he kisses me, and i suck and he doesnât want to kiss me.â
âsana, if he thinks you being a bad first kisser is a deal breaker then dump him.â
you explain, placing your head back on your arms.
âyou have to help me!â
âhelp?â
âkiss me, pretend youâre fuji.â
âno way sana.â
âwhy? too much of a chicken to kiss me?â
âno im not!â
"bawk bawk bawk" sana mocks you. making flapping arm motions to imitate a chicken.
âfine!â you hold yourself together (as much as you can) and place your lips gently against sana, pulling her in by the neck. caressing her cheek before letting her go. her eyes are dazed.
âwow yeah, that was good.â she fiddles with her school skirt, âi wish you were a boy, youâd make a girl very happy kissing her like that.â she blushes and leaves you alone, you feel that jagged break in your heart tear a little longer.
your tears don't stop as you try and go back to taking a nap, feeling your breathing getting heavy and you stay the rest of the afternoon, crying about not being born a guy for sana.
--
that was the last time you really talked to sana, too hurt that you cut your hair short the next day in the bathroom sink. crying tears into the porcelain bowl, with tears filling around your choppy hair. when you finally stop, you try liking the idea of it being short like a boys. but sana doesnât spare you a glance. suddenly the hair feels too choppy and the air that you didn't feel when your hair was long starts to bother you.
it doesn't bother you for long, once your hair grows back. it feels right, like you were meant to look this pretty and feminine. you stay away from both sana and fuji as much as you can.
until one day sana knocks rapidly at your door, you haven't had her over in years. high school created even more distance between you two, you found your own people to be around. people that never overlapped with sana and fuji.
--
until you see sana staring at you from across the door, eyes still sparkling as they always have, in that charming look. and the longer face, the warm smile and comforting scent of flowers. as much she is the sana you remember, you don't think she's the same sana you once knew.
"hi."
"hi sana, are you okay?" you let her in. and it's like you're transported back to when you were thirteen, letting sana come over whenever she needed to complain about fuji and his "boy" tendencies. now that you're both 18 and ready to set off into the real world, you feel a little strange having sana visit.
"yeah, i need your help." she starts, dropping her bag onto the floor. you feel your heart rate spike a bit, was sana in trouble?
"help with what?" you offer her a bottle of her favorite drink, royal milk tea.
"you remembered." she says softly, grabbing it and downing it in a few quick seconds, a sign she's nervous and with the tapping of her foot. you're feeling anxious just at the sight. "fuji asked to have sex."
you nearly spit out your own water, "what?" your eyes are wide and you stare at sana as she keeps her eyes away from you.
"i need your help."
"did he do something sana? i'll kill him myself." you get up.
"no, none of that. i want to, have sex i mean. i just can't with him first."
"why not?"
"well, i...i want my first time to not be him. i just know it in my heart."
"okay. so how am i supposed to help you?"
"be my first."
"sana! you can't ask that of me."
"why not? we're best friends, of course we can."
"sana no, you love fuji, he should be your first if you love him. you're dating him too, that would be cheating."
"i dont, i dont think, i just." she shakes her head. "it can't be with him first." she ends it softly, hands in her lap. looking like she's been scolded. you feel the guilt bubbling up in your stomach; here she was being vulnerable, and you just accused her of being a cheater.
"what's really going on?" you ask, she's not making sense anymore.
"i need you to be my first, i want you to be. it can't be anyone else." sana is firm. standing up and taking your hands in hers. with her eyes looking into yours like that, like she knows how much you love and adore her. you can't find yourself to say no, even if it betrays fuji.
"okay."
"yeah?" her eyes light up.
"yeah." you pull sana upstairs, and begging her to forget about fuji, just for one night. to only focus on you and to pull out those pretty sounds of sana uttering your name into the night.
you don't stop until you feel sana against you, like it's where she belongs, right in your arms.
--
when sana leaves in the morning, you feel that gash that you've been trying so hard to heal get ripped apart again. she thanks you like you're someone who was there to provide a service to her, like that's the only purpose you served her that night.
as if you didn't pour your heart out as you kissed down her torso, cherishing her body like the gods sculpted it. as if she isn't the only woman in the world, you begin to think maybe that's what you were made for. someone to exist for sana, and never with her.
this hurtful thought bumps around your brain, hitting every surface of it, you feel your heart break into two. like you're led on a leash by sana, without her letting you ever leave.
it becomes a habit, a habit you can't break. you circling between the sana and fuji whenever it was the holidays or birthday parties. each year you feel more and more of your soul slip away. you can't begin to tell where your identity begins and ends without sana.
doesn't help that fuji is a good man for sana. always considerate and careful, giving her the space and time she needs when she's overwhelmed. you think sana chose well, a good man in her life that'll never waver his loyalty for her.
but it leaves you in disarray, sana contacting you for her relationship problems. leaving fuji all alone as she calls you to escape. weeks spent away from fuji, where you two meet hidden away from the world. a hidden place filled with drunk kisses and hookups, ones you would never utter to fuji.
you being invited at her parties, seeing his arms draped around her like you weren't caressing them just days ago. it's all too much, you don't know if you can be friends with her. ever again.
until she marries fuji, she hands you their invitation card herself. how dare she? after years of being a secret she hands you a knife for you to stab into your heart, and she does it with a smile. explaining how happy she is to have the wedding of her dreams, while you feel the woman of your dreams slip right through your fingers.
but then the reality hits, she was never yours to begin with, you two are simply friends. just best friends that know each other's bodies too well.
you play your part well, giving a dedicated speech to them two. reminiscing of the early days of you as a trio. days of mischief, talking about learning of their feelings for each other, making jokes about how they were polar opposites, destined to find each other magnetically. you leave out the part where you think you would fit well with sana even if you aren't the opposing magnet.
you try and stay away from her as much as you can after the wedding, to save your own heart (as much there is left). blocking her number and taking time away from japan. going overseas to travel, and it works out well, you meet a woman named momo, you don't mention the woman to sana. you don't hear from sana and you feel your heart calm a bit, like it's finally able to take a break.
when you return to japan, you find her at your doorsteps, fallen asleep at your door. she wakes up to the sight of you and hugs you immediately, complaining about how worried she was that you disappeared. you don't mention how you blocked her number. letting sana into your apartment and she drops the biggest news on you that you could ever expect: shes pregnant.
"congratulations sana!" you fake a smile and she goes on to explain that it's going to be a little girl. and she's so excited to dress her up and have a daughter.
you feel like you're hearing static noise as she goes on, sitting on your couch talking animatedly about the new nursery and all the books she's been reading about motherhood. it isn't until she finally steps away to go home that you realize that you never said more than congratulations.
--
months later, she births the beautiful baby girl. you wait outside the room, a balloon in one hand and a pack of diapers in the other. the nerves of having to see sana after so long made you vomit in the hospital bathroom just ten minutes ago. you try to focus on anything else, the sterile walls, the smell of sanitizer, the sounds of nurses chatting. then you see fuji step outside, looking like a tired first-time father.
"congratulations fuji!" you say as you pass him the diapers. he laughs at the sight and thanks you before saying he's going outside to get some food and that sana is awake.
you step into the hospital room and hear the rhythmic heart monitor and low beeps of machines. there sana is, exhausted as ever but happily babbling to her baby. you can see the little baby in the swaddle. you walk up to the bedside.
"hi sana, congratulations on your new baby." you tie the balloon to her bed, and she smiles at you, tired but always warm. "she's beautiful, sana." you wash your hands and poke at her cheek.
"isn't she? i think it's too early to say, but she might have my eyes." you look back down and see the baby, eyes closed in bliss. you think they look like sana's too. ones that you used to look at as kids.
"i want to name her after you." she starts, gently caressing her head. you stop, leaning back quickly.
âdont do that sana, donât give it the same curse you gave me.â you bite out. sana stops caressing the baby's face to look at you. âforced to love someone who will never love them back.â
"what are you talking about?" sana says gently, you've never raised your voice at her in all the years you've known each other.
"sana, you can't give her my name. i forbid you to." you say sternly; after how much she destroyed you, you're not letting her name her daughter that.
"but, why?" she's still perplexed, eyes wide.
"it's not right." you look away from sana, years of pain resurfacing just at the idea. "you really hurt me, i don't want you to name your daughter after me."
she doesn't press you on the matter anymore, anxious eyes darting all over the room, trying to find an escape from this conversation.
"what about being her godmother?"
"i'm moving away sana."
it's like the final nail in the coffin, both phrases being said at the same time. you realize there's no other way to say it, not over text or a call. it's better to say it here, ripping off the bandaid completely.
"moving? where are you moving?" you can hear the heartbeat machine beeping faster, and you see her heart rate climbing steadily.
"korea, i got a job over there." you say dismissively.
"oh wow, when do you move?" sana's voice is timid as she tries to hold back tears at the idea.
"i leave in a week." you say, picking your stuff up getting ready to leave. "congratulations again sana, your baby is beautiful and healthy. tell fuji that he'll be a good father, i know it." and with that you step to leave, and just as you turn the knob you can hear it, the sound of sana crying.
you try not to cry yourself, but you can't stay here. orbiting around two people who are building their life together. you weren't supposed to be here to begin with. earth never had two moons. you nearly bump into fuji when he opens the door.
"oh fuji, i'm sorry i couldn't stay long." you offer when you see him outside, food in hand and excited to talk to you, he smiles sadly. giving you a hug as you walk outside.
feeling like for once you control your own life, your love is yours, and no longer sana's.
"stay a while longer, sana is so excited to see you!" he says, trying to urge you to come back inside.
"it's okay, we'll see each other around." you turn to look back at sana, and she stares right into you with tears running down her face and glaring at you. you just told your final lie to sana, closing the door behind them, like you closed your relationship with sana.
--
you don't see sana for years; it's strange. growing up with so much hurt and pain made it difficult to enjoy your romantic relationships, but you realize there is always a person for you, yours being hirai momo, not sana minatozaki.
here at incheon international airport, you stretch from your seat, needing to get some movement in before you sit in that cramped airplane seat for hours. so you make a beeline to the bathroom, walking directly into a young girl.
she falls backwards, nearly hitting her head on the floor, but you catch her in time.
"hi sweetie you okay?" you pat her down, pulling her shirt down. she nods at you and you see her eyes, and you feel your memories shift back to when you were five years old, meeting that girl that sat near you in class 2-A. she runs towards someone.
you stand up and recognize those eyes immediately, sana minatozaki in the flesh after five years. eyes wide as she stares at you. fuji right by her side.
you can see the recognition in sana's eyes. you walk right up to them, offering the couple a hug. sana's arms grip onto you so tightly you feel your ribs in her hold. then you feel a tug at your pant leg.
you turn around and smile at the girl by your leg.
"say hi hana, this is sana and fuji." your little girl waves to them hi, while sana is still staring at you. fuji starts congratulating you, excited to see that you have a daughter. you let out a laugh. then you feel a pat on your back, with momo walking up to kiss you.
then you let your daughter down to play with sana's daughter. eyes fond at the two little girls chasing after each other.
âitâs been a while.â sana's voice cuts into your thinking.
âyeah, i guess it has.â you reply, finally looking at her after so long. sana gulps, willing the tears away.
"honey, youâre crying.â fuji says wiping away sana's tear, you smile at that. he's good for her.
âoh i didn't notice.â sana laughs, rapidly wiping her tears away.
you let the three of them talk, momo joining in and introducing herself. you're left feeling a bit better about your decision to leave sana's side all those years ago. waiting for her to love you back would've costed your relationship with momo, especially since you would have never had hana.
it's important to know when being friends turns into we can't be friends anymore.
--
a/n: hehehehehe, angst is so fun to write, that's probably why it's everywhere in my writing. thank you to the anon who requested this! i wrote this in like 6hrs. stay safe and stay healthy everyone!
Thank you for the tag :D
I really feel like the Buttercup reflects my mood this morning and I donât even bake XD
đ·ïž @alcoholfreenayeon @myoui-rkive +anyone that wishes to join :D (no pressure)
search up these things on Pinterest and chhose the first option!
animal, place, plant, character, season, hobby, color, and drink!
tagging:@leaderwon @ynsvnte @jaeyunluvr @glitterjay @okwonyos @okwonyo @fakeuwus +anyone who wants to join! đ«¶đ»
Queen đ« đ«
MOONBYUL ëŽ ìčê”Źì ìčê”Ź ìêž°ìžë° (Is This Love) (2024)
đđđ
Hey boy! Im'ma getcha, Im'ma getcha real good and i betcha~ đ
Nayeon noooo đ
trust?
Nayeon discovers that her girlfriend, Y/N, has been hiding a serious illness, leading to a painful confrontation that threatens to break their relationship apart.
tags :: angst, illness, arguments
wc :: 1,571
cast :: nayeon, y/n
song :: waiting room - pheobe bridgers
Nayeon stands in the kitchen, her hands moving with practiced ease as she prepares dinner. The familiar sounds of sizzling vegetables and the rhythmic chop of the knife do little to calm the growing unease in her chest. Youâre lateâagain. Itâs been happening more frequently, and Nayeon canât shake the feeling that something is wrong.
She glances at the clock, her worry deepening. Over an hour has passed since you were supposed to be home. Her phone sits silent on the counter, no response to the texts sheâs sent. Anxiety gnaws at her, and she tries to push it down, telling herself that youâre just caught up at work, as usual. But a part of her knows thatâs not the full truth.
Something has been off for months. Sheâs noticed it in the way youâve been distant, the way your laughter doesnât quite reach your eyes anymore. Youâve been coming home late, your face pale and tired, the dark circles under your eyes growing more prominent. Every time she tries to ask, you brush it off, claiming itâs just stress. But Nayeon knows you better than that.
The front door creaks open, and she feels a mix of relief and dread. She turns off the stove and moves to the entrance, forcing a smile as you step inside. You look exhausted, your shoulders slumped and your skin pale, as if all the life has been drained out of you.
âHey, youâre home,â Nayeon says, trying to keep her voice light, though it trembles with worry. âI was starting to get worried.â
You offer a weak smile, but it doesnât reach your eyes. âSorry, got held up at work.â
Nayeon studies your face, her heart aching at how tired you look. She steps closer, reaching out to touch your cheek, hoping to offer some comfort, but you flinch away before she can make contact. The small movement stabs at her heart, a confirmation of the distance thatâs grown between you.
âWhatâs going on?â Nayeon asks softly, her voice filled with concern.
âNothing,â you reply quickly, too quickly, as you move past her towards the bedroom. âI just need to change.â
She follows you, her worry growing with every step. âYouâve been acting strange for weeks. Youâre always tired, youâre late, and you never tell me where youâve been. Iâm worried about you.â
You pause in the doorway of the bedroom, your back to her. âI told you, Iâm just stressed. Workâs been a lot.â
Nayeon hears the fatigue in your voice, but it doesnât explain everything. âI know work is hard, but this feels different,â she says, her voice trembling. âI feel like youâre hiding something from me.â
You donât respond, and the silence is deafening. Nayeonâs heart pounds in her chest as she waits, hoping for some kind of reassurance. But when you donât say anything, the fear sheâs been trying to suppress bubbles to the surface.
âPlease, donât shut me out,â she whispers, taking a step closer, her voice pleading.
Your shoulders tense, and for a moment, Nayeon thinks you might finally open up. But then you sigh, shaking your head.
âIâm not hiding anything,â you say, your voice flat. âIâm just tired, Nayeon. Can we drop it?â
Her heart sinks at your words. She wants to believe you, but the emptiness in your eyes tells her something else entirely. She nods slowly, swallowing the lump in her throat.
âOkay,â she murmurs, though it feels like a lie. âIâll go finish dinner.â
You donât say anything as you walk into the bedroom, closing the door behind you. Nayeon stands there for a moment, staring at the closed door, feeling the weight of everything unsaid between you.
As she turns to head back to the kitchen, something catches her eye. Your bag is lying on the floor, half-open, with a small bottle of pills peeking out. Nayeon hesitates, guilt pricking at her conscience as she considers going through your things. But the worry in her chest pushes her forward.
She kneels down and gently pulls the bag open, her breath catching when she sees the bottle of pills. Her hands tremble as she picks it up, turning it over to read the label. Itâs a prescription sheâs never seen before, and the name of the medication sends a chill down her spine.
Sheâs not a doctor, but she recognizes the name. The drug is used to treat a serious, chronic illnessâsomething much more than just stress or fatigue. Her heart races as she tries to process what sheâs seeing. Youâve been taking these pills, hiding them from her, hiding your illness.
âY/N?â Nayeon calls out, her voice trembling with a mix of fear and anger.
The bedroom door opens, and you step out, your face going pale as you see the bottle in her hand.
âNayeon, I can explainââ
âExplain?â Her voice shakes, tears welling up in her eyes. âExplain what? That youâve been sick this whole time and didnât tell me? That youâve been hiding it from me?â
Your face crumples, guilt and regret etched in every line. âI didnât want you to worry,â you say, your voice breaking. âI didnât want to burden you withââ
âBurden me?â Nayeonâs voice rises, the anger taking over as she steps closer to you, her grip tightening on the pill bottle. âHow could you think that? Weâre supposed to be in this together. You donât get to decide what I can or canât handle. You donât get to shut me out like this.â
Tears begin to stream down your face as you shake your head, looking more broken than sheâs ever seen you. âI didnât want you to see me like this. I didnât want you to feel trapped, like you had to take care of me. I thought I could handle it on my own.â
âWell, you canât!â The words burst out of her, her voice cracking under the weight of her emotions. âYouâre not handling it, Y/N. Youâre falling apart, and Iâm watching you slip away from me, and I donât even know why!â
âIâm sorry,â you whisper, your voice so small, so full of pain. âIâm so sorry.â
âSorry isnât enough, Y/N.â Nayeonâs voice shakes, the hurt and betrayal cutting deep. âYou lied to me. You made me feel like I was going crazy, like I was imagining things. And now... now I donât even know if I can trust you.â
The room falls into a heavy silence, the air thick with the weight of her words. You look at her, your face crumpling as the reality of what youâve done sinks in.
âNayeon, please,â you beg, reaching out to her, desperate to bridge the gap between you. But she takes a step back, shaking her head, her heart breaking at the sight of you so vulnerable, so lost.
âNo,â she says, her voice firm even as tears blur her vision. âYou donât get to ask me to forgive you right now. You donât get to make this okay. Not after what youâve done.â
Your hand falls back to your side, and you swallow hard, tears streaming down your face. âI... I didnât know what else to do. I was scared.â
âWe could have been scared together,â she whispers, her voice barely holding together. âBut now... now I donât even know who you are anymore.â
The words hit you like a physical blow, and you almost collapse under the weight of them. The room is suffocating, filled with nothing but the sound of your ragged breaths and the unbearable tension hanging between you.
âI think you should go,â Nayeon finally says, her voice hollow, devoid of the love that once filled it. The words feel foreign on her tongue, but she canât see another way out of the spiral youâre both trapped in.
Your breath hitches, your eyes widening with a fresh wave of panic. âNayeon, please...â
âJust go,â she repeats, turning her back on you, unable to bear the sight of your shattered expression. âI need some time to think.â
You donât move at first, as if frozen in place by the realization that youâve truly hurt her, that you might have lost her. But then you take a shaky breath, forcing your legs to carry you toward the door. Each step is heavy, filled with regret and sorrow that you both know will linger long after tonight.
You reach the door, your hand grasping the handle as if itâs the only thing keeping you upright. You turn back one last time, hopingâprayingâthat sheâll stop you, that sheâll say something, anything, to make this right. But Nayeon stands with her back to you, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs.
With a sob of your own, you open the door and step out into the cold night. The door closes behind you, the sound echoing in your heart like the finality of something precious slipping away.
You walk away, the cool night air biting at your skin as tears stream down your face. You thought you were protecting her, sparing her the pain of knowing, but all youâve done is push her away. The love of your life, the one person you thought you could protect by keeping your illness a secret, is now out of reach.
As you wander aimlessly, your thoughts a whirlwind of regret and anguish, you canât help but wonder if youâve lost
She/her âą â04 âą doesnât know what sheâs doing Loves Mamamoo a lotDoesnât know why sheâs talking in third person about herself Loves reading fanfics of any girl group
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