Mood Rn 

I have this emptiness in my chest all the time and no matter what I do it just won't go away

the floor is Sam Wilson

BEFORE AN EXPEDITION — ATTACK ON TITAN.

• includes eren jaeger, armin arlert, and jean kirstein.

eren plops himself down at your feet, resting his arms on the tops of his knees as he silently offers his hair tie over his shoulder. well you do it better—that’s what he insists every time you tell him to tame that own damn mane of his—but you still fall victim every time. your fingers rake through his locks, gathering them at the back of his head.

“if i see a black flare, i’m coming straight to you. i’ll kill those abnormal bastards,” he blurts out. you loop his hair through one last time, letting the elastic smack against his head as you let go. he ignores your futile pleas of don’t do that and you can’t break the formation, rising to his feet and looming over you with hands on his hips.

he reaches for the hood of your cape, pulling it down over your face and playfully pushing your head back. he wants to tell you that you’re being stupid—wants to scream at the top of his lungs that he doesn’t care about that damn formation, he only cares about you.

you pull the fabric off with a huff, turning to face eren who now sits right beside you. he’s staring, an intense gaze that makes the heat rise to your cheeks. he runs a gentle hand along your jawline, taking in your features as if it’s the last time he’ll ever have the chance to do so.

“do you realize how important you are to me?”

armin shuffles through the crowd of scouts with little sorries and excuse me’s falling from his lips. his eyes scan through the sea of black uniforms—locking onto the familiar figure that is you—and suddenly he’s shoving the rest of his way over.

“hey, don’t forget this,” he urges, holding up a ball of green fabric in his left hand. it’s his cape—yes, his. he was the one who suggested switching them, even if they are the exact same. the way he sees it—if by some god forbidden chance he were to not make it back alive—this was the closest he could get to dying in your arms. so with one swift movement, he wraps the garment around your shoulders and fastens the button in front.

“perfect,” he says, running his hands down your arms and grabbing onto one of your hands. he gestures towards the stables with his other, a sweet little after you falling from his lips as he follows closely behind. he rests a gentle hand on your lower back as you clamber onto your horse, straining to lace his fingers with yours once you settle into the saddle.

he’s so incredibly bothered by the fact that he has a different objective than you. he hopes that one of these days you’ll hop down from your horse and say screw humanity, i’m not leaving you—but that only happens inside his selfish fantasies. so armin just holds on, for as long as he can before he’s forced to say goodbye.

“be careful out there, i need you to come back.”

jean kneels before you, angrily fiddling with one of the straps that wrap around your thighs. he’s mumbling to himself—something along the lines of come on, work with me dammit! yeah, he’s a little on edge, at no fault of your own of course.

“how does it feel? tight enough?” he tugs gently on the fabric, looking up at you for confirmation. a simple nod of your head lures him to his feet, and his features soften almost instantaneously as he grabs your hand. he brings it high above your head, forcing you onto your tiptoes as he twirls you around—a little tradition he’s adopted ever since becoming so hellbent on making sure all your gear is up to his standard.

“looks good to me,” he says, smile growing wider as you mimic his movements by holding his own hand as high as you can reach. he never thought he’d be doing this—especially with that pair of turquoise eyes searing into the back of his skull, but that look on your face, it was pure happiness—and god was it ever beautiful. so now, he spins for you every time, not an ounce of grace in his movements—but charming nonetheless.

you’re brought back to earth by the sound of the commander’s voice, a familiar heaviness greeting you both. he pulls you in for one last hug, holding onto you a little tighter than the previous time.

“hey, promise me that wasn’t the last time we get to do that.”

this family makes me want to murder people

秋芒魚路古道-擎天崗 by KC2013

succession (4x10) / the little prince, antoine de saint-exupéry

the saddest part is my mom suffered a toxic, lonely, and dehumanizing upbringing... but she doesn't understand that her trauma doesn't invalidate my trauma, it doesn't make the emotional and physical abuse she puts us through valid or okay.

i confronted her about all the arguments we've had over the years... she excused it by her injuries, and when i pointed out that this was happening prior to her injuries she said stress... it was stress, she was stressed out and that it was okay since she was stressed. she always calls it a breaking point.

i love her so much, but she scares me, and hurts me and herself.

i am afraid that ill turn into her when im older... i never want to reach a "breaking point". i never want to be like her... i understand she is a single mother, but still.