Wait, HOW Many Kids?

I forgot to add multiple just put something else

Not where you grew up. Not where you’ll be living soon. Where you’re living right now.

This is epic and I don't mean to break the mood but cowboys are very much still a thing

They outlived samurai and we cry for them 🥲

every western movie ever made: The wild west is dying. theres no more room left for cowboys anymore…

me everytime: :(

reading the wiki for the american psycho movie every single thing it’s saying about christian bale has me in tears …….. he literally wanted the role so bad he got that buff in two weeks, rejected every other offer for 9 months while the producers tried to get dicaprio to be patrick bateman bc bale knew dicaprio would chicken out, went to dinner with the director and the guy who wrote the novel IN CHARACTER apparently scaring the shit out of the novelist, took the role for $50k, and then made all his costars think he was a giant freak bc he never fucking broke character, and APARENTLY LITERALLY HAS CONTROL OVER HIS SWEAT GLANDS AND USED THIS IN THE BUSINESS CARD SCENE

A PSA about trucks from a truck driver

I and some colleagues were talking about how we wish everyone could see the safety videos that our company was showing us, because I don’t think most people understand how traffic works in a truck. So here’s some things we wish everyone on the road knew.

- we’re not kidding about tailgating. If you’re right behind us on a straight highway? Chances are we have NO IDEA you’re there, which means we can’t anticipate any of your movements. Plus slowing down takes multiple downshifts, so we might start decreasing speed way earlier than you expect.

- We’re not kidding about any of our blind spots. WE CAN’T SEE YOU, GUYS.

- That bit about slowing down taking a while? The same goes for when you’re in front of us. Don’t cut off a truck. Oh god, PLEASE don’t cut off a truck. If you cut me off, I’m not irritated, I’m terrified. For YOU. It can take 7 to 9 seconds for us to stop. DON’T CUT OFF TRUCKS.

- Before you get mad about how slow we’re going on the highway, keep in mind that many companies govern their vehicles so they literally CAN’T go over 60 or 65. This is a good thing, I promise. Because…

- Do you know what happens when a car meets a truck in an accident? The car gets totaled and the truck needs a new coat of paint. You will not win this fight. I know nobody likes getting stuck behind a big dumb truck, but it’s not worth your life.

We are trying our best to protect you from our 80,000 pound death machines. Please help us out.

Ghosts that should exist soon if not already

Notifications/typing noises in otherwise empty spaces

People waving you over from the side of the road and asking if you're their Lyft. Disappear the moment you look away

Abandoned warehouses that sometimes reverberate with an unheard bass

'Cold spots' where you can't get signal (that cannot be otherwise explained)

That dispensary with the blacked out windows? It used to be a Blockbuster until the manager got shot. If it's the right kind of night and you look real close and cup your hands to block out all the light? You can watch it happen, but they might see you

Newsletters from startups that no longer exist

Hype House haunted by the reason they had to make an apology video

Pictures of a stranger in your camera roll

At 2:30 every morning you can hear a ringing bell coming from the elementary school. Thing is, they switched to a digital tone in 2013. Also, it cannot be captured electronically

Welcome to Denny's what can I start you on? You already ordered? Wait.. Tall, pink hair? *sigh* Been dead for a mtonth and she's still stealing tips

It's fun when we do that one

IT IS TIME

pray for those who hate you

pray for those who mock you

pray for those who curse you

pray for those who belittle you

pray for those who laugh at you

pray for those who persecute you

pray for those who can't stand you

pray for those who would never pray for you.

Something massively underused is that Clark Kent is clumsy. And no, it's not an act, it's because of his superstrength and he really is clumsy. I think in the modern age of superheroes, it's been mostly abandoned. Therefore, I will be writing a story where he is even clumsier than Christopher Reeves' Superman to compensate. In fact, any story involving Superman will have this Clark Kent.

"Hey Clark! Catch!"

Just as always, the stapler Lois had thrown was not caught. Clark Kent had almost gotten it a few times, dropped it, and then tripped over his own feet. He got up and turned to Lois.

"Can't you just hand it to me?" He said. Jimmy was making no attempt to hide his giggling in the background as Clark got to his feet.

"I have to make sure you're still our old Klutz Kent, don't I? What better way?"

"Aw Lois, of course I am. Wait! Oh no! That article!"

He slipped but didn't quite fall on his way back to his desk and slid triumphantly into his chair. Everything at the Daily Planet was soon finished. Clark, Lois, and Jimmy were on their ways home when another one of those weirdos showed up from space. Jimmy and Lois remembered fondly earth's first alien invasion and how they had actually been concerned.

Meanwhile, Clark had other problems. He'd slipped into an inconspicuous Alley to change, in which there had been a small child. He held a finger to his lips and launched into the sky. It was a quick fight, and he was home only a few minutes after he was supposed to be. It was also helpful that he had needed to stop for groceries and therefore had an alibi. The 3 bags did a bit of tumbling, but the eggs remained intact.

As he finally tripped on his way into his apartment, he saw that Jimmy and Lois, instead of being at their own houses, were standing waiting for him, with notepad and camera.

"We finally have a lead" said Jimmy. "Y'know, on the Lexcorp corruption case?" Clark smiled. Maybe Luthor would finally be outed as not only a supervillain, but also- gasp- a crooked businessman.

To be continued