With Today’s Unus Annus Video About The Casket, I’m Almost 100% Sure They’re Going To Bury The

Jackie: I feel fine

Schneep: You were just stabbed!

Jackie: Don’t worry, I’ve been stabbed before

Schneep: YOU DON’T BUILD UP AN IMMUNITY TO BEING STABBED, JACKIE.

Chase: when I get murdered, can you make sure it’s an unsolved case?

Henrik: what

Chase: I wanna be on buzzfeed unsolved

Jackie: can we go back to the part where you said ‘when’ you get murdered?

Henrik: the egos are competent!

Chase, running in: Henrik! I tried to make spaghetti in the coffee pot and now everything is broken!

Henrik: what’s our escape plan?

Jackieboy-man: our what?

Chase: oh my god we’re all going to die

Marvin, rolling down the window: what seems to be the problem, officer?

Cop: get the FUCK out of my car

Marvin: it’ll be fine, you just have to seduce them.

Chase: I’m sorry, but have you seen me? I’m about as seductive as a cabbage

Chase: you okay?

Jackie: yeah, I normally spurt blood from my stomach

Anti: ILL SEE YOU IN HELL

Jackie, smacking him with a broom: TELL THEM WHO SENT YOU

Jackie: ugh, that’s the last time I go drinking with you... how’s your hangover?

Chase: pfft, amateurs, I’ve already started drinking again

Marvin: Chase, it’s nine am on a Monday

Chase: I fear nothing

Anti, scurrying across the kitchen floor with his little raccoon hands at three am: WHERE is the appley juice

Marvin, fending him off with a flyswatter: JACKIE THE CREATURE IS BACK