SAGAU - SAHSRAU IDEA

Sakumo being a super popular borderline sex symbol in his era will never stop being my favorite hc, I need to see more of it

All the people his age and younger had a crush on him. It was just a Thing(tm) where 9 times out of 10, a Konoha shinobi's first crush was probably Sakumo. Even other villages young shinobi hung up his bingo book picture above their bunk and dreamed of both killing him, being killed by him (in a hot way), having a battlefield fling with him, and more. There was blackmarket fanfiction. He was incredibly popular among civilians all over fire country. Some popular romance novels had love interests very blatantly based off him.

Even before they were on a team together, Obito and Rin both had a silly kid crush on Kakashi's dad (Obito more than Rin) and he was aware of it. This did not help make him like them any more. (By the time hearing smthn positive ab his dad would have made Kakashi softer, they'd both gotten better at hiding the crush, so to Kakashi it looked like they'd gotten over Sakumo.) Even Minato had a bit of a thing for him, not really but like— strong, popular, feard and very friendly ninja who is now paying him some attention (bc hes his kids teacher) he's not immune. Kushina understands, she is also not immune. (Kakashi is going to throw a fucking fit)

Even after his failed mission, when his reputation crashes and burns within the village, he still can't completely shake his admirers— they possibly just get more disrespectful ab the attraction when it mixes with the hate. (Which tbh could make for an interesting discussion all on its own)

Kakashi is haunted by his father's insane popularity for decades after his death. He does his very best to ignore the lingering evidence of people being insane ab his father.

One day he realizes one of his favorite romance novels has a romance interest based off Sakumo and has a break down ab it and can never read the series again.

When raiding an old abandoned enemy camp w Team Ro, he finds an old, autographed photo of his dad covered in lipstick marks in the communal bathroom. He chooses to ignore it but it's quickly spotted by his teammates, who do not know who Sakumk is, and v quickly begin to remark on the poster, who this mysterious Konoha nin is, and ahaha damn he is kinda good looking, huh? (Kakashi wants to DIE)

Shisui ends up taking the poster back to Konoha with them and hangs it up in the ANBU communal quarters where it is VERY quickly recognized. And also some of the people in that room recognize it so quick bc they also used to own a similar poster. (Kakashi wants to DIE someone PLEASE kill him now)

Its only when he's given team 7 that he finally thinks he's escaped the legacy of his father as Konoha's Most Sexiest Shinobi. Only for Naruto, when being trained by Jiriyah, to find his drafts for Icha Icha very clearly inspired by his dad. Which he can never publish for multiple reasons (lingering respect for Sakumo. Also for Kakashi, who is his biggest fan and would probably never look at him again.)

Naruto somehow accidentally brings this up with Kakashi who like. Has war flashbacks and immediatley stands up and walks away as Jiryah scrambles to try to explain himself and Tsunade looks on in scorn (she will approach him later to carefully ask for the drafts while trying to seem like she's not really asking for them bc she's too proud to admit it)

Naruto and Sakura discover Kakashi-sensei's dad was a sex symbol. I don't even know how they'd react but like. Oh my god. Oh my god you guys.

Funniest option would be they accidentally revive his popularity a little bit by being so loud ab it they like, remind people ab him. + introduce another generation to the idea of him

Kakashi is crouched on the floor with his face in his hands. When will he be freed from this hell.

Sasuke does not escape tho, he goes to sound and finds a picture of Sensei's dad in Orochimaru's office (???????)

This is such a shitty sketch but the vision:

Itachi, who learned who Sakumo was from that poster thing, goes on to find a photo of him in ""Madara's"" belongings and gets super weirded out but ultimately doesn't. Super care. But also. Like. What. What.

After Itachi finds the photo, which Obito genuinley forgot he fucking had and keeps in part just bc its like one of the only belongings that remained from his Konoha days, he shoves it somewhere in Kamui to forget about.

But then in the Obito vs Kakashi Kamui fight, it fucking flutters down in the middle of the fight and Obito fucking dies of humiliation as Kakashi realizes he will truly Never Escape and that this reality is his own personal hell

Uhh endgame Kakashi becomes Hokage and accidentally retreads his father's path in becoming the new Konoha Sexy Man. Which simultaneously crushes him (he will never escape) and fills him with delight (he will now be able to impart the pain of having your father figure be lusted after by all ur friends and acquaintances onto his students)

screwubbaboo

He broke through to the surface, taking large desperate gasps of air before getting sucked back beneath by the current. Danny fought against the water as hard as his little paws would allow.

Just when he felt all hope was lost and he was sinking, a large hand enveloped his entire body and hefted him back into the open air. Shivering and coughing out water he didn't catch whatever the man had said. He continued shivering violently as the guy wrung out Dannys fur.

The mans hands were warm despite the brown leather gloves covering them. They made Danny feel comforted and energized almost as if the man had...oh gods! He did! The man had ecto inside of him! Thank the ancients! Now he just had to stick with glove guy and he could recharge! It would be slow but still!

"Here we are little guy." The man said and Danny noticed all at once that the man had been walking the whole time Danny had been stuck in his head. He looked around and noticed the Animal Shelter sign in front of them.

No. No! Danny needed to stick to this guy if he ever hoped to become a human again. But despite how he dug his claws into the flesh of the mans exposed arm and yowled the man in the red mask managed to get him lose and left him in the care of an animal social worker.

Danny was checked out and placed in the tiny jail cell alongside other kittens and cats, many who were scared, miserable or just desperate for love and attention. This of course meant he needed to plot a jail break. Fortunately, he could still used most of his powers but without any ecto around he would have no way to recharge them outside of food or indulging in his obsession.

Needless to say Jason was a little startled when he woke up the next day to not one, but five little kittens meowing at him for food. He swears the one sitting smugly on his chest is the same one he dropped off at the animal shelter yesterday, but that couldn't be right...

One call confirmed it. All of thier animals had escaped last night and there was a suspiciously animal sized arch taken out of the wall with an unknown tool. Demon brat would be delighted at the news.

Unfortunately for Hood the smug little black cat he rescued yesterday had decided that his shoulder was the perfect perch and stayed there more often than not. Little guy got into food often but refused to eat kibble and any attempt to get the kitten away from the mashed potatoes resulted in violence or density shifting to get back to the food.

At this point danny almost didn't care if he returned to being human so long as he got to eat more of his humans cooking. He swears Jason is magical because everything he makes tastes amazing

Count the Shifts

TItle: Ripples on the Water Chapters: 2 / ?

Summary: In which Rin becomes a jinchuuriki, Obito gets hit with some hard facts (literally), and Isobu is absolutely done with all this bullshit.

FF | AO3 | Master Fic List

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Dont mess with our daughter

Wrath of the Fentons

Jason Todd had seen a lot of weird things in Gotham. Lazarus pits, immortal assassins, fear gas-induced nightmares—hell, he'd been one of the weird things, once upon a time. But watching a bunch of black-market meta traffickers haul a very pissed-off redhead into an unmarked van in broad daylight was quickly climbing the ranks of what the fuck moments.

She wasn't screaming. That was the first sign that something was wrong. Most metas—or normal people—would be terrified. Instead, this girl looked annoyed.

Jason had been tracking this particular ring for weeks. They specialized in kidnapping metas with "unique features"—horns, glowing eyes, animal traits, things that marked them as different. The bastards made a killing selling them off to the highest bidder.

The girl—Jazz, he caught one of the thugs saying—fit their usual type. Her hands, bound behind her, had faint green veins pulsing under her skin, as if something otherworldly coursed through her. Her eyes flickered a ghostly green before settling back into a sharp, human blue.

Jason knew that look. It was the look someone got when they were waiting.

For what? Backup? Did she have a tracker? A hidden weapon?

He was about to interfere when Jazz sighed dramatically and muttered, "You poor, poor idiots."

Jason didn't have time to wonder what she meant before his comms flared to life with a frantic Oracle.

"Red Hood, stand down—I repeat, do not engage—the girl's parents are en route, and—holy shit—these guys have no idea what they just did."

Jason frowned. "Parents? Who—"

And then he saw the tank.

It barreled down the street, mounted with weapons that absolutely should not be street legal, glowing green with ominous energy. The side of the vehicle had a logo painted in jagged white letters:

FENTON WORKS

The doors flew open, and a massive man in an orange jumpsuit leaped out, wielding what could only be described as an anti-aircraft cannon converted into a rifle. His wife followed, a visor covering her eyes, her sleek blue bodysuit glowing with strange symbols.

"JAZZ!" the man bellowed, aiming the cannon at the traffickers as if they were just another ghost to blast into oblivion.

"Hey, Dad!" Jazz called, still completely unbothered as one of the thugs tried to hold a knife to her throat. "You might want to be careful. They think I'm a meta."

"Oh, honey," her mom said, pulling out a gun that looked like it belonged in a sci-fi horror movie. "They won't be thinking anything in a few minutes."

Jason took a slow step back.

He'd seen Bruce handle hostage situations with surgical precision. He'd seen Dick talk down armed criminals with nothing but charm and a smile.

He had never seen two civilians go full scorched earth on a meta trafficking ring without so much as a plan beyond "rescue daughter, destroy everything."

The traffickers barely had time to react before green energy blasts tore through their van, their weapons, and the street around them. The sheer destructive enthusiasm was a sight to behold.

One thug made the mistake of aiming a gun at Maddie Fenton. She shot him with a glowing net that phased through his skin before electrifying him into unconsciousness. Another tried to run—Jack Fenton threw what looked like a modified bear trap, which snapped shut around the guy’s legs and dragged him back, screaming.

Jazz, still tied up, sighed as one guy tried to use her as a human shield. "You do realize that you're standing between me and them, right?"

The thug barely had time to consider his life choices before Maddie calmly shot him in the leg.

Jason, crouched on a nearby rooftop, slowly exhaled.

Well. The ring was definitely out of commission.

As the Fentons loaded the unconscious criminals into their highly illegal ghost-proof containment units, Jazz finally noticed Jason watching. She arched a brow.

"Hey, Red Hood, right?"

Jason, still processing, just nodded.

Jazz smirked. "You look like you're having a what the fuck moment."

Jason stared at the still-smoking wreckage of what used to be a human trafficking operation and then at the grinning, trigger-happy Fenton parents.

"Yeah," he said. "Yeah, that about sums it up."

Special edition Christmas fic where genin aged team 7 decide hatch their newest plot to see Kakashi's face: using mistletoe

Because if they trap him under it with someone, he'll surely have to take his mask off to give them a kiss! ...Right?

(Sasuke thinks this is fucking stupid)

The entire thing is just a fucking slapstick comedy as Kakashi goes "what's the funniest way I can go along with this." And decides he will in fact lower his mask and give a kiss to everyone the kids corner him with. But only when they look away / blink / their view is obstructed

The kids are chasing him around with a string on a stick w mistletoe tied to the end of it, and every time they miss seeing the kiss (and his face) hey scream even louder

Reactions range from "???!?????!?!??????" (Iruka) to straight up passing out (Gai) to laughing hysterically with a bright red face (Kurenai) to just sort of freezing up like a deer in headlights (Asuma)

Kakashi, having way too much fun, makes a shadow clone to pull the Sukea thing again. And the kids get "Sukea" on board, thinking he can take a photo the second Kakashi pulls his mask down for a smooch. Kakashi has WAY too much fun, essentially role-playing with himself and swooning dramatically. Then, at the end, Sukea goes, "Oh no the camera's memory card is gone, Kakashi must have stolen it :((" and the kids all scream in agony

They try to get him to describe Kakashi's face and Sukea gets all coy and goes "umm... its kind of... indescribable?"

(They get another person to try to snap a photo of him but they turn out to be a freezer so they don't take the picture. When the kids harass them ab it they just giggle a little maniacally ab his face)

This does escalate to doing this shit w enemy nin btw. Funniest option is obviously Tobi but I'm also raising u a really freaked the fuck out Itachi looking like an angry, surprised cat after Kakashi gives him a peck on the cheek (Sasuke is gonna fucking KILL HIMSELF)

Obito gets the full makeout session bc its funniest.

He shows up looking for a dramatic fight but like halfway through his villain speech, team 7 dangles the mistletoe over him, and he's so thrown off guard he just kinda "???? excuse me I'm kind of in the middle of—"

Kakashi, who is a) in too deep to stop the bit now, and b) recognizes a good way to throw off an enemy, fucking launches himself at him, pushes Tobi's mask up just enough to kiss, and starts to make out w him

His back is turned to the kids and they're all scrambling to try to catch a single glimpse, but he keeps his back to them as they scream and run around (thus prolonging the kiss)

Kakashi is totally checked out of the actual kiss, this is all fun and games to him. Obito is having a fucking religious experience wrapped in a manic episode flavored internal breakdown topped off with a very loud high pitched kettle noise that may or may not be confined to his brain

This lasts for like a solid minute before Kakashi releases him and readjust his mask, pats him on the shoulder and goes "sorry about that teehee"

Obito just kinda 🧍‍♀️ and they stare at eachother for another solid minute as team 7 screams and cries and throws up in the bg

Kakashi, seeing the opportunity to leave and avoid what was for sure going to be a potentially devistating fight: "cool. So, anyways. Bye lmao." And runs for it w his students

Obito is left tanding still as a statue in the middle of the clearing. After like 20 seconds alone he starts hyperventilating.

Merry Christmas everybody 👍

Self aware hsr characters that are an expy of HI3 characters

This might be ooc as I'm not 100% familiar with HI3 and HSR characters entirely also mentions of Bronya x Seele and Raiden Mei x Kiana of sorts

Self aware! Welt who has felt your presence before in his world, so the captain has decided to board on a train instead of a ship this time round and he gladly welcomes you and your presence even if you don't know that he knows you're out there

Self aware! Himeko who is not entirely sure why your presence felt so familiar and what do you mean you'll protect her at all cost so she doesn't die in this universe? It's touching but she doesn't get it.

Self aware! Luocha whos wondering who is this Otto Apocalypse or Void Archives that you keep mentioning who's similar to him. He's just a merchant doing business, he has no ill intent and why does Welt keep avoiding him and why do you agree with Welt actions from sending him that book? He 100% does not carry any malicious intent and is hurt by your actions (or is he? /J)

Self aware! Acheron who finds your presence familiar and soothing as if this emanator has met you before in a past life or another universe, even after all her suffering she just can't bring herself to hate you even if that means she's lost her Kiana

Self aware! Bronya who mentions to her mother that she finds this odd presence yet you don't feel malicious. Even her mother says you feel familiar of sorts, and why does she hear you being so excited upon seeing her? And why do you keep squealing whenever she's with Seele? What do you mean you ship them together?

Self aware! Seele who finds it irritating that there's this sudden presence that seems to follow the Trailblazer and the Astral Express and yet you feel familiar despite not knowing you. She slowly grows fond of your presence and starts getting used to you overtime. She still questions why you keep squealing whenever Bronya and her are together, what's a ship?

Self aware! Silverwolf who first felt your presence in Hertas Space station but doesn't mention anything because well she knows that you know her 'counterpart' from another game aka Haxxor Bunny and she doesn't blame you that it's fun to feel familiarity that she receives just because of her counterpart

Self aware! Sushang who doesn't really notice your presence till the blonde merchant, Luocha brings it up and she enjoys your presence and even though it's weird that you feel so familiar to her yet not to the general or her best friend Guinaifen

Self aware! Yanqing who's first instinct is to bring it up to the general who chuckles and think it must be his imaginative friend or something which does piss YangQing off but he can't be mad at either you or the general as first of all you didn't feel threatening and second of all you didn't even know he exists but he's a little on edge and takes time for him to get used to your presence

Ooh, your fic for Sahsrau was super fun to read!!! And honwstly its cooking ideas in my brain about saghsr!!

But quick question: How do you think does it feels for the characters to be guided by us? Do you think they get tired from running across maps, or do they just somehow have infinite stamina without being tired as we, the player, do? (I'd feel super guilty if it wasn't the case and they just suffered from crippling exhaustion but prompted to push on despite it ( ´△｀))

Thank you for the kind words!! I actually had to think about this for a while...

Hmm.... well, in my au, their newfound devotion to the Aeon of Unity basically makes them sort of forget that they have to rest, but no worries, their Aeon always lets them rest and recover from all the running and fighting. Such a merciful being indeed, though some of them find unity in the suffering, all for their Aeon, i suppose.

As for how they feel.... groups like the Astral Express and the Knights of Beauty are quite welcoming of the Aeon, mostly due to their lack of one. Some of the knights even wax poetic about how the Aeon was fated to bless and protect them after their Aeons passing. While the Loufu, and the people of Jarillo-VI think of them as a helpful and supportive god. The Genius society is still trying to figure out what this new Aeon is.

The stellaron hunters, though.... let's just say they are the most devoted ones. Elio, especially as destiny's slave and seeing the future the new Aeon will lead them to.

Amity Park got turned into an island in a fantasy universe (Fantasy AU)

When Amity Park left the Infinite Realms it didn’t reappear where it had been before, instead it seemed to land in the ocean. Water all around them, a landmass barely on the horizon. Phantom flew to take a look and when he came back told the people of Amity Park that they were not in their universe. He had seen dragons and other creatures that definitely didn’t exist on earth.

Amity Park was now an island. Sandy beaches surrounded the once land-locked city and a row of problems arose faster than solutions could be found. They had food in the supermarkets, the mall and some smaller stores, but the fridges and freezers needed electricity. It took the Fentons and a few electricians to find a solution. 

That was the start of the Fenton Ecto Battery, while the Fentons themselves had already used ecto to power their inventions they now had to find a way to build a battery big enough to power the whole city and then somehow find a way to connect it to the existing lines under the city. 

There was also the problem of money, while people had money, the bank itself didn’t store all of the money in cash. There was no internet or phone service, they were transported into a time before in their minds. 

“Well, the portal still works, can’t we just go back?” 

Phantom had to explain that he couldn’t transport the whole city, he was already busy using his ice until they had power again. Not to mention that the whole city now knew that Phantom was Fenton. And Danny also helped with the F.E.B.

Tucker and Technus were the ones who took on the problem, they had already been working on multiverse phones, so Tucker and Sam could reach Danny no matter where he was, in the Realms or not. 

People who had worked outside of Amity Park were forced to find new work inside the city, retirees came back to work to help as well with knowledge how to do jobs without the modern comforts. 

They were lucky an old man had retired and moved to live with his daughter after a lifetime of building ships. Thanks to him the Amity Parkers actually had a chance at fresh food. Phantom was eventually send out to look for cows, chickens, whatever he would find that could be taken care of for food later on.

The first year was plagued by problems the people had to slowly work out, as well as the struggle of the entire town being heavily liminal due to their three-day-exposure in the Realms. Getting used to people floating suddenly, or phasing into the ground from one step to the next as well as suddenly being a lot stronger and faster were a lot.

The second year slowly worked better, people were used to their new abilities, their new way of life, the ghosts that had attacked them before were now helping them out. Ghostwriter had taken over a big chunk of teaching after he found books about the world’s history and different cultures. 

It wasn’t until their fifth year, now rather used to this life, that they saw a ship coming their way for the first time. The ship carried with it a diplomatic party. In the years Danny had flown over to the continent again and again, learning about animals, seeing the land that was nearest to theirs and thus had been chosen to talk to the newcomers. 

When the diplomatic party had been led through the town they were in awe as well as scared. These people lived not far from the most dangerous forest and yet they had incredible technology. Carriages with now animals to draw them, silently rolling or some even flying through the streets. Streets made from one big stone it seemed while living in equally big stone houses. It was this expedition's quest to visit the land behind the forest. They couldn’t go through the forest, so they had taken a ship, only to be surprised that an island was on the horizon.

It was risky to change their route to the island instead of around the forest, but it would be best. Either they found new lands, or they found new people to trade with. The king was in a desperate situation while trying to build up a poor kingdom he inherited from his father who had run the country into the ground. 

The island was big, and on it was a city bigger and taller than anything they had ever seen, the people living on it were not humans, they had glowing eyes, fangs, long ears. Identifiers from elves and demons, yet they didn’t own the same coloring of the demons or the lithe statue of the elves. 

Nothing about this city had prepared them for the person they met to talk to. The people living here could talk in their language in a broken and heavily accented way, but it was made clear that whoever they were to meet was important. So they stared at the big house and strange contraption on top of it, pressing a button and a sound came from inside the house. The door was opened by a tall woman, she invited them in, inside was more colorful than they had ever seen aside from palaces. 

The house was not big enough for a palace, yet the inside would not lose out in it’s fancy design new to them. The woman told them to wait as she got someone to talk to them, when she reentered the room she was followed by a man even taller than her. Long dark hair braided back, even in the dirty clothes he was wearing and with dirt smeared on him he gave an imposing aura.

“Ah, hello.” Of the group of outsiders a man at the front took a step forward and bowed before answering.

“Greetings, we are the delegation of the kingdom of Root. In the name of his majesty king Jovic the first of his name we would like to open trade with your kingdom.” Danny scratched his cheek, making eye contact with Jazz for a moment. She nodded.

“Welcome to Amity Park then, we aren’t really a kin-” Jazz smiled as she stepped on his foot.

“I mean… I’m Phantom, High King of the Infinite Realms.” 

“I’m Jasmine, his sister.” She turned towards what the group now knew as this island’s king and started to talk to him in another language they had heard spoken by the people of the island. They seemed to discuss something before Jasmine took out a small device and proceeded to tap her finger on it, before putting it away.

“You must be tired from the long journey, please follow the guard to your resting quarters. We will talk again tomorrow.” They were led out by the same people who had taken them to their king. When they entered the even taller building they were led to and brought up to a floor filled with doors and given keys with strange symbols on them they were confused.

“The number on the key belongs to the number on the door.” A young woman said and showed them that the key would only work on the door with the same numbers on them. “Someone will come and bring you food, they will knock on the door. Rest for today, tomorrow Phantom will send somebody to lead you to the town hall for talks.” 

The food they were served later in the day was incredible, spices were used freely as well as meat and a meat-free option. The rooms themselves were fit for a palace and came each with their own bathroom. There was flowing water coming from a pipe above a basin and the tub! Each room had it! They talked together until late in the night, they would need to ask for the technology tomorrow.

DCXDP Masterpost

I've been requested to make a masterpost, and I see now that I need it, as I've written quite a lot.

Separated into 2 categories stories and one-shots.

I'll mark the monsterfucker categories in pink.

Stories:

Speedrunning Romance 1

Dumpster Baby 1, 2, 3

One-shots:

DEMON TWINS, BUT DANYAL NEVER REVIVED

Fashion Summon Ratatouille

Greatest Treasure

Contingencies

Idk if this counts but: Massage Therapist Danny

Hotdog Hunter

Jason's a 10 while his boyfriend looks mid

The Thrift Shop