I May Be Butch Sometimes But I ALWAYS Love The Color Pink. I Will Be A Butch In A Completely Fem House.

my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old

Damn…just…damn, man. RIP to Polly Lou Livingston, who provided the voice of everyone’s favorite apple pie making elephant as Tree Trunks, according to one of the crew who worked on Adventure Time, Adam Muto. She’ll be missed.

I have to try this:

john mulaney talking about how much he loves his wife and roasting other male comedians that just talk shit on their wives is why The Gays like him so much because he’s what Straight Culture should be

IS HERE 

oh to be a statue of a goddess covered in moss, somewhere in the garden of the enchanted ruins the castle left behind, for birds to take rest on my shoulders and for animals to sleep in front of my feet, for no ordinary humans to be reached

If i had deer horns and pointy ears then maybe everything would be ok

so what if im in love with you mind ur own business

this is so damn funny lmaooo