29 | asexual aromantic agender | she/they/its sie/dey/es I like Bob's Burgers, knitting, sewing and reading
286 posts
Latest Posts by gap-tooth - Page 6
why does oscar wilde take 150 pages to write something he could literally say in a paragraph
"Not everything is about your autism."
Actually it is. My autism effects:
How I see the world, including light sensitivity
How I interact with the world, including difficulties with social interaction, speech difficulties and processing disorders
How I feel the world around me, including hyposensitivity or hypersensitivity to temperature, pain, or stimuli as well as proprioception which can make it difficult for me to physically navigate the world
How I feel my body, including interoception which can lead to missed meals, dehydration, and even urinary urgency (which is a problem just by itself) because I don't notice the signals my body gives
How I relate to those around me, due to my alexithymia, so often I feel nothing or can not work through the bodily sensations that indicate emotions.
How I cope with the world, including needing to stim, escape noises others may not hear, or requiring accommodations to help me survive an "average" day
How I rest after a normal day, including delayed sleep onset, reduced melatonin and increased cortisol, making getting to sleep a 2 hour long endeavour and staying asleep a task unto itself
So yes.
This is all about my autism.
"Mozart was autistic because he was a child prodigy who wrote whole pieces in a day" no Mozart was autistic because he used echolalia and always spoke the truth even though it got him violently ejected from his workplace and had no interest in marriage and had a childish personality and sense of humor and was routine-oriented and had a low frustration tolerance. the prodigy thing has almost nothing to do with it. I would like to see one scholar within my lifetime consider the posthumous diagnosis for ANY reason other than "little boy played music well." I take personal offense to the fact that despite his utter genius he's been considered immature by academics because of his mannerisms. where have I heard THAT one before?
the autistic charlie kelly (sorta) masterpost:
trouble controlling the pitch of his voice, yells a lot but doesnāt always intend to
good at setting routines for himself, and following them, even though other people view them as strange or bad
his mail system w/ burn/send to himself/deliver
the cat food/beer/glue system when dee spends the night
trouble interacting with people outside of the gang
auditory processing issues
may account for some of his trouble reading and writing
can lead to problems following directions or like distinguishing between similar sounding words/sounds
it can also be like hearing what someone says but not understanding any of it
has a restricted diet bc of sensory issues
hasnāt eaten a lot of fruits (not necessarily bc sensory issues)
tries a pear and has an immediate sensory reaction (i.e. saying it tastes like sand, because even if it wasnāt ripe most people wouldnāt have that adverse of a reaction to it)
eats foods that he knows are good sensory-wise frequently (i.e. cheese)
also creates foods that are pleasing sensory-wise (milksteak)
also likes dark places bc sensory issues
sewers n stuff like that
stims by shaking his legs, tapping his feet, tapping on things with his hands
stims when happy vocally (shouting things) and by clapping
stims when angry/upset by shouting, pulling at his hair, and sorta cupping his hands over his ears, touching his face
bad at regulating his facial expressions (maybe)
āthe gang solves the gas crisisā
talks with his hands all the timeĀ
sometimes to try to get across what he means when he has trouble communicating it verbally
special interest in musical stuff, writing songs/music
gets really stressed out about major change
leaving philly for the first time
frank moving in w/ his mother
doesnāt own many shirts, maybe bc sensory issues?? idk
misinterprets what other people are saying (maybe auditory processing stuff)
āthe gang gets analyzedā
echolalia
repeats what people say a lot (alsoĀ āthe gang gets analyzedā)
also communicates in movie references or tries to communicate how he feels using movie characters
uhh thatās all i can think of right now!! feel free to reblog n add stuff yāknow! iām always happy to see other pplās headcanons etc. :D
charlie is so autistic coded it isnāt even funny. obscure special interests. doesnāt understand social cues or norms. you can never tell if heās joking or serious. just āgetsā music to the point heās a genius with it. has to have his own psychological trauma explained to him so he can realize itās trauma. same outfit 4/7 days of the week. safe foods are weird and also all he wants to eat. big feelings that he canāt process without a meltdown. vocal and physical stims. pattern recognition. doesnāt like physical affection. has meltdowns when overstimulated. loves routine and gets upset when his schedule is changed. itās all autism babey.
I am asexual, aromantic, and agender. I have made precisely one decision in my life, and that decision was "no".
As a kid, I wasn't taught any concept that there's a difference between wanting to do something, and enjoying it. I was a largely unsupervised kid with undiagnosed ADHD and parents who expected their kids to just raise themselves on their own. So when I was capable of spending hours drawing or reading a fun book, but couldn't even remember that I had homework, ever, I was told that I simply didn't want to do well in school. And who was I to question that, I'm eight years old.
Enjoyment and passion were the only forms of motivation I knew, and if I couldn't make myself either love doing boring math homework as much as I loved my hobbies, or force myself to push through things I hated with sheer willpower alone because I want to succeed so bad, then clearly I was simply not as good as all the other kids, who could do that. And that attitude carried onto adulthood. Every time I struggled to muster genuine love and passion into something, I thought that I just don't want it badly enough. Not to enough to love it, or to suffer through it.
Being medicated for the first time was a game changer. Like holy shit, so this is your brain on dopamine. And suddenly I wanted to do things, turned my life around, took up the passion career I had never dared to try. And when the first "honeymoon phase" of the meds wore down, the same fear came back - I don't like this anymore, do I not want it bad enough? What else could I possibly want?
And I shit you not I was literally 30 years old when I understood that life isn't just either loving every minute of pursuing a passion that you love, or joylessly dragging yourself through things that you don't even want to do. I can just tell myself "just because I don't like doing this doesn't mean I don't want to be doing it." It's not a mark of failure, weakness or lack of motivation, if sometimes the career you want to be doing just feels like having a job.
"You're making autism your whole personality but you shouldn't, you're not your autism !"
Listen. When I was diagnosed I found out EVERYTHING I thought was my "personality" were actually autistic traits and it messed me up so bad because I didn't know who I was anymore. Literally EVERY. SINGLE. Thing I ever did or thought was actually autism. Then I realized hey, if all of my personality is "just autism", that means all of neurotypicals' personalities are also "just neurotypicality". Actually I can even observe it now that I know all of the traits and it's very obvious ! But neurotypicals are considered the norm, so they don't have to analyze it so they don't know.
My autism is my whole personality the same way your neurotypicality is your whole personality, you just never had to acknowledge it unlike me
god keeps trying to bring forth the second coming of christ through a virginal birth but the species is random every time and so far it's just been 259,687 different beetles and eighteen types of waterfowl
as an autistic person, can i just say that Charles Babbage aka āfather of the computerā was totally one of us and also his vendetta against street music & organ grinders was VALID
I feel like we donāt talk about Bobās hyperfixation on Cake enough lol. Literally so relatable
Things that make me (autistic and goth) a vampire:
Sun? No, thank you. Instant kill.
Counting everything. Please don't throw rice at me.
Invite me directly. "You're always invited". No, I have to stand at your door and you have to say "Come in", else I can't physically enter.
Did someone eat garlic like 5 days ago? I can tell.
You don't want to be informed for three hours about the different sounds bats make?
Black cloths. Everything else is too overstimulating.
Very formal and rigid way of speaking and behaving, almost like a dark lord in 1894.
"I've recently started this hobby... wait, this was a decade ago?"
āIf autism isnāt caused by environmental factors and is natural why didnāt we ever see it in the past?ā
We did, except it wasnāt called autism it was called āLittle Jonathan is a r*tarded halfwit who bangs his head on things and canāt speak so weāre taking him into the middle of the cold dark forest and leaving him there to die.ā
Things that make me (autistic and goth) a vampire:
Sun? No, thank you. Instant kill.
Counting everything. Please don't throw rice at me.
Invite me directly. "You're always invited". No, I have to stand at your door and you have to say "Come in", else I can't physically enter.
Did someone eat garlic like 5 days ago? I can tell.
You don't want to be informed for three hours about the different sounds bats make?
Black cloths. Everything else is too overstimulating.
Very formal and rigid way of speaking and behaving, almost like a dark lord in 1894.
"I've recently started this hobby... wait, this was a decade ago?"
This variant of the Goldentail / Bastard Moray is known as the Banana Eel due to its colouration and markings resembling a ripe banana.
(source)
I typed āno this is Patrickā and I got in
This made me so happy. Never give up and follow your dreams.