Studying Doesn’t Have To Be Highlighters And A Warm Cup Of Coffee With Sunlight Shining Through The

Dear 2017,

I saw you described as a scooter to the ankle and I don’t think I’ve ever agreed with something more. You had your good moments, can’t deny that. I became an adult this year, how did that happen? I have cried more this year than I ever have. I have had a year filled with good and bad, of meetings and partings. I made friends this year I thought would be with me forever, people I thought would have my back, alas I lost them this year too, because they weren’t who I thought they were.

This year I saw people for what they were. 2017, you show me that seven years of friendship, years of me putting others first, of making sure everyone else was okay when I was hurting, boils down to nothing. Not when there are others who can manipulate and twist things. Not when others are louder. Not when your own voice has been reduced to nothing. Maybe I expected to much. Maybe I thought my friends knew me better than they did. Maybe I thought after everything they’d have my back. I wanted my friends to stick up for me and they didn’t. I’ve accepted that.

2017, you pushed me to my limit. You sent me trials that made me question everything I’ve done for the last 5 years. But you showed me that I am stronger than I thought. That I can cope with a lot more than I expected. You taught me that I will be fine. You showed me that even in my lowest moments I can keep going. You reminded me of the importance of family and helped me see who my real friends are.

2017, this year I took a leap and started writing my own novel. The characters that have been a comfort to me for longer than I can remember finally found a home. I found the confidence to start and starting is the hardest part. I doubted myself. I had lost all confidence in my own abilities. But I pushed myself. I started. And not only that but this year I decided what I wanted to do as a career. I was never going to be a doctor or a lawyer or teacher, I think everyone realised that in the end. But although I love acting I realised this year that my heart lies in my writing. When it makes me happy, when it’s all I think about, when all I can do is create stories morning till night I can’t see how I could do anything else. Writing has been the one true thing I have stuck with and it has given my over active imagination a playground.

2017, you were the year that made me realise I put others before myself too often, to a point where I was making myself ill. I will still always be there for the people I care about but now I understand that I need to look after myself too. Life is too short to spend it making myself miserable to make others happy. 2017, you taught me that everything will be okay, to have faith in myself and do what makes me happy. I start 2018 a different person, without the people I thought would never leave. But that’s okay. I don’t mind anymore. I can forgive you all that, 2017, I needed to know.

I start 2018 in a more positive position. I know it’s going to be difficult - that my A Levels are going to be stressful but it doesn’t last forever. ‘This too shall pass’ isn’t that the saying? And the Beth who starts 2019 will thank me for what I do in 2018. Who knows, she may even be proud.

I’m finally learning to take care of myself. 2017, you pushed me to get help for my anxiety, something I always said I didn’t need. I was wrong and you were right. I needed help. I couldn’t go on the way I was. I was in a downward spiral, 2017, and my mental health was worse than it ever had been. I thought I was going mad. I’ve got help though and people are aware now of how much I was suffering and how much I still suffer.

I am done changing myself to fit other people’s preferred view of me. I’ve only got one life and I am determined to live it as myself. Not someone else. I wrote once that ‘we all become stories’ and that we should ‘embrace the uniqueness of our own’ because ‘no one will ever have the same story as you’. Typical writer, I suppose. But whatever my story is, it will not be dictated by others. Thank you, 2017, for helping me see how much needed to change.

Goodbye, 2017, you’ve taught me a lot but I cannot say I am sad to see you go. Here’s to better days.

Beth

31/12/17

Physics time!

I was gonna do my laundry but when I turned the corner and saw this on the ground I stopped what I was doing and decided to make a snapchat story of science (I’m @thescalex on snapchat, if you want my username)

*cue Charlie Brown soundtrack of kids cheering*

There’s your science for the day. Go try it out for yourself!

*UPDATED* in the final picture of the original post, I made the mistake of saying “light as a particle” - I should have repeated the initial description (which is now fixed): the effect is from light passing through a single slit and diffracting, which is more accurate to what is being observed, because each bulb is a “point-source of light.” While the general scientific consensus is that light does indeed have particle properties, this single slit experiment is not a true depictor of those properties. While fewer photons do indeed get through, diffraction still (faintly) occurs between the lines. It’s the double slit experiment where things get REALLY weird, though.

@ everyone who went through a period of having no friends, who ate alone, who had a point in their life where they were too embarrassed to tell their parents they had no one to play with after school: I love you. I know it hurts and I know it’s hard but it’s not your fault. Things will grow and change. You will find people who you click with and they will love you too. You deserve positive friendship relationships just like anyone else. And if you’re still going through this phase, you’re strong, and things will change for you too. You are not alone, there are people experiencing the same thing you are, find them, you deserve positivity and companionship. Keep your head up.

[02.01.2018] day 87 –

my brain, currently: chemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistrychemistry

also, I received an offer from the university of amsterdam today and I’m so happy!

senioritis? after only two months of school? it’s more likely than you think

Alyssa Alhadeff

Scott Beigel

Martin Duque

Nicholas Dworet

Aaron Feis

Jamie Guttenberg

Chris Brent Hixon

Luke Hoyer

Cara Loughran

Gina Montalto

Joaquin Oliver

Alaina Petty

Meadow Pollack

Helena Ramsey

Alex Schachter

Carmen Marie Schentrup

Peter Wang

I’m so sorry. 💔

Thanks for making this awesome activity @yuu-chii I crossed out lots more than I thought I would and I had such a hard time deciding if I prefer tea or coffee. I'm a sophomore (10th) in America and I'm very active in theatre and music at my school. I'm also a huge nerd who loves math and science. Thanks for this fun bingo game :)

5.10.16 // the weather outside wasn’t too great today, so I decided to camp out and study in my dorm room today.

Finally got around to making my January spread It's not much but I like how it turned out

Hey guys, I’m participating to the 100 Days of Productivity Challenge by @emmastudies Here is the highlight of the first 5 days, it’s going pretty well so far! This challenge really helps me getting motivated!

I’m posting daily on my studygram so feel free to join the fun🎓💪🏻 ig: thomstudies