Ok So I Have An Idea For A Character And This One Has Been In My Head For A Bit.

No. You need to do your calc work for class.

Our horror movie night goes with the second movie being cat in the hat and someone yelling “YOU WILL NOT SIMP FOR LIVE ACTION CAT IN THE HAT!” And someone asking if they can drink my gain laundry detergent. My response was becoming the mom friend and shouting “NNOOOOOO!!!”

Renee: Hey Dick, my favorite older brother who I love very much and-

Dick: You’re calling me at three am. What do you want?

Renee: Actually I need you to bail me out of GCPD.

Dick: sure

Dick:

Dick: WAIT! WHAT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN GCPD! OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED! *incoherant screaming*

Renee: *click*

Tim: Told you he would be like that.

*turning to officer*

Renee: Can I call someone else to bail me out?

Later

Renee: You’re here!

Dick: why are you in a holding cell in GCPD?

Renee: ask the idiot in the next cell over *glares harshly at random guy*

Random guy: Don’t piss her off. She’s fucking terrifying.

Tim: You don’t know the half of it. We LIVE with her.

Nerf Gun Fight (Batboys)

Request: Can you do headcanons for what it’d be like to have a nerf gun war with the boys in the mansion? Who breaks things unnecessarily, who uses someone as a human shield, does dick pretend to die dramatically when he gets shot?

A/N: Not really motivated to write much recently but this was fun!! I am HELLA tired now and this turned into a NERF WAR rather than a single fight but hey, ya can’t complain, right? :D

Tagged: @jason-todd-rh @boosyboo9206 @pooiooi @icequeen206 @sassyshoulderangel319 @crescent-bluemoon @nanna-the-batmum @xoleaox @sleep-depiravation @jaybirdxarsenal @youthbitch @illeatyoursoulwithmustard

[You wanna be tagged in my next piece? Just shoot me a message or ask!]

Dick Grayson

The one who sees this merely as fun

Bonding Time!!

Expect to be shot from a grown ass man that hangs upside down from a chandelier in a dramatic-ass James bond pose because he WILL

Broke the chandelier bc Dick, you’re not 8 ANYMORE

Made a backstory for his ‘character’ because that’s what this whole thing is missing – extra drama

Faked an accent during the whole thing and is so inconsistent with it that it drove the others NUTS

If his s/o (you) is playing along then he will protect you like you’re some kind of royalty and he’s your devoted knight

Shot you once in the butt when you didn’t look and ran away after that like the cowards he is bc he knew your wrath was now upon him

It became some kind of butt-target-practice between the two of you

Hides in high and impossible places BECAUSE HE CAN

Died dramatically when you finally shot him point blank range

Shrieked, fell to his knees, laying on the ground coughing and gave a dramatic speech with coughs and all the pizzazz

Honestly, the whole thing lasted so long you shot him again bc „Please get it over with, Dick“ „Only if you kiss me.“

Rinse and repeat for EVERY SINGLE TIME HE GOT SHOT

Tim stopped shooting him just so he wouldn’t have to hear him shriek in horror ever again

Jason Todd

The one who goes out to the MAX

Shoots everyone in the face bc he’s obnoxious like that

„JASON! We said no headshots!“ you yell and he shoots you in the face

Got a second gun from SOMEWHERE because he needed to keep his aesthetic ™

Threw his gun at Damian at one point (when he ran out of ammo) and gave him a bloody nose

Somehow ended up with a black eye (see above)

Listen, s/o or not, he will shoot you. Don’t cross him

If you even attempt to shoot him back he will throw his jacket over your head and take you hostage

„If you want to see her alive-„ „Jason… She’s your girlfriend… and she is on your team“ „Don’t fucking interrupt me, Dickhead!“

Ís a hypocrite bc HE can shoot you but if anyone dares to shoot you or just aims at you, they get punched

Whenever he gets shot he refuses to die properly. He just sits down and mumbles something under his breath like “this shit again”

„You have to lay down, that’s the rule.“ „DON’T TELL ME HOW TO DIE BECAUSE I KNOW!“

Once accidentally hit you in the eye and everybody stopped in their tracks and pointed their guns at him (once they made sure you were fine)

He died in a hail of nerf-bullets (or darts) while you gave him the finger

Tim Drake

The only one who has a freaking plan

Put traps around the whole mansion like he had this war planned for months

He was prepared™

Doesn’t run out of ammo bc he plans his shots and doesn’t just randomly shootaround (see Dick)

Mainly hides and keeps out of this big feud between Jason and Dick and concentrates more on surviving Damian

Recorded video evidence of Everyone breaking things for future blackmailing (bc you can never have enough material)

Also, the only one who actually teamed up with his s/o bc he’s not stupid? Like, make allies not enemies??

Gives you his nerf-gun occasionally so you can go nuts with two guns and have fun while he prepares his next trap

Only attacks his brothers to make them think it was someone else (for example: threw a shuriken at Jason, making him think it was Damian) and watches the chaos turn into mayhem from the shadows with you

Gives out the most unenthusiastic deaths of them all.

Like he just sighs and lays down face first for the duration of his ‚Death‘ bc this is stupid.

TIMMY PLEASE

Once was lying so long Dick got worried and came out of hiding to see if he was okay

Tim got up, shot him and walked away

Dick was so shocked

Jason laughed so loud at this he blew his cover and Damian found him

Damian Wayne

The one that takes the thing too seriously.

Of course, ALL of them are hella competitive but this boy won’t go down without drawing blood

Turn this fight into a freaking WAR

Kicked Tim out of his hiding spot and into open fire as a distraction to sneak up on Dick

Got shoved (or rather kicked) down the stairs by Tim after that

REVENGE

Used real ass smoke-bombs like What the fuck Damian?!

First one that introduced real weapons into the war

Somehow lodged a BOOK into the wall and nobody knows how, when and why??

The most pissed out of ALL of them when he ‚dies‘

Swears bitter REVENGE and explains to the offending party in detail how he will kill them in return and then actually pulls through with it bc an eye for an eye

It still doesn’t stop Jason from shooting Damian in the face whenever his guard is down tho

Escalated SO MUCH he had to be put in time-out

Meaning: Jason stuffed him into a cupboard and locked it

Damian dislocated Jason’s shoulder for that one

Also, there is now a shredded cupboard door that needs to be explained to Alfred and Bruce (but mainly Alfred)

Breaks the most stuff bc ITS FOR A GREATER CAUSE

Needs to chill

You have to remind him that this is a game at least twice every minute bc he is not very familiar with that concept

“Damian…. Don’t you think this is going too far?” you say when he pulled out something that looked like a grenade

“Tt, don’t be stupid. There is no such thing as going too far.”

Is the reason nerf-guns are banned in the manor

Bruce walked in on a demolished manor and nerf darts all around in the weirdest and most obvious places and when he asked what happened Damian of course tattled

Still thinks he won the war

Our horror movie night goes with the second movie being cat in the hat and someone yelling “YOU WILL NOT SIMP FOR LIVE ACTION CAT IN THE HAT!” And someone asking if they can drink my gain laundry detergent. My response was becoming the mom friend and shouting “NNOOOOOO!!!”

Justice League Meeting

Superman: where's Batman? The meeting was supposed to start 20 minutes ago.

Wonderwoman: could he be in danger?

Green Arrow: someone maybe should call him BEFORE we go into defcon 1

Superman: [calls the bat-line]

Oracle: [answers] this is O. How can I help?

Superman: Hi Oracle. Batman was supposed to be at the tower 20 minutes ago. Do you know where he is?

Oracle: let me check... yeah, he's at the cave, I can connect you to the security cameras?

Superman: Please.

Oracle: ok.

-The batcave shows up on screen, Bruce and some of the kids present-

Batman: [Mid sentence] -OUTRAGEOUS STUNT!!

Damian: [scowling, arms crossed] -tt-

Batman: Do NOT scoff at me, young man!

Jason: [snorts]

Batman: Are you Laughing?! This is reckless even by YOUR standards Jason!

Jason: yeah... but you said-

Batman: [menacing] What?!

Jason: [looks at Dick and mimes "young man"]

Batman: Don't look at-

Dick: [loudly and jovially] THERE'S NO NEED TO FEEL DOWN

Batman: Wh-

Steph: I said YOUNG MAN [spins to point at Tim]

Tim: [Fingerguns at Steph] Pick yourself off the ground!

Batman: [floundering] En-

Dick: I said YOUNG MAN

Jason: 'Cause you're in a new town!

Duke: [from the locker rooms] There's no need to be unhappy!

Batman: [to Duke] You're not even in trouble!

Steph and Tim: YOUNG MAN there's a place you can go!

Dick: [throws an arm around Jason's shoulders] I said YOUNG MAN! When you're short on your dough!

Jason: You can STAY THERE!

Batman: That's EN-

Dick and Jason: [turn to Damian, grinning expectantly] and I'm sure you will find-!!

Damian: [glaring and without enthusiasm] ...many ways to have a good time.

Batman: Don't-

All the batkids: [chorusing] It's fun to stay at the B-A-T CAVE

Batman: [finally loses it] WHY???!!

-

Superman: ...

Green Arrow: ...well someone has to say it.

The Flash: That he should get an award for parenting that lot?

Green Arrow: that clearly inherited behaviour has nothing to do with genetics. I grew up with Bruce Wayne; he deserves every second of this

Stephanie: Yoink is the opposite of yeet.

Jason: But it’s just as fast.

Tim: The lord yeetith and he yoinketh away.

Bruce: I think I’m having a stroke.

Young Justice Season 2 characters + Troubled Birds

OwO

I know who you are and I’m coming for your kneecaps.

There are Monsters in the Dark

[Bruce waking up to Jason looming over him]

Bruce, bleary eyed: Jason? Why- why are you watching me sleep?

Jason: I need your help.

Bruce, groaning: What did you do?

Jason: Excuse you, I did nothing but be my perfect angel self.

Bruce, deadpan: Ah yes, angel and Jason. Two words that are basically synonymous. Well then, my angel child, I'm sure this can wait till tomorrow after I have had at least 3 hours of sleep.

Jason: It actually can't, because there is currently a monster residing under my bed.

Bruce:

Bruce, blinking slowly: Jason, you are 22. There isn't a monster under your bed.

Jason: Oh, silly me, let me just inform the MONSTER under MY BED that there is apparently an age limit on that sort of behavior.

Bruce: You can't be serious, Jay.

Jason: Deadly. Much like the monster under my bed. And as my dad it is your job to get rid of it.

Bruce: *Getting up and angrily putting his robe on* Alfred help you, Jason, if you woke me up at 4 am to kill a spider.

Jason: Firstly, it's not a spider, Bruce. And secondly, there is no need to invoke the name of our lord and savior, Alfred Pennyworth.

Bruce: *rolling his eyes*

[Bruce getting on his knees to check under the bed]

Bruce: See, there's no- F*CK! *Bruce slamming his head against the bed-frame upon seeing Tim dressed as the Joker under the bed*

Jason, laughing hysterically: Oh my god, I should have filmed that.

Bruce, wide-eyed looking at Jason: What is wrong with you?

Jason: So, so many things. But this right here, was genius.

Bruce: Tim! Get out from under the bed, now!

Tim: *Crawling out from under the bed* Sorry, Bruce. But that was pretty funny.

Bruce: No! It wasn't! That is the most horrifying sh*t you two have ever pulled!

Tim: What about that time in-

Bruce: And yes. I am including the incident in Shanghai.

*Tim and Jason grinning and high-fiving*

Bruce: No! No high-fiving! This is not a high-fiving moment! I could have seriously injured, Tim.

Tim, snorting: When? After or before you screamed and hit your head against the bed?

Bruce: *Unimpressed bat-glare*

Bruce: I'm returning you both.

Jason: Sorry, there's a no return policy on broken orphans.

Tim: *snorting and high-fiving Jason again*

Bruce: Stop high-fiving! This is serious!

Jason: Yeah, yeah, Old Man. Save the lecture. We're on a time crunch, we still have to dress Timbers up as Ra's and hide him in the Demon Brats closet.

Bruce:

Bruce: Why are you two like this?

Jason, shrugging: Blame it on the childhood trauma.

[Tim and Jason walking out of the room]

Bruce: Alcohol. I need Alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol.

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