Explosivetelepathy

if it was GUARANTEED that u would survive would u rather

A. explore a black hole

B. explore the entire ocean 

mouse bites™

unfortunately i DID take what you said to heart and now i’m sobbing and debating on whether i should kill you or kill myself

The best part of being asexual is getting to say something mildly enjoyable is better than sex. Like yeah maybe a triple chocolate layer cake is better than Brenda's lame husband's dick, but it feels like a privilege to go "this slice of tomato is better than sex" and mean it

The icon for Banishment is so funny.

Just get outta here. Leave.

 “hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please  the meal would be great”