The Life Of Being Non-native English Speaker And Learning English On Your Own Is So Funny, Because Your

the only way id accept jazz frequently going undercover as a decepticon in fanon is if how he does it is just by being nice and funny. like i bet any decepticon would spill massive intel if they met this guy who made funny jokes and offered to clean their guns sometimes. sure they'd like to punch the rookie around but they mellow out pretty quickly and soon enough they're telling the new guy every detail they know about high command over a few drinks and letting him through restricted areas

I love this in such a weird and wrong way

The council will decide your fate.

Why the hell did I accidentally reblog myself

fun facts about ukrainian vampires (opyr)

• opyri can be of two origins: born and made. made opyri are made by witches, who can smear a baby with blood of a man who went to sleep without praying, thus making the child an opyr.

• opyri have two souls. when opyr dies, only one soul goes to the otherworld. this is why they continue living after death. they aren't immortal though, and only live post-death for seven years. you can presume the person who died was an opyr and will return later if right after their death was a great storm.

• they are very merry fellas and are known to sing, dance and play musical instruments. you can see them partying if you go to the village border at midnight. they also can be spotted smoking a pipe while laying in their coffin.

• opyr can turn into variety of different things: a child, a white or a black dog, a cat, a wolf, a horseman.

• if someone sneezes and you don't respond with "bless you" such person can become an easy target for opyr.

• to get rid of the opyr, you must take them into your arms and carry them across the town or village three times. classical stake to the heart works too.

kitten I’ll be honest the finality of everything in this world haunts daddy like a second shadow

In a lot of vampire lore, being bitten by a vampire just once doesn't turn a human into a vampire, but some sort of a thrall, enchanted and seduced by the vampire's alluring ways, to make the victim more pliable and easy to feed from, and only a sufficiently prolonged and deliberate series of bites will turn the human victim into a vampire.

Which is compatible with the theory that italians are the opposite of vampires. While vampires cannot stand the sight of crosses, stepping into a church, or being exposed to garlic or sunlight, and cannot see themselves in a mirror, italians become miserable if they cannot have access to a church, crosses, direct sunlight, garlic, and getting to see themselves in a mirror.

Consequently, sensually biting the neck of an italian may enthrall one, but will not immediately turn you into an italian. But a sufficiently prolonged and deliberate series of bites may get one to marry you, therefore giving you an italian citizenship.

It's a bit silly, but I remember a year ago I compared the whole Beast-Yeast with Silmarillion for some reason, calling Elder Faerie Manwë Cookie

Well, that's literally what Maiar from there did: shapeshift

It's always "World of darkness isn't supposed to be happy" this and "vampires are monsters" that. Wrong. Why be vampire if not to find eternal love??? Hmm??? HMMMM??! Check mate WOD.

A theory about Sideswipe's personality (WFC/RiD2015)

Honestly, I understand the fandom's skepticism about RiD2015 (even though I don't share it at all lmao), but I still find it interesting to think about the Aligned Universe as something unified, even if Hasbro made a lot of plot and lore holes. For example, Sideswipe was originally supposed to be another character named Fastlane, but he was given the name Sideswipe for marketing purpose. Does this mean it's the same Sideswipe that was in WFC and the novels? People are quick to say no, but realistically there could be a ton of reasons why they are so different from each other. After all, it wasn't canonically debunked like with Grimlock, who isn't the same Grimlock from WFC and has a real name Steelwall.

I personally like to think that it's the same Sideswipe just because it could make him cooler haha

As for the reasons: my personal headcanon is that Sideswipe may have been one of the many Autobots who used mnemosurgery after the war. Removing traumatic memories must've been in demand on Cybertron both during and after the war (in the IDW universe it was also practiced before the war). Maybe the procedure just didn't go well and he «regressed» in a way, but I prefer to think that this was Sideswipe's original personality before the war, that he was like that until it changed him.

I don't think that referring to Sideswipe as a «teenager» or «kid» necessarily hints at his exact age – I mean, Bumblebee was called and treated like that himself 5 years ago in TFP. Maybe he just found someone to take it out on, haha (granted, it's Strongarm who could be an actual teenager, since we don't know anything about her past, she's a new character).

Most bots, from elders like Ratchet, or young ones like Bumblebee, chose to keep their memories to themselves, but Sideswipe may have had his own reasons for deciding to forget about it, and I probably even know which one.

At the end of season 3, Autobots loyal to Optimus appeared on the Council's blacklist and were declared outlaws, but among them was the already dead Tailgate.

Perhaps the compilers of the list simply didn't know about it and included him by mistake. Sideswipe's brother, Sunstreaker, also appeared among them, and... who said he 100% survived the war? I mean, maybe he did, but also – maybe his death was the reason Sideswipe couldn't bear the memories about it and everything related to it.

It's not even necessary that Sideswipe went through the war completely: we don't know where he was between RoTDS and the events of Prime. He could effectively be anywhere: on the other side of the galaxy or lying in stasis on a desolate Cybertron. But when Cybertron was restored and the Autobots returned to a peaceful life, maybe then he realized that he couldn't live like this and used mnemosurgery. That's why he never mentioned Sunny.

Now, I said that the operation might not have been entirely successful (this is a very difficult technique both for the patient and for the mnemosurgeon himself, after all) and instead of completely removing the memories, they could simply be suppressed. That's why he still exhibits the abandonment issues throughout the series and gets clingy after couple of traumatic events in episode 62 – something that could trigger the memories from Sunny's death.

But this also plays out on the other side: when he met Jazz, he began to fanboy over him not only because he was looking for his approval and role model and a crush, but also because it could be «Wow! Wait a minute, I recognize him!🤩», since it's the same guy with whom he beheaded Bruticus Maximus and brought the Autobots their first victory in the war.

Why he specifically disliked Optimus - I don’t know, but since I myself am not a fan of TFP Optimus, I don’t need a reason at all :D

His body design differs significantly from the design in the games (unlike the design of other characters, whose differences are purely stylistic): he, like Starscream, could buy himself a new body in order to «move» into it with a «cleared» mind. Well, we see how did that work out for him.

...that, or he's really just a new character with the same name. But, eh, we already have Grimlock in this team with the «really popular name among dinobots», I honestly find this explanation really boring, as well as the impersonation take. But that's just me, I dunno 🤷🏼‍♀️

Idk about the stained glass from the treasure gacha, but this thing from the guild museum – isn't this Shadow Milk's portrait?

I don't know about the shapes and all, but he seems to have that braid from the portrait in the silhouette of his past self. Also it says that it's the first headmaster of the Blueberry Yogurt Academy, and since it has so many much of his imagery (the eyes and all), this also might mean that Shadow Milk was the founder of the Academy.