I Don’t Know What To Do Anymore I Feel So Dull

I need friends I need help I just need somebody I am drowning

I can’t stop screaming for help god help me PLEse

I don’t feel as hurt as I would’ve back then. I’m still just upset thinking about you too hard though. I hate this shit so much. I just want you to hurt. I dont Even Need you to miss me, I just want you to hurt and realize what you did was wrong. I can’t even understand how you couldn’t see what you did to me was wrong

I have lost the only person who actually cares Color me shocked that’s what happens when you are a disgusting fucking abuser😂😂😂😂😂I have the audacity to bitch and moan when all I do is ruin people’s lives Jesus Christ no wonder my own parents don’t even lvoe me

I’m too flirty while I’m manic I don’t know what’s going on with me

Somebody please fucking help me I can’t take this anymore

Everything I love is being taken away from me and revealing itself to all be a false sense of security I don’t think I need to be here anymore

I’m hurting both physically and mentally it feels like I’m back with Her I just want to be beautiful to you

I just want you back I know I can’t have it and in reality I know it would be terrible to have you back. In reality I don’t even fucking want you back. But im spiraling and im so lost without you. I dont know what to do. I feel I still love you. I dont know what to fucking do. I just dont want to live anymore. I just want to fucking die. I hate you but god I would do anything for you in my life again. I just wish we could reverse time. I wish this didn’t happen. I wish j wasn’t alive

I feel like puking i feel like I’ve just been robbed of all my love and that resulting in my hatred for romance I just . I’m so dysphoric I’m so bitter I’m so angry I just want an escape I just want someone for fucking once to love me and my imperfections and not prefer a specific fucking genital over my entire being I don’t know what to do I don’t believe anyone when they say they love me anymore because they’re fucking lying

I just want to give up on everything I fucking Hate my life I hate romance I hate sex I hate myself I hate everyone I fucking hate existing I just wish I was dead so fucking bad holy fuck I’m going to kill myself maybe that’s what I should do for my 18th birthday just blow my fucking head off