What Are Your Thoughts On Casual Drinking?

I share the same respect for Kim, Paris and Snooky as we all should, but they are famous because, well Kim and Paris posted their sex tapes and snooky... is snooky. Are people being imprudent by knowing their weight, bra size and who they slept with or is society just following for their game? On the topic of celebrity gossip, look up: The Sociology of Gossip: Elaine Lui at TEDxVancouver... Food for thought?

Haha I actually watched that video about a month ago and very much enjoyed it! And I can see her point. For those of you who haven’t watched the video, Elaine Liu studies the trends in celerity gossip and can therefore surmise a lot of information about society’s attitudes towards things like gender role and rape culture. I will concede that it’s a very interesting branch of social science, but that’s just one benefit of celerity gossip. It’s not a reason to partake in celebrity gossip. Because there are also many disadvantages to celebrity gossip. As I said, there’s the violation of privacy. There’s also its effects on us to be considered.

I strongly believe that celebrity gossip erodes our empathy. Elaine said that what we gossip about reveals our attitudes. But the fact that we gossip at all also reveals something about our character. As I said, we treat these people like a commodity for our consumption. That’s damaging to us. As soon as we can mentally distance ourselves from any other human being, we lose a bit of that compassion that connects us all. Empathy means feeling someone else’s pain. But it also means that every single other person in the world deserves kindness because they’re just like you. And as soon as we see someone as a product instead of a person, we lose a bit of humanity.

So when you say stuff like “following for their game” or “Snooki…is Snooki”, I get the feeling that you mean that these celebrities are not being hurt by our gossip because it’s what they want. Again, I would ask you to look in the metaphorical mirror and pause for some introspection. How have we even made it possible for Snooki to make a living by “being Snooki”, which I imagine means being outrageous in all aspects of life? Like, if someone has a great voice or sick musical talent, I’ll support that. If someone is a good actor and I enjoy their work, I’ll reward that by watching their movies. That’s talent, and that’s their job. But I can’t help but feel like my brain cells are dying when I watch Jersey Shore. I don’t want to be a part of an industry that exploits the sex, drugs and drinking of someone’s real, every day life. I don’t want to play their game. I don’t like their rules. So yeah, there’s my take on it. It’s an aspect that I didn’t even mention in the post itself, but I think it’s equally important. :P 

Have a great day! Peace and love! -Katherine

RANT Warning: indelicate language and imagery. Okay, so apparently as much as 54% of men and 42% of women are STUPID. I'm sorry but I'm not gonna be all politically correct about this. Anyone who answered yes to any of those questions is STUPID. STUPID AND WRONG.  For anyone out there who's a little bit confused....

RAPE IS NEVER OKAY. 

No matter what. No matter who long you've been dating, no matter how much money he spent, no matter what her level of sobriety, no matter what he's seen of her or done with her, no matter what mixed signals he's gotten, NO MATTER WHAT. It's not okay to force sex on a woman who does not want it.  And let's just stop and examine two of the conditions up there:  a) He is so turned on he thinks he can't stop. b) She gets him excited sexually. 

Ohmygoodness. MAN UP. Newsflash: Guys get turned on all the time. It's not exactly a novel thing. Guys can get turned on for no apparent reason. 

As a guy, are you seriously gonna try and tell me that you couldn't help it?  (This is where it gets graphic) ...That your dick was hard so you just HAD to ram it inside of her? That's bullshit! (I get vulgar when I get angry).  Oh, you were horny. Oh you poor baby. My heart bleeds for you, it really does.  MAN UP.

You're not an animal. You're not a robot. You don't HAVE to do everything your body wants you to. As a human, you SHOULD have morals. And you are able to reason and make choices. If you know that rape is ALWAYS WRONG (which it is) then you CAN walk away. You are not so weak that you are helpless against the primitive desires of your flesh.  So when I hear someone say something like "he's so turned on he thinks he can't stop" or "she gets him excited sexually", you know what I think? I think that "he" is a cowardly, lazy, spineless, weak, pathetic BOY. Because any man who cannot master his body and decide to respect women despite his physical urges is no man at all. 

Now that I have a Lightbox I can take updated photos of Archibald Asparagus Saint Sebastian

Allow me to introduce myself.

Hey, my name is Katherine. I live in Newfoundland, Canada. I'm 19 years old. I'm in my first year of University, and I'm hoping to get accepted into the school of Pharmacy next semester. I'm a Christian, and you'll hear lots more about that later. Mainly, I am defined by the fact that God made me and Jesus saved me. I like writing, so that's what most of this is gonna be. Thoughts, rants, devos, stories, whatever. Welcome :) Ask me whatever, I don't bite. :) 

Remembering 9/11

Well...there's nothing like a tragedy to bring a nation together, is there? I mean, I live in Canada, and we were rocked by 9/11. The whole world was rocked by 9/11. With good reason. It was a truly horrific event. The sheer symbolism is enough to appall us, and the numbers are truly devastating. There are a couple things that stand out to me when contemplating the memory of the attacks. 

It is not our tragedies that define us, but how we respond to them. America, you're beautiful. The stories of love, selflessness and compassion that have emerged as a result of this tragedy are testaments to the quality of your people. Since then, you have rallied brilliantly, and the construction of the freedom tower in passive defiance to terrorism is admirable. 

Tragedies reveal our character.  Like I said, you're beautiful. And so I know that your country has a beautiful soul, made of raw humanity, love for one another, and resilience. I pray that you won't let petty differences mask that soul. In the light of such an all-consuming and overwhelming tragedy, you can see your fellow human better. And the differences that cloud your view most of the time seem to fade away. You know what I'm talking about. Age, gender, race, and sexual orientation are all secondary to humanity. I pray that you try to remember the love you have for humanity in times of crisis and preserve it in times of peace and prosperity. 

We cannot forget these tragedies.  I know that the news seems saturated with bloodshed. That's because it is. Because the whole entire freaking world is saturated with bloodshed. But we can't turn a blind eye. We can't cover it up. We can't pretend it doesn't happen. And we can't forget it. This violence, this hatred, it's a part of us as a race. The world is ours to own, and look at what we've done with it. We've soaked the soil and watered the trees with our own blood. We've filled the skies with the cries of the innocent being slaughtered. We've written the history of the planet in death tolls. And if we ever hope to change, we cannot forget. We must know where we've been if we want any hope of knowing where we're going. For those who do not know their past are doomed to repeat it. So remember the world's tragedies with reverence and respect, and let that motivate you to strive for a better tomorrow. 

9/11 is no more representative of Islam than the crusades, the Spanish Inquisition or the Holocaust are symbolic of Christianity.  Just because Christianity is the religion of the white majority means that the crimes against humanity committed in the name of our God are forgotten. Of course, these crimes are not truly crimes of Christianity, because as I've said before, my God is a God of love, and not of hate. So as I'm sure you know, the above-mentioned crimes against humanity are not sanctioned or tolerated by the Christian all-loving creator. So why would one believe that 9/11 was sanctioned or tolerated by the Muslim all-loving creator. One of my best friends is Muslim, and all of our conversations about religion reveal that we believe fundamentally the exact same thing. If there is still confusion, one need simply look at the terrorists who committed 9/11 as the Muslim equivalent of the Westboro Baptist Church. Make sense? 

Please let today be a day of remembrance, a day of tolerance, a day of acceptance and compassion, and most of all, a day of hope.  Peace and love :) -Katherine

Is masturbation a sin?

Oi. Okay, um…I won’t say that this is a “complicated” question, per se, but I will say that it’s going to be hard to clearly explain my thoughts on the subject. So just bear with me. 

Disclaimer: because you used the word sin, I’m assuming you want a Christian perspective, which is really the only perspective I give anyway :P So that’s what this will be. 

From a biblical perspective, I think that the act itself of masturbation is not a sin, but the reasons we do it can be sinful. 

A few years ago, I wondered this very thing and I went in search of answers but couldn’t find anything conclusive. There are too many different interpretations of the bible, too many different pastors with different opinions. Since then I’ve matured (a tiny bit) and I’ve come to my own conclusions. And here they are: 

Sexual health professionals say that masturbation is healthy and, of course, they’re right. It’s necessary, in fact. Especially for guys. Male bodies are producing sperm and semen from a pretty young age, waaaaayy before they’re ready to get married and/or have sex. It needs to be ejaculated. You can’t just ignore that. So masturbation is necessary and healthy. Okay, cool. 

Also, the bible, which mentions many other sexual sins and perversions in lurid detail, does not mention masturbation once. NOT ONCE. NOT A SINGLE TIME. Isn’t that odd? Every single other sin is mentioned in the bible, but masturbation is not. Hmm…must be cause masturbation is not a sin! 

But here’s why people might try to convince you it’s a sin, and why you’re wondering whether or not it’s a sin. The bible does mention lust. It compares lust to adultery (Matthew 5:28), it repeatedly tells us to flee from sexual immorality, it speaks of covenant eyes (Job 31:1) so we can safely assume that lust is not a good thing. The catholics even put it in their seven deadly sins! 

And we have a problem because lust is a thing of the heart and the mind, and masturbation is a thing of the body, but the heart and mind are inextricable linked to the body. Therefore, masturbation is *almost* always connected to a sin, because it is accompanied by sexual fantasies about the girl/guy in our english class, or that model; or because it’s accompanied by porn. [Sidenote: porn is definitely sinful. That absolutely falls into the lust category. Also, porn is highly addictive. Like, family-ruining, job-losing addictive. And before you know it, you’re being treated for depression and ADHD when all that was really wrong with you was a porn addiction. See here.] So because we may be struggling in our hearts with lust, we will also be struggling in our bodies with masturbation. I found this quote on this website that I thought explained it rather well: 

“Specifically, if the act is done merely as a hedge against temptation and as thebody requires then there is no need for the above sinful “crutches”. This is hardly exciting, and a rote act of keeping the body in submission. It cannot be done often, as the body is not that demanding if left alone by a perverted imagination.”

So in conclusion, masturbation is not the sickness, but it can be a symptom. I rarely say stuff like this, because I’m not really an authority on…well, anything. However, I want to say it in this situation: IF you (you meaning anyone) feel like you’re struggling with masturbation, here are some things I want to tell you:

1. Bear in mind that masturbation is not the sin. You are probably suffering from some “soul-sickness”. And getting better is not about trying to go as long as you can without masturbating. Trying to go more than 24 hours without masturbating, or trying to go two days, or a week…that’s not dealing with the real issue. That’s just frustrating for you. Getting better is dealing with what’s really going on - your heart and mind are out of line. It might be a porn addiction. It might be frequent fantasizing, or staring a bit too long at that person. Whatever it is, if you deal with that, the masturbating thing will take care of itself. 

2. Don’t be ashamed. Sometimes, the church puts this stigma on sexual sins and we can’t talk about it and it’s all so hush-hush. But it’s better to talk about it than to try to deal with it on your own. That being said, talk to someone you can trust. Someone who loves you. Someone who will be discreet and sensitive and actually try to help. 

3. PRAY PRAY PRAY PRAY! We are not capable of turning off lustful thoughts at the flip of a switch. We do not have that much control over our own thoughts. We need a lot of help. And read your bible, because having your head filled with God’s word is a good way to keep impure thoughts out. 

4. Remember that God loves you and I love you no matter what. :)

Thanks for the question :) I hope that what I said made sense at least, and at best was somewhat helpful. :) Peace and love! -Katherine 

Warning signs of a potentially unhealthy relationship 

What is your biggest regret? None of that "i don't have any regrets" nonsense. Everyone regrets something.

Haha wow, you’re strict! Alright, I promise, no nonsense. To answer your question, it’s not quite that I don’t have any regrets, but I’m too young to have any serious regrets. I regret things like…dating a guy who was too young for me. (That was my biggest regret for years) For a while, I decided that what I really regretted was breaking up with him before I was ready, and not letting the relationship just run its course. Now I’m back to regretting dating him in the first place. I regret dating a guy who didn’t share my faith. I regret not writing down the phone number a guy gestured to me through an airplane window, cause that would have made a great story, but now it’s just a “what if?” I regret being an immature child who was accidentally insensitive and self-righteous and judgmental at times when I came into contact with people who were hurting. Most recently, I regret not taking University seriously and expecting to get my marks as easily as I did in high school. So you know what I mean, I regret little stuff. Nothing that I’ll carry with me to my dying day and whisper on my deathbed. But I agree with you that everyone regrets something. I don’t subscribe to the “it was exactly what you wanted at the time” or “never regret something that made you smile” mentality. I know I’ve made mistakes. So, so many mistakes. Countless mistakes. And there are lots of times that I know I hurt someone and I would like nothing better than to erase that decision I made so that the person wouldn’t be hurt anymore. But that’s life. My mom told me that no one expects me to be perfect (except me) and when we screw up, all we can do is apologize and keep moving forward, trying to do better everyday. Maybe if I’m lucky, my regrets will always be little, silly stuff like they are now. But if I was a bettin’ woman, I’d wager that someday, I’ll have a really big, really painful regret. But I hope when that day comes that I’ll remember that I can’t hold on to my regrets forever, and that I’ll be able to forgive myself and accept my imperfection and embrace the love and grace that God offers me despite me constant failings. :) Peace and love! -Katherine