One Day This Is Going To Be Applied To Like, A Meteor About To Collide With The Sun Or Something, And

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Yes.

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I feel the need to say again, that I am in fact, NOT a Tahitian clam, and don’t produce pearls, much less from my cooter, and would appreciate it if I wasn’t treated as such.

Also to that nurse who told me the speculum would ‘tickle’, WHAT THE FJUCK FREAK SHIT DO YOU GET UP TO IN YOUR SPARE TIME THAT, THAT SENSATION SPECIFICALLY IS A “TICKLE”?!?!

Anyways I unfortunately have to get it done AGAIN because the nurse disregarded me telling them that hey; I was on my period, and that I might be bleeding too heavily for them to get a good cell sample.

But what do I know, right? It’s not like this uterus of mine is attached to me specifically or anything…

I got my first pap done today.

If I never see another speculum again it’ll be too fucking soon.

Imagine you’re out here hosting an orgy and then suddenly this little creature comes along and bites your dicks off and walks away covered in the remnants of your flesh.

Like bro. It’s beautiful, but that is essentially what’s happening here

Ugghhhhhgghhgghfhfhfhfjf ITS so FJUCKINNG PRETTYYYYY

blue jacaranda blossom in 昆明kunming, yunnan province of china

CHAPTER SEVEN IS HERE BABEYYYY

What else am I to slay encroachers with?

JOKES ON YOU IVE ALreaDY DONE THAT

I PLAY STARDEW WHENEVER IM DEPRESSED FIGURE IT OUT FROM THERE

My ninth grade bio teacher handing us a packet to complete and not elaborating but putting far too much emphasis on the fact that penises produce cum twice.

I was extremely uncomfortable. I wish I could’ve just walked out. Her saying that once would’ve been enough. She did not need to describe it and specify multiple times. Almost obsessively so. Filling out my packet on consent and STDs and types of birthcontrol appropriate for each scenario (as if there was a correct answer for any of that on god that shit was graded) wasn’t enough really, but it would’ve been fine if I no longer had to listen to her, a married woman, talk about her experience with penis in a room full of 14 year old boys with the maturity of toddlers. Especially as a recovering victim of rape and sexual assault that never got addressed, having to read scenarios about consent not being respected in those packets already made me very uneasy. Her going on a dick tangent? Yeah no. I was 100% not comfortable.

Oh the conflict of wanting to draw dragon phoenix wright but wanting to write my fanfic or finish a chapter or start the multitudes of others living in my brain rent free.

I have too many choices.

I fully understand Ema. Mad respect for the amount of chemistry she WILLINGLY put herself through while I take yet another chemistry class and watch my academic heart wilt while I chant religiously “I just need to pass, I just need to pass, C’s get degrees, I JUST NEED TO PASS!”

I could never. (I could but I’d want to die a horrible, painful death by the end of it).

If I had to deal with an insufferable bisexual after all that shit too, I’d be throwing more than my snacks. I’d be throwing the luminol at his face and chanting ancient Latin curses, actually.

Me too, Ema. Me too.

“ema skye is annoying” “ema skye is too bitchy” shut up. ema skye canonically has a gun and still has enough restraint not to use it on all of her dumbass coworkers. she just eats snacks and throws them at twinks. she complains about her annoying bisexual worstie to his face. she loves science and hates being a cop. what more could you ask for in a woman