Gentle Reminder To Not Do Shit While Bereaved, I Just Burnt The Shit Outta My Hand Because I Was Crying

I should’ve listened bro I’m pretty sure my immune system collapsed as soon as the stress of finals started waning.

I think I was holding my body together with duct tape and glue, now I think I caught strep again. Ugh.

When I read the asks open pinned post I read "headcanons" as "healthcare" and thought, wow they're knowledgeable aren't they!

Pfgfghhh

It's germ season guys, don't forget yer shots!

I just hate something about being a woman, and that is the fact that no matter how cold hardy I can be (and I am because I nearly had hypothermia once as a child and I’m pretty sure it broke my internal thermostat), for one to two weeks out of a month, because my body in its infinite and unnecessary stupidity just leeches out a shit ton of iron slowly, and suddenly the world is fucking devoid of warmth, and I am left, a half drowned kitten pulled from the depths of a frozen mountain lake, to bundle myself up in dozens of blankets only to find that my fingers and feet are STILL FUCKING COLD. It’s like 100 degrees in my room and I’m STILL IN THREE THICCCC BLANKIES AND IM STILL COLD.

This isn’t fair.

One day this is going to be applied to like, a meteor about to collide with the sun or something, and people will somehow make an act of doomsday into a love poem about a doomed romance wherein both parties inevitably collide and their lives literally crumble as a result of their union. A union of death and utter destruction and one that is inevitable in that its temptation is too great to bear.

Humans can romanticize anything. And not like the fear of nature romanticism. We just want everything to kiss, I think.

well have you considered that maybe the unstoppable force is in love with the immovable object

Considering my irl name is already kind of oxymoronic at face value I could argue that I’m already there. (No you don’t get to know.)

if you were an ace attorney character what would your pun name be

hang on I’m trying to see something

don’t tell me the name of your pet, just tell me in the tags the name you call them that’s got nothing to do with their actual name

This is so phoenix wright coded for no reason.

99% of liars quit before everyone absolutely believes whatever they say forever keep going king

Going to go read through the comments on my fanfic to try and get post-election dopamine to make myself feel less like our planet is going to be functionally dead in the next ten years and industry will be super exploitative

Oh and there’s a gray heart emoji now so I can do this I guess 💜🖤🩶🤍

To be honest I need a fic where Phoenix is replaced with feenie and everyone he knows learns his lore of eating glass and being so down bad for miles that he starts to switch to law for the first time.

I need that almost as much as I need a fic where Miles edgeworth intimidates the shit out of Apollo and Athena until there’s an earthquake or something, and they learn how similar they really are. (I like to think that Edgeworth’s trial was sealed from the public for that one because we all know Apollo is a Phoenix fan boy and he would know about that if it wasn’t)

Something I think about a lot is how as a kid, I picked a bunch of wildflowers for my mom.

I didn’t know what they were, just that they were tall and dainty, and pretty, not to mention they were everywhere.

I knew when I was little that something was very wrong between her and my dad, but seeing me come in, with random bits of dirt on my face (and somehow in my ears too) and all over my hands seemed to make her light up for a moment. She’d even scold me a little when I would bring in a bushel so thick our usual vases and glasses wouldn’t fit them. Even in spite of me picking the yard of our house clean of flowers, those dainty purple stalks would pop back up within weeks like I hadn’t just overharvested what me and my parents thought at the time were random lawn weeds.

Now that I’m older and a bit wiser (and don’t cause a wake of biological destruction in my path), and I know what was actually happening in that house, I think it’s funny. Especially since I’m really fond of flowers and floriography.

I was giving her blue toadflax. That especially looking back on it now is painfully ironic. It’s not a typical bouquet flower, but it does have a meaning.

It’s been a long while since I found the site that listed one of its meanings, but it symbolizes protection, and was said to ward off curses and hexes, or even land stewardship. Others said it symbolized joy and vitality. Emphasis on the protective aspect, and it being a stubborn, determined pioneer plant- you can probably argue resilience too.

I was giving her a fucking protection charm and neither her nor I even knew it. Not until I was like fifteen and saw the flowers again and was like “hmm I wonder what these mean, I used to give them to my mom all the time.”

Damn it if the universe ain’t a petty poetic bitch then what is it even?

If you had a nose that could pick up on delicate chemical trails, I bet you’d be huffing on things too.

God only knows I would. I’d be huffing the hell out of a dark chocolate bar. Fuck yeah. Extend the experience.

animals are quite funny.. you show them a Thing and theyre like "ok i will Sniff this"..