Deluded-wanderer - Deluded Wanderings

You have two coworkers named John, one short and one tall. As you normally would in this situation, you call them Big John and Little John. One day the tall John tells you that he doesn’t like being called Big John. You’re a decent person and stop doing it. It turns out when his depression was at its worst, he gained a lot of weight, and even though he’s lost weight and is secure in his body image, being called Big John reminds him of that time. He’s much more comfortable being called Tall John, Old John, his last name, or just John

You call everyone dude. You were raised in an area where dude is an all-purpose term. One day your coworker Mary tells you that she doesn’t like being called dude. You’re a decent person and stop doing it. It turns out she’s trans, and even though she’s transitioned and is satisfied and secure in her body, being called dude makes her dysphoric. She’s much more comfortable being called girl, pal, or just Mary.

If situation one is so obvious, why isn’t two? Just be a decent person, don’t call people what they don’t want to be called, and don’t make them give you their reasons. It’s that simple

Abled gays celebrating marriage equality: well we sure do have nowhere to go from here when it comes to marriage rights. Gay rights!

Me, a disabled lesbian trying to get on ssi thinking about how I will not be able to marry my girlfriend if I do because I can't have more than $2000 to my name at a time and they count a spouse's income towards that: wow .. gay rights ...

Ouch

Tuh tuh…open sesame

“Every habit produces multiple outcomes across time. Unfortunately, these outcomes are often misaligned. With our bad habits, the immediate outcome usually feels good, but the ultimate outcome feels bad. With good habits, it is the reverse: the immediate outcome is unenjoyable, but the ultimate outcome feels good. […] The road less traveled is the road of delayed gratification. If you’re willing to wait for the rewards, you’ll face less competition and often get a bigger payoff. As the saying goes, the last mile is always the least crowded.”

— James Clear, Atomic Habits

Ducks!

Can you do a type contrast between ISFJ and ISTP using characters as an example? I figure the two types would be quite different.

They use Fe quite differently, as you might imagine.

Think about Prim and Haymitch from The Hunger Games.

As a high Fe / feeler, Prim genuinely cares about people and their needs and their emotional state. She is more effective than her sister at figuring out people’s emotional motives and helping them through them, and has chosen a profession for herself which enables her to directly assist people in a tangible way. She is quiet, thoughtful, insightful, and hard-working, with a tender heart. She loves all creatures, even her mangy old cat. Prim excels in one specific thing (medicine) and has become very good at it through repeated usage of / interest in it (Si finding a favorite niche, unique to themselves).

Haymitch approaches Fe in an analytical, detached way -- he uses it purely to gain sponsorships and ensure his own and Katniss’ survival, reminding her she must be ‘likable’ in order to gain sympathy from the audience. This illustrates the difference between the genuine concern of high Fe and using it to an advantage, to support a logical conclusion (she needs sponsors, they must learn to like her, ergo -- be flattering and appealing to get what you want -- something Katniss as an ISTJ doesn’t understand, because to her, it’s insincere). He did whatever he had to in the arena to survive, he has no specific way he approaches life (winging it and thinking the kids will have no choice but to do so, in the arena), and he longs for freedom from constraints. He’s opportunistic (Se) not studied (Si).

- ENFP Mod

I used to be a grader and an occasional substitute prof for an introductory astronomy lab. That means that the majority of the people in this lab are only taking it because it’s a requirement and about half of them think it’s an astrology class.

I was grading midterms and this one girl. She was so nice and I think she was a business major. Fuck. The question on the midterm was to draw a diagram of the solar system and this poor girl. This fucking girl had drawn a Mars-centric solar system. As in every planet and the sun were orbiting Mars. I now actually have a custom Cards Againsy Humanity card I got at a con that says “A Mars-centric solar system”

I had a boy argue with me that there was liquid water on the moon (this was around when they had found liquid water on Mars in ~2015) and he wouldn’t believe me that he likely meant Mars and not the moon. After I marked his answer to the relevant lab question wrong, he took it to the department head who had promptly laughed him out of the office.

And there was another boy who, during a lab in our observatory where we would look at certain things in the sky, asked where the sun was. At 10pm in November. After some questioning it was revealed that he thought the moon and the sun were the same thing.