“Come On, Gege,” Hua Cheng Whispers. “You’ll Feel So Much More Comfortable In Clean Clothes.”

Based on this post that has been stuck in my head for ages- the three straightest guys lmao

And also their husbands having a similar conversation

Guys I'm so normal about all of these books don't @ me lol

Mu Qing, grinning: Before you were what? 

Feng Xin: Before I was- 

Mu Qing: What? 

Feng Xin: Before I was inter-

Mu Qing: Before you were interrupted? 

Feng Xin: Cut me off one more time and I swear I'll- 

Mu Qing: What? 

Feng Xin: *makes frustrated sound* 

Xie Lian, nervously: Stop that. Before he hurts you.

"WILL YOU CHANGE??"

Always wanted to illustrate that one scene...

classiccccc

Mdzs as a d&d game.

Dm: You are dropped into the Burial Mounds

Wwx: Can I survive this?

Dm: Make a constitution roll

Wwx: Nat 20

Dm: Alright, you survive. Now tell me how

Jc: I try to prove that it's Wei Wuxian

Dm: Roll for perception and charisma

Jc: 15 and 3

Dm: While there is almost no doubt in your mind that Mo Xuanyu is actually Wei Wuxian, you have no real means to prove it. You have to let the group leave

Lwj: I drag Wei Ying to the inn

Wwx: Hey! How come he gets to know who I am without a perception check?

Dm: Because you practically told him

Lwj: I would like to seduce Wei Ying

Dm: Roll for charisma

Lwj: 18

Dm: Alright. You tell Wei Wuxian in as simple terms as your drunk self can manage, how much he means to you. Wei Wuxian, roll for perception

Wwx: My dice just rolled off the table and into the trash

Dm: Unfortunately, the love of your life is stupid

Please somebody, get Bichen away from wwx

MXTX protags my beloved. Prettyboy table for the win

Bonus page:

Relax

hc that lan wangji wrote a shit ton of poetry. from when he met wei wuxian, he was constantly writing poems about him. after he died, the poems turned from passionate and hopeful to mourning, just as lwj did. after wwx returned, there wasn't really much time to write, what with them running around the jianghu mystery-solving, but once everything has settled down and they're living together, wwx finds the poetry hidden in the jingshi. there are hundreds of pages, enough to fill dozens of books, and the vast majority of them are very clearly about wwx. before this, there was a part of wwx that still thought this was temporary, that lwj would get tired of him and he would be thrown out. but reading the poems lwj had written over the years destroyed that doubt. wwx saw so much of what lwj's life had been like, while wwx was dead; some of the pages were spotted with tears, even blood. many were smudged, or had been crumpled and smoothed out. by the time lwj returns to the jingshi after his duties, wwx is lying on the floor, tear tracks staining his face, surrounded by the contents of lwj's heart.

Wei Wuxian: So I've tried every talisman, array, curse, whatever, that I can think of, and I do think it's actually impossible for me to get pregnant.

Shen Qingqiu: Oh. That's something you want to do. Well in my world it's been theorized that impregnating a man would not be beyond the powers of a demon lord, but I haven't allowed Binghe to try and figure out if it's true. Ha! With all the ridiculous shit Airplane added to my world I wouldn't be surprised if we have a plant or spell or something that can let a man get pregnant.

Wei Wuxian: ...what.

Xie Lian: My world has a pill that a man can take to let him get pregnant.

Wei Wuxian: you're telling me that both of your worlds have male pregnancy aids?

Shen Qingqiu: hey, I only said that I wouldn't be surprised if it did...

Xie Lian: Actually I could probably change genders to get pregnant too. Or I could impregnate San Lang. I guess there are a few different options.

Wei Wuxian: ....

Wei Wuxian tapping the glass of his enclosure: I want to talk to the person in charge here. MXTX I need a word.