Wooww I'm So Normal So Normal Me I'm Normal Normal Like Me Like Normal Me Normal Totally Wow Normal Me

I liked how you tagged Alexander j newall like he was also an avatar of the beholding

Why would an avatar of the watcher kill someone they compelled ? Wouldn't they just keep them alive so they can watch ?

why are we underwater

the fuck do you mean. which part of the phrase hetero jessica is against community guidelines

malevolent being the longest DND game ever played <- said by someone who doesn't play dnd

look i believe in eating the elephant and shit but this elephant is a fucking fatass

the thing that drives me crazy sometimes is the fact if you compare jarthur s1 and s5 you will get a wildly queer experience full of shared history and loyalty and love and then look at when they first met and you will be surprised that they even managed to get to the point where theyre pretty much soulmates. take that as you will.

every. time. I hear John's voice in ep 1 it drives me fucking nuts. That's the John Doe we know? The one that became so, so human fucking nyarlathotep however-you-type-his-name Kayne ended up following the dude that made him like this. AND GET REALLY INTERESTED. THATS HIS SPECIAL INTEREST, RIGHT THERE. ARTHUR, HOW DO YOU DO IT?

Arthur. Arthur in ep 49 was definitely considering letting go. Idk what to tell you, he was genuinely going to give up. Throughout the season post Horigvirus 19 he had been gradually getting sicker, and sicker, and sicker, hell, did he eat?? Did he drink??? Did he enough???? Bro was barely able to stand, and I would know what it's like to be that sick. You can't do anything, you really just don't have the energy to.

Let me cook, JOHN, GUYS. JOHN WAS THE ONE WHO MANAGED TO PICK HIM BACK UP. If he simply said "Orthur...Oscars letter....if there was a message before, it's indecipherable now," then Arthur may have just said, "Well, that's my lot," and went to sleep forever. No one knows Arthur better than John and no one knows John better than Arthur himself. They are literally eye roommates. They are married in the brain. John knew that he had to say something, anything to MOTIVATE Arthur into fighting back, into getting up, because Arthur Lester ALWAYS gets up. That's what John hates and loves about him. That's what Kayne chose him for. That's the sole reason Arthur has survived this far.

Prison pits? Arthur would've gone insane if it weren't for John, keeping him company and stopping him from going insane to the best of his ability. Kellin and the pier? Literally dragged his ass to civilization when Arthur was comatose for months. Larson's manor? We know what Arthur is like without his John, acting as both his companion and rock. Yellow I love you, you were just born at the wrong place at the wrong time :((

They will literally drive me insane. I just might jump off a cliff. If Arthur has to choose between his beloved daughter and his beloved fragment of an eldritch god, I swear he better choose his homeboy. Put his ass in a human body! Let him touch grass! We did NOT go through several arcs of Arthur moving on from accidentally killing his baby girl just for her to come back and for everything to be okay. Faroe is much happier dead than dealing with school and real life, trust /j

what the hell, sure. Tldr: they are horribly perfect for each other and they would probably implode the moment the other dies and they are left alone. Yeagh. Can't wait for ep 50. Can't wait for s6. Wonder what kind of wacky shenanigan they'll get themselves into this time. I miss Oscar.

"I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul."

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUUPPPPP

a comic about fix-it fanfics

THAT CHINESE RESTAURANT TEN MINUTES FROM MY PLACE OF RESIDENCE BACK HOME 😁😁😭😭😭😭😁😭😁😭😭😭

reblog this and tag with a food you no longer have access to (closed restaurant, state you moved away from, ex’s mom’s cooking, etc) that will haunt you until your dying day, mine are the spicy chicken sandwich on the employee menu at the fine dining restaurant I was a prep cook at, and the onion bagel from the kosher place down the street from my house when I lived in the city

"I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul."

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUUPPPPP

I'm so so sorry but the thought of alia seeing John, the eldritch creature that is a fragment of the king in yellow as a nondark entity is so. SO GODDAMN REWARDING. THAT'S EXACTLY WHY WE'RE HERE!! JOHN DOE GROWING AS A PERSON, BECOMING ALL THINGS HUMAN GOOD AND BAD....he is not a malicious, dark entity anymore. He is not a fragment of the king in yellow. He's just John. John Doe. As small as it is, compared to the real thing, he really is the captain of his soul. Kill me now

malevolent chapter 49 spoilers!

(the most rambling of thoughts)

-i went into this episode with some spoilers cause i couldn’t listen to the ep until late in the evening, and couldn’t help myself when it came to browsing tumblr

those were: oscar’s letter being illegible ( not too surprised about that one, given the constant rain, the mud, the blood loss, and the swimming/wading through bodies of water. i’d have been shocked if it survived)

arthur lester crashes out (again)

arthur and john reunited with the dearly beloved and missed cast member: “falling in holes”

and arthur uses All Of The Bullets

this turned the episode into a fun mystery game for me (on top of the in-episode murder mystery), trying to figure out when these things would occur

anyway onto the actual episode

- we saw it a lot last episode but i looooove seeing how much john is stepping up and pulling extra weight for arthur while he’s unwell. it’s sooo different from the dysfunctional dynamic they had when dealing with other people during season 4.

i’ll never get tired of seeing the contrast against past events of how far the boys have come and changed

-arthur sure is doing. Really! Bad! uh oh!

-despite that he still gets some great great spotlight of his people skills, dealing with the suspicious and unpredictable castle gang, and the one-on-one intimidation with the friar

-the friar in fact, did not do it, as i thought, but the lord everard reveal is way more interesting so i like this outcome

-something about benevolent christmas special referencing the falling in holes thing, and a new incident of Arthur and John Fall in a Hole being in an episode that released on christmas day is very funny to me, even though i know the part of the episode featuring Falling in a Hole most likely released a couple weeks ago

- arthur giving up because he doesn’t believe that on a fundamental, physical level he’s capable of pushing on and surviving is so heartbreaking to listen to.

despite knowing this is Malevolent, i somehow wasn’t expecting to get emotional this episode!

i got lulled into a false sense of security by the previous episodes (which were pretty chill, compared to the standard), even though i knew they were luring me into a false sense of security

- john reciting Invictus to arthur is so ougggh aggghh oof ouch my heart, i loved it. but also it makes me crazy and i can’t stop thinking about it because

when arthur has referenced pieces of Invictus in the past, john didn’t recognize it.

since john has picked up knowledge of human experiences and poetry from arthur, in some sort of bleed-over of knowledge due to their shared state of being, we can assume that Invictus is not among that selection that bled over.

when john asks about it, arthur specifically says it’s “not for you”, keeping a poem that’s so meaningful to him close to his chest.

it makes sense, this was during the prison pits, and the last thing that arthur shared that was important to him, was wielded against him, painfully.

arthur does recite Invictus to yellow, but he was drunk/poisoned, and given the way he brushes off questions the next day, i assume he wouldn’t have freely recited it had he had all of his faculties about him.

but now, after all that’s happened, how arthur and john’s relationship has changed so drastically from the way it was in the dreamlands.

now john has been able to pick up the poem, accumulated as part of the bleed-over knowledge. i don’t think there’s any conscious control on the part of either party when it comes to what knowledge is shared with john, but it feels significant that Now he has access to it, after all this time.

and what he does with it, is he uses it to raise arthur up. to support and try and encourage arthur to push on. head bloodied, but unbowed.

these two make me so crazy it’s insane!!!!!!!

- anyways, because i’m also crazy about kayne, when john mentioned the coin, and then a voice that i didn’t immediately realize was everard spoke, i did very briefly freak out going “omg kayne??? kayne??? kayne???” before coming to my senses.

- also it’s delightful that the boys found an ally here?? i really wasn’t expecting that honestly, after season four, given the circumstances they were placed into, i thought this season would be a return to form of the pair having no one they can safely trust, other than themselves. very neat to be proven wrong!

and it’s a very delightful way to twist it that ultimately they can’t rely upon/work with this ally in the end, because they’re stuck working for one of those very “dark forces” that everard is working against.

- YAY WAHOO for arthur getting healed from his sickness, but i am very curious about how the next episode will go, given that it’s “not simple” and “will take some time”.

it’s possible there will be a short time skip, but i feel like an episode about curing a magical sickness and ridding arthur of horrig’s influence, has potential to be another character development bottle episode of sorts, like The Nightmare.

also can alia detect john?? will she be able to detect john when healing arthur??

what if she deems john as some “dark force” that arthur needs healed from as well

or what if she deems john is Not a “dark force” (that one would make me cry)

i can’t wait for the next ep