First Meetings Who Wrote That Masterlist!

I must be the weirdest student. Can figure out complicated cataloguing systems because it Just Makes Sense. Struggles with assessment scenario because she got paralysed drafting an email to a fictitious manager because she didn’t know how Formal they wanted it to be.

My tutor: so do you need any help with understanding the cataloguing systems?

Me, absent-minded: oh nah that’s fine, I can do that

My tutor: haha wow you must be blazing through this topic the—

Me, on the verge of anxious tears: but how do I format an e-mail to a fictional manager I’ve never spoken to before I’m so confused

-

My teacher: can anyone explain ISBN?

Me: (starts to detail what ISBN is with great articulation)

My teacher: so here’s an exercise question for the last half an hour of class, feel free to ask any question— oh yes?

Me, emanating Super Anxious Vibes: so like. what exactly are we doing?

My teacher: uh. It’s all written in the question.

Me: no I know. I understood the sentence. But. How. How do you want us to do it? I’m— I’m confused.

My teacher: ???? Is this the same person??? What?

Penis decanter

[ link on amazon... ]

AU where Jason gets over his theatre-kid need for dramatics and heat never reveals his identity to the batfam. In fact, he HIDES his identity so well that no one ever finds it out. It’s been years since Red Hood popped up and at this point he’s an unofficial vigilante with crime lord tendencies than anything else

then people start getting suspect . . . But not the right thing

Red hood: *sitting, legs crossed, on a roof ledge* scare me and make me drop my book and l don’t care if you helped me with Penguin last night, I’ll throw you off this roof and I won’t give a shit Nightwing: *slowly jacks away* um. What book? Red hood: pride and prejudice. Nightwing: pride and . . . You know, my brother liked that book. Red hood: I know he did Nightwing:

Damian: *feeling uncertain with his title as Robin* Red Hood: you know, a wise kid once said Robin is magic Batman: *eyes narrow* what kid? Red Hood: eh, just someone I used to know Batman:

Spoiler: so why did ya decide to protect the alley? Red Hood: I lived there as a kid. I . . . Uh, it just means a lot to me. Spoiler: *frowning* I assumed you’d lived there. Red Hood: yeah it um . . . *thinking of Bruce* I met someone important there. He changed my life. And when . . . I, uh, lost him, I decided to clean it up. Spoiler:

Later, in the bat cave:

Spoiler: so Red Hood . . . Batman: *gravely* dated Jason. Nightwing: but he was only fifteen! Robin: *crossing his arms* people date at fifteen, Richard. Red Robin: . . . The crime lord dated the second Robin. Batman: I’m going to kill him. Nightwing: wait, no! You can’t! Jason wouldn’t have wanted it! Black Bat: he’s family. Spoiler: *jazz hands* NEW BROTHER

Red Hood: *listening in through their comms* what the fuck

I'm about to wii sports resort to violence

Uh so I made a character bingo if anyone wants to try it (:

There are a lot of What-ifs when it comes to jason todd. What would've happened if bruce didn't take jason in? what if jason was taken in by selina and became stray? what if jason didn't die?what if jason was found before the lazarus pit? but one that i don't see at all is what if jason didn't come back and just stayed with the All Caste?

The Lost Days arc would go about the same as in canon (without the talia thing because ew), but after the car bomb thing doesn't pan out jason just starts looking into the batfam more. He sees his dad for the first time in years. He forgets everything and considers coming back home.

But then he finds out how his death was handled

Of course he'd still be pissed off about tim becoming robin, but more than that bruce and dick spun it so people though tim was the second robin. Jason's whole identity was usurped, and was prompted by alfred of all people. Add to that the memorial case and the victim blaming, as well as him not having a memorial in titans tower and tim talking shit about him every chance he gets and jason starts to lose hope. But these things could be fixed! These could all be explained away as emotionally incompetent people compartmentaling in order to get over their grief! right?

Then he finds the footage of dick killing the joker for tim. Sure, the joker taunted dick using jason's memory, but it was him thinking tim was dwad that really set him off. The final nail in the coffin would be bruce reviving the joker. Jason now has proof that 1. tim was indeed his replacement, and 2. Bruce's morals and dick's clean hands are worth more than his mangled corpse.

He scraps all of his plans because now he KNOWS that bruce would never kill the joker for him. Disillusioned with bruce and gotham in general, he sneaks into arkham and pits a bullet in the joker's skull, then goes to the all caste for training. If they didn't care about him, why should he care about them?

I think ducra would be less wary about training jason in this au, since his drive for revenge had dissipated, and he wouldn't "bring great evil into this world."

Since ducra wouldn't really show favouritism to jason, since he isn't as much of a flight risk or a time bomb, i think his and essence's relationship would go way better than in canon. Their main points of contention were jason leaving the caste and ducra's favouritism, and without those 2 factors, their relationship could actually flourish.

Due to the all blades being linked to the soul, it would make sense if the caste taught soul magic. This would make jason a way better fighter than any baseline vigilante or assassin. Maybe he could use his abilities to hide his body language to avoid shiva and cass' ability? The all caste doesn't get massacred here, so he learns how to really socialise, talk with people with different experiences, so he could occasionally go back to the alley or the hill to reconnect with his old friends, like dana or numbers, since he wouldn't push people away like in canon.

The untitled wouldn't be as big of a threat as they were in RHatO since there are way more people available, and jason being super trained, so maybe jason would adopt a new vigilante identity to help people on a more personal level. He considers going by Red Hood, as a taunt to the man that killed him, but he doesn't like it. It's a remnant of a past he'd rather forget. Maybe he'd go by cardinal, but he doesn't want to be associated with a bird anymore. I think marauder would be a really good name for him, a man who goes around looking for things to steal and people to fight.

You can have him interact with some justice league dark members, especially Constantine since I really like their dynamic, and he could deal with hellspawns since he wields the allblades now.

JayEssence is a rarepair, which is a shame since i think these 2 could have a really interesting dynamic if written properly, so I'd probably go with that as the endgame ship, but you could work in so many of his ships. JayRose? childhood friends on the titans who reconnected after jason studied under slade for a bit. JayEddie? same thing but they reconnect in hell. Jaytemis? they could run into eachother during a mission and they'd recognise death anywhere. enemies to reluctant allies to lovers. JayDana? classic childhood friends to lovers. The possibilities are endless

PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU VOTE!

ok probably ooc but what if Tim kinda sees Bruce as his son. He hangs up Bruce’s weird ramble papers like you would a child’s drawing. He praises Bruce when he does something well, scolds him when he does something bad.

Tim has no reason to see Bruce as a father figure, but he has every reason to see him as a son. Plus, Bruce is always adamant that Bruce will never his dad, not the other way around

Jason: “he replaced me with you! A new shiny son since his first one died cause of him!”

Tim: “I.. believe you misunderstand my relationship with the Batman.”

Bruce should be named Billy cause he is the Batson

Tim puts little gold stars on the mission reports Bruce does well on and has a chart to track how well the man is doing at self-care tasks. Surprisingly, the frowny stickers are very effective at shaming Bruce. Maybe it's the disappointment of an inanimate object, maybe it's because a child is putting up the stickers, but Bruce hates seeing when a new one has been added to the list.

It would be hilarious if Tim pulled out the list for Jason and Damian too. He has sections for "insults," "murders," "knife pulled," and "bodily harm to family members."" He doesn't tell them he's the one doing it, though, cause it wouldn't be as effective. They just appear in a common area one day for all the Bats to witness.

Alfred puts ones up for the others as well.

Valerie Gray gets a Security Job in Gotham

So, basically, Valerie's dad gets a new high paying Security Job at Wayne Tech, and he decides to bring his daughter into the Business since she can use her Red Huntress Skills

Not like she's gonna have much use for them, Phantom managed to establish a peace treaty between the Ghost Zone and Amity Park, so now there's no need for a Professional Ghost Hunter/Hero.

Also, she kind of needs to get away from that period in her life, and maybe move on from her breakup with Danny (and the argument that happened after the reveal)

So Val applies for the Wayne Tech Job alongside her dad, and during the Interview she manages to reveal most of her secrets, by the virtue of the face that she doesn't really care anymore. Not like it matters at all.

...

Interviewer: So, do you have any reverent work experience?

Val: I'm a retired successful Superhero from Illinois, Red Huntress, and I managed to fight off multiple Other Dimensional beings during that time. I also have experience traversing dimensions if that's helpful.

Interviewer: Uh...

...

Interviewer: How do you feel about fighting super-powered Villains once a week?

Val: Please, those guys are cool and all, but many of the Ghosts I've fought have the same powers but dialed up to eleven.

Interviewer: OK, gonna have to look that one up later...

...

Interviewer: How would you deal with attempted Theft by a Super-powered Rouge?

Val: Aim for the knees.

Interviewer: Can you elaborate?

Val: Aim for the Knees. Then the [REDACTED]

Interviewer: Remind me not to get on your bad side...

...

Inrerviewer: How do you feel about potentially/probably dying on the job?

Val: Basically everybody in my town is so Ecto-Iradiated to an absurd extent. If I got killed I would just become a Ghost and be back in by Monday.

Interviewer: OK that's just ridiculous

Val: My Ex's dog, Cujo, was killed while working as a Security dog, and came back to work the next week. If he can do that, I can do the same.

...

Interviewer: *pulls off fake Groucho Marks glasses to reveal Tim Drake* I regret deciding to review this batch myself.

You guys rlly don't realise how much knowledge is still not committed to the internet. I find books all the time with stuff that is impossible to find through a search engine- most people do not put their magnum opus research online for free and the more niche a skill is the less likely you are to have people who will leak those books online. (Nevermind all the books written prior to the internet that have knowledge that is not considered "relevant" enough to digitise).

Whenever people say that we r growing up with all the world's knowledge at our fingertips...it's not necessarily true. Is the amount of knowledge online potentially infinite? Yes. Is it all knowledge? No. You will be surprised at the niche things you can discover at a local archive or library.