Reblog To Give Prev A Fucking Break Holy Shit Y’all

starting a collection. I'm calling it autistic sexting

yeah golden retreiver boyfriends are great and I've met several personally, but personally I have a house cat boyfriend

extremely affectionate despite of seeming aloof and politely distant to unfamiliar people

my friends have seen him irl less than 5 times in the five years I've had him - if I invited people over he would hide under furniture until they're gone

haha you got up from your work desk, time for unskippable 35 minutes of kisses and cuddles

can and will throw up out of sheer anxiety because Things And Events Are Happening that do not even involve him in any way

can instinctively sense exactly when I am going to decide I'm done bedrotting and will climb on top of me to cuddle exactly 3 minutes before I was just about to get up

can be placed sideways on any soft surface at any time of the day and immediately takes a five hour nap

cannot eat or drink in unfamilair places. can and will go 16 hours without food or water if the situation is uncomfy.

unhelpful but valiant efforts to try to protect and rescue you from things and situations that he would personally hate being in, out of not understanding of Why Are You In There Voluntarily

will come show me incomprehensible memes the same way a cat will bring you a random bug. thank you. I do not understand it but I know you brought it to me because you love me.

LISTEN OK it *may* have happened again and now we have a boyfriend too.

university is like a video game. you can pick up sidequests. Youre gonna neglect the main storyline. youre gonna end up in a guild of sorts. i just looted a bush on campus and found a sticker

reblog if you wear glasses. too many mutuals don't know they have glasses wearers in their midsts

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

An ad for your deepest desires :)

"why do I feel so terrible?"

-person who forgot to take their not-feeling-terrible medication