Butterflytaeil - Waffle Penguin

like this | hendery

Pairing: HENDERY x reader Genre: angst, fluff, crack Word Count: 11.7k Warnings: language, tough love, friends (lowkey) calling Lucas stupid, some medical terms that I have no idea if I used them correctly, implied major character death, please can I stop giving warnings because it might spoil the story lmao Summary: A game of push and pull between two young friends who took the world's time before they love each other freely. Hendery has been very vocal with his love for you and gave you what others cannot— time. Will a patient heart be rewarded when time starts to run out? A/N: there are past and present scenes! It might be a little confusing at first, but I’m pretty sure you’d know almost instantly whether you’re reading the backstory or present. AND let’s just all assume that all four of them are taking the same courses and same classes.

Taglist: @chenlewifey @chichhihaa @jenyongcas @kuncitizen @jaeyongii @arrasuh @thejeongjaehyun @kimga @jenosbliss @linohues @legbouk @cuteejeno @bethm5 @chocojae @grapesuns

You say it's not supposed to be Tell me not to waste my time This was never up to me But if it was I wouldn't mind

“How many times should I turn you down for you to leave me alone, Hendery?” You asked exasperatingly to the man beside you, making him giggle.

“What? It’s not like I wanted to sit beside you. I have no other place to sit.” He said, shrugging his shoulders while taking out his books and putting them on the table.

You looked around the room and laughed under your breath. “We’re literally the only people here.” You said bewildered.

“I have no other place to sit that I like. You never let me finish.” He said and winked at you with a grin on his face. The door opened, Xiaojun and Lucas came in. “Oh look, other breathing beings.”

Hendery is someone you could describe as happy, thoughtful, kind and persistent.

Happy because he’s someone who would always bust everyone a lung from laughing, he’s the only one that could turn your bad day around easily. Someone that would put everyone special to him first before himself without second thoughts.

Kind because he’s someone who looks over people’s differences and makes someone feel accepted whatever shape or form.

Persistent. Hendery has been courting you for the past eight years. Since the first time he laid eyes on you in freshman year of high school, he knew you were someone worth the wait.

He’s not just someone who bugs you every day since you were a bunch of teenagers. Hendery is a friend and one of the closest friends you have.

“Is he bothering you again?” Xiaojun asked as he placed himself in front of you, also taking out his books and notes.

You were about to answer but Hendery cut you off. “What else is new?” He answered for you nonchalantly while keeping his eyes on his book.

You pointed at him, looking at Xiaojun with your mouth agape, “Case in point.” You proved.

“Why are you all studying?” Lucas asked out of the blue, putting both of his elbows on the table when he realized that the three of you had your books out.

“I still wonder how you managed to get to senior year, but whatever you're doing, mad respect man. It's hard to be you in college.” Hendery said, making everyone laugh.

“Concentrate, Dery.” You laughed. “You don’t have time to joke around with Lucas when you just failed your quiz last week.”

Hendery frowned, “I’m just one correct answer short!”

“No, you really have to study. Even I found it easy. You’re literally the only one who failed that quiz.” Lucas added, making Hendery frown even more.

“What a burden. I don’t understand why it’s hard for me to concentrate these days.” He said in all seriousness and when he realized that all three of you are sharing a concerned look, he blinked and smiled it off, “Maybe because I’m missing you my love, my dove, my forever Y/N.”

“Maybe because all you know is how to flirt. Study your damn notes.” Xiaojun said and raised his hand, acting like he was going to hit Hendery.

And I’m trying to ignore you I try to go on with my day, hey But I still pick up the phone, yeah And get lost in what you say

First day of high school. Like everyone, you dressed in your new clothes and fixed your hair in the best way you possibly could. You’ve heard that high school could either be hell or heaven for anybody; you just have to play your cards right.

You don’t really care about popularity and shit like that, but you also didn’t want to be bullied just like how ‘high school rejects’ are in the movies. Putting your best front but not trying too hard is what you’ve decided to go on with.

Your first day of high school is very nerve-wracking, but thanks to Xiaojun, whom you've been friends with since last year, you’re going to have someone you know in your class. You stuck with him the whole day and he did the same with you. Both of you looked shy and scared, which is understandable. Every student here is probably feeling as nervous as both of you.

Well everyone except for this guy.

You watched how this guy walks up to everyone and introduces himself to every living person he runs across. Hendery. You’ve heard his name enough times today to burn that name in your brain. He’s walking around the classroom like it’s his birthday party, asking everyone how his spaghetti was.

You closed your eyes and rested your head on Xiaojun’s shoulder. You just couldn’t wait to get home and go back to sleep, your headache is killing you.

“Hey, how are you guys?! I’m Hendery!” You heard an unusually high-pitched voice for a teenage boy.

You opened your eyes and saw Xiaojun enthusiastically shaking Hendery’s hand. “I’m Xiaojun, nice to meet you!”

“Yeah, you as well!” Hendery’s gaze went to you, “And you are?”

The pain in your head is still throbbing, you just want to get over this unnecessary introduction.

“Y/N” You plainly said and gave him a timid smile. He returned the gesture and quietly walked back to his seat.

You went back to your position and tried to sleep, but Xiaojun is talking non-stop about his new mp3 player and how it shuts the noises around him, making you wonder if his mp3 player could shut him up too.

“Xiaojun, I’m having a headache. Stop talking about your freaking mp3 player please for the love of God.” You said, eyes closed and your head still resting on his shoulder.

He chuckled and aggressively put the left earpiece on your ear. “Stop being cranky. Here. Listen to some Jason Mraz.”

You laughed and pinched him on his side which made him yell and pinch you back that ended up in tickling and slapping each other’s hands away.

On the other side of the room, Hendery is watching you laugh and play with Xiaojun. He didn’t realize he was smiling to himself at the sight of the two of you laughing wholeheartedly. He knew that was the genuine you, not the shy and timid girl he just now.

Something in him feels envious of the friendship you and Xiaojun had. The two of you seemed so comfortable with each other and he also wanted to be a part of it. That’s when Hendery found himself trying to get closer with you and Xiaojun.

You noticed the next day that he moved seats next to the two of you. He would also chime in the conversations you were having and would bring snacks to share with you and your friend. You know what he was trying to do and if you’re going to be honest you’re a little skeptical if you’re going to let Hendery in your duo.

But soon enough, you’re the one who would include him in the conversation, Xiaojun would invite him to study together and he would ask one of you for help when he’s confused about something.

The three of you started building relationships in and outside of school like eating at McDonald’s during lunch break, watching movies after school or going to arcades during the weekends.

At first, Hendery is like a pest that you just couldn’t get rid of, but little by little he is slowly claiming himself a spot in your duo.

In the end, he got the friendship with you and Xiaojun that he wanted. Now, you couldn’t imagine life without Hendery’s comedic stunt every day and how your cheeks would hurt with so much laughing because of him. Being friends with Hendery doesn’t feel forced or fake, but it feels natural and destined like he’s been a friend for a very long time.

Your phone rang and you were startled at the ringtone you used for this caller ID. You could tell who’s calling just by listening to it.

“Dickhead. You’re such a dickhead and everybody knows it, everyone but you. You’re a dickhead. I hope you’ll soon be dead. And this is payback time for what you put me through.” You sang along, giggling alone in your room.

The call went to voicemail and you went back to studying, but not a second later your phone rang again, playing the same tune for the second time.

You specifically set this ringtone for him so you won’t feel bad for not answering your phone because you actually enjoyed listening to the song whenever he calls.

Just as usual, you ignored the call and let it ring a few more times. 5 minutes later, your phone is still ringing and the song is starting to drive you crazy. You slammed your pen on your desk and groaned before answering it.

“Finally! Why are you not answering my calls?!” He shouted from the other line.

“What do you want, Hendery?” You asked, and leaned back to your seat. “I’m studying so make it quick.”

He scoffed. “Want to eat snow with chocolate syrup?” Hendery suggested cheerfully making you laugh and roll your eyes at the same time.

This is the reason why you don’t want to answer his calls. It’s not because you don’t like talking to him or you find him annoying, but because you’d always get lost in what he says. You stop noticing the time and forget your priorities when it comes to him.

“You never run out of stupid ideas, do you? You know snow is dirty right?” You asked, with a smile on your face.

He chuckled but pretended to be offended. “Just because you have a sad and boring life doesn’t give you the right to call my ideas ‘stupid’” He ended the call right after he said that.

You laughed out loud looking at the screen of your phone where Hendery sent a series of text after text.

Hen 🐔: i didn’t really like the way u treated me just now Hen 🐔: and if u think u could apologize Hen 🐔: u are wrong y/n Hen 🐔: so wrong Hen 🐔: and u are going to regret this Hen 🐔: u are very boring & u dont have life Hen 🐔: from now on i will call u no fun nora Hen 🐔: no fun nora

You shook your head, smiling like an idiot and turned your phone over to go back to studying. “What a dickhead.” You mumbled.

An hour later, you received a text message from Xiaojun that they went out to get shaved ice without you.

“That’s what he meant y/n!” Xiaojun laughed on the other line. You just had to call to tell him what happened in your confusing conversation with Hendery earlier.

“He should’ve said shaved ice, not snow! How am I supposed to know he’s not talking about the actual snow?!” You almost screamed trying to deliver your point.

It’s unfair. You love shaved ice no matter the temperature outside, but Hendery purposely told Xiaojun that you didn’t want to come so they went ahead with just the two of them.

“Is that no fun Nora?” You heard Hendery from the background. Instantly, your lips perked up a smile.

“Put that dickhead on the phone, please.” You heard Xiaojun’s faint okay and passed the phone to Hendery.

“What do you want, no fun Nora? I’m eating shaved ice so make it quick.” He used the same line you told him earlier.

You’re on the verge of laughing but you kept it in, “Now you know what shaved ice is?!”

“Xiaojun corrected me. Because unlike you, no fun Nora, he’s a decent friend. He doesn’t like his friend, aka me, to look like an idiot.” You heard Xiaojun snort and say ‘debatable’ in the background.

“I told you I was studying! You know I have been stressing out with math since the beginning of time, so can you cut me some slack dickhead? That shaved ice would have been great to ease my stress.” You whined. He only laughed and gave the phone back to Xiaojun.

“Talk to you later y/n! We’re gonna go see Men in Black. Study well!” He ended the call leaving you in your deafening silenced room.

You inhaled sharply. How would you focus on your notes now that you could have been eating shaved ice and watching men in black with your best friends?

Your phone vibrated again and you lazily picked it up. It’s probably just Hendery shitting on your head again.

Hen 🐔: hey no fun nora Hen 🐔: im picking u up Hen 🐔: dress up now or fix ur face or whatever stiff u do Hen 🐔: stuff* Hen 🐔: i'm on my way now with ur shaved ice Hen 🐔: u like the fruity one right?? Hen 🐔: it’s not like i care Hen 🐔: if u don’t want this i'm still going to make u eat it Hen 🐔: also i took a cab so don’t be a jerk Hen 🐔: move fast or ill make u pay for everything

You stared at your phone with a lovesick smile painted on your face and a heart beating tirelessly in your chest.

Then you realized something, your smile faded and your eyes widened.

“Oh my god. I think I have a crush on Hendery.” You softly slapped your face and laughed. “Why him, no fun Nora?” You mumbled to yourself.

I can try to stop it, all I like Hands down I’ve lost this fight Thought I was strong enough for you But I just can’t hide the truth So, I guess I’m going down I guess I’m going down like this

For some reason, Hendery’s ‘friendliness’ made you fall in love with him and see him as more than just a friend. He would always tease you about literally everything, but he is also sweet and thoughtful.

Just like last time when you caught yourself with bad stomach flu and you kept using his bathroom while the three of you were studying at his house. He keeps spraying Lysol whenever you come out from the washroom and would follow you everywhere with it. But when he realizes that you’re not just constantly shitting and that you’re actually sick, he brought you to his bedroom and boiled you a ginger drink which tasted like death, and shoved bananas after bananas into your mouth. You weren’t sure if his home remedies helped, but you appreciate him calling his grandmother for help just so he could take care of you.

Hendery used to act like Xiaojun around you. He wanted to experience the friendship you had with Xiaojun and he did almost every single thing that the latter has done with you with a little bit of teasing and mockery.

All those things just so you could be his friend, and now that he already got that, he should stop trying to get your friendship right? But no. Something in him has this endless and tireless urge to win you over. And also no, this is not just becoming your friend anymore. It’s about being more than that.

Because when he watches you smile, he sees your pureness. When you laugh, he sees the beauty of your soul. When you talk, he sees how you view the world. And when you call his name, he sees his heart in your hand. No matter how hard he tries to shake this feeling off, he is all yours and he has no plans of taking it back.

He laid down on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Both of his hands are on his chest, feeling how it quickens when he thinks of you.

He whispered to himself and smiled, “Why her, dickhead?”

Hendery went into the classroom and scanned the whole place. Xiaojun wasn’t there yet and you were seated alone, busy with whatever you were scribbling on your notes. Hendery quietly sneaked to your back, he was about to scare you but he stopped mid-track when he saw you calculating love compatibility of your name and…

“What are you doing?” Xiaojun asked, making both of you and Hendery jump.

Hendery looked behind him “I-uhm.” He started then he switched his eyes to yours making your whole body turn cold.

“How long have you been behind me?” You asked, trying to sound collected, but you’re near passing out due to extreme nervousness. Did he see you matching your name with his?

Xiaojun walked to his seat passing Hendery who just remained standing there. He then looked at you just quietly sitting down. “What the hell is going on with the two of you?”

You looked at Hendery who’s also looking at you. You quickly averted your eyes and clutched your notebook to your chest. “Nothing. I was just…”

“I caught her doing some love voodoo in her notebook.” Hendery said that made your heart thump harder.

“Love… voodoo?” Xiaojun looked at you, his eyes asking you what the hell were you really doing.

You were about to answer when Hendery spoke first, “Yeah, I saw her name on it but I didn’t see whose unlucky name she wrote down there.”

You exhaled and rolled your eyes. Good. He didn’t see his name.

“Why are you being nosy? Leave me alone.” You said with newfound confidence.

“So you really are doing love voodoo?” Xiaojun asked, this conversation is starting to get weirder for him with every second that passes by.

“Yes,” Hendery said in a heartbeat.

“No!” You said and glared at Hendery. “I was just checking our… compatibility.” You shyly said, unable to keep eye contact.

Xiaojun laughed out loud, “Compatibility with who? Who’s the guy?!” He asked enthusiastically.

You glanced in Hendery’s direction, he’s wearing an unidentifiable look on his face, waiting for an answer. “No one special. It’s just-” You didn’t finish what you were going to say when your classmate, Lucas, walked past the three of you. He smiled at you when he caught your eye and you did the same.

Hendery and Xiaojun watched you and Lucas smile at each other and went silent for the longest couple of seconds in your life before Xiaojun broke the silence.

“It’s him, is it?! It’s Lucas?!” Xiaojun exclaimed in a hushed tone, shaking you by the shoulder. You looked at Hendery again, who is now wearing a frown on his face. You were going to say no, but your teacher just came in and everybody went to their seats. Hendery did not squeak another word in that class.

After that incident, Hendery paid more attention to you and how you’re acting around Lucas.

One afternoon, your class is in the gym and everyone is doing their own thing. Hendery was playing basketball with the other boys while you’re sitting down on one of the benches, watching them play.

For just a gym play, they were playing it seriously. You watch how Hendery attentively follows the ball and runs after it. When he finally got the chance to get the ball, he gave Lucas the best assist you have ever seen a high school student play. His team scored and you screamed on top of your lungs to cheer for him.

Everyone in the gym looked at you. Some gave you a ‘what the fuck’ look, Xiaojun is dying in laughter, Hendery looks like he’s disappointed in you and only Lucas is smiling at you genuinely.

“Thanks, Y/n!” Lucas yelled across the gym.

You couldn’t say you’re not cheering for him, but you also don’t want them to find out that you were screaming for Hendery. In the end, you gave him a shy smile and waved to dismiss his thanks and went back to your seat, feeling embarrassed.

Hendery saw enough ‘evidence’ to confirm to himself that you like Lucas and it was indeed his name that you wrote down in your notebook together with your name. He saw how you would always smile at Lucas whenever he’s near and how he casually asks you to meet him in the library and you never hesitate to say yes.

“…I mean it’s understandable that she likes Lucas. Who wouldn’t? Right?” Hendery rambled to Xiaojun.

Xiaojun remained quiet but his mouth was wide open. He blinked a few times before gaining focus to speak again, “Wow… You like y/n.”

Hendery groaned. “I said a lot of shit and that’s all you heard?”

“I have to sink that in! Since when? I never noticed. You’re really good at hiding your feelings, all you did was piss her off.” Xiaojun snorted.

“I don’t know when exactly, but I think I have always liked her. And I wasn’t trying to hide my feelings, that was me showing her that I like her. You two are just too dumb to notice.”

“No, Hendery. Your way of showing is just unusual. But if it really bothers you, why won’t you just confess? You’re not friends with her that long yet. Think of it as just a few months to lose, right?” Xiaojun jokes. “Oh wait let me grab some of that milkshake.” He got up and went to buy himself a drink, leaving Hendery alone with his thoughts.

It was the only joke that went over Hendery’s head. He mistakenly thought of it as advice, a piece of wise advice that he should do.

“Right. Just a few months to lose.” He mumbled to himself, deep in his thoughts.

It was valentine's day and your last class for the day just ended. Hendery did not come to school so it was just you and Xiaojun the whole day. It felt wrong that Hendery wasn’t anywhere near you and you were so bummed out because of it.

“Did you get Hendery’s text?” You asked Xiaojun as soon as you left your classroom.

“What text? He never texts me unless he needs to copy my assignments.” He answered, fixing the straps of his backpack on his shoulders.

“Hendery sent me this cryptic text. He wanted me to meet him on the roof?” You said the last part in confusion, knitting your brows.

“He’s telling you to meet him on the roof. It’s very literal Y/n, that’s not cryptic at all. Weird? Yes. Cryptic? No.” He said. “But why would he want you to meet him on the roof?”

“Right?! It’s weird! But no, that’s exactly why I found his text cryptic. He was never straightforward with me. There has to be a catch here somewhere.” You said and read his text again hoping to see something between the lines.

“Just meet him and see what he’s up to for Pete's sake.”

“Come with me. I’m scared.” You said and tugged on his arm.

“What the fuck do you mean you’re scared?” Xiaojun laughed.

“I don’t know. He might push me off the roof or something. You know how complicated that guy’s brain is.” Xiaojun only sighed and went with you.

The moment you got to the roof, you immediately yelled for Hendery, both of you and Xiaojun were gasping for air. “Dickhead, why would you choose the roof to meet me you dipshit! I can’t breathe!”

You scanned the area and there’s no Hendery insight. “There’s no one here Xiaojun!”

“Y/N.” A man said behind you.

You turned around and your eyes widened at the sight of a box of chocolates and a bouquet of flowers. You looked up to see who was holding them.

“Lucas…” You mumbled before hesitantly taking it from him and staring at them. “These are beautiful but what are these for?”

Lucas smiled shyly and rubbed his nape before taking out a piece of paper from his pocket. He unfolded it carefully and stole a glance at you before reading it with a smile.

“Y/n, the first time I met you, you weren't really eye-catching. You were frowning on the first day of school and couldn’t even be bothered.”

Your smile faded slowly. Wait, what?

“Your laugh sounds like a neigh. You walk like you’re going to attack somebody. When I look into your eyes I could see sleep crusts on the corners of your eyes. And your smiles are lopsided.”

You frowned. Why would he give someone chocolate and flowers if he’s just going to insult you? And where the hell are your friends?

“I don’t appreci-”

He cuts you off, “But, it was your personality that caught me. You said a single word and I’m instantly hooked. Your frown makes me want to make your day better, it makes me do everything I can just to turn that into a smile.”

You just stared at Lucas. Absorbing every word he reads.

“Your laughter may sound like a neigh but it’s the most satisfying sound I’ve ever heard in my life, I don’t think I could ever get through the day without hearing them. You may walk like an arrogant guy in the gym, but it makes my world stop spinning and my heart beats wildly. Your eyes may still have eye gunk in the middle of the day, but it’s the only eyes that I always get lost in. And your sarcastic looking smiles… they take my breath away.”

The letter doesn’t sound like Lucas at all. It sounds like someone else’s words. Someone you know very well…

Lucas refolded the paper and smiled at you before pointing to your back. “He has something else to say.”

You looked behind you and there he was. The person you’re thinking of while listening to Lucas.

“I was never in denial. Accepting what I feel for you wasn't difficult to do. I woke up one morning with you in my mind and a heart full of love all just for you. My whole world shifted and you are at the center of it. My feelings for you scared me for a brief moment that I might lose you as my friend if I tell you about it, but I know whatever happens after this, I will always be the dickhead that pisses you off every day.” He stopped and smiled for a second, “I like you Y/n.”

You could feel your heart bouncing in joy. Hendery likes you. He likes you. No matter how hard you look in his eyes, there is only honesty that you can see.

It’s the feeling of butterflies in your tummy that shuts you up. You wanted to say it back, you wanted to be his. But you’re just a bunch of high school students. You know you’re not ready for this. You have a whole lot more important things to think of than having a boyfriend this young.

“Hendery… I don’t know what to say. I am flattered, very flattered. In fact, I like you too. But I am not ready fo-“

He shushed you and raised his hand to make you stop talking, “In fact what?!” He exclaimed.

You could feel your right eye twitch. God how much you hate getting shushed. You rolled your eyes and inhaled, calming yourself down.

“I like you too. Don’t act like you don’t know. Isn’t that the reason why you’re doing this… whatever this is? As I was saying, I’m not yet ready to-”

“Wait, no, I didn’t know you like-“

“I’M NOT READY TO HAVE A BOYFRIEND YET!” You screamed with your eyes closed. “There I said it. You can’t let me finish, can you?”

Hendery smiled so wide it made your heart jump. He took your hand and squeezed it. “It’s okay. I am not forcing you into anything nor asking you for something in return. I can and will wait for you, just know that we’re not rushing. Take your time because we have a lot to spare.”

“Thank you, Hendery.” You smiled. You heard Xiaojun and Lucas clapping and cheering behind you. “Can I also add how annoying your letter is and why the hell did you involve Lucas in this?” You asked, making them laugh.

“So that if you rejected me, we’d both get disappointed. You, thinking that your crush is the one confessing to you and me getting rejected by you.”

“What? That’s ridiculous! Pfft. I don’t even like Lucas!” You realized how that sounded and also that Lucas is just right there in front of you, “…like that. I don’t like Lucas like that, he is very likeable but I don’t see him that way.”

“Hendery thought you like Lucas because you’re always with him these days, you were his cheerleader and he caught you doing love voodoo on him.” Hendery attempted to kick Xiaojun but luckily for him, he missed.

“I was with Lucas these days because I was assigned to tutor him. He was failing his classes miserably and they’re going to kick him off the basketball team if he doesn't make changes in his grades.” Your eyes met Lucas’ shocked expression then you realized “That’s supposed to be a secret and I am so sorry Lucas but I can swear to you that no one will know about this other than the four of us.”

“Hmm. You’re not sure about that.” Hendery mumbled.

“How about you becoming his personal cheerleader?” Xiaojun interrogated.

“I was cheering for this dickhead right here okay?! He assisted and it was honestly the only reason why Lucas scored.” You heard Lucas gasp beside you, “Which again I am sorry to say Lucas but that’s the truth.”

“Why am I even here just to get treated like this.” He mumbled to himself and everybody heard it, making all of you laugh. Xiaojun tried his best to put his arms around Lucas’ shoulder despite their height difference.

“And how are you going to explain the love voodoo? Hendery saw you wrote down Lucas’ name with yours.” Xiaojun added.

“He didn’t see shit!” You yelled and hastily pulled your backpack to your front and opened it to take out the same notebook in question. “Look who's name is written here!” You showed them the page where Hendery’s name is written just above yours.

Lucas and Xiaojun are intently looking at it, meanwhile, Hendery just took a glance at it and smiled at you.

“What did our compatibility say?”

“Frenemies.” You grinned and he playfully slapped your arm.

And I love it that she’s honest You don’t find it nowadays She’s not even drop dead gorgeous But she kills me anyways, oh

The sudden slamming of Hendery’s chopsticks on the table made all of you jolt on your seats.

“What the hell man.” Lucas complained with a mouthful of stir-fried rice then went back on eating his lunch.

Hendery looked around the school cafeteria and wore a grimace on his face. This is probably the most disgusted expression you’ve ever seen him wear. You watched his expression then followed his stare, trying to find what was making him react like this.

But there’s nothing much, just the usual valentines day decorations all around the university.

He looked at Xiaojun who was sitting right in front of him, eating cup noodles with pringles, and when he called it ‘taco noodle’ Hendery winced harder.

Xiaojun laughed at his facial expressions, “What the hell is wrong with you?”

He sighed and gripped his hair. “I fucking hate valentines day.” He muttered.

Lucas looked at him offended, “What do you mean? You love Valentine's day! You made me confess your love to Y/N in 7th grade on Valentine's day.”

Xiaojun snorted, “Oh, I remember now! That’s how you became our friend! I keep wondering when did we ever invite you to join us.”

The latter nonchalantly shrugged and ate another spoonful of his food, “I sat beside you guys the next day and just like that, I’m in. I don’t need to do all the sort of shit Hendery did. The three of you badly needed a good-looking lad in your group and I was the missing piece.”

Hendery didn’t answer and just kept the face he made, looking at everything with judgment in his eyes like he didn’t hear Lucas trash talk him. This isn’t his usual self, he would be the one making fun of the group, but he seems like he’s in too deep of thought to notice anything around himself.

“Are you okay Dery?” You finally spoke. Xiaojun and Lucas stopped bickering and also looked at him, waiting for an answer.

Hendery snapped his head towards you and stared at your face in the longest minute you’ve had in your life. You could almost see the gears in his brain working. He blinked a couple of times and smiled.

“Yeah! I am now because of you. Thank you for asking.” He scratched his head and looked at the table. “What was I doing again?”

Xiaojun pinched his arm to wake him up, “Eating. Dumbass. What’s wrong with you?”

Hendery only chuckled and shook his head. He picked up his chopsticks and played with his food with them.

“Did you know that he forgot we already had our eyes checked last week? I found out about it when I suddenly received an email from our optometrist asking me if there’s something wrong with our glasses because apparently this guy right here booked us for another eye check-up the next day. Who forgets that?” Xiaojun said.

Hendery laughed out loud, throwing his head back. “Senior year of college is eating me alive. Don’t judge.”

The three of you stared at him quietly, judgment could be felt in your stares. The air was extremely awkward before Xiaojun broke it.

“Okay?” He said wincing before moving his attention to you, “And what are you up to today little missy?” He asked you out of nowhere.

You couldn’t help but laugh, “That’s very random. But I think I’ll just stay at home as much as I want to go on a date.”

Lucas hollered and whistled, “Hendery, my man! That’s your cue!” Everybody at the table laughed.

“She isn’t that lucky.” He scoffed and looked at you, “Make me your boyfriend, and only then I’ll take you on a date.”

“I don’t know. You look like you’re not mature enough yet.” You teased him and he only laughed.

“I have been waiting for eight years and she keeps on turning me down. She’s not even drop-dead gorgeous.” A series of ‘ooh damn’ was heard from Xiaojun and Lucas, but you kept your eyes on each other.

“I never asked for you to wait. Also, you’re not very attractive either. You look like you haven’t been through puberty yet.” You said and poked your tongue out.

Hendery laughed and smiled like a lovesick puppy. “That’s exactly the reason why I fell in love with you. Date me, Senpai.”

Your eyes tell him the same and you could see the understanding in his. “Hmm. No.” You answered, keeping your mischievous smile.

He shrugged with a grin and leaned back on his chair, “Then don’t.”

I can try to stop it, all I like Hands down I’ve lost this fight Thought I was strong enough for you But I just can’t hide the truth

It has been a week since exams week passed. The four of you would always go out for lunch and window shop in different malls to loosen up the stress that studying has brought you. But it has been a week and you did none of those yet.

Despite being savage to each other, the three of you refused to go out without Hendery. For some reason, Hendery has been acting a little strange. He’s always not in the mood and would always cancel plans. He’d stay in his dorm and would not go out for days.

At first, it wasn’t really a big deal and all of you thought that he was just under the weather exactly like what he said. But after days of giving the same excuse, the three of you decided to find out what is happening to him.

Xiaojun, Lucas and you are seated in the living room of your dorm, waiting for Hendery to answer your facetime call.

“Why is he not answering his phone? And it’s you calling. Should I call the police?” Xiaojun asked, making Lucas laugh worriedly.

“Should we actually though?” Lucas looked at you, genuinely asking you with concern in his tone.

Your heart fell to the ground just thinking about it. “Shut the fuck up. Both of you just shut up.” You hissed at them and they went quiet.

The call was left unanswered, so you called him again. After three rings, the facetime call was finally answered. The room was very dark, you could barely see him on the screen.

“Hello?” His voice was hoarse, he sounded like he just woke up. You could feel your chest loosened with relief.

“Hey, man. Where are you at?” You still asked nevertheless knowing all too well that he’s in his dorm, laying on his bed.

Hendery let out a low chuckle, “I’m in my room, man. What makes you call me, man?” He emphasized the word ‘man’ every time he gets to use it just to piss you off.

After all these days of dealing with a quiet Hendery, you’re just glad that he’s mocking you again today. God, how much you missed this. Maybe he’s just really feeling sick.

“We’re at Y/n’s dorm! We’re going out later, want to join?” Xiaojun asked. You stared at the dark screen of your phone waiting for a reply.

You don’t have to see him to know that he’s thinking about it. Why’s he thinking about it? He would always just say yes to everything, especially to you.

“We’re going out for billiards.” You added. You heard Lucas whisper ‘we are?’ but you didn’t pay attention. You know how much Hendery loves billiards. You hoped that would get him excited if hanging out with you doesn’t excite him anymore.

Hendery cleared his throat before speaking, “I think I’m going to pass today. I’m sorry guys.” His voice tells you he is indeed sorry for bailing on you.

“Why? What is it this time?” On the other hand, Xiaojun’s voice is clearly pissed. “You’re always unavailable. We haven’t seen you in a week! The sem’s break is almost over and we haven’t hung out yet. Not even once!”

You tried grabbing Xiaojun’s arm to make him stop. Something tells you that there is something Hendery wasn’t telling any of you.

“I’m just not feeling well, Xiaojun. Can you try to understand that? Can you?” Hendery is quickly losing his temper, but he didn’t want to add fuel to the fire so he tried his best not to start an argument.

“Whatever.” Xiaojun sighed and left the living room to get himself a glass of water.

Hendery let out a deep breath on the other line “I’m going to rest now Y/n. Goodbye.” And he ended the call just like that.

“What the hell?” Lucas said. “That’s you, taking him out to billiards. That should be the happiest day of his life.”

He’s right. Lucas voiced your thoughts. You bit your lip and you had your right leg jumping up and down. Something’s not right at all.

Without a word, you ran to your room to get your purse and keys. As you were heading to the door, you ran past Xiaojun coming out from the kitchen.

“Where are you going?!” He asked.

“I’m going to see Hendery! Something’s not right!” You screamed right before you closed the door.

You received a series of texts from Lucas asking you what on earth are they going to do at your dorm. You threw your phone on the passenger’s seat where your purse was and buckled your seatbelt before driving to Hendery’s place.

His place is only 10 minutes away and you got there in no time. The elevator requires you to use some techy key so you decided to run 7 flights of stairs instead. You were out of breath when you got there and you knocked so loud the neighbours surely heard it.

Hendery on the other side of the door jolted up from the loud banging. He thought it was the police so he half-ran to the door to open only to see you gasping for air.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” He asked but he stepped aside to let you in.

You waved your hand to greet him and went inside. Cans of pop are piled up on the kitchen table, plastic wraps of various candies are all over the floor. The sink is filled with dirty dishes, there is dirty laundry everywhere. His whole dorm is a mess and it reeks. You went straight to the window to let out some air.

“What the hell is going on here?” You asked as you instinctively tidy the place up.

“Just leave it there Y/n.”

“No, Dery. Your dorm is so freaking messy!”

Hendery follows you everywhere and takes everything you hand him with a frown on his face. And when you handed him his dirty boxer shorts, that’s when he dropped everything he’s holding and walked back to his room.

You followed his figure disappear into his bedroom. You sighed. Did you step over the line? Maybe you shouldn’t have overdone your welcome. You went to his bedroom and gently knocked on the door before slowly pushing the door open.

He’s laying on his bed, his back facing you. His room is so dark but you could still see the mess scattered everywhere. You ignored them for now and walked to his bed. You sat down on the edge and poked his body.

“I’m sorry.” You said.

He remained facing the wall for a second before sighing. His stiff shoulder visibly relaxed, he sat up and faced you. “No. I am sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

You touched his hand with the tips of your fingers. “No. You have every right to get annoyed. I’m just worried about you. You’re not being your usual self, you’re always hiding here in your room, you barely hang out with us anymore. What’s wrong, Dery? You know you can talk to me right?”

He looked down at your hand and played with your fingers, “I feel overwhelmed. I don’t think I could finish college anymore. My parents have been sending me money to study, but I don’t think I am worth all that hard work and money. I can’t even pass a very simple quiz. I always feel tired, I just want to… rest. You know?” He confessed.

You cannot help but worry. You saw the changes in Hendery’s behaviour, but hearing it directly from him scared you. There are unspeakable things that are running in your head that you wished to happen to no one. You were alarmed by how he thinks and sees himself that it left you speechless for a couple of seconds. The Hendery right in front of you looked so fragile and vulnerable, and your heart breaks for him.

“Dery…” You called out his name. He looked up and met your eyes. He gave you a sad smile.

“I’m sorry if I burdened you with my problems. You don’t have to worry about it, that’s just me making everything dramatic and complicated.” He chuckled.

You took his hand between your palms and held it tightly. “Don’t dismiss your feelings that quickly, Hendery. I don’t mind listening to you and helping you out with your problem. I am actually glad that you are talking about it, and can you not think that you’re a burden to me? Because you will never be that. And your feelings… they’re valid. Everyone has their low points, it might be sad to say but it’s normal. You can’t always be happy, there will come a time when you will feel the need to rest and you should. Rest your heart, your mind, your soul. Just know that you should never go through this low point alone. We’re here for you, I am here for you. Always.”

“Always?” He asked.

“Yes. Always.” You replied. Hendery wiped his eyes with his hand while the other was gripping your hand tightly.

He cannot express in words how thankful he was to have this conversation with you. It definitely lifted some weight from him. “Thank you.” He said and forced a smile.

His current state right in front of you broke your heart into shreds that made you tear up. You chuckled while holding back your tears. “Did you know that I love you?” You asked.

He looked into your eyes and nodded with a smile on his face. “I felt it.”

You gave back the smile, “Why didn’t you say anything about it?”

Hendery shrugged, “Because I love you. I love you enough to give you all the time you need in this world. And didn’t I tell you that I am not asking for anything in return? I just love you and it’s enough for me to feel that you love me just as much.”

“Do you also love me enough to get professional help?”

His smile faded, “What do you mean professional help?”

“I am asking you to see a shrink, Dery. They can help you cope with whatever you’re going throu-”

“Why can’t you help me instead? I thought you were always going to be with me? Why are you sending me to see a shrink?”

You sighed, “Dery, this is the best way I know how to help you. You need help and professionals could help you the best. I will still be here for you, I will even go with you to the therapy if I have to. I will never leave you alone, but let’s ask for help from someone that could actually help you. Hmm? Please?” You convinced him.

His frown disappeared. “Okay. But just because you said please.” He replied that it made you smile.

“Thank you. It’s for your own good.” You said.

“I know.” He gave you a genuine smile and kissed your knuckles. “Thank you.”

Hendery disappeared.

He stopped coming to school, he never replied to any of your texts, his phone is disconnected, he deleted every single social media he owns and now that the three of you tried visiting him after he missed school for a few days, you were all surprised that his apartment was left unlocked and empty, all three of you tried going to his parent’s house, but no one’s there.

He just left.

The last thing you heard from him was his appointment with the psychiatrist. You texted him multiple times asking how the meeting went, but he never texted back. You tried calling him but his phone was turned off. You thought he was just asleep and forgot to charge his phone so you tried calling him the next morning only to find out that his phone was cut off.

“Can you try calling him again?” Lucas suggested. You and your friends are in Hendery’s empty dorm.

“Did you think I haven’t tried that already?!” You hissed at him.

“Calm down Y/N. Your temper won’t be of any help. Control it.” Xiaojun warned you.

“I’m sorry, Lucas. I don’t mean to lash out at you. I am just feeling frustrated.” You are. The frustration in your chest is building up and you hate every second that passes by without knowing what the hell has happened to Hendery.

Lucas smiled timidly, “No, I get it. I’m sorry if I’m a little annoying, I’m worried too.”

“We all are.” Xiaojun said and tapped his shoulder.

You held your phone in tightly and stared at his contact number. Taking a very deep sigh, you wondered to yourself.

Where are you, Hendery?

I guess I’m going down I guess I’m going down I guess I’m going down like this

It has been a month since Hendery’s sudden disappearance. Every day, all of you wondered what had happened to him. You tried contacting his family, but nobody answered your calls. You wanted to look for him everywhere, but all of this happened during the busiest month in school and you have to prioritize your studies first.

Heaven knows how much you wanted to drop everything to look for Hendery, but you also thought of your friends. They wanted to look for him too and you just can’t ditch them and look for him by yourself.

“Okay, is everything ready?” Lucas asked and strapped his seatbelt on. Xiaojun beside him nodded and you answered yes.

“I still don’t understand why you guys won’t let me drive my car.” You said as you try to untangle the wires of your earphones.

Xiaojun sighed. “Y/N, we already talked about this. You were so unfocused these weeks and this is a 6-hour-drive to Hendery’s hometown. We need to get there alive so just sit back and let it go. Lucas is driving and that’s it.”

Hendery’s hometown is the last thing the three of you haven’t checked yet. Back when you were in high school, his family brought you, Lucas and Xiaojun there for a weekend trip, and that is the last place you can search for him. Heck, all of you would never leave a single rock unturned until you find him. 8 years of friendship will not end like this.

Lucas chuckled and put his hand behind Xiaojun’s headrest and backed up out of your apartment’s driveway. “I am really going to smack that guy’s head so hard he’d regret having a head.”

You smiled at what he said, “Do you think Hendery will be there? What if he’s not there either? What if his family moved out of their house? What if we run out of places to look for him? What if we don’t find him?” Every question you’ve spoken placed a heavy weight on your chest.

Xiaojun and Lucas were silent for a second. “He will be there Y/N. I just know that he’s just back home chilling. So, don’t worry too much.” Lucas assured you and gave you a wink through the rearview mirror.

You were very quiet throughout the ride and so are the other two. Only the radio can be heard through the thick air. No one might be talking, but all three of you could hear each other’s thoughts loud and clear. The closer you get to Hendery’s hometown, the heavier your heart feels. None of you know what awaits there, there could be nothing, good news or a bad one. But all you could think of is how much you miss him, and if he’s not back home, you wanted to know if he’s doing fine in the very least.

“Y/N? We’re here.” Xiaojun gently tapped your knees from the passenger seat to wake you up.

“How long was I sleeping?” You quickly sat straight and looked around, it was still bright outside but the sun is setting soon.

“Doesn’t matter. Let’s go and see that dickhead. Did you practice all the swear words you wrote down for him?” He joked to lessen the worry you’re feeling and you’re thankful for it.

“Oh yeah. I’ll make sure his ear will fall off.” You answered before opening the car door.

Lucas knocked on the front door and heard a voice yelling to wait a second from the other side. At this point, you were so glad that at least you could talk to someone who might know where Hendery is.

The door was opened by Hendery’s mom and your heart just swelled with relief. The moment she saw the three of you, her shoulders dropped and smiled. She opened her arms and offered all of you a hug. “It’s been a long time, my kids. What were you guys up to?” She asked as she let you enter.

“Uhm-beside school, we were just trying to look for Hendery this past month. Do you mind telling us where he is?” Lucas asked, cutting through the chase.

Hendery’s mom smiled sadly. “I was hoping to chat with you guys for a little while before addressing the elephant in the room.” She kids and looked at you with tears in her eyes. “First, everyone in our family wanted to thank you for pushing my son to visit the psychiatrist.”

Your heart is in your throat. “Wait, I’m sorry. Did something happen to him?” You clutched your chest and tears are starting to pool around your eyes.

She broke down into tears. Hendery is so much like his mother, a happy person that never showed any sadness, and to see her crying helplessly in front of the three of you made your heart sink down to your feet. Xiaojun held onto you as he lost his balance, and Lucas just stood there confused and speechless like you.

“W-what happened? Is… Is he h-here? W-where is he?” Xiaojun asked, you could feel his heartbreak.

She chuckled and wiped her eyes. “Oh god, I’m so sorry.” She apologized and combed her hair with both of her hands. “Hendery’s at the hospital right now and get the help he needed. The reason why I was thanking you Y/n is that he is sick and it was caught early because of you.”

“I don’t understand. If it’s something about his mental health why would he need to stay in the hospital? Did he h-hurt himself?” You asked.

“No, love. He would never do that, he promised us that.” She assured you and held your hand. “There is no diagnosis yet, but the prognosis was Huntington's disease. He was tested last week and is now under observation until the result comes back”

Your world stopped spinning. He has what?

“I-I’m sorry can you please explain what’s that?” Xiaojun asked.

She smiled sadly, “It’s a brain disorder that he inherited from either me or his father. It affects his motor movements- sudden movements that he couldn’t control, relapses in his memory, mood changes, anxiety, depression, anger and irritability. Small things that could be overlooked if someone’s not paying enough attention.”

“How are they going to treat him?” Lucas asked. The three of you looked intently as she took longer to answer.

“They can’t. There is no cure for what he possibly has.”

The three of you walked down the hospital aisle with a heavy heart, but his mother asked all of you to try to stay positive around him. Lucas knocked on the door before opening it. Hendery’s eyes widened as he saw the three of you entering his room.

“W-what… H-how?” He asked.

You stared at him and noticed that he lost a lot of weight. You could see the bones in his upper chest and how his cheeks look sunken. There are needles sticking in his hand and the hospital gown just looked too big on him. You could physically feel your chest tighten at the sight of him.

“We looked everywhere for you dickhead.” You said. You tried keeping it positive but you couldn’t help but cry.

You felt the sense of relief that at least he is alive, but your heart is in pain seeing him like this and offended that he chose to hide his condition from all of you.

I can try to stop it, all I like Hands down I’ve lost this fight Though I was strong enough for you But I just can’t hide the truth

He didn’t want you. You wanted to stay with him and take care of him but he didn’t want you.

“Why are you so freaking stubborn, Hendery?” You asked him, putting the bowl of porridge on the table after a failed attempt of feeding him.

“Because first, I can feed myself just fine, thank you. Second, can you power puff girls just drive back to the city and go back to school? Like you guys have been here for a week already. You’ve been missing a lot.” He said and took the bowl of porridge from the table to feed himself.

“I can’t. Bubbles is driving and he won’t go home till tomorrow.” Xiaojun said, making him laugh.

“Do you think I could drive back home now that I looked up online that Huntington's Disease only gives you a maximum of 10 years to live?” Lucas said without putting much thought into it.

The whole room went quiet. The possible truth of what he said is a slap on everyone’s faces.

Hendery chuckled awkwardly to break the silence, “Well, ten years is a long time right? A lot could happen.”

You just stared at his face with seriousness.

“Be my boyfriend.” You blurted. Everyone looked at you with a surprised look.

Hendery just shook his head and laughed, “I appreciate the offer, but no, thank you.”

“Why? You said you love me right? And you know that I love you too. Be my boyfriend.”

Xiaojun and Lucas were just sitting there, listening to your conversation in disbelief. For eight years, it was always Hendery asking you this exact question. Your boldness and certainty in your decision made them stare at you in amusement.

“I don’t need pity love.” Hendery mumbled, looking down at his hand.

You were very offended but you tried to understand his situation. It’s not Hendery, it was his brain disorder speaking.

“We talked about this before you ditched us. I told you I love you and you said you knew. Don’t you remember that?” You asked calmly.

“I do. I am really happy that you’re asking me that. I used to dream of it and now that it’s actually happening in real life, I might twerk here in front of you if I’m not bedridden.” He looked up and stared at the window.

“Then why? Make me understand. You love me, I love you. You have been waiting for eight years, now I’m ready and you’re turning me down?” You asked, voice sounding a little offensive.

Hendery frowned. “Because why the hell would you waste your time with me?!” He raised his voice. You’re graduating soon, you should go back to school and get that degree but look at what you’re doing!” He looked at you and also pointed at Xiaojun and Lucas, “Look at all of you, skipping school just to sit here!”

“Fine. Xiaojun, Lucas? Go home. I’ll text you updates every hour.” You told them and looked back to face Hendery. “Now, can you be my boyfriend?”

Hendery is starting to get annoyed, “Going back to school also applies to you, Y/n.” He said in all seriousness.

“No.” You stubbornly said. Which pissed Hendery off but felt endeared at the same time.

“Then I’ll have to shun you.” He said before turning the television on and turning the volume up.

“Have it your way, you’re never going to get rid of me.” You said and sat down beside his bed to watch TV with him.

Xiaojun and Lucas eventually went back to the city the next day while you asked to stay behind. You called your parents to tell them that you’re not going back just yet and told them not to worry. They understand the situation and bid their regards to Hendery.

Hendery on the other hand was even more pissed that you really did not go back to university. He tries his best to ignore your presence but is very attentive whenever you move around. He listened to your conversation with Lucas and Xiaojun, he listened to you asking them for a copy of the lesson they had that day. Whenever you fall asleep, he’d just stare at your face as if it would be his last time seeing it.

This went on for two more weeks. He only started talking to you again when you suddenly stopped being on your laptop all day and stopped asking your friends about school. He had suspicions, but he wouldn’t be able to confirm it if he wouldn’t ask you.

“What did you do, Y/N?” He asked as you went back to his room with a cup of coffee in your hand.

You smiled at him and pulled a chair closer to his bed, “Are we in speaking terms now?” You asked, wiggling your eyebrows.

“I asked you, what did you do? Why aren’t you on your laptop studying?” He asked.

You sighed before speaking, “I dropped out.”

“You what?!” He asked, sitting right up. His sudden movement made him dizzy but he did not take his eyes away from you.

“I want to focus on taking care of you. It’s my decision and I already told my parents about it. I will return back to school next year and there's only one semester left anyway.” You explained.

“Exactly! One semester left and you chose to drop out!” Hendery yelled.

“Hendery, I don’t want you to live here alone okay?” You said, tears starting to pool around your eyes. “I love you and can you please stop pushing me away? I am here because I want to and because I love you.” You’re sobbing and Hendery doesn’t know what to do.

Hendery tried to reach your back and rub it, “Shh. Don’t cry. I’m sorry, I just don’t want you to give up something important.”

You swat his hand away and wipe the tears on your eyes aggressively, “Oh shut up! You have no idea what’s important to me so can you just stop making me do something I don’t want to do?! I don’t want to go back to college while you’re here laying in bed because you couldn’t stand up anymore! I am scared to leave you here and risk you not remembering me when I come back! You couldn’t even drink water on your own now because you can’t lift the damn pitcher of water! You might have this brain disorder that will kill you in a decade or two but all you fucking talk about is me going back to school!”

Hendery listened to you while looking down at his hand, fingers fiddling with each other. Tears are gushing down his cheeks and he attempts to wipe them every time they fall. “I’m sorry.” He mumbled.

“Eight years ago, you told me we have a lot of time to spare but that’s not the case anymore, Hendery.” You said calmly, but tears are still running down your face. “Don’t you know how much I regret not saying yes to you every time you ask me to be your girlfriend? On how much time I take for myself just because I wasn’t ready to date yet? You gave me eight years' worth of time, can you just let me give you mine?” You asked, sobbing your heart out.

He looked up to you, crying harder than you do. He opened his mouth to speak but his sobs stopped him from doing so. You couldn’t help but laugh at the ugly crying face he’s making, and the sound of your laugh makes him laugh too.

“Asshole.” He managed to say. Making both of you cry and laugh at the same time.

Both of you took a couple of minutes to die down your laughter and calm down your emotions.

“So, are you still going to push me away or you’re going to make me stay?” You asked him.

He smiled but with a pout on his face. “Stay.” He said and opened his arms to invite you into a hug. “I just wished you asked me to date you when I was still handsome.”

You crept into his arms and buried your face on his chest, you could feel his bones but you don’t care. “Don’t worry about it, you were never handsome anyways.”

A few days later, Hendery was told that the result of his test came back. The doctor asked for the family to be in the room. His mom and his dad were standing side by side and you were sitting on his bed, holding his hand and rubbing it with your thumb.

The doctor came in with an envelope with a face that you could almost read. “I regret to inform you that the test came back positive. The samples were taken from you, Hendery, showed that you indeed have Huntington’s Disease.” The doctor went on with his medical explanations but Hendery kept his stare onto you.

His grip on your hand tightened, making you look at him with a sad smile. “We thought you only had 10 years left but the doctor said you have 15 to 20 years. You really are the devil, are you?” You asked him, making everyone laugh and sniff at the same time.

Hendery rested his head on your shoulder and closed his eyes as he memorized your scent, “I’m officially dying.” He mumbled, sounding almost like a warning.

You put your palm on top of his cheek and kissed the top of his head.

“I know, and I don’t care.”

16 years later

“Jie!” You yelled by the stairs, looking up to the second floor.

“Yes, mom?!” A voice of a young boy yelled back.

“Did you help your brother get ready?!” You asked and kept your stare on the wall.

“Lei’s almost done! He’s just practicing putting his own pants on!” Jie answered and you heard both of your sons giggle upstairs. You smiled to yourself and went back to the kitchen to finish the rice roll you were making.

“They yell too much, don’t they?” Xiaojun asked Lucas who was both sitting and waiting in the living room of your house.

“Not that much!” Lucas replied in his usual loud voice, making Xiaojun wonder why the hell did he ask Lucas in the first place.

Just a little later two sets of feet ran down the stairs.

“Careful young ones. You don’t want to trip and hurt yourselves.” Xiaojun reminded them before getting up from his seat and squatting in front of Lei to fix the zipper of his pants.

“Thank you, uncle Xiaojun.” The 5-year-old said. Xiaojun just smiled at him and gently tapped the young boy’s shoulder before standing up.

Lucas walked to them with a small box wrapped in gift paper. He handed it to the older boy and greeted him, “Happy 9th birthday, Jie. You’ve grown up to be a very good boy so you deserve a gift.”

Jie quickly tore the wrapping apart and the brothers gasped at the sight of a remote control car. “Thank you, uncle! You’re the best!” The young boy said and hugged Lucas.

“Your uncle Xiaojun and I shared to buy you that gift so you have to share that toy with Lei too, okay?”

The boy nodded with a grin on his face and immediately showed the toy to his brother who is also wearing a bright smile.

You came out from the kitchen with a thermos bag. Jie also showed his toy to you and you asked your eldest if he said his thanks already, to which he proudly admitted yes.

“Good job.” You praised your eldest. You sighed and looked at everyone before asking with a smile, “Are we all ready?”

Everyone nodded and went to your minivan. Lucas was the one in the driver’s seat and Xiaojun was seated next to him in the passenger’s seat, while you and your children were seated at the back.

The drive was quiet, only the music and the boys’ laughs could be heard. There’s something thick in your throat that is choking you, but you held it back.

The car stopped at a very peaceful place. Your children went down the car and asked for your permission to play with their toy on the wide ground.

“Just don’t go too far, okay? Stay near.” You reminded them and they both said yes in a chorus before running to the tree nearby.

You watched them play with the toy car your best friends bought them with a sad smile on your face when you felt a warm hand rested on your back. You looked beside you and saw Lucas sharing the same smile, beside him was Xiaojun also wearing a similar expression.

“Let’s go?” Lucas asked you softly. You nodded and turned your back before walking to the nearby headstone that reads “Huang Guanheng. A loving father, faithful husband and a good friend.”

It hurts. It still hurts. But you smiled. “Hey, dickhead. How’re seven feet below the ground treating you?” You asked, making both of your friends laugh, but your voice cracked along the line. “It’s our eldest 9th birthday today. It’s also his first birthday without you.” You sniffed.

“He said he misses you this morning. I told him that I miss you too. I miss you so much.” You cried, and you heard your friends cry with you. “But I am making it. I can make it because you gave me enough time to prepare myself for this and more than enough happy memories in a lifetime to keep me moving. You gave me two beautiful sons, who by the way look like you.” Xiaojun laughed beside you and mumbled ‘unlucky kids’ later on the three of you are laughing altogether.

Xiaojun puts his arms around your waist and Lucas puts his around your neck. The three of you stared at his headstone for a while before one of you asked to leave. You told them to go ahead first, that you will be with them in a minute.

You squatted down in front of your husband’s headstone and gently caressed the engraved name.

“We’re leaving now. Your sons wanted to get snow with chocolate syrup.” You smiled at the memory. “I just hope you’re happy wherever you are Hendery, don't worry about me and the kids. We’ll be okay.” You shut your eyes closed and composed yourself, trying to hold back your tears before speaking again. “Rest well, my love.”

I can try to stop it, all I like Hands down I’ve lost this fight And I thought that I was strong enough for you But I just can’t hide the truth So I guess I’m going down like this

A/N: Re-uploaded just as promised! I also changed the header picture of this story and it really felt like this is a brand new story. Thank you to those who waited and sorry to those who were in the middle of reading them when I deleted this.

297 notes View Post

butterflytaeil

2 years ago

still here

summary: it all started with a kiss from your best friend, mark. and most cases, one night stands do not usually end well... right?

note: best friend!mark, sexual implications, cursing/profanities, making out? and purely confused and panicking mark lee.

genre: 99.9% angst and 0.1% fluff | word count: 1.5k

- mark never had a good night's sleep in a while until now.

he opened his eyes and the window to his left side almost told him “good morning”, so bright, so sunny. but he looked at the bookshelves beside a study table, and the bulletin board stacked with utility bills and polaroid films of friends just above a supposed to be a replica of surely an andy warhol pop-art painting.

this was definitely not mark’s room.

he was about to remove the blanket that is sitting on his legs when a figure beside him shuffled a little. the back facing him was bare, messy hair all he could see. but he instantly recognized it, and the room, for so long; because it was you.

slightly panicking, mark carefully removed the warm clothing above his thighs then there he saw that he was only wearing his boxers. right above, just a little, he could see the messy lining of his shirt, and it was definitely worn the other way around.

he rose from the bed carefully, avoiding causing any disturbance. mark made sure his footsteps were inaudible while he was looking for his pants and grey hoodie on the floor. he slowly picked his jeans up, but the belt still made a faint clang noise that he held it so tightly while putting it back on. he also removed his wrinkled, reversed shirt so it would be worn correctly this time before topping it with his grey hoodie.

then mark just… stood there in front of your bed, watching you, trying to recall what has happened last night. then it was all slowly coming back to him.

now, if you happened to wake up at this very moment, then what would he do?

mark bit his lower lip as he was trying to answer the question he is about to face later on. he suddenly felt the need to apologize.

maybe because may have been selfish.

he suddenly kissed you while watching before sunrise. maybe, just maybe, if the romantic and sexual tension were not so intense throughout the film, then he would not have needed to finally act upon what he has been thinking all this time.

but the fact that you gave in... god, he thought, you gave in. no sight of alcohol around, just pure sober thoughts. mark has no idea where he got the push.

but was he remember asking you if you wanted it. mark needed the confirmation, just to make sure you are on the same page as him.

“you want this, right?”

you were catching your breath from the heated kiss when he asked. and yes, you wanted more.

“i would not hold back this time, baby”, you giggled. you liked him calling you baby. “are you sure?”

“mark..." you replied. "baby…”

you were straddling him and started kissing his neck again. mark’s eyes were closed and feeling his crotch against your clothed sex, but he was not so sure that you understand; that if you continue along, the morning may not be the same anymore.

and now, with mark wondering, here we are.

so he removed your arms, now wrapped around his neck while you planted kisses on his cheek, and firmly intertwined his hand with yours.

mark looked you in the eyes so intently, your gaze could not leave his.

“i’m asking again,”, he emphasized. “are you sure you really want to do this?”

and it took you seconds to nod, as you had already caught what he is thinking—the consequences, the adjustments, the confrontation to be served via breakfast.

“mmh”, you hummed.

“words. i need to hear it.”

“yes, mark. i want this.”, you replied. “do you?”

“yes, i do… so much.” he put his palm on the right side of your cheek, just a little graze yet soft, so warm, so lovely. “you have no idea.”

mark has been staring at your still-sleeping figure for too long. too long, really. should he just leave a text that says, “hey... we need to talk about last night.”? or maybe go for an old-fashioned way and write a note saying “i had to go. errands.”, when in fact, it is a sunday morning and he is actually on work leave?

but omitting some words behind these questions, should he leave?—the simple question as it is, but would he be treating you the same as his one-night stands? for him, you deserve more than just ditching and letting avoidance do its own work at this point. you are a friend—the best friend.

you finally shuffled from your former position, still sleeping. from facing the back, your body is now almost facing where mark stands still. his fight or flight response is now asking him several questions. he wanted to run from the consequences he emphasized last night. he thought he could handle them but fuck, no.

mark, noticing that you were still unconscious made him run his fingers through his hair. slightly frustrated and he may have muttered "fuck, fuck, fuck!", a little too loud and-

“just lock the door when you leave, mark.”

mark froze on his feet, mouth agape at your sudden words.

you said it so... nonchalantly. and so you went back to your former position, facing your back against him once again too quickly but still, eyes closed.

you were waiting for him to leave immediately now you may have answered the thing that has been bugging him for minutes now.

and of course, you knew the moment you gave in, there was no turning back. you wish you could say “i love you.”, but you would have rather devour into the kiss, hoping your actions would translate those words instead. so you went along; touching him for the very first time, and feeling all of him for the last time.

but what hurts most is that you know where this is gonna go, that you will wake up to the sounds of shuffling and rummaging the one-night stand’s clothes on the floor, and the footsteps while the guy is putting his shoes on. and what has happened this morning so far is no exception.

maybe mark was too kind just to leave because you are you. and it stings more to know that you are just… a friend.

and it hurts more to see that he was ready to go.

so you just had to instruct him what others usually do. and you just wish you woke up a little later on an empty, messy bed—finding him gone for good.

mark felt a strong pang struck into his chest. he felt like his heart is being held tight, being twisted, being ripped into pieces.

and it hurts him more that you thought he was going to leave, that you thought he was going to be another one-night stand, and that you have already accepted that everything that you both went through is now ruined.

so when mark walked towards the door, your breath suddenly hitched but was inaudible. he clicked the lock, turned the doorknob, and you heard the door opening and closing.

you finally let out a sob that has been desperately wanting to be released as he was collecting his things.

tears damped your pillow until your cries lulled you to sleep.

your room is illuminated by the sunset, thanks to the always bright window. already past afternoon, you managed to escape the dreadful morning.

a little foolish of you, really, to check your phone and hope mark would leave a text. you chuckled at the ridiculous thought, only to find your notification bar empty.

but then you heard faint noises coming from your living room. a little shuffling and steps over there. you stood up and opened your door.

and there he was, actually in the kitchen, checking out what is in your refrigerator. you slowly walked in his direction.

“mark?”

he turned around and said, “hey.”

“what are you doing?”

“trying to cook.”

and he was holding his phone, and there appears to be a cooking tutorial paused on the screen.

“cook what?”

“pesto…? actually, dang, you don’t have enough ingredients so i’m just gonna do a quick run at 7/11 so—”

“mark?”, you asked, now more confused than ever, “you never left.”

for mark, this was never a mistake. he had wanted and waited for this for so long. this—overcoming the boundaries and just feeling you entirely–the making out, the fucking, the embracing, the tangled bodies, the intertwined hands, the how are yous, the sharing of joys and growing pains, everything and more; and most importantly, the i love yous.

he finally did not walk out the door for once, now that he has had you in his arms last night. no fumbling with the bags this time.

enough of the jealousy and the constant checking of his phone, waiting for a text after you went out on a date, thinking he is going to lose you to another guy because mark could never say how much you mean to him. no more subtle touching, like how he likes it when he wraps his arms around your shoulders. sometimes, he would just leave it there after saying he needs to protect you while crossing the street. and more, so much more.

mark needs more—never from but of–mark needs more of you. because good god, for once, he knows what love is—and love is the entirety of you.

so mark just shrugged with a sheepish grin plastered on his face.

“still here, baby.”

and you loved that cute, stupid smile every single time.

what a sight.

2K notes View Post

butterflytaeil

2 years ago

give me a kiss — mark

> summary . your boyfriend is a little shy to love you sometimes.

> genre . fluff, established relationship, boyfriend!mark, gn!reader

> warnings . minor language

(wc) > 1.9k

(sunny’s note) ☆ had a dream about this, almost cry when i woke up ‘cause it was just too cute.

Mark didn’t want any attention on him, none at all. He was laying low about your relationship, not saying too much or even anything about it to anyone. He didn’t go public, he didn’t want to go public. If someone were to find out, his response depended on how close he was to that person in question. If it was his friends, he would tell them that you and him were going out and refuse to farther elaborate. However if it was just an acquaintance, he would either straight-up deny the existence of your relationship or come up with an excuse to flee.

Of course, you were upset at him hiding you from people. Saying that you two were just friends, or making people forget that you and him were a ‘thing’ in the first place. Mark treated you like another one of his homeboy outside of the privacy of your own home. He did not initiate affection, he was too shy to hold your hand with the eyes of people looking left and right.

He would dap you up instead of kissing you when there were still people around, no hugs, no nothing. But you understood, if that was what your boyfriend want, then you’d act along with him. You didn’t want to force him into giving you affection, especially when it was outside and in the open for a bunch of strangers to stare at. You were touch-starved as hell, but you would always try your best to pull through for Mark.

Wrapping your arms around his waist, you nuzzled yourself into his chest. Your cheeks brushing against the rough fabric of his sweatshirt, his heart was already picking up its pace as soon as you touched him. No wonder he didn’t want you to be affectionate in public, he would most definitely explode or have an episode. If this was already how his body response to you being touchy in private, what would happen out in public then?

“Oh-um—do you need something, babe?” Mark asked, not too sure how to react to your behavior. He could feel himself starting to sweat, even though the air was blowing coldness through the AC unit. It was a mere feeling, he wasn’t going to actually sweat. But it was not any better though! He felt nauseous too, this weird sensation stirring up his internal organs. Was it excitement or embarrassment?

"No, I just feel like cuddling." You pulled him closer, hands rubbing against his abdomen. The sweatshirt as a barrier still didn't help with making him react neither negatively or positively. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to feel this type of way, he desperately wanted to feel comfortable with you too. However, it seemed that he could never when you touch him like that.

Choosing to love you was a dangerous idea, you were bad, bad for his poor heart. Mark sure did love you, though he didn’t express it too often, but he was head over heels. Sometimes it was all about the subtle things, how your hot fingers grazed against his coldness. Your soft lips brushing the skin on his neck, gently kissing the mole he has. It was the sparkles in your eyes that hooked him completely, they told him that you were happy to have him.

Mark began, "Hey, uh, you still want to come over to Jaemin's with me tonight? It's okay if you change your mind."

"Yeah, of course I still want to go. Why? Do you not want me to go?" You looked up at him, your brows furrowed a bit in confusion.

Turning his gaze to elsewhere, the guilt in him was stirring up as your eyes fixed on him. "No, it's just that we would be drinking a lot. And I don't want to be a burden, you know?" Mark was fairly well with handling his liquor, but in the unfortunate case of him getting drunk, you would have to be the one to take care of him. And that would be the biggest embarrassment in his life.

“Mark, it’s fine.” You held his hand, reassuring him that letting loose was okay. “I want you to have fun.”

You knew your boyfriend’s friends well enough to ask them for assistance if you needed, and you also knew your limit to stop. If he could let go of himself tonight and trust you, getting drunk would not be a problem. The worst case scenario was crashing at Jaemin’s place, which would be a bit of a hassle, but at least it was not out on the road under the influence of alcohol.

You already got dressed—in the same outfit you went out for coffee this morning. It was just going to Jaemin's for a fun night and not some crazy elaborate house party, there was no point of getting all dressed up in nice clothing than a fit of t-shirt and baggy jeans. Talking about being dressed up, there was a possibility of getting vomit on you if any of the others got too drunk, try negotiating with the dry-cleaners.

You arrived at Jaemin's place a tad later than expected, he lived farther into the city and it took around half an hour to unstuck your car from terrible traffics. How the hell was the traffics so bad on a Saturday night? Was there a social gathering that everyone was invited to but you?

One, two, or three cars parked in front of the driveway. Getting into lines with the others, Mark turned off the engine. Walking out with you to the front door, he didn't hold your hand but you could feel his fingers brushing against your palm. He wanted to, he wanted to oh-so badly but he could not bring himself into doing it.

“You made it! Come quick, Chenle brought this really fancy imported wine and we are getting fucked-up tonight!” Jaemin came out before the two of you could ring the bell on his door, scared you with all the energy that exuded from his voice.

He turned his eyes to you, “Hey, [Y/N], Mark finally have the balls to bring you along to one of our hangouts. Glad to have you!”

You knew already that Mark and his friends held hangouts and parties from time to time, he always left with the same old reason and never offered to bring you with him before. Hearing that coming from one of his friends, sounded like he had been talking about you to them for a while. It was a nice feeling, maybe even got your heart kicking around in your ribcage a bit.

“Mark, what took you so long? We’re starving and it’s all your fault.” Donghyuck blamed from his place on the couch.

“I told you idiots to eat without me, and we were stuck in traffics.” Mark replied, sitting down with you on a different couch. They probably waited for him, that was nice of them, but the food wouldn’t be as hot as it used to be a couple while ago.

The salmon was cooked fairly good for a guy who lived alone, it was juicy and well-seasoned—and it had been sitting out for some time. Plus, it went amazing with the wine that Chenle brought to the table. Mark seemed to love the dinner too, you saw his eyebrows lifting up a few centimeters each time he took another bite. You were going to one-up Jaemin, how could he have the audacity to cook better food for your boyfriend? Unacceptable, you shall declare war.

It must’ve been the alcohol in your system that got you all relaxed. It also fueled the touch-starved behavior in you, with your head almost in the clouds. you went to find your boyfriend in the other room. His back towards you, busy talking with the others. You wanted a kiss, just one kiss and you would be set for the night. Just one kiss and you promised to behave.

His body jumped slightly when he felt arms, from the corners of his eyes saw you hanging on his shoulders. His friends turned their attention to you too, stopping them mid-conversation. Mark was worried you might have accidentally hurt yourself or something, worse, begging for his attention! His heart was weak, and he known full-well you would take advantage of it.

Your voice, in a low enough volume to not be screaming but to only be heard by the circle of people you two were surrounded with. The moment you just said ‘fuck it’, “Babe, give me a kiss.”

He thought he would have the upper-hand since he foreseen you being affectionate as a way to get attention, but he guessed he miscalculated things. Plan A had failed, and no plan B to be expected. No! No mouth-to-mouth action could be done at a place like this, you were the cause of his downfall. Your persistence controlled you, your lips lingering around his sensitive skins, whining and almost crying to him for a single kiss.

"[Y/N], are you alright? Why are you acting like that? Are you drunk?" Tugging on his shirt, you refused to give up. You were getting a kiss and that was it, you weren't asking for too much, only one kiss from your boyfriend. He placed his hands behind your back, trying his best to hold you up so you wouldn't come crashing down and hurt yourself—though, you were the problem, you were technically pulling on him to get him closer to your lips.

The others offered no help, assholes, standing there and rooting with their big mouths. With you in his arms, both falling over backward onto the hard wooden flooring beneath. As a habit—or even a natural instinct—one of his hand flew to your head, shielding you from the wall behind.

"Babe, babe, babe! Answer me, are you okay?!" Mark panicked, calling out for you in a desperate manner. He shook your limp body in his hold, it reacted like a rag doll from how light-headed that dammed wine got you.

You were not okay, and a kiss would do the trick! Holding his face, feeling how hot and blushing you made him become. He felt like a heat pack, a warmth that you wanted to do nothing but stay in forever. Tears sliding from your eyes and off your face, lips pouting to manipulate him more.

"Can you kiss me? Please, Mark, just one kiss." You solicited.

In front of all his friends, wouldn't it be embarrassing? But, yes, he wished he had enough confidence to outwardly show you his love. And in a hard situation like this, he loved you too much to not not make you happy. You got what you want, he gave in. Pressing his lips against yours, calming down your cries. You heard faint cheers in the background, but you were too focused on his soft, sweet lips that made nothing audible.

You passed out soon after, but he was holding you in his arms the whole time you were unconscious. Of course, his friends teased him and telling him to get a room. But even if he tried, you would not let him go. You were all snuggled on his laps, leaving him with no chance of escape. You, on his laps, peacefully sleeping while he thought about how he was going to survive this cuteness. Oh, you were going to kill him someday.

“Shh, shut up, my baby’s sleeping.”

1K notes View Post

butterflytaeil

2 years ago

the only way I could Remember that you were once mine - haechan one shot

hi! sooo candy dropped this week and omg they're soooo cute🥺🥺😩😩 go stream candy!! anyways here's another fluff scenario with my favorite sunshine, if u can pls leave comments saying 'YOU'RE DOING GREAT HAECHAN!' 💛

if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

(gif not mine, credits to owner)

The Only Way I Could Remember That You Were Once Mine - Haechan One Shot

If anyone was to see you right now, standing outside your ex's door, knocking hysterically with tears running down your face they would think you're out of your mind.

Which you kind of are, your dog which your ex gifted you and co-parents with you has gone missing.

Haechan opens the door, confused with the rapid knocking only to see you standing on the other side of the door looking like that. Instantly his mind goes haywire, thinking of the worst.

"What happened?! Are you hurt?" he ask, quickly but gently pulling you inside his dorm. Checking for any injuries but he didn't see anything.

"Y/N! I need to know what happened" Haechan says, growing more and more worried with every second

"Da- Daisy, she's- she's missing. I can't find her" you said in between hiccups. Now Haechan loves that dog as much as you, but right now he feels a bit of weight lifted off his shoulders when he heard you're okay.

Gently he gathers you in his arms, shushing and gently patting you on the back to calm you down. "Shhh it's okay shhh she'll be fine. We'll find her, but first I need you to calm down"

When you finally stopped crying, Haechan hands you a bottle of water. He already has his coat on, keys and phone in his pocket ready to go whenever you're ready. Only when you were done drinking he notices you weren't wearing any jacket, just an old shirt of his he probably left at your place.

He goes back to his room to grab a hoodie for you, knowing how easily you get cold.

"When and where did you last saw her?" Haechan asks, handing you the hoodie. You didn't ask any question, instead you put it on you. Your mind focused only on finding your furbaby.

"At home, I just took the trash out I must've left the door open. I couldn't find her after that" you can already feel the tears going again

Haechan pulls his phone out, checking the tracking app that was connected on her collar. Coincidently he got it last week when it was his turn to have her for the week.

"What's that?" you ask, "Tracking chip, I had it installed in her collar luckily"

"You did? Is she near? Where is she?" you ask while walking towards him to see his phone screen, he shows it to you

"She's nearby, see. We'll find her" he assures you.

The two of you walked out on the cold night, hands shoved in your pocket. You notice how much colder it got, this made you worry more about your dog.

"I'm such a bad furmom"

"No, you're not. You didn't mean it"

"I can't lose her" you whisper, more to yourself but Haechan heard you. He knows she means the world to you, when he gave you Daisy he has never seen a bigger smile on your face. Attacking him with kisses and thanks afterwards.

When the two of you called it quits, he ofcourse left the dog with you. She was yours more than his. But you know just how much Haechan adores her too so sometimes Daisy spends time with him.

"We'll find her, we're close" he says, looking again at his phone screen.

"Daisy, daisy girl where are you" you say outloud, beckoning your dog to come out when suddenly a blur of white comes dashing towards you and Haechan.

"Oh my god! You're okay, hi love you're okay you're safe" you say over and over again while you try to hug the overly excited puppy. Meanwhile Haechan just stands back and watch you reunite with your and technically his furbaby.

Daisy then runs over to him, clawing on his legs wanting to be picked up. "Hey crazygirl, you got us worried. Where did you run off to huh" Haechan says, hugging the puppy close to him.

He can hear a few sniffles coming from you, quickly looking over to see you wiping a few tears away.

"See, she's fine. No more crying" he tells you with a small smile,

"Sorry"

"Sorry for what?" he asks you, confused why you were apologizing.

"I just barged in your apartment like that, then I was freaking out and now you had to come out in this cold night to go find her"

He shakes his head, looking down at the white fluff wiggling on his chest like she was looking for warmth. He opens his jacket to put her inside, carrying her like that instead.

"I would've come and find her for you"

You didn't say anything, pursing your lips and looking at the puppy now all cuddled up in his jacket.

"Let's get the two of you home" he whispers, "I can go home by myself, no need to tire yourself out" you protest but Haechan wasn't having any of it.

For months now he's been looking for a way to talk to you. Whenever you drop Daisy off you never really say more than a few words to him, this is his chance he wasn't about to waste it.

Also there's no way in hell he was letting you walk back home alone, by yourself this late at night.

He pulls you by the hoodie, leaving you no choice but walk beside him.

"I can walk by myself you know, I got to your apartment fine"

"I'm surprised you didn't trip on your way, you were a mess" he jokes, this earned him a light punch on the side

"I only tripped like three times running up the stairs, the elevator in your building still sucks and I was in a hurry"

"You could've called me instead, or did you delete my number?" he looks over at you, you were looking down at your shoes

"So you did delete it" he mumbles

"No use deleting it when I have it memorized. I didn't even think about it, I was just freaking out when I can't find her inside the house so I just ran to you" you explain

"Why?" he asks

"Why what?"

"Why'd you run to me?"

You stare back at him, thinking of some other answer but it's like his eyes were compelling you to say the truth

"I knew you'd know what to do, I didn't know who else to call. I only thought of you"

After all this time you still trust him that much and that meant the world to Haechan. You may not be together anymore but knowing you still think of him when you need someone, hearing he's still the first one on your list elicits this warm feeling in him.

"Save my number" he says, not knowing what else to say

"Huh?"

"Save my number so next time you won't have to dial it manually, when you need me I'm one dial away. I'll show up, whenever wherever no matter the time I'll show up. You don't have to be the one running to me, don't want you tripping on the way" he jokes

"Yah!" you scold him, meanwhile he just laughs at how cute you were. The fluffball you both love now napping in his arms,

"Thank you, for tonight. And for Daisy" you sincerely tell him, "You already thanked me for her"

"Yea well I don't think it'll ever be enough, she's my everything. I wouldn't know what to do without her. It's like you knew I needed her, so thank you"

In his mind he thanks you too, for showing up in his life. For being his for some time in this lifetime. For being the girl he never knew he wanted and needed, and yet you're the one he keeps coming back to. Like the universe knew he needed you.

"Thank you, too" he tells you, you just shot him a smile. Continuing your walk back home with him and your little one. Maybe tomorrow he'll gather the courage and fate decides to be on his side again.

"Tomorrow, I'm taking her to this dog cafe. If you wanna come with" you invite him, the universe answering him immediately.

"I would love to"

"Okay, tomorrow then"

242 notes View Post

butterflytaeil

2 years ago

how was miso adopted? was she originally jungkook or oc’s cat? i love the miso detail so much lmao i can’t get over her

478: drabble

alternatively, jungkook is willing to take an everyday risk :)

[ 478 drabbles ]

“My girlfriend likes you for some reason.”

Jungkook deadpans at the cat sat on the sidewalk, her eyes big and curious even under a wonky, flickering streetlight.

“You keep following Y/N to her workshops. You always wait outside,” he hums, grunting as he lowers himself down to the cold pavement. The two of you have been seeing the cat nonstop nowadays, all to the point that you’ve started carrying cat food in your bag and leaving it to him while he waits for you to be done with your work for the day.

The cat sits still but she still meows as if she understands everything that Jungkook’s saying, making him chuckle in disbelief.

“Guess what I brought,” he lowly cheers, adding in a whoop for good measure before he gestures to the crate beside him. The inside of it looks even warmer than what he’s wearing now, clearly having thought of this more than he makes it out to be.

“Dear fucking god, I hope you’re hypoallergenic,” Jungkook mutters as he gestures his hands out to put the cat into the crate but it looks like he won’t have to exert effort because she enters it herself, her tail brushing past his arm that it triggers a sneeze. “How nice. I’m allergic to you.”

Jungkook sighs a breath of relief now that the hard part is over because he didn’t even need to convince the cat, closing the crate door behind her but if he thinks about it, he’s sure that she wouldn’t escape even if he hadn’t.

“I’m the only one taking you in for now, okay? My girlfriend doesn’t know yet,” he mutters, making direct eye contact with the cat that even the concept of her listening surprises him. “Okay, maybe fiancée soon because I’m planning on proposing. When we move in together, you would have us both,” he adds. “Don’t get it twisted though. I’m not using you as a pawn for my proposal.”

Jungkook shivers in the cold but before he makes his trek to the pharmacy to buy his allergy medicine, and back to his apartment building, he makes the decision to sneak in his scarf to the crate so the cat would feel extra toasty.

Ah. So this is the feeling.

Maybe love doesn’t always compulse Jungkook to say I love you to you every night.

Sometimes, love tends to make Jungkook adopt a stray cat despite horrible allergies and the commitment to take anti-histamines for as long as you’ll have him in your life (he hopes forever), as long as the white ball of fur makes you happy.

346 notes View Post

butterflytaeil

2 years ago

for the 478 request (if it's still open!!) maybe a lil bit of them growing back together? like post-fic, maybe jungkook discovers a small habit that OC does that they never did before?? and he gets :(( abt it bc omg when did that happen and OC is like when u were gone bro but like its fluffy and all?? DO I MAKE SENSE?? (It's alright either way ILY anyway<3)

478: drabble

alternatively, jungkook’s habit becomes yours too <3

[ 478 masterlist ]

Jungkook thought it was only a fluke.

“Is something the matter?” he asks worriedly, eyes strained with concern. You’re too absorbed cooing at Miso on your lap that you didn’t notice your husband staring at you the whole time.

He’s completely unfocused from the movie he’s begged for the two of you to watch instead of your own pick, mouth parting as he sees you do it again.

“No?” you tilt your head, looking equally as confused.

“Are you sure?” Jungkook questions again, rearranging his position so this time he’s the one lying down on your lap and Miso’s the one on his chest, feeling her purrs reverberate all the way to his ribs. “Then why are you playing with your wedding band?”

Oh.

You’ve been doing it a lot these days, unconsciously twisting the platinum on your finger that it catches your husband off-guard every time. He thought it was only a fluke the first time, seeing your gazed zoned out that usually happens when you’re tired from work.

“Really?” you sound just as surprised, looking down on your finger before having the urge to twist it again. In hindsight, your husband’s right — you have been playing with your ring. “It must’ve become a habit when we were on break.”

You recall having the weight of the platinum being your comfort for the month, only taking it off the very last minute before shooting starts and have someone to remind you because you were just that attached to it.

In hindsight, the habit you didn’t even know you had seems to be familiar.

“I think I picked it up from you.”

“Me?” Jungkook’s eyebrows furrow, looking down on his ring finger and just from seeing the band, he gets the urge to twist it around his finger.

He didn’t even know he’s been playing with his wedding band whenever he needed comforted or just wanted to be reminded of you in general, but now that you pointed out, it is familiar.

Jungkook chuckles, making you warm with the way he leans to your touch when you scratch his scalp.

“Oh, yeah. I think you got it from me.”

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butterflytaeil

2 years ago

“I choose to love you in silence because in silence I find no rejection, and in silence no one owns you but me.”

— Rumi

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butterflytaeil

1 year ago

lee and lily - haechan dad scenario

hello!! just wanted to write a quick haechan fluff. haechan as a girl dad, i just know he'll be the most gentle and caring and whipped dad 🥺😭

if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

"Honey, I'm home! oh what are you doing there, angelbug?"

Haechan stops by the doorway when he spots his daughter sitting on the bottom step with her arms crossed and a frown on her cute little face

"Time out" his daughter answers with a pout, Haechan had to hold back his laugh just in case you're around watching. He tries not to get in your way whenever you discipline your 4 year-old daughter, he did it once and he ended up in trouble with you too.

You always tell him she's too spoiled, how can he not spoil her though?

Lee Nari, you and Haechan's first born. Baby girl was born on June 06, yes the same day as your husband. The two of you were enjoying his birthday dinner at home with his family when it happened, it was to say the least a very dramatic way of entering the world. Little Nari knew how to announce her entrance, a few hours later she was born.

Since then she's been yours and Haechan's world. You can control yourself when it comes to giving her what she wants and teaching her how the real world works but her father is a whole another story.

If Haechan could, he'd give Nari the world on a silver platter. When she was a newborn, she would make the slightest little baby noise and Haechan would be on his feet checking on her.

You adore it. You love how he loves his daughter. There's no doubt she'll have one man loving her truly for the rest of her life. As long as Haechan is around, Nari would be loved and cared for and protected.

Walking towards his daughter before crouching down to meet her eyes,

"Did you do something that you weren't suppose to?" he asks

"She drew on the wall with markers, then when I asked her if she did it she said Uju did" this time Haechan let out a chuckle when he heard your explanation, looking up the staircase to see you standing with a rag and bottlespray in your hands. Probably cleaning up the mess little Nari made.

"Who knew our dog was an artist" he jokes, he stands up before cupping his hand over Nari's ears "How long has it been?" referring to her being on time out

"Like 5 minutes, atleast talk to her Hyuck. She's getting cheekier and cheekier by the day, and you're not helping" you told your husband, walking down the stair

"I do help" "Yeah, help her with getting away with things" you counter

"Okay, you're not wrong. Not my fault I can't say no to our baby, she can do no wrong in my eyes" he says, you give him a pointed look. One he understood even without words.

"I'll talk to her" he tells you before looking down to Nari

"Let's go, Nari. We'll help mommy clean up, okay?" he says as he picks up his daughter in his arms.

Before the two Lee's make their way upstairs, Haechan speaks again

"Now, what do we say to mommy?" he asks Nari who is currently playing with the button on his shirt

"Sorry, mommy" Nari mumbles

"Doesn't count if you don't look in her eyes. Now try again" he tells her gently.

You don't talk, just stood beside the daddy and daughter duo. Haechan has always been the energetic, all-out type of person. But when he's with his little girl, he's the most gentle man.

The little Lee looks up and look at you with a small pout on her lips, "Sorry, mommy"

Haechan looks at you, waiting for you to succumb under her powers just like he always do. Like he had when he first held her in his arms. Like how he'll always be for the rest of his life.

"Don't do it again okay, and don't lie to mommy when I ask you. I forgive you" you tell her with a small smile. Leaning over to give her a kiss on the head

"Hey, where's my kiss?" Haechan says, earning an eye roll from you but you comply nonetheless.

After all, Nari isn't the only Lee who has you wrapped around their finger.

Giving Haechan a quick kiss on the lips before passing the rag and spray bottle to him. "Goodluck, love you" you tease him, lightly pushing him upstairs.

"You see angellove, there's this thing in your playroom. The coloring books and canvass I got you, you can paint and draw on them all day so that you and I don't have to clean. And mommy won't get mad, she's scary when she's mad"

"Lee Donghyuck!"

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